BROTHER ON BOARD
BedofRoses1989 - The calm chapters always lead up to action packed ones. You'll see more of the Nami vs Bonnie dynamic at play in this chapter.
Psychochiken - You're going to have to wait to see what Luffy does. That's next chapter. But I've always thought that Zoro going up against the 100 bounty hunters in Whiskey Peak was one of his most badass moments. I didn't want to take it away from him.
Guest - Thanks. Here's more.
The Patient One - I consciously made sure to write Miss in this chapter. I also went back and fixed the 'Miss.' from the last two chapters. Thanks for pointing that out.
Lightsbane1905 - Only one problem with Sugar's Hobby Hobby Fruit being responsible for Bonnie's spirit being trapped in the rifle... rifles aren't toys. Plus, it would take a really, really, really long time for that to come to fruition. I want to do more with Bonnie before i get to that point.
Bluejay Blaze - Don't think too hard about a potential artist. They're closer than you think.
rasEnshur1KEn - Nami has shown time and time again that she is the single most terrifying character in One Piece. I'm really am willing to bet that even Roger would be intimidated by her while she's on an angry rampage. We'll just have to see what happens during Little Garden.
Fairy of the Friz - Hey, I've been avoiding using Gun Puns in this story so far. But you're lucky. If you had reviewed an hour earlier I would have sent you a silly pirate joke to celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day.
Lunapok - Sabo will have some focus in this chapter but it's still going to be Zoro-centric. Zoro may have proven to be a great Bossy Boatswain... but now he'll have a chance to do what he truly does best while he takes on Baroque Works.
Miqila - I don't know if 'Bossy Bosun' is going to be Zoro's official nickname but it certainly is catching on. I guess I/Sabo made the right call with Zoro's new position. But Zoro will always be the Pirate Hunter and this chapter shows why.
Whiskey Peak-
The Going Merry sailed inland along a waterway. Cactus Island was shrouded in a thick blanket of fog that obscured almost everything.
"Do we really have to land here?" Usopp asked nervously, "This place gives me the creeps. I think I'm getting a bout of the dreaded Better-Not-Go-On-This-Island disease."
Sabo took a big step away from the Master Gunner. "That had better not be contagious. I'm not letting your disease keep me from going on an adventure."
"Yeah Usopp, keep your germs to yourself!" Luffy chimed in, "This is the first island in the Grand Line! We've gotta explore it!"
Zoro, Nami, Sanji and even Usopp stared dumb-founded at the two brothers.
"You two do realize that he's just being a chicken, right?" Sanji asked.
"I'm not taking any chances," Sabo insisted.
KER-CHOW!
Bonnie went off which caused her to recoil and smacked Sabo upside the head.
WHAK!
"Ow…" Sabo grumbled. "Maybe I should load you with some of those rubber bullets…"
"Listen guys… and evil rifle-dwelling spirit," Nami addressed everyone, "We have to land on this island. The Log Pose needs time to reset so it can log the magnetic field for the next island. I'm not sure how long that's going to take. It could be hours… it could be days. But we're stuck here until it's done."
"So… if there are monsters… we won't be able to run away?" Usopp whimpered.
"Don't worry about monsters," Luffy reassured him, "We'll worry about that stuff when it happens."
"Don't worry, Nami-swan, I'll protect you!" Sanji vowed.
"Yeah, sure, thanks, whatever," Nami said as she waved him off. Her eyes were still on the Log Pose.
"Hey guys, quiet down," Zoro instructed. "I thought I heard something but I can barely make it out over you guys… I think there are people out there in the fog…"
"People? Really?" Luffy questioned, "This fog's too thick to see any…"
"Actually… I think it's finally starting to thin," Nami pointed out.
The fog did thin… and revealed a crowd of nearly a hundred smiling villagers.
"WELCOME!"
"WELCOME PIRATES!"
"WELCOME TO THE GRAND LINE!"
"WELCOME TO OUR TOWN!"
"WELCOME TO WHISKEY PEAK!"
"WELCOME PIRATES… HEROES OF THE SEAS!"
The Straw Hats all marveled at the crowd. It appeared as though the entire village had turned up to welcome them to Whiskey Peak.
"Well… this is an interesting change of pace," Sabo remarked, "They certainly seem… welcoming."
"Of course…" replied a large man carrying a saxophone. He was dressed in a fancy suit with his white hair in rollers that resembled a British Parliament Wig. He cleared his throat and sang a few notes, "MAH-MAH-MAAA! This is Whiskey Peak… the Town of Welcome! I'm the Mayor Igarappoi and please allow me to welcome you brave travelers to our lovely town."
"Shishishishi…" Luffy laughed as he eyed the Mayor's curly hair, "That guy's hair is funny.
"Okay… I was not expecting this…" Sanji admitted.
"Whiskey Peak is a town of liquor and music," Mayor Igarappoi explained, "We pride ourselves on our hospitality above all else. You brave souls have done what many before you have failed to accomplish… you made it to the Grand Line. Please, allow us to throw a banquet in your honor."
"Wow… a banquet? REALLY!?" Luffy exclaimed.
"Do you see some of those beautiful women in the crowd?" Sanji gasped. "This is great!"
"Hmm… usually we have the party after we save the island…" Sabo mused.
"Well I'm not complaining," Usopp told him, "I'd prefer a crowd of welcoming well-wishers calling us 'brave travelers' over an island full of monsters any day!"
"You'd be surprised…" Zoro whispered to himself as he eyed the crowd cautiously.
"So I take it you're interested?" Igarappoi inquired.
"YOU BET!" Luffy, Sabo, Usopp and Sanji all cheered and raced off the Going Merry.
Zoro hung back while Nami rolled her eyes, "idiots…" She turned to the Mayor, "Actually… I wanted to ask you something about the Log Pose…
"Log?" Igarappoi repeated. "You can worry about trivial things like that in the morning. It's getting late, why don't you celebrate with us tonight? Everyone! Prepare a banquet for our guests!"
