The Reason I Don't Care
Chapter 2
"Yes, I'm alive. Now can we all please get over it. It's been a six months since you found out John and Mary and you, brother mine, never thought I was dead", I said.
"Sherlock-", John started, "Sherlock does this news of your brother in love... bother you?"
"No, of course not. Why would it?", I asked impatiently.
"So, you're not bothered by it? You're not upset?", he asked surprised. He raised an eyebrow.
"Didn't I say that I that it didn't bother me?", I said in an annoyed tone, "So obviously it doesn't".
I was being careful with the signs I was giving off. I could feel Mycroft's eyes dancing over me. I made it so that Mycroft would only be able to read signs that he was handling the news well, of course they were false signs. I chuckled.
"Mycroft anything?", John said.
Oh so now John was asking Mycroft to read me. Great. Just great. I rolled my eyes and stood up. I went over to the mantle and lifted my skull. I turned it upside down and reached for two nicotine patches. I made sure that no one in the room could see my hidden pack of cigarettes. I didn't smoke but there is sometimes that I just smoked a single cigarette because of something that had happened. Luckily I had hidden my other items that I didn't want anyone, especially John, to see. The things that Mycroft was talking about. He of course already knew.
"Nothing John", Mycroft said with a smirk on his face.
He knew what I was thinking. I put the patches on my right forearm. John picked up on what I was doing. I need to think. I picked up my coat and put it on.
"Excuse me, but I have some unfinished business to attend to", I said as I walked past the trio. I had made it to the door when Mycroft said something.
"It would seem old habits die hard", he said turning around in John's chair. Once again he had the constipated look on his face.
"Good Evening Mycroft", I said not turning around and slowly shut the door.
I walked down the stairs abd bumped into Mrs. Hudson, who was caring tea upstairs, and asked her to relay a message to John: 'I won't be home tonight'. She agreed and quickly brought the trio their tea. I on the other hand had something else other than tea on my mind. Alcohol.
I had made john believe that when I needed to think I turned to drugs. It made more sense. A high functioning Sociopath turns to drugs to gain more knowledge or to think clearer. Different drugs have different effects on different people. It made sense from a medical point of view which is why I led John to believe that I was a druggie.
Alcohol in a medical perspective is mostly a sedative. Something that John would never understand if I told him. He would never understand that I never had a choice.