BROTHER ON BOARD
Guest - I think you meant hypocritical bigot. And yes, I agree. That's why Zoro called him out on it. But the point is that you can at least understand where he's coming from and his views and origin is now public and out in the open. Also, keep in mind that this is Sabo's first time off his island. I'm not going to make excuses for him. But simply put, all of Sabo's experiences with nobles and World Nobles have been bad. So that's colored his perception of them. There are two major character changing things that are going to happen to Sabo over the course of the Alabasta Saga. The first is Vivi eventually helping him to overcome his prejudice. I'll leave the second as a surprise.
Flux Casey - I haven't but after reading few summaries I may start. Seems interesting. You have a point about the epithet. The World Government would never call him 'Noble Pirate' no matter how well the Straw Hats are getting along with them at the time. But that nickname served its purpose by getting Sabo explain his origin story. I think that's an import part of showing why I'm writing Sabo this way.
Girlbook - Hopefully Sabo when encounters Wapol it won't undo any progress that Vivi has managed to make.
The Patient One - It's not so much the fear of heights. In chapter 23, Bonnie was fine in the Crow's Nest, sailing down Reverse Mountain and being thrown to save Nami from the figurehead. Its more an issue of falling from those heights at an extreme speed with no control over yourself. The lack of control is an especially important factor since she's trapped in a gun. Bonnie's origin is obvious to me but that's because I'm looking at it from an angle that most One Piece fans wouldn't. Yes, Flintstones. What else would you shout when surfing/sliding down a dinosaur? My thoughts on Miss Goldenweek's character is that the reason for her extreme laziness is because she doesn't like what she's doing. Her canon personality shows that she gets bored easily. But at the same time she hates the alternative to doing nothing. That leads me to believe that she's not overly happy with her job.
Miqila - Sounds a bit like the AcexNojiko ship. They have no interaction in canon but because they're both older siblings they're a semi-popular fanon pairing. Thanks for what you said about Sabo and Vivi argument. I was still a little worried that it took away from the canon stuff. But it was important Sabo character development versus the giant battle that we've already seen in the original. I'm glad your split on the Sabo/Vivi issue. It shows that they both have their good points and that they can hopefully learn from each other as the Saga progresses.
TheREALMightyKamina - The Tone Dial thing would be funny. But I'm not sure how Sabo would have gotten the Tone Dial in the first place. And more importantly, Sabo won't anywhere near them during that scene. I was testing the waters with the Holy Grail references since that's the most well known Monty Python film. But I suppose I could work in some other references as - not just this saga - but the story progresses.
The Keeper of Worlds - All of the Straw Hats have tragic backstories. But that's what made them such strong characters. I wanted to use this as a chance to publicly display my interpretation of Sabo's origin and show not just how he fits in with the tragic band of misfits but also why he thinks that way he does. My version of Sabo never got amnesia so he had ten years to hold a grudge against nobles and the prick that nearly killed him. Sanji and Sabo come from similar situations. But unlike Sabo, Sanji was fortunate enough to have his mother to teach him compassion and Zeff to literally beat chivalry into his head. Sanji is still forbidden from making any claim to his royal heritage. But he does have something to say about Sabo's view of royalty. And they'll have another quiet discussion once Sanji decides to re-enter the storyline and they get a moment alone. (So... next arc.)
Lightsbane1905 - Do NOT tell her! Hopefully the Octopus Balloon will keep Bonnie from having a heart attack. Her issue isn't with heights in general. Its falling from great heights with no control.
Bluejay Blaze - You noticed that, eh? Her father's Cobra. And I can pretend that Vivi's a viper. So I decided to go with a common theme. Elapidae and Taipan sounded unique and formal enough to pass for old royal names. Ah, I understand about the Python geekiness. What it boils down to is: you're either a Python fan... or you're sane. And yes, Flintstones. Is there a better instantly recognizable phrase to shout when sliding down a dinosaur? I've included two classic movie references in this chapter. One's for an 80's John Hughes movie and the other is a Clint Eastwood western from the 70's.
rasEnshur1KEn - Let's just pretend its some silly phrase that Luffy started shouting when he was a kid. But Ace and Sabo told him to stop because it sounded too silly to use in any other context but sliding down a dinosaur. Sanji's going to have his moment with Sabo during the Drum Kingdom Arc. (You know, when he finally comes back into the story.) Sabo does an interesting combinations of things. The chapter's here so read on to find out.
lostdog200 - Hmm... those are some very interesting options. My response? YES. Confused? Read the chapter and it'll make sense.