"RIGHT! LET'S PARTY!"
And so as the sun set and night fell, lively music sounded throughout Whiskey Peak as the villagers kicked off their Welcome Banquet for the Straw Hat Pirates. The festivities were being held in a large tavern where the Straw Hats were the center of attention. A large band had gathered in one corner and was playing music for their guests. Mayor Iggarappoi had even joined in for a time and played his saxophone along with the band. The bar was fully stocked with countless barrels and bottles of liquor while dozens of steaming plates began to make their way out of the kitchen.
"WOOOW! YOU MEAN I CAN EAT ALL THIS?" Luffy exclaimed as he stared at a heaping tray of meat.
"Of course," the smiling cook replied, "Eat as much as you like…" He would regret those words.
Usopp was nearby standing on a table loudly telling somewhat exaggerated tales of their adventure getting to the Grand Line. "So there we were in the Calm Belt… surrounded by all sorts of enormous monsters… I even fell overboard and looked death in the face… BUT I ESCAPED AT THE LAST SECOND BECAUSE I'M CAPTAIN UUUSOOOOPP!"
"Yeeaah!" the crowd around him cheered. "CAPTAIN USOPP'S SO BRAVE!"
"Oh Sanji, you're so charming!" a woman swooned.
"Ladies, ladies, enough about me," Sanji told the two women on his arms as they sat down at a booth in the corner. "Why don't you tell me about yourselves? You've been living here in the Grand Line and have no doubt encountered many travelers. I want to know about you."
"Here, try this…" Igarappoi instructed Nami as he offered the Navigator a mug of grog. "It's our special blend made from our bountiful grape harvest this year."
"I really shouldn't," Nami tried to wave him off, "I've got a ship to sail in the morning…"
"But we're celebrating the excellent grape harvest with our annual drinking contest," the Mayor informed her. "And there's a grand prize of fifty thousand berri!"
KA-CHING!
"Alright, you're on!" Nami exclaimed as she snatched the mug and drank it down.
"Eh-hem," Igarappoi cleared his throat then loudly sang out, "MAH-MAH-MAAA! THEN LET THE DRINKING CONTEST… BEGIN!"
"YEAH!" the large crowd of villagers gathered around the couches cheered as they raised their mugs and drank along with Nami.
Nearby, Zoro and Sabo were seated together at the bar.
Zoro eyed the blonde next to him. He glanced at the tea cup in the Quartermaster's hand which for some reason had the pinky extended. "Since when do you drink tea?"
"I drink tea all the time," Sabo insisted, "You just haven't noticed."
"Hmmm…" Zoro grunted as he scanned his memories… somehow his alcohol fueled mind allowed him to focus on details that he hadn't noticed before.
Shells Town… he had been caught up in stuffing his face and guzzling booze after being starved for so long. Luffy had matched him plate for plate. Sabo had eaten a modest two plates' worth of food… and had been drinking from a tea cup.
After they beat Buggy... Luffy had stuffed himself, Zoro had a drinking contest, Nami drank on her own, Sabo held court and told stories from the battle… while slowly nursing a cup of tea.
When they met Usopp… he'd taken them to a restaurant. They had talked about Sabo's gun and Zoro's swords. Zoro drank from a bottle… Sabo had a tea cup.
Then there were the days they'd worked on the Baratie. They took their meals in the staff kitchen with the rest of the cooks. Luffy complained every meal about not getting seconds… or thirds. Usopp never complained because he was terrified of the Head Chef. Zoro had been content with his booze while Sabo had sampled the house blend tea with ice in it.
After Arlong Park… Zoro drank, Luffy ate, Sanji flirted, Usopp told stories and Sabo… screwed Nami's sister… that seemed to overshadow anything else the Quartermaster might have done or drank over the course of that party.
"Huh… so you have," Zoro noted. "I guess your drink preferences never mattered to me."
"Says the guy who drinks booze with breakfast, lunch and dinner," Sabo retorted. "I drink booze when we're celebrating. But I try to set an example for Luffy by drinking something a little classier. You know how impulsive he is when he's sober… trust me, you don't want to see him drunk."
"Hey! Don't hold out on us!" Nami complained as she climbed onto the bar stool on Sabo's other side. The Navigator had a slight flush in her cheeks from her still ongoing drinking contest. "If you've got a potentially embarrassing story about our Captain… then you're obligated to share it!"
"It's not so much embarrassing for him as it was for us," Sabo replied.
"SPILL IT!" Nami urged him while Zoro raised an eyebrow expectantly.
"Okay, fine," Sabo conceded, "I suppose it can serve as a cautionary tale. It all started when Ace and I thought it would be funny if we got Luffy drunk. We figured he'd get wasted, trip over himself and make stupid decisions. We had our matching tattoos as keepsakes from the first time we got drunk. We thought Luffy would do something similar. Well… talk about your all-time backfires. First of all, he's a lightweight. Do not let him have more than one cup of booze… ever! Because when Luffy gets drunk… his low inhibitions get even lower and his hands start to wander. Keep in mind that the arms those hands are attached to can stretch… and you've got an inebriated groper that you can't escape from. This led to an extremely awkward night in our treehouse that Ace and I still don't like to talk about."
Both Zoro and Nami's eyes widened.
"Since that night, Ace and I swore to never let him get drunk again," Sabo stated, "We encouraged his abstinence from alcohol by staying away from it ourselves. Luckily, Luffy likes eating way more than he cares about drinking so he barely noticed. But you have now been warned. Do not let him get drunk. Luffy doesn't care who or what he grabs. He just does. And there's no escaping him short of jumping out a window… but even then… he'll catch you and drag you back in… and…"
Sabo trailed off and shivered. Zoro and Nami looked across the room at Luffy who was standing over a cook who had passed out from exhaustion.
