outlander is a great book

Chapter Twelve

Counter Rejection

Point of View: [Lucy]

"So what does Lucy think of Natsu?"

I had to stop myself from puking the milkshake right back into the cup when I heard that ridiculous question. I forced myself to swallow the liquid I had been drinking before I made a mess, and waited until I calmed down before answering.

"What is this all of a sudden?" I countered with another question, watching her twirl a lock of blue hair around her forefinger, and staring off somewhere before us.

We were sitting on the benches in the indoor swimming pool, enjoying our thirty minute break before we were supposed to dive back into action and prepare for the tournament.

I leaned my head towards my curled legs, setting the cup back onto the bench. Dozing off, I stared at the blue waters in the swimming pool, watching the girls swim laps and practice beating their time. I felt really tired from all the tasks I had been picking up lately, but there was no way that I would ever admit that.

Juvia didn't reply to my question right away, and instead busied herself with filling out some of the paperwork she had to do in order to keep her swimming club going. I ignored her peeking at me every few seconds, and settled with watching the girls high-five themselves when they did good. I was going to participate in the freestyle competitive swimming race, and I was proud to be chosen for the part. The good thing was that all the sports competitions for high schools were in one day, so Juvia could get to see Gray play right before our turn.

Seeing that she wouldn't talk about the Natsu issue further, I decided to drop it as well.

"How are you satisfied with the swimmers that are going to participate in the tournament?" I asked, watching her head lift up from the paperwork and her blue eyes glisten with excitement.

"Juvia can't wait! The sports festival will come up in three weeks, and Juvia is pumped!" She said a bit too loudly, causing some heads to turn to our direction. "There will be five competitions, and our school is competing in four of them!" She kept going on and on, even though I knew most of the stuff she said. "Since our school is the biggest, we have been chosen to host the festival. The clubs that aren't associated with sports will be in charge of decorating the school grounds and preparing the gym and the swimming pool, so all Juvia has to do is work hard with swimming!"

That was true. The annual sports festival that happened every two years was just around the corner, and we were going to host it this time around. There are five categories: swimming, basketball, football, baseball and tennis. Our school has clubs for all of them, except baseball, so we were going to participate in four of the competitions, along with the other schools, which will also participate in the baseball category.

Anyone who's won some sort of prize will get a medal, and a goodie bag, so everyone was pumped and excited about what's to come. The freshmen had to work twice as hard to be accepted in the participating teams, so people who are older, like us, have a higher privilege of attending. I was going to swim freestyle, and Juvia will do the backstroke race.

"Juvia is also excited about the basketball tournament!" I heard her say, "Gray-sama will be playing!" Her eyes got that dreamy look that almost made me imagine two hearts growing inside them. "Juvia will do her best to get Gray-sama's attention!"

"Love must be nice, huh" I mumbled, looking away from her.

Seeing as though my previous experience wasn't what you'd call 'perfect', I had long since distanced myself from any sorts of relationships, not to mention that my will to be the best person alive was also not allowing me to date anyone. But I wasn't interested in it either. I came, I saw, and it didn't leave me a good enough impression to try and conquer it.

"But Lucy also knows that love is nice." Juvia said suddenly, and I turned my head to look at her. "Lucy knows that having someone run after her, talk to her, stalk her, and help her out is a nice thing to have." I opened my mouth to speak, but didn't know what to say. "Why run away from it?"

"Me and Natsu… it's not like that."

"That how did you know who Juvia is talking about?"

I stopped for a moment. How did I…? Well of course I knew, I mean, Natsu's the one who's always talking to me and… oh wait, Sting was there too. And I am even supposed to meet him after my part-time job to discuss that confession thing. Yeah… now that I think about it… why did I immediately assume that she was talking about Natsu?

"Juvia is envious of Lucy." I looked back at her, sobering up from my thoughts, "Instead of following someone around, someone follows you."

"Yeah but, what if I don't want to be followed around?"

Everyone's taking his side lately. Everyone talks about how nice Natsu is and how much of a bitch I am. But have they really thought about it? Have they really seen how troublesome it is to have someone's feelings hanging over you when you don't even want them? It's the worst.