Fairy of the Friz - I'm glad you like Bonnie. The big reveal for her is coming soon. I'm a little nervous though because I hope it doesn't become a Beauty and the Beast thing where readers fall in love with the Beast (or in this case the rifle) and when the curse is finally broken the real Prince Adam (Bonnie Anne) can't hope to compare. Fingers crossed as far as that's concerned. As for the dinosaur bit, that's good to know. I knew from the start that it wasn't a brontosaurus on account that it tried to eat Luffy (in this story's case Sabo). But I couldn't for the life of me figure out what kind of dinosaur it actually was so I went with the most common 'long neck'. Do you have any idea what it could be? Apatosaurus? Brachiosaurus? (Incidentally, my spell check for this site says the 'proper' spelling for Brachiosaurus is 'Brontosaurus'. I'm not sure if it's just mine that does that...)
Lonely Puppy - Bonnie Anne is most definitely not a Mink. And she'd happily tell you that herself... if she was able to talk... and knew what a Mink was. I doubt Sabo would mind though. He loves her as a rifle. He'd still love her as a Mink. But for the sake of curiosity and from a purely ethical standpoint, would that be considered bestiality? Minks are animals but they also are highly intelligent with human-like features. They do have fur and have some more primal animal instincts... but does that make them animals? Or are they considered something more? We don't see very many inter-species relationships in One Piece. We don't see many relationships at all in Once Piece. So I'm not if cross-species relationships are considered socially acceptable. We've seen evidence of Fishmen and Giants together. But that's it.
Mr. 3-
A large bipedal crocodile-like dinosaur was making its way through the jungle on Little Garden when it spotted a strange white cube. The 'crocodile' decided to investigate the matter. The first and most important thing it needed to determine was whether or not the white cube was edible.
CHOMP!
The crocodile's teeth shattered when it found out the hard way that the white cube was as hard as steel. But the unfortunate reptile didn't have very long to mourn its lost teeth.
"Out of the way, lizard." The crocodile turned and spotted Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine.
"Grrrmmm…" the crocodile growled and then realized that its growl wasn't particularly menacing now that there were only two layers of gums on display as opposed to rows of razor sharp teeth.
"I'll take care of it," Miss Valentine volunteered.
SKISH!
The blonde Officer Agent lowered her weight to five kilos and launched herself high up overhead then rapidly increased her weight, "10,000 KILO PRESS!"
BOOOOOM!
Miss Valentine crashed down on the crocodile and left the broken reptile lying at the bottom of a crater.
Mr. 5 casually walked passed and opened a door in the side of the cube with his good hand then went inside with his partner.
"Ah, you're back," Mr. 3 greeted them as he sat drinking tea behind a desk in the middle of the cube.
"Zzzz…" Miss Goldenweek was napping in the corner below a circular window.
"Did everything go as planned?" Mr. 3 inquired.
"I put a bomb in the giant's rum like you told me to," Mr. 5 reported.
"For what it's worth, blondie and the princess quickly figured out it was us," Miss Valentine added.
"Excellent," Mr. 3 replied, "Now the pirates will begin searching for their invisible enemy which will make them easy pickings for us. We can proceed with the next stage of my plan."
"Before you do that," Mr. 5 cut him off, "You've got a deal to live up to. I did your dirty work. Now you've gotta fix my hand."
"Yes, yes, very well," Mr. 3 relented, "Let's see it…" Mr. 5 held out his heavily bandage right hand then slowly peeled off the bindings to reveal that his middle and index fingers had been blown off.
"It's been two days and the bleeding still hasn't stopped," Mr. 5 stated.
"Ew…" Miss Valentine groaned and looked the other way.
"Decision time," Mr. 3 prompted, "Do you want a fist or your fingers extended?"
"Extended," Mr. 5 answered. Mr. 3 nodded put his hand on Mr. 5's injury.
Gloop!
A white substance spewed out from Mr. 3's hand and quickly molded it into the shape of two white fingers that perfectly matched the fingers on Mr. 5's uninjured hand. The white substance hardened and Mr. 5 once again had all his fingers. Only two of them stood out because they were the wrong color.
"I haven't used my Wax Wax Devil Fruit Powers quite this way before," Mr. 3 admitted, "But the wax should also be able to stop the bleeding until you can receive proper medical attention."
"They just need last me until the end of this mission," Mr. 5 stated as he eyed his new appendages.