"MORE FOOD!" the rubber pirate shouted.
"What… but the cook's unconscious!" a nearby man protested.
"And I'm still hungry!" Luffy insisted, "Find another one!"
"Right, so no getting Luffy drunk," Sabo resolved.
"I'll drink to that," Zoro agreed. He raised his mug and Sabo knocked his tea cup against it. Then they both looked over at Nami.
"Weeell…" she said teasingly. They both glared at her. "Okay, okay, spoilsports, no getting Luffy drunk." Nami brought her mug up and knocked it against Sabo's tea cup and Zoro's mug then they all took a drink sealing the agreement.
"By the way… this tea tastes a little strange," Sabo remarked, "What kind is it?"
"That's our signature brand of Misty Peak blend tea," Mayor Igarappoi informed him. "We grow the leaves here and make it especially for our guests."
"Hmm… it's not bad," Sabo admitted. "Just different than the blends I'm used to."
"Well by all means, enjoy," the Mayor urged him.
The party continued and the booze and food continued to flow as the villagers flocked around the Straw Hat Pirates. Sanji now had six women sitting with him in his booth in the corner. Usopp had stacked another chair on top of his table as he continued to share his stories. The second cook that was serving Luffy looked like he'd just run a marathon. Nami had a cluster of 'victims' around her that she had bested in the drinking contest. Zoro had a collection of eight empty mugs in front of him.
Sabo was on his third cup of tea when a nun sat down on the stool next to him. "You seem to be slowing down," she noted, "Care to have a drink with me?"
Sabo blinked in surprise. "A nun that drinks?"
"You've clearly still got a lot to learn about the Grand Line," the nun remarked. "Nothing is as it seems. The people here in Whiskey Peak they call me 'the Sister' and I'm the best drinker in town."
"Wow…" Sabo replied. "Well… I don't really drink. And uh… just in case you don't follow other traditional 'nun' practices… I should probably state for the record that I'm spoken for." He looked back over his left shoulder and smiled fondly at the rifle strapped to his back.
"Oh, good grief," Zoro groaned from next to him. "Here he goes again…"
The Sister had followed Sabo's line of sight and had disregarded the rifle on the blonde man's back like any normal rational person would. Instead, her eyes met the green-haired man on Sabo's left side.
"Oh my!" the Sister gasped, "How shameful!"
The immediate area grew quiet. Sabo and Zoro both froze. "What?"
"I didn't realize you were… those kinds of pirates," the Sister confessed.
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" a delightfully drunk Nami fell out of her seat laughing. "OH THAT'S PRICELESS! HAHAHAHAHA! NO WONDER YOU GUYS ARGUE ALL THE TIME! IT'S FOREPLAY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Sabo and Zoro were both now sporting faint blushes.
"You fix this!" Zoro growled, "Fix it now!"
"Whoa, okay, hold on!" Sabo said, "Despite anything that you may have overheard about that time my brother got drunk… I'm not gay. I'll have you know that I'm in a committed heterosexual relationship… with my rifle." Sabo took Bonnie off his back and hugged her to his chest.
"Riiiight…" the highly skeptical nearby people chorused.
"I don't know Sabo," Nami called out as she climbed back onto the couch. "You and your girlfriend did sleep with my sister… I can't imagine that Bonnie's completely straight after that either. Now it looks like you're going after Zoro to try the other kind of three-way! You two really are perfect for each other!"
Sabo flushed while Bonnie Anne went off and fired an orange bullet across the room.
KER-CHOW! BOING!
The rubber round bounced off of the far wall then came flying back and slammed into Nami and knocked the girl off her seat again.
THUD!
"YOU BITCH!" Nami yelled from the ground. "I'M STILL DRINKING! THAT DOESN'T COUNT!"
Zoro grabbed Sabo's shoulder and glared at him, "You're not gay?"
"Well… I can only speak for myself," Sabo stated, "I don't know which way your swords swing…"
"What that supposed to mean?" Zoro challenged him.
"Earlier today, you screamed in the face of the only girl that took an interest in your sword hoarding," Sabo reminded him. "She even learned all their names. And then there's the fact that you keep putting one of them in your mouth. What's that supposed to be an oral fixation?"
"You're in no position to judge other people's relationships, you rifle-rubbing freak!" Zoro snapped.
"Hey, easy!" Sabo objected, "I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that. I still see you as the same booze guzzling, sword stroking mossball."
"I don't think I like drinking with you anymore," Zoro stated.
"Same here," Sabo retorted. "So I'm going to leave and take my girlfriend and spend a quiet night out under the stars. You can stay here and do whatever it is that you do."
Sabo promptly got up and walked out of the tavern. Zoro glared after him then went back to his drink.
"They're a rather rowdy bunch of pirates, aren't they?" Mayor Igarappoi remarked to the Sister from the corner they'd both retreated to when Bonnie had fired the rubber round at Nami.
"That one escaped," the Sister pointed out, "Do you want me to go after him?"
"No, he won't get far… I upped to dose in his tea to the point that he could taste it," the Mayor stated, "Contact Mr. 9 and Miss Wednesday. He's the one responsible for them failing their mission. I'm sure they'd enjoy the opportunity to take him out."
Oblivious to the cryptic conversation in the corner, Luffy pulled a meatless bone out of his mouth and turned to his Master Gunner who was standing on top of the table next to him. "Hey Usopp, what does 'gay' mean?"
"Oh no, I'm not touching that one," Usopp insisted, "Sanji, you're the Love Cook, you explain it to him."
"I thought Sabo had to field the awkward questions," Sanji grumbled as he sat up in between the multiple women that were sitting on both sides of him in the booth in the corner. "Luffy, that's what Sabo would be if Bonnie was a boy rifle instead of a girl rifle. Sexual preference is a matter of the type of person that you're attracted to. I personally love the ladies. They're much prettier, are more sensitive and are softer to the touch."