I either have to be a bitch and yell at him, or I have to give him false hope that we can become friends. Yeah, friends. Cause after all this time, he's wanted to be my friend, ever since the first time we started studying together this year. When I said 'hi' to him and whatnot, the next day he told me that he hopes we could become great friends. And I have more friends that I need thank you very much, so he can find someone else. Why is he still bothering?!

"I'm sorry," I muttered, "I have to go get some fresh air." I got up to leave, and she didn't stop me.

Pressing number four, which stood for ice coffee on the vending machine, I waited for my cold canned beverage to drop down into the contraption, so I could drink it and try to get my thoughts in order. Why is the person following me in real life get to follow me in my thoughts, as well? Shouldn't I catch some sort of break from him, even if it's just in my mind?

"Are you going to get that, or should I go find another vending machine?"

I blushed when I noticed that I had been staring at the coffee that fell down probably ages ago. Taking it with lightning speed, I turned around to apologize to whoever I had disturbed with my foolish behavior. But just when I was about to say sorry, I realized the person was somewhat familiar. Dark ink-colored hair, menacing eyes, a careless posture, sweat dripping down his jersey—

"Gray," I said out loud, and my cheeks blushed even harder when I realized what I'd done.

"Um, we haven't been formally introduced yet, but yeah, that's me." He said, and cracked a smile for the first time since we've been standing here.

I moved to the side to let him get his daily fix of caffeine as well, and kept standing there, even though I had no business left at that place whatsoever.

He looked up at me as his hand reached for the drink, as though he waited for something to happen. When he got back up and opened his can, and I still didn't say a word, he shrugged and guessed that he was supposed to do the talking.

"So uh, what'cha up to?" His eyes darted from side to side. He was clearly embarrassed. But I should've been the embarrassed one. After all, I'm the one who said his name and kept staring at him without actually doing anything.

"I um, saw you at the shop once," I replied, even though he asked me something completely different.

"Oh yeah, that time." He mumbled, looking elsewhere, even though I didn't remember anything peculiar about it. "So you're a swimmer, huh?" He asked, still not facing me properly.

"Yeah, how did you—"

Oh my God. I had to get out of there so I didn't even—and my thoughts were filled with that idiot so I couldn't—and I was in such a hurry I didn't even have time to—I AM STILL IN MY SWIMSUIT.

"NOOOOO" I shouted, crouching down at record speed, so that I could try and cover most of my body, shivering at the thought of waking around campus wearing the school's one piece swimsuit. I was too distressed to look at other people, but I certainly gained attention! And I'm the school's top student for Pete's sake! What if someone took pictures?

"Stupid," he mumbled, but I felt something warm drape over my shoulders. I looked up, watching him stare at me with just his black shirt on his torso. He'd given me his jersey. I mumbled a quick thanks and put it on as fast as I could.

"So um," I started once again, "Sorry for blurting out your name like that, I just heard so much about you that I accidently said it."

"It's alright, I know I'm famous," He smiled, and we started walking back to the gym where he played basketball. I put the change from my drink and my phone into the pockets, and promised to give the jersey back to him when I leave the pool after club activities.

"Natsu talks a lot about you too," He said suddenly, and I felt the blood stop in my veins. "So I guess you could say I know you as well."

"What… what does he say?" I asked, taking a sip from my coffee to busy myself.

"Well, he mostly rages about how you never talk to him properly or how you don't treat him well. I think he really wants to get close to you." His words were sincere, but I couldn't believe him.

"But… I already have plenty of friends and barely any time to spend with them, let alone another one." I said, trying to defend myself. "And you're in the same boat as me!" My voice got a little louder, and he looked at me with surprise. "You also have someone following you, and it annoys you!"

He smiled once more, looking away from me, "Even though we both say it annoys us, does it really?" I looked at him, "Does it really bother us? How would we feel if we woke up one day with zero text messages and nobody to try to talk to us all day?" I couldn't even imagine that possibility. "Think about it… do we really hate being liked?"

I wanted to say yes. I wanted to stop walking and shout out to the world that I wanted nothing to do with Natsu Dragneel. But did I, really?

"So what you're saying is, you like being the center of Juvia's world?" I asked, watching him chuckle.