"Miss Goldenweek! Wake up!" Mr. 3 called out to his partner.
"Hmm…" the girl mumbled as she woke up from her nap.
"Fix Mr. 5's new fingers so they match the rest of his hand," Mr. 3 instructed.
Miss Goldenweek studied Mr. 5's new wax fingers for a moment then fished into the blue backpack next to her and pulled out a collection of paints. The girl began mixing the paints together on a pallet until she eventually created a color that matched Mr. 5's dark skin tone. "Hand, please…"
Mr. 5 extended his hand to her and the girl took him by the wrist and used a paintbrush to color his new wax fingers. When Miss Goldenweek was done, the wax digits blended into Mr. 5's hand perfectly. She'd even altered the color for his nails and the slightly darker skin on his knuckles.
"Not bad," Mr. 5 remarked as he compared his new fingers to the original ones on his uninjured hand. "They look exactly the same. You two do good work."
"Artist first, criminal assassin second," Miss Goldenweek stated then she turned and stared fixatedly at Mr. 3's teapot.
"Speak for yourself," Mr. 3 retorted.
"Now that that's settled," Miss Valentine prompted, "Can we get back to the matter at… the mission." The blonde agent quickly corrected herself to avoid making a bad pun. "Was there really a point to putting a bomb in that giant's rum? Couldn't we have just destroyed the pirates' ship?"
"Of course there was a point," Mr. 3 replied, "Those aren't just some run-of-the-mill giants. They were once the co-captains of the infamous Giant Pirates that ran amok in the Grand Line over a hundred years ago. The World Government saw fit to place substantial bounties on both of their heads. The bounties are still active today." He produced two wanted posters that depicted a much younger Brogy and Dorry.
WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE: BROGY 'THE RED OGRE' 100,000,000 BERRIES
WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE: DORRY 'THE BLUE OGRE' 100,000,000 BERRIES
"A hundred million!" Mr. 5 blurted out.
"For each of them!" Miss Valentine gasped.
"…" Miss Goldenweek continued to silently stare at the teapot.
"Only a fool would challenge a giant to a head on battle," Mr. 3 continued, "Those giants are already trying to kill each other so that bomb will make things easier for us. The combined total of the bounties that Mr. 0 placed on the princess and the pirates is one hundred thirty million berries. If we add in the bounties for the two giants we'll have a grand total of three hundred thirty million berries. Follow my commands and I'll cut you two in for thirty percent of the profits in this venture."
One hundred million berries was nothing to turn your nose up at.
"Alright," Mr. 5 agreed, "What's your plan if we're not going to be fighting them head on?"
"Execute a little cunning and even the mightiest of mountains will eventually crumble," Mr. 3 stated, "Here's what we'll do for the next stage…" Mr. 3 trailed off when he saw his young partner still staring fixatedly at the teapot but making no move to take it. "OH GOOD GRIEF! IF YOU WANT SOME TEA THEN GET UP AND TAKE THE POT YOURSELF!"
"Here, kid," Mr. 5 said as he put the teapot and a cup down in front of Miss Goldenweek.
The girl nodded her thanks and poured herself a cup of tea. "Don't let your new fingers get too warm or they'll melt." Then she turned and stared fixatedly at the cup of sugar on the table.
"You see? You're only encouraging her laziness," Mr. 3 pointed out as he tossed the sugar bowl to his partner. "Back to more important matters… I haven't gotten this far by going out and challenging my enemies to face-to-face battles. My personal motto is: the greatest crimes require the greatest cunning. There are many ways to defeat your enemy that don't require outright fighting."
Vivi stepped in between Luffy and Dorry in one last desperate attempt to stop the impending fight where Luffy was challenging a giant to a head on battle.
"PLEASE LISTEN, MR. DORRY!" Vivi pleaded, "IT WASN'T US! AN ASSASSIN PUT A BOMB IN THAT RUM! PLEASE! YOU CAN'T FIGHT LIKE THIS! YOUR INSIDES WERE DAMAGED BY THE EXPLOSION!"
Dorry ignored the Princess' words and glared down at Luffy, "HOW DARE YOU!" he roared, "YOU DESPICABLE LITTLE RUNT!" Dorry swung his massive sword down at Luffy who jumped to avoid it.
SKISH!
THOOOOM!
The impact from Dorry's sword hitting the earth had caused it to split like an earthquake.
"YAAH!" Vivi yelped and ran out of the way as Luffy took on an adversary a hundred times his size.