Luffy blinked then looked over at Nami. The only 'lady' around his age that he knew was knocking back another mug of grog as she drank five full grown men under the table. "Nami's loud and hits hard…"
"All women are different Luffy," Sanji told him, "Nami-swan might not be demure and quiet like a lot of women but that's because of her upbringing, her profession as a pirate and that she's highly passionate. Romance is about finding the type of person that you like best and who is the best fit for you."
"Oh Sanji!" cooed one of Sanji's admirers, "You should have said you wanted a passionate woman!"
"Hahahaha!" the cook let out a blissful laugh, "This place is paradise!"
Luffy shrugged and turned his attention to more important matters… like the meatless bone in his hand. "I FINISHED THIS! MORE MEAT!"
"But we just lost the second cook!" a man protested.
"Then find a third one!" Luffy instructed. "MORE!"
"Talk about hospitality," Sabo remarked as he made his way down the main street of Whiskey Peak with Bonnie Anne slung over his shoulder. "The streets are completely empty. It looks like everyone in town is at the tavern welcoming the crew." Sabo blinked. "Does that seem suspicious to you?"
KER-CHOW!
"Hmmm…" Sabo blearily mumbled as he blinked his increasingly heavy eyelids. "Well… we've been lucky today so far. The Marines let us go in Loguetown… We escaped the Sea Kings in the Calm Belt… We made it into the Grand Line and everybody got swallowed by Laboon."
Click!
"Oh, no, that's was lucky," Sabo insisted. His speech was starting to slur. "'Cause y'see… we helped Laboon… and… otherwise he'd've died 'cause 'f the head wounds… or the whale hunterers… And… and… wewould've died… 'cause… cuzzz… we wouldn't've known about needin' a Log Pose. All that crazy Grand Line weather 'n' stuff woulda killed us ferrr shurrre…"
Sabo let out a yawn then dropped to his knees and leaned back against a nearby building. He held his bullet-spitting girlfriend in his lap.
"Bonnie… I… um… think our luck might've run out…" he confessed as he yawned again and blearily blinked his eyes. "There was somethin' funny 'bout that tea… Dr. Flower-guy said… bounty hunters… and… and the sword-hoarder said…"
FWUMP!
The Quartermaster dropped to the ground with his rifle cuddled against his chest. "Baroque Works…"
"Ugh…" Zoro groaned and passed out with his head on the counter and a collection of twelve empty mugs around him.
Luffy flopped on his back. His belly was swelled up like a balloon and there were three unconscious cooks lying on stretchers near the kitchen.
"This place… is heaven… it's a paradise…" Sanji mumbled. He'd fallen into a Love Coma and was lying across the lap of four different ladies in the corner.
"The Grand Line is great!" Usopp exclaimed as he sat down on the towering stack of three chairs that he'd piled on top of his table. "I'm just… gonna rest my eyes…" Truthfully, the sniper was a little scared of climbing down from the rickety structure that he'd created. So he decided to just pass out in his chair and worry about getting down in morning.
Nami was the last one standing. The Drinking Contest had come down to the Straw Hats Navigator and the Sister. Both women were nearing their twentieth mug when the nun dropped to the floor.
"No more… you win…" the Sister moaned as she passed out.
"YEAH! I WIN!" Nami exclaimed. Her face was flushed as she finished off her twentieth mug of grog.
"And here are your winnings," Mayor Igarappoi announced as he handed her the sack of prize money.
"EEE!" Nami squealed in glee as she hugged the money to her chest… then passed out on a couch.
Mayor Igarappoi smirked as he stood in the corner and surveyed the sleeping Straw Hat Crew. The music stopped and the villagers filed out of the tavern leaving the pirates lying scattered around the room.
"They've finally fallen asleep…" the Mayor observed, "Sweet dreams brave adventurers." He turned and followed the other villagers out of the tavern. "The cactus rocks are beautiful when they shine in the moonlight…"
"Was there really a point to all that, Mr. 8?" the Mayor turned to see the Sister come out of the tavern. "It seems like a waste to use so many of our resources on a crew that's this small and has no bounties. We're not getting any money out of this… and we didn't get any whale meat… why didn't we just ambush them at the harbor and save ourselves the trouble?"
"Only a fool judges pirates by their initial appearance, Miss Monday," Mr. 8 replied. "The Captain has Devil Fruit Powers. Not only that, but I found an article about those pirates in yesterday's newspaper. This crew was responsible for bringing down all the big names in the East Blue. The fact that there are only six of them speaks wonders for their true strength."
"Hmm… you may have a point," Miss Monday admitted, "The last Devil Fruit User that we faced used his abilities to take out ten of our best bounty hunters before I managed to throw him in the water." The Sister grabbed the collar of her nun outfit and tore it off. Her dark skin, red hair and large hulking muscles were revealed and even enhanced by the tight red and white checkered dress she was wearing.
"There's also the fact that they know about our organization," Mr. 8 added, "Not only that… but they actually know its name. Our organization's motto is 'mystery' and we can't risk allowing any pirates to venture further into the Grand Line while knowing that it exists."
"Still the same old Baroque Works."
Mr. 8 and Miss Monday whirled around and saw Zoro sitting on top of the tavern. He had his sword Wado Ichimonji drawn which caused the blade to gleam in the moonlight.
A man in a cowboy hat ran out of the tavern, "MR. 8! MISS MONDAY! ONE OF THE PIRAETS ESCAPED!"
"We're aware of that, you fool!" Miss Monday spat at him.
"What're you doing up there!" Mr. 8 barked up at Zoro, "You were passed out just a moment ago."
"I true swordsman never allows his senses to be impaired by alcohol," Zoro retorted, "Especially not when he's in the middle of a den of bounty hunters."