"I'm not saying I don't like it. I'm just waiting for the right time to make my move. After all, the guy should get the girl, not the other way around." He threw his empty can in the trash, and laced the fingers from his hands behind his head as we kept on walking. "I guess I got used to the whole thing. Having her be infatuated with me and never look at any other guy. But I'm not stupid enough to think it will last forever. One day, she will meet someone else and it will be the end of it. So even though I like acting as this untouchable guy or whatever, I know that the time will come when I'll mark my territory."

She will meet someone else and it would be the end of it.

The words replayed in my mind over and over again, until we came to a stop, and I hadn't even noticed it. I turned to look at him. "I have a big ego," he said suddenly, "But I won't let it ruin what I treasure most."

I pulled out my phone from the jersey's pocket, and before he could realize what was happening, I took a picture of him standing in front of the gym in his black t-shirt, looking sideways. I had to admit that he looked really attractive, and kind of understood Juvia's feelings.

"What did you do that for?" He asked, confused.

"I just want to show my friend what kind of face you make when she's on your mind."

His cheeks immediately got tinted with red, and he couldn't bear to look at me. "What the hell…"

I took another picture.

"This too."

We both laughed at the same time, and I thanked him for the advice. I told him that his words meant a lot to me, and even though Natsu didn't like me in that way, it was still nice to hear that someone else had the same problem as me.

"In that way?" His eyes radiated confusion, "What do you think he sees you as?"

"The best friend in the universe? I heard from a lot of people that he's very obsessive with his friendships, and I just don't have the time nor the energy to be dealing with something as energetic as that every day of my life. So ignoring him is the best choice so far."

"Best friend huh?" He mumbled, looking away from me, "So you say."

We said our goodbyes, and I turned to go towards the indoor swimming pool, happy to show Juvia those amazing pictures I got for her, and watch her squeal and hug me when she sees them. I was glad to be able to do something like that for her, after she tried to talk to me so hard, and I kept negating everything that dared come out of her mouth.

I was really hoping that she would make it with Gray. From what I saw, he's just a guy who likes being basked in all that glory, and it feeds his ego to have someone run around after him, but even he knows that he shouldn't be taking advantage of her like he's doing, especially because he feels the same way. But seeing as though he's been avoiding her all this time, it's kind of hard for him to make such an abrupt change, and be the one in charge this time. But they'll pull through and become the strongest power couple… I can feel it.

"What are you wearing?"

I stopped in my tracks, pulled back into reality by the sound of Natsu's voice, which I'd gotten to recognize every time. He was in his soccer jersey, with his knees ragged from falling too many times, and his hair rustled from all the running. He was out of breath, and the ball in front of my feet proved that he was probably training for the sports festival as well, when he'd literally ran into me. I stared at him bend down to pick up the ball, and throw it to the other players. Since I hadn't answered his questions, he mumbled a quick 'see you around', and turned to chase after the other players. But I'd seen it. I'd seen the disappointment in his eyes when he saw me wearing his best friend's jersey, and the way he'd looked away as if it were hard to look at me. He didn't want to see me. I probably disgusted him.

"Natsu!" I wasn't aware that I was the one shouting until he turned around mid-run, and stopped to hear me out. "This—" I touched the jacket on me "—I was walking around in my swimsuit, and I didn't want everyone to see it! So I didn't have a choice!" Why am I explaining myself!?

"Yeah," He shouted, "It's okay. I don't want everyone to see, either"

"So it's not like that!" I yelled even louder. "Okay?"

"Yeah!" He grinned brightly, and ran off.

But was that smile a lie? Did I actually hurt him? And why is this affecting me? I don't want anything to do with him!

Right?

I finished my math homework while on my shift, since we didn't have a lot of customers today. But I couldn't really concentrate. My mind kept going back to the talk I had with Gray and the one with Juvia. They both spoke to me about Natsu, and it made me realize something. I saw him almost every single day and I always ended up spending time with him one way or another. So even if I keep saying that I don't have any time, the moments I use to push him away can be used for talking or something. Wouldn't we both be happy that way? I will end up seeing him anyway so it's fine.

I got ready to leave. But having my mind filled with thoughts about Natsu, I almost didn't notice and smacked into Sting's chest. He was apparently waiting for me outside, and it took me a while to remember that we had arranged to meet here.

"Oh, hey" I mumbled, watching him nod back a greeting. I didn't hide the fact that I was confused, since I'd never been in a similar situation.