Luffy landed on Dorry's sword and ran up the giant's arm to get inside his guard, "GUM… GUM…"
WHAM!
Dorry swatted Luffy with his shield arm like he was a pesky fly and sent the rubber man crashing down into the ground.
THUD!
Dorry raised his sword up overhead and prepared to bring it down on his grounded opponent.
WOING!
Luffy stretched his arms out passed the giant and grabbed onto a tree behind his massive adversary. "GUM… GUM… ROCKET!"
SHOOOM!
Luffy yanked himself out of the way and Dorry's sword cleaved into the ground.
THOOOOM!
"KOFF! KOFF!" the giant hacked up blood as his movements took their toll in his internal injuries.
WHING!
Luffy went flying across the clearing and swung passed the other side of the tree he'd grabbed onto.
"Sorry about this, giant-guy," Luffy apologized before he launched himself back in the other direction. "GUM… GUM… ROOCKEEET!"
SHOOOOOM!
Luffy blasted off in the opposite direction and slammed into Dorry's stomach at full speed.
WHAAAAM!
"UUUUGGHH!" Dorry's groaned and spat up blood from Luffy's rocketing into his injured stomach. "You're… a Devil Fruit User… how careless of me…" The giant's last move as he fell to the ground was to throw himself down on top of Luffy so he could at least squish his opponent with his last movement.
BOOOOOOM!
"LUFFY!" Vivi cried out as she ran over and found the pirate embedded in the ground under Dorry's leg.
"Huff… huff…" Luffy gasped for breath as he rolled out from under his fallen foe, "How is he?"
"I think he'll be alright," Vivi replied, "He'll be safer unconscious like this. He was beyond reasoning at this point. You did the right thing."
Luffy sat up and growled, "Now I'm really pissed. Someone interfered in this manly battle of honor." Luffy turned and stared off into the trees. "I hope Sabo finds them. I'd probably just kick the guy's ass. Any damage Sabo does will be a lot more permanent."
But then the worst thing possible happened…
KRAKA-THOOOOM!
Luffy and Vivi yelped in alarm as a familiar volcano erupted. "THE VOLCANO!"
KRAKA-THOOOOOM!
"GABABABABABA!" Brogy laughed as he sat outside his home with Usopp and Nami, "The call to battle! Today's been an exciting day!"
"You're going to fight again?" Nami questioned, "But what about your injuries?"
"That wouldn't stop him either," Brogy replied. "Making excuses in a relentless battle to the death would only tarnish one's honor! GABABABABABA!"
"GIVE IT YOUR ALL, MASTER BROGY!" Usopp encouraged the proud giant that he'd taken a liking to.
"GABABABABA!" Brogy laughed, "I'LL GET HIM GOOD THIS TIME, USOPP!"
"They sure do like their pointless fighting," Nami remarked.
"IT'S NOT POINTLESS, YOU IGNORAMUS!" Usopp snapped, "This is a man's battle! A fight between proud warriors! I wanna be just like them some day!"
"Yeah, whatever," Nami replied, "Let's just head back to the ship. We can't afford to wait around here for a year so we'll have to meet up with the others and decide what we're going to do instead."
"Hold on!" Usopp protested, "I'll proudly admit that I would be completely useless against all those dinosaurs and monsters in the jungle! Therefore it would be impossible for us to get back to the ship. So we should just wait right here until Master Brogy returns from his battle."
"What happened to all that proud talk you were just spouting out?" Nami challenged him.
"I said I want so be like them some day," Usopp reminded her, "I'm not at that stage yet. But one day I will! Mark my words! One day I'll be a proud warrior like those giants and I'd be proud of the life I led until the day I finally I die. And when they lay me to rest and mark my grave it will be inscribed 'Here lies Usopp… A Brave Warrior of the Sea'!"
"Yeah, yeah, just try to become a reliable warrior before we all die of old age," Nami requested as she grabbed the sniper and began to drag him off into the jungle. "We know that Luffy, Vivi and the World's Weirdest Couple are at the other giant's house. We can at least meet up with them there."
THOOM!
The ground shook outside Dorry's cave as the giant planted his hands and forced himself back up.
"Here stands Dorry… a proud warrior worthy of Elbaf's Honor!" the giant intoned, "KOFF! KOFF!"
"Mr. Dorry! Stop!" Vivi pleaded, "You can't fight in your condition!"
"Don't make me fight you again, giant-guy!" Luffy warned him, "Your battle's been interfered with!"