The previously harmless looking villagers began to gather around Mr. 8 and Miss Monday outside the tavern. Only now, they were wielding guns, knives, swords and various other weapons. Everyone in town had been on hand to welcome the pirates… and everyone in town was a bounty hunter.
"So this is how your organization runs, huh?" Zoro noted, "You ambush overconfident rookie pirates when they're arriving in the Grand Line for the first time and then cash in on their bounties."
"How do you know the name of our organization?" Mr. 8 demanded.
"I used to be in the same line of work as you guys," Zoro admitted, "And during that time your organization contacted me and tried to recruit me. Let's see if I remember correctly… you're an organization of criminals that all use codenames to hide your true identities. You don't know anything about each other and you know even less about your mysterious boss that's pulling all the strings." Zoro's mouth spread into a predatory shark-like grin, "Does that sound about right?"
"There are a hundred bounty hunters in this village," Mr. 8 stated, "Mark my words, by the end of this night… you and your crew will merely be six more tombstones on the Cactus Rocks." Mr. 8 raised his saxophone and brought it to his lips then blew a loud note. "IGARAPPA!"
BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!
Bullets shot out from the rollers in Mr. 8 curled hair… but they passed through empty air. The roof of the tavern was vacant. Zoro had vanished.
"FIND HIM!" Mr. 8 yelled to the other Baroque Works Agents, "HE'S ONLY ONE SWORDSMAN! HUNT HIM DOWN AND BRING HIS BODY TO ME!"
The one hundred bounty hunters split up and fanned out to search the town.
Zoro smirked as he leaned against the wall of a nearby alleyway, "One hundred bounty hunters, huh?" The swordsman glanced down at the two blades sheathed on his sash, "This seems like the perfect opportunity to test out my new swords…"
"Keep your eyes peeled for any sign of him," Miss Wednesday instructed as she and her partner Mr. 9 rode a large yellow duck the size of a small horse through Whiskey Peak. "That goes for you too, Carue."
"QUACK!" replied Carue the Super Spot-Billed Duck as he used his wing to fire off a quick salute.
"The town's been quiet so far," Mr. 9 mused. "Mr. 8 probably pulled the old Welcome Banquet trick. There's a chance that he might be asleep somewhere…"
"QUAA!" Carue called out and pointed towards a figure that was lying in the road next to a building with a rifle cuddled against his chest.
"Good eye, Carue," Miss Wednesday praised her steed. "There he is!"
"Let's take him out now before he has a chance to wake up," Mr. 9 suggested.
"Right, Mr. 9," Miss Wednesday agreed as she pulled two jewels that looked like peacock feathers out of her sleeves. The jewels had sharp edges and were on a pair of thin chains that ended with rings that she slipped onto one finger on each hand. "PEACOCK… STRING…" Miss Wednesday swung bladed jewels around on their chains and prepared to let them fly. "SLA—"
Fortunately for Sabo, he had someone looking out for him at that moment… which was unfortunate for the two unsuspecting Baroque Works Agents.
KER-CHOW!
"QUUUAAA!" Carue squawked in terror as Bonnie Anne went off on her own and fired an orange round. He jumped back and flapped his wings in fright.
BOING!
The orange bullet bounced off of a building across the alley and struck the startled duck in the side.
BAM!
The Super Spot-Billed Duck was knocked over which caused his two passengers to go flying.
"Carue! Are you okay?" Miss Wednesday called out in concern for her steed.
"What happened?" Mr. 9 wondered as he pushed himself up off the ground, "He should be sleeping…" The Baroque Works Agent pulled out a steel baseball bat and eyed the sleeping pirate and the rifle that he had seemingly fired in his sleep. "I'll handle this myself…" Mr. 9 launched himself through the air with an impressive flip.
FWIP!
The Baroque Works Agent swung his bat up overhead and prepared to put Sabo to sleep for good. Bonnie Anne didn't seem to like that idea and fired again.
KER-CHOW!
Bonnie's orange bullet shot off and bounced off of a wall across the alley.
BOING!
Then it came back and knocked the acrobatic agent right out of the air.
BAM!
"MISTER NINE!" Miss Wednesday cried out in alarm as her partner went crashing to the ground. "WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?" She glared at the sleeping pirate, who, in her rational mind, could be the only one responsible for what had happened. "DANDY MAN! QUIT PLAYING POSSUM!"
"Uuh… okay, okay… I'm up… I'm up…" Sabo slowly dragged himself up enough that he could prop himself against the building. "What's all the noise about?"
"Wait… you were sleeping?" Miss Wednesday sputtered.
Sabo blearily opened his eyes and smacked his lips as he tried to come to grips with the situation, "Something… tastes funny… OH! The curly-haired jerk drugged the tea." Sabo finally turned his attention to Miss Wednesday, "Which would mean… you're here to kill me."
"I… how… HOW DID YOU FIRE YOUR GUN IN YOUR SLEEP!?" Miss Wednesday demanded.
"She fired while I was sleeping?" Sabo questioned. He turned his head and spotted Mr. 9 lying on the ground clutching his chest. "Oh, WOW! Way to go, Bonnie!" He raised his rifle and kissed the nozzle. "Best girlfriend ever! Thanks for looking out for me."
"Did you say girlfriend?" Miss Wednesday repeated. "That's just a rifle."
"Oh no, Bonnie's not just a rifle," Sabo assured her, "She an Advanced Wheel-lock Rifle with an added scope and custom revolving action. But she's also so much more. Like, for example, my girlfriend."
"That's not—" Sabo cut her off.
"What else would you call a dedicated woman that looks out for you and defends you from a pair of cowardly two-bit crooks looking to take a cheap shot and kill you in your sleep?"
Miss Wednesday glared at him.
