Chapter 32

Sakura visits Sasuke

Sakura had waited a few days to go see Sasuke after his operation while she took care of other patients. She was glad that he seemed to understand the gravity of what he had done and took responsibility for his actions by admitting he deserved his punishment. There wasn't much that she had to say to him since recently he assumed she had forgiven him. She may not have been the strongest shinobi, and she may not have been the best back when Sasuke was on her team, but she was different now. She felt like she knew the real him that he hid from the world, but he had never taken the time to know who she was, and if she thought about it, she would admit to herself that it was because he never cared to.

She decided not to hold that against him, it was her stupid feelings that have always gotten in the way. Plus, there was no way they would get to know each other if she kept holding on to feelings like that. It was time to visit him, she knew he didn't get any other visitors besides Kakashi once a week, and she started to feel guilty.

She made up her mind that she would go and was there within a few minutes. She had to walk past the Ombu Black Ops members in order to visit him and he was still under heavy guard. Only her and Shizune were authorized to use medical ninjuitsu or even come through the detention center to visit him. They let her into the area where Sasuke was being held, he sat up when he saw her.

She walked in and sat down in a chair across the room, neither one greeted each other until Sakura spoke up. "How is your arm?" she asked him, being careful not to imply she cared how 'he' was.

"I have one now, I suppose that's a start." He answered.

"This visit is off to a great start already," she thought. She just stared at him, disappointed in his too cool attitude for the first time.

She got up and started to leave, "well have a good day Sasuke," she added and she began to walk out the way she came.

"Wait," he yelled "Where are you going Sakura, you just got here." He pointed out.

"Well you're getting on my nerves," she stated as she turned around to face him.

He had a surprised look on his face "I only spoke one sentence," he said, incredulous.

"If now's not a good time, I can come back later," she added

"Now is fine Sakura," he replied "and now I know how Naruto feels." he started to smile.

She couldn't help it, it was funny, she started to laugh a little and went to sit back down in the chair.

He started talking this time, knowing she wasn't going to carry the conversation like usual. If he wanted her to stay he would have to be polite.

"Have you been busier than usual," he asked

She sifted in the chair and answered "not really." "You?"

"Well, it's pretty much the same for me, just bored." He wanted to know why she hadn't come to visit him but it sounded like it was because she didn't want to. He deserved that. He was curious about what made her keep coming around after the way he had behaved towards her. Last time he started asking her about it she seemed furious and hadn't come back since. He was used to Sakura from when they were teammates but he didn't have any feelings for her.

"I bet Naruto's out of the hospital by now," he questioned her.

"Yeah, he is. He just got out this morning," she answered.

"I bet he was driving everyone crazy, did they make him leave early?" he asked

"No, actually," she paused, not sure she wanted to tell him what had happened the evening of the operation. "He just recovered well is all," she said with a convincing fake smile.

Sasuke smiled back at her, a real smile "I can tell there's something you're not telling me Sakura," he mentioned as she looked him in the eyes "but it's okay."

She decided to leave that topic where it was and move on. "Have you heard anything from the 5th about when they might…" she faltered, he knew the rest.

"No," he shook his head, "and I won't expect it anytime soon. The 5th Hokage only saw me for my surgery but she's made it clear that she considers me a war criminal, which I am. I can't argue with her logic for wanting to have me locked up."

"I can," she piped in.

"What, because I helped?" he scoffed

"Not just because of that," she continued "because you and Naruto are the strongest Shinobi's in the world, what is the point of keeping you locked up when you can just break out. The whole war was fought because of an issue that the leaf hadn't resolved since its inception, that's hardly your cross to bear although you act like it is. Also, it is a big deal that you helped, it took both of you to save everyone. You may have some dark in you Sasuke, but you're not all dark."

He was surprised to hear her point of view, and she was right, the whole war was fought over issues from the leaf village, issues that just wouldn't resolve generation after generation. When he decided to help he decided to be the generation that would break the cycle. He needed to clarify something for Sakura though.

"The point of locking me up is to see if I will escape. I want to be back with my clan, since I have no clan I have the village. The Hokage knows this and is testing me to see if I am capable of restraining myself for a greater cause. To see if I can put others ahead of myself." He added in a melancholy voice.

She had been watching him while he explained and wondered what it was that eventually did change his mind. "I'm curious," she began "it seems that it wasn't feelings of guilt that made you want to stop, but wanting to belong, or realizing that you do belong." She left the last part open as a question.

He waited before answering "I'm curious about something too, if I answer will you answer my question," he asked.

She was surprised by his question, "I guess so," she answered.

"And not get angry at me for asking and then refuse to visit for days on end." He added.

She could see where this was going and she didn't want to go that direction. "So you noticed," she said.

"yeah, I noticed," he repeated.

She sighed deeply, "okay" she relented. "But I get my answer first."

"It was realizing that I did belong. After all I did to distance myself and all the terrible things I did to create barriers, Naruto, Kakashi, and you showed me that there are things stronger than that. If you have people that stand behind you when you're your worst self, and can still be there for you, that is family. I was reminded before the battle what family meant to me, and then I saw it again in our fight. You guys never gave up on me, it's more than I deserve after all I put you though."

"Now I get to ask my question," he reminded her. "How did you not give up on me?" he asked.

The answer ripped at her heart, she wished he had asked her anything but this.

He saw her struggling and thought she might try to back out. "I answered your question," he stated matter of factly.

"I know, and I'll answer yours," she replied. She took a deep breath before starting again. "When you left the village it broke my heart, I don't know what I expected from you, I was just, young and naive." He smiled at her "you were too," she continued, "or you might have taken a different path," she uttered which wiped the smile right off his face. "The Hokage agreed to send Naruto out on a mission to find you and I found him before he left and begged him to find you, I made him promise that he would never stop until he brought you back."

"Sakura," Sasuke interrupted.

She continued like he hadn't said anything. "I felt guilty for asking so much of him, time after time he would come back to the village with severe injuries, with his 9 tails seal weakened further, putting his life on the line for someone who didn't care if he lived or died." Sasuke put his head down at this part and Sakura stopped. "Not you Sasuke, I'm talking about myself," he looked up at her, stunned, he didn't understand what she was saying. "I cared so much about getting you back that I put him in that position more than once. I would ask my own friends to die just so I could be around you. I was beyond selfish. Seeing Naruto lying in the hospital the last time he met you I realized how selfish I really was, and I was disgusted." She took another deep breath and continued "The leaf had a change of leadership and Danzo became Hokage, and when he issued the order for your extermination I made a choice. I decided not to have feelings for a person I no longer knew. I decided I had to die trying to take you out of this world." She looked him straight in the eyes "I wanted to kill you Sasuke, I tried," she started to shake with emotion, holding back a sob "but I couldn't. It was when I had the chance and hesitated, in a split second, that I didn't give up on you. I didn't go back after that, even when you threatened my life." She finished.

He got more than he really wanted to know, he hadn't imagined Sakura capable of the coldness she talked about, he couldn't imagine that she was serious about killing him when she came to see him that day. He thought about how he nearly killed her after that moment and shuddered. She really had grown up, she was different than before. He looked at her like he was seeing her for the first time.

Sakura felt like she was exposed. She waited but neither of them spoke. Her last words still felt like they were hovering in the room. She refused to be the first to speak.

"I'm glad," he said after a minute "that you didn't give up."

She half smiled at him as she stood up. "In that case, I'll see you tomorrow," she added as she started to leave for the second time that day.

He nodded at her as she walked out the door.