Dorry responded by grabbing hold of his house and lifting the hole-filled mountain – which apparently wasn't a mountain – off of the ground and dropping it on top of Luffy.
BOOOOM!
"HEY! GET YOUR HOUSE OFFA ME!" Luffy yelled as he was pinned down by the weight of the 'mountain'.
"You can't stop me from going," Dorry told them, "It may have been a hundred years since our battle started… but to run from a battle that is underway would mean running away from being a warrior. And to no longer be a warrior is to no longer be myself. I would rather die on my feet in battle than to live in disgrace and hide like a coward."
Dorry bowed his head, "I apologize for doubting you, little friends. I know now that this is merely Elbaf's Judgment. This means that I have not been blessed with Divine Protection."
"ENOUGH ABOUT GODS AND DIVINE INTERVENTION!" Luffy argued, "YOU CAN'T JUST GO OFF AND DIE BECAUSE YOU THINK YOUR GOD IS TELLING YOU TO! SOMEBODY INTERFERED IN YOUR DUEL! AND A DUEL THAT'S BEEN INTERFERED WITH BY A THIRD PARTY IS NO LONGER A PROPER DUEL!"
"SILENCE!" Dorry snapped, "A little brat who has lived but ten or twenty years could not possibly comprehend Elbaf's Divine Words."
"SHUT UP AND GET ME OUTTA HERE!" Luffy hollered.
Dorry turned to see Brogy approaching.
"GABABABABABA! Dorry! After all these years of drinking only water, that rum must have been especially refreshing, right?"
"Of course!" Dorry replied, "It tasted of God!"
"GABABABABABA!" Brogy laughed, "Aren't you a poet! HERE I COME!"
BOOOOOOOM!
The giants once again collided. And despite his internal injuries from Mr. 5's bomb and the additional injuries from his fight with Luffy, Dorry managed to withstand Brogy's opening blow.
"GRRRAAAAAAHHHHH!" Luffy screamed out in rage. He scratched and clawed at the dirt as he struggled fruitlessly to escape from the mountain keeping him pinned to the ground. "THIS ISN'T RIGHT! WHO WOULD DO SOMETHING SO UNDERHANDED TO SUCH A PROUD WARRIOR!?"
Vivi glanced around her and suddenly realized that someone was missing, "Where's Carue?"
"Aw crap… I'm lost," Zoro realized as he stared around the jungle in confusion while dragging a dead triceratops behind him. "I feel like I've seen that tree before… was I supposed to take a left at that tree with the vine wrapped around it?"
Zoro turned and spotted Nami leaning against a tree with her arms folded smugly across her chest.
"Oh great, here to mock me are you?" Zoro asked the Navigator. "Fine, but can it wait until we get back to the ship?"
Zoro dragged the dead dinosaur over to his crewmate, "Believe it or not… I'm actually happy to see you. But… uh… what're you doing so far away from the ship?"
"…" Nami gave no response.
"Hello?"
GLOOOOOP!
"WAAAAH!"
"AAAAAAAAAAHHH!" the real Nami and Usopp screamed in terror as they ran through the jungle. "DIIINOOSAAAUUUURR!"
"I DON'T WANNA DIIIIEEE!" Usopp yelped as he put on another burst of speed and raced ahead.
ZZZZIIP!
"Huff… huff…" Nami stopped and panted, "There's no one better at running away than that guy."
Nami looked behind her and thankfully couldn't see the dinosaur that had been chasing them. But then she spotted a familiar pirate.
"Luffy!" Nami called out. The Captain had a wide smile and his arm was raised in greeting. Nami went over to him, "Usopp and I were just coming to see you guys. But we got attacked by a dinosaur and that big chicken ran off on me."
"…" Luffy gave no response.
"Uh… Luffy?"
GLOOOOOP!
"KYYAAAAA!"
"COME OUT, NOSE PICKER!" Sabo shouted as he stalked through the jungle with Bonnie Anne poised to fire and scanned the huge trees for any sign of the Bomb Man. "I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!"
Sabo growled lowly as he made his way passed a fallen log, "I'M NOT GONNA SETTLE FOR YOUR HAND! THIS TIME I'M GONNA SHOOT YOUR BALLS OFF! YOU PROBABLY WON'T EVEN NOTICE THEY'RE GONE, YOU SACKLESS COWARD!"
KER-CHOW!
Bonnie fired off a shot and her round whizzed passed a familiar blue-haired figure.