"What was it that Zoro called you earlier?" Sabo asked out loud as pushed off the wall but remained sitting on the ground as he stared down the two agents. "Baroque Works, right? Well… Baroque Works… I'm wide awake… and now you've got my full attention."
"First up… Yubashiri…" Zoro announced as he drew his new blade while ducked behind a table to avoid a hail of gunfire from a group of bounty hunters that had cornered him in a house.
The gunfire stopped and Zoro quickly vaulted over the table and slashed Yubashiri at the seven men standing ahead of him.
SLIKA-SLICE!
Zoro landed behind the group of bounty hunters and eyed Yubashiri as the seven men dropped to the grounds with cuts going across their chest.
"Hmm… Yubashiri… nice and light," Zoro remarked as he dashed out of the house and began to climb up a nearby ladder.
"Ha-ha! FOUND HIM!" a bounty hunter exclaimed as he stood on the roof Zoro was climbing up to with three companions. The bounty hunter had a bazooka on his shoulder and opened fire. "EAT THIS!"
BOOOM!
FWIP!
Zoro flipped backwards and laid flat on the ladder as the cannonball whizzed over him and exploded when it impacted with the ground below.
The swordsman shook his head as he righted himself and began to climbed up the ladder once more. Thus far these one hundred Baroque Works bounty hunters hadn't been anything to write home about. But they seemed to make up for their lack of individual skill with their sheer numbers.
There was however… one standout…
"RAAAHH!" Miss Monday roared as she threw at full barrel of grog at Zoro from the next roof over.
"KILL HIM!" one of the four bounty hunters shouted as they all drew swords and advanced on Zoro as he reached the top of the ladder.
Zoro looked back over his shoulder and saw the incoming barrel. He lashed out behind him with Yubashiri and used his blade to slice through Miss Monday's wooden projectile.
SLISH-SLISH-SLISH!
While a heavier blade would have been able to effectively cleave the barrel in half… Yubashiri's light weight made so that Zoro was able to slash the blade three times instead of just once. The barrel split into four quarters instead of two halves and sprayed grog everywhere as the pieces flew over Zoro and knocked out the four sword-wielding bounty hunters.
WHAK-WAK-WAK-WAK!
"Grrr… why you!" Miss Monday growled as she glared at Zoro from the next roof over as he finished climbing the ladder and admired his sword.
"Not bad, Yubashiri," Zoro remarked, "You're a fine blade indeed."
"RAAAH!" a new bounty hunter charged at Zoro from behind with a stone mallet raised overhead.
Zoro quickly drew Kitetsu III and swung the blade to block the mallet.
SLISH!
But instead of merely blocking the stone mallet… the cursed blade hadcleaved straight through it.
Zoro spun and used Yubashiri to cut down the bounty hunter while he admired Kitetsu III.
SLASH!
"Hmm… this one was sharp enough to cut through stone," Zoro noted, "But a great sword should only cut when its wielder wishes it to." Zoro gave the cursed blade a stern look, "I can tell now that you're going to be a problem child."
Thankfully, Sabo wasn't around to hear Zoro praising and lecturing his new swords.
"Whoa! What is that thing!?" Sabo exclaimed as he stared passed Miss Wednesday at Carue.
"That thing," Miss Wednesday growled, "Is a Super Spot-Billed Duck named Carue."
"Do ducks grow that big?" Sabo questioned, "Are you sure he's not some kind of ostrich?"
"Yes, I'm sure!" Miss Wednesday snapped.
"And what makes it a Super Spot-Billed Duck versus just a regular duck?" Sabo inquired.
"His large size, high speed and the spot on his bill," Miss Wednesday answered crisply. "And unlike your so-called girlfriend… he is a living, breathing creature. He's also one of the fastest animals in the world."
"Really?" Sabo replied, "Because he looks a little slow…"
Miss Wednesday bristled at Sabo's cold comments about her pet. "COME ON, CARUE! We need to teach this pirate a lesson! Show him your speed that puts a cheetah's to shame!"
"QUAAA!" Carue crowed. Miss Wednesday hopped up onto his back and charged at Sabo who didn't move from here he was sitting on the ground. He simply raised his gun and fired.
KER-CHOW!
"QUUAAAAACK!" Carue shrieked in alarm and practically flew up off of the ground as Sabo's bullet shot between his legs.
THUD!
Miss Wednesday was once again thrown off her duck while Carue ran off like his tail was on fire.
ZZZZOOOM!
"Wow… I guess he is fast," Sabo remarked, "But are you sure he's a duck and not a chicken?"
"WHY YOU!" Miss Wednesday yelled. "HE IS A DUCK! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL!"
"Okay… he's a duck, "Sabo admitted, "But he's very incompetent one. I guess good help is hard to find." Sabo grinned and kissed the side of Bonnie's barrel, "That's why I'm glad I've got you, babe."
"Miss Wednesday, you need to calm down!" Mr. 9 called out in a warning, "He's trying to distract you." Mr. 9 stood up and pointed his baseball bat at Sabo, "Why don't you stand up and fight like a man?"
"…" Sabo glanced down at his legs, "Uh… I'm good. But I would hardly call you a man, pansy-who-pretends-to-be-a-King."
Mr. 9 smirked, "As I thought, he's stalling for time. You're not standing… because you can't stand. Whatever Mr. 8 used to knock you out must still be in your system!"
"I guess the cat's out of the bag," Sabo confessed. "But if you want to brag about your keen detective skills for another couple of minutes… feel free."
"I think I'll just kill you now!" Mr. 9 retorted as he launched himself towards Sabo with a series of flip. "HOT BLOODED BAT OF GUTS!"
Sabo raised his rifle up over his head to block the incoming strike from Mr. 9's bat.
WHAK!
"NOW I'VE GOT YOU!" Mr. 9 exclaimed as he swung a second bat at Sabo's face.
Fwump! WHISH!