"Where's what's-his-face?" He asked, and I cocked my head to the side in question. "Never mind, so what's your reply?"

Oh, so he had been expecting a reply. Of course. He needed some sort of answer to the words he had given me previously, but I hadn't had time to think about what I was going to say, my mind was preoccupied with something else, and I totally forgot that we were supposed to discuss this. I looked around for some sort of escape route, but found none. Gathering up all the courage I had left, I faced him with a stern look, ready to settle this.

"I am happy that you think of me so highly," I started, my mind already darting back to all the work I had to do when I got home, and wanting to finish this as quickly as possible, "But I'm afraid I don't see you in that way. I'd hate to use the most cliché line in the book, but, it's not you, it's me."

He cringed, looking away from me, even though his eyes had stared into mine for the whole time. "It's fine," He said suddenly, a smile returning to his face, "If it's not you, then it will be some other girl." My mouth almost dropped down, "It's all the same, anyway. A girl's a girl. Anyone will do." And with just that, he walked off, leaving me frozen in the spot, feeling like I was the one that got rejected.

A girl's a girl.

The words wouldn't leave my mind the rest of the evening, not even while I was cleaning, or studying, or even cooking. They kept repeating themselves in the back of my head, and I felt like someone had just broken down the illusion I had of boy-girl relationships up until now. He didn't care who it was, as long as it was a girl? How idiotic can you get?

Is that how all guys think? Now that I think about it, he bears a close resemblance to my ex-boyfriend, who had his own share of twisted thoughts as well. I felt my head hurt at the thought of him, and decided to make myself some tea. But no matter how hard I tried to think about something else, Sting's words kept coming back into my mind.

And I'd just then noticed how much I liked the thought of having someone confess their feelings to me. I didn't even realize how happy I was to have someone say they liked me, and how much it flattered me. I didn't think about it much, true, but I still had it somewhere in the back of my conscience, and was glad that my existence had changed someone's life. I was proud of myself. My ego had grown with his words.

And to have it pop just like that? To have my thoughts shattered and feel like I'd been cheated on when we weren't even a couple in the first place?

I tried to open up my laptop and see what was new with the world, but it got me down even more. The first facebook status that popped up when I logged in, was that some Yukino girl or whatever, had just gotten in a relationship with Sting. He says he likes me, and then two hours later he's posting relationship statuses with some other person!? What is wrong with the world? Or am I just old fashioned?

I slammed my laptop shut, and decided that reading was probably the best way out of this mess.

Sliding under the warm blankets on the couch in the living room, I watched the rain that started an hour ago fall like a curtain over my window. There was no sound whatsoever, except the pitter-patter of the drops hitting the moist ground outside. And with my tea in hand, my favorite novel on my lap, and the orchestra of the clouds, I finally felt some sort of inner peace.

But evidently, it couldn't last for long.

Before I even got to turn the page, I heard the obnoxious ringtone of my cellphone signalize that I'd just gotten a message. It went on a few times, and I guessed it was Natsu; since he was the only one capable of sending multiple text messages twenty times a day.

I outstretched my hand, glad that I could reach the coffee table without having to get up from my small spot of heaven. Reading the messages with content like 'is everything okay', 'how did it go', 'how are you', 'do you need anything' and 'rice goes well with chicken', I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

Does it really bother us? How would we feel if we woke up one day with zero text messages and nobody to try to talk to us all day?

My mind went blank.

Damn you, Gray.

Having experienced that counter-rejection from Sting a while ago, I had completely forgotten that I still meant something to someone. Even if he just saw me as a friend, and even if he was just wasting time with me like Sting was, I could still get some sort of emotional satisfaction out of it. Am I a horrible person? Or have I just forgotten what it was like having people around you?

And for the first time in my life…

I decided to text back.

Author's notes: Dun dun DUN.

Someone told me in a review for the previous chapter, that there isn't enough Gruvia in the story. Well, as pointed out, my main couple is NaLu, even though I will do all the others as well. So just calm down and don't rush me. All in due time, since I have plans for everything already. Rome wasn't built in a day.

Anyways, I hope you guys liked this, and put it into some communities if you can.

What are your thoughts about it? Let me know in a review, since I read all of them.

~With keys, through flames! Aye!~