"Princess? What the heck are you doing here?" Sabo wondered as he approached the princess. "Listen, if you thought what I did to the nose picker back at Whiskey Peak was bad… you don't wanna stick around and see what I do to him now."
"…" Vivi gave no response.
KER-CHOW!
Bonnie fired another shot and blew off Vivi's head.
"WHAT THE HELL!?" Sabo exclaimed. Then he noticed that the Princess' body had remained in the same position despite her head being blown off. "Oh… wait a minute… she didn't move…" Sabo frowned, "Then that means… IT'S A TRAP!"
GLOOOP!
Sabo was thrown against a tree by a wave of white wax that quickly hardened around his limbs.
"CANDLE LOCK!"
Usopp kept running through the jungle until he suddenly came to the horrible realization that he was running alone.
"Nami? Nami?" he paused and looked back over his shoulder.
The Navigator was gone.
"NOOOOO!" Usopp shrieked in horror then took off running with renewed purpose, "LUUUUFFFYYYYY!"
Usopp raced through the jungle and finally arrived at Dorry's house. But in his frantic haste he tripped over a rock and crashed face-first into a bigger rock.
KRAK!
Usopp pushed himself back up, wiped the blood from his face, and spotted his captain pinned under a mountain. He paid the odd situation no mind and ran over to him.
"LUFFY! IT'S HORRIBLE!" Usopp cried, "NAMI WAS EATEN BY A DINOSAUR!"
"WHAT!? FOR REAL!?" Luffy shouted.
"I'M SO SORRY!" Usopp wailed, "We were running through the jungle being chase by a dinosaur! One second she was there running beside me! And the next she was gone! WHAT DO I DO!? HOW DO I LIVE WITH MYSELF!? I LET MY NAKAMA GET EATEN BY A DINOSAUR!"
"Wait, hold on!" Vivi interrupted when she realized that she needed to be the voice of reason for the two excitable pirates. "Did you actually see her get eaten?"
"Of course not!" Usopp snapped, "I was way too scared to look back! If it wasn't a dinosaur… then I could have been another monster!"
"Or… it could have been Baroque Works," Vivi suggested. "Miss All Sunday said she'd be sending Mr. 3 after us. And Mr. Dorry's rum exploded so we know that Mr. 5 is on the island too."
"WAIT! THE RUM EXPLODED!?" Usopp interrupted.
"Yes… but he went off to fight despite his injuries," Vivi told him.
"NO! NOOO!" Usopp yelled as he realized what that meant for the giants he idolized, "THIS IS HORRIBLE! THOSE TWO HAVE BEEN FIGHTING WILL ALL THEIR STRENGTH FOR ALL THESE YEARS! IT'S THE MOST PROUD BATTLE IN THE WORLD! IT CAN'T END LIKE THIS!"
BOOOOOM!
BOOOOOM!
BOOOOOM!
Brogy's ax sounded like thunder as it collided with Dorry's shield over and over again.
"WHAT THE MATTER, DORRY?" Brogy called out, "GETTING TIRED!?"
"Nonsense!" Dorry retorted as he struggled to block Brogy's thunderous blows. "I'm as strong as ever!"
"Dorry the Blue Ogre is certainly tenacious," Mr. 3 remarked as he watched the battling titans from down below. Miss Goldenweek was nearby nibbling on a rice cracker. "Perhaps I'll lend a hand…"
GLOOOP!
Mr. 3 extended his hand a white liquid wax oozed out of it and collected in a puddle in front of him.
"UGH!" Dorry grunted as he stepped in the wax puddle and lost his footing.
"DORRY… YOU'RE WIDE OPEN!" Brogy shouted as he lashed out and cleaved his opponent across the chest with all his strength.
CHUUNK!
Brogy smiled a grim smile as he best friend fell. "After a century… our fight is finally over…"
"…" Luffy, Usopp and Vivi watched in horror as Dorry's blood splashed above the tree line like a geyser.
They all knew that the century-long battle had been settled. Not because one giant was stronger. Not because of Elbaf's Judgment but because of outside interference from a scheming scumbag.
"This is merely Elbaf's Judgment," Dorry had said before heading off to his demise. "This means that I have not been blessed with divine protection."
"HOOOOOW DAAAAAREEE YOOOOOUUU!" Luffy hollered, "SHOW YOURSELF!"
"Mr. 3… did you hear something just now?" Miss Goldenweek asked. It sounded like someone shouting.
"Please," Mr. 3 scoffed as he drank a celebratory