Sabo fell on his back and Mr. 9 was thrown off balance when his swing whizzed right over his target. Sabo popped back up and jammed the handle of his rifle into Mr. 9's unprotected stomach. The crowned man doubled over and Sabo quickly followed up by swinging his rifle up into Mr. 9's face.
WHAM!
Mr. 9 was launched up into the air and his body did a backflip before he crashed down to the ground behind Miss Wednesday.
"You didn't shoot him," Miss Wednesday noted. She had finally calmed down enough to think rationally. "That must mean you're out of bullets."
"Actually I've still got one left," Sabo replied, "But there's two of you… so you're gonna have to share."
"Mr. 9 made the mistake of charging in and challenging you directly," Miss Wednesday commented, "Even if you can't stand… you're still stronger than the two of us. That's why I'm not coming any closer. I'm done letting you get in my head… now it's time for me to get in yours."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Sabo wondered.
Miss Wednesday pulled out a small bottle and sprayed herself with it then slowly began to sway her hips back and forth. "PERFUME DANCE!"
"What are you doing?" Sabo asked but then he was suddenly assaulted by a strong flowery scent. "GAH!" Bonnie dropped onto his lap as he clamped his hands over his nose. But he suddenly became much more aware of Miss Wednesday's long blue hair as it swung back and forth with each movement. "Blue's my favorite color…" Sabo attempted to avert his gaze but he suddenly found himself looking down at the Baroque Work's Agent's generous chest and noticed the spiral pattern on each of her breasts as well as her thin stomach.
"That's it…" Miss Wednesday whispered as she noticed her entrancing attack beginning to have a measure of success. She continued to sway her hips back and forth which caused the spirals one her top to swing back and forth and heightened the hypnotic effect.
"No… don't look at… her chest…" Sabo growled as he gritted his teeth and forced his gaze lower. But now he was looking at her swaying hips… and her incredibly short white shorts which bared most of her long toned legs. "I… uh… were those shorts always that tight?"
Sabo's hands dropped limply to his sides and he was left staring straight ahead in a trance.
"Got him," Miss Wednesday boasted.
"HE'S CLIMBING AGAIN!"
Zoro raced up another ladder with at least a dozen bounty hunters chasing after him. But as soon as he reached the roof he lashed out and kicked the ladder away.
THWAK!
"WAAH!" the bounty hunters screamed as the ladder they were climbing swung across the main road.
SKISH!
Zoro leapt off of roof and landed on the top of the swinging ladder then launched himself off of it.
SKISH!
Zoro flew high overhead while the ladder split in half and went crashing down… bringing the dozen bounty hunters with it.
KRASH!
Zoro looked ahead of him and saw a new cluster of bounty hunters on the roof he was about to land on. He quickly raised Yubashiri and Kitetsu III and crossed them over his chest as he prepared to land. "Nitoryu… TAKANAMI!"
SLA-SLISH!
Ten bounty hunters screamed and flying which suddenly left the roof clear.
Zoro smirked as he embedded the tip of Kitetsu III in the roof and cut a circle around him.
"YAAHAA!" a bounty hunter shouted as he and four others came leaping up onto the roof.
Zoro casually stepped out of the way which allowed the bounty hunters land in the spot he'd just been standing in.
KRASH!
The roof gave way and the bounty hunters went crashing down into the house below.
"There's a hole there," Zoro pointed out post humorously, "You'd better watch out."
A large shadow suddenly fell over Zoro.
SWISH!
The swordsman dropped to the ground just in time to avoid Miss Monday as she swung half of the broken ladder and smashed it against another part of the roof.
KROOSH!
"That was close…" Zoro muttered as he rolled over onto his back. He looked up in time to see Miss Monday slip some brass knuckles onto her hand.
Whap!
Miss Monday pounced on Zoro and used her immense strength to pin the swordsman down on the roof while she raised her other fist up overhead. "SUPERHUMAN… KNUCKLE DUSTER!"
Miss Monday brought her fist down and smashed the brass knuckles down into Zoro's forehead.
KA-POW!
The roof cracked from the impact and Mr. 8 watched from the street with a smile on his face.
"How dare he make us waste so much time," the lead Baroque Works Agent complained.
"PEACOCK STRING…" Miss Wednesday swung her bladed jewels and sent them flying out at Sabo. "SNATCHER!"
WHAP!
But instead of slashing the entranced pirate… the jewel wrapped around the rifle on his lap and with a hard tug on the chains Miss Wednesday yanked Bonnie Anne away from her boyfriend.
KER-CHOW!
"Wha! BONNIE!" Sabo yelped as the gun shot brought him out of his trance. "I wasn't staring! She means nothing to me!"
Thunk!
Bonnie Anne slammed to the ground at Miss Wednesday's feet.
"You bitch…" Sabo growled as he pushed off of the ground and forced himself up to his feet. "You give her back right now… or I swear to God… I will tear you apart!"
Miss Wednesday flinched and took two steps backwards from the malice dripping in Sabo's voice. But she smirked when she felt something press into her back.
"I… you don't scare me!" Miss Wednesday bluffed. "You're unarmed. And even if you weren't… your gun just fired its last bullet. You can't do anything to me from all the way over there!"
Both Sabo and Miss Wednesday stared down at the rifle that way lying on the ground in front of the Baroque Works Agent.
"NOW MR. 9!" Miss Wednesday suddenly spun to the side and revealed her partner behind her.
"HOME-RUN… HIDE-A-BAT!"
BANG!
The top half of Mr. 9's steel bat fired at Sabo. The pirate was caught off guard by the double layered surprise attack and ended up bound by the steel chain that followed the bat as his wrapped around him.
"HAHA! GOT HIM!" Mr. 9 gloated as he pulled back on the chain and pinned Sabo's arms to his sides. "Finish him off Miss Wednesday!"
Sabo shook his head as Miss Wednesday charged at him while swinging her weapons at her side. "PEACOCK STRING…"
"When will you people learn not to hold onto the other end of the chain after binding someone that's stronger than you," Sabo grumbled as he lunged backwards which yanked Mr. 9 off of his feet.
"WAAH! LOOK OUT!" Mr. 9 shrieked went flying through the air and slammed into Miss Wednesday from behind.
WHAM!
Miss Wednesday was knocked off balance and nearly fell from her partner slamming into her. The chain around Sabo went slightly slack and he was able to grab onto the line attaching him to Mr. 9 and his bat.
Sabo grinned as he spun around and swung a screaming Mr. 9 passed him in a wide arc. "WAAAH!"
WHING!
Sabo kept spinning and swung Mr. 9 back the other way and smashed him into Miss Wednesday a second time.
KRASH!
Both Baroque Works Agents went flying and landed in a heap behind Bonnie Anne. They started to get back up but damage had already been done. The impact had caused Mr. 9 to lose his hold on his bat so Sabo's chain came completely loose and dropped to the ground by his feet.
SKISH!
Sabo leapt forward and dropped into a roll that saw him snatch Bonnie Anne up off of the ground and roll back up onto his feet in one smooth movement. He spun around and swung Bonnie Anne like a baseball bat, "KNOCK BACK!"
WHAAAM!
Sabo's rifle slammed into Mr. 9 and Mr. 9 collided with Miss Wednesday which caused the pair to go flying off into the night sky.
Twinkle!
"AND THEY'RE OUTTA HERE!" Sabo cheered. He raised Bonnie Anne and kissed the side of her nozzle. "Mwa, now that's what I call a home run. Thanks for having my back, Bonnie. You're the best."
"AAAUUUGGGGH!"
Mr. 8 went stiff when he heard the sound of a scream. But it wasn't Zoro's. It was Miss Monday's.
"Where's all that strength now, muscle woman?" Zoro taunted. He was bleeding from the forehead where Miss Monday had slugged him with her brass knuckles. All he'd done to retaliate was reach up, grab her forehead, and squeeze. The gap in strength between the muscular Baroque Works Agent and the Straw Hats' Boatswain was that immense.
"AAUUGGGGHH!" Miss Monday kept screaming to the point where she was foaming from the mouth. Zoro finally let go and she dropped limply to the ground.
"WHOA! HE BEAT MISS MONDAY IN A CONTEST OF STRENGTH!"
Zoro turned and found his new targets.
SLIKA-SLICE!
Two sword swings later the roof was clear again. He casually sheathed his two new blades and walked to the edge of the roof so he could peer down at Mr. 8.
"Is there anyone actually worth fighting in this town full of assassins?" he taunted. "Come on then, Baroque Works. I can keep going of you can."
"How disgraceful," Mr. 8 remarked, "For so many of our number to be defeated by a single swordsman. We were entrusted by the Boss to oversee this town. It's our responsibility to stop any pirates that come through… especially ones that learn about our organization. I" Mr. 8 raised his saxophone to his lips and blew into it. "IGARAPPA!"
BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!
"WHOA!" Zoro yelped as he dodged the bullets that Mr. 8 fired from his hair.
"IGARAPPA!" Mr. 8 kept fired another salvo of bullets just as Zoro landed.
BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!
SKISH!
Zoro launched himself off a roof and dove through a window into a house for cover.
"IGARAPPA!"
BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!
Mr. 8's bullets impacted with the front wall of the house.
"I've gotta get close to that guy in order to beat him," Zoro resolved as he crept down the stairs to the ground floor. "But that's gonna be tricky if he keeps firing bullets from his hair…"
"YOU'RE NOT SAFE IN THERE!" Mr. 8 bellowed from outside.
Zoro peered through the front window and saw Mr. 8 standing outside the building.
"Preparations complete!" Mr. 8 announced as he blew a different note in his saxophone.
CLICK-CLICK-CLICK!
"What the heck!?" Zoro yelped as six gun barrels popped out from the rollers in Mr. 8's wig.
"IGARAPPAPA!"
BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG!
The more powerful barrage of bullets blasted straight through the front wall of the house.
SKISH!
Zoro launched himself away from the stairs and ducked behind a table to avoid the hail of gunfire as the entire front wall of the house began to grumble.
"IGARAPPAPA!"
BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG!
"Shit! This isn't good!" Zoro cursed, "It's like that guy has six rifles. I need an opening if I want any hope of getting close enough to finish him off."
"THERE'S NO ESCAPE SWORDSMAN!" Mr. 8 shouted, "IGARA—"
The Baroque Works Agent trailed off when something caught the corner of his eye. He looked upward and saw Mr. 9 and Miss Wednesday come plummeting down out of the sky.
KRASH!
The two agents that Sabo had just beaten crashed through an awning of a market stall and smashed the boxes as they landed.
"PR-MISS WEDNESDAY!" Mr. 8 gasped as he stared at the blue haired woman in shock.
"There's my opening," Zoro realized as he drew Wado Ichimonji and launched himself out through the huge hole that Mr. 8 had blasted in the front of the house.
SLISH!
"UUGGH!" Mr. 8 groaned in pain as Zoro's sword slashed him across the chest.
"Now it's over," Zoro resolved as he stood over his fallen adversary. He raised his lone blade and smiled at it. "Wado Ichimonji… perfect as usual."
"Are you actually talkingto your sword? You know that's crazy, right?"
Zoro spun around and spotted the absolute last person that he wanted to catch him conversing with his swords. He definitely didn't like the wide shit-eating grin on the rifle-wielding Quartermaster's face.
Zoro flushed slightly and swore, "Aw fuck!"
Looks like Zoro's caught some of Sabo's weapon insanity.
Next chapter is the big Vivi reveal. Does anyone think that Sabo's gonna take it well?
Silver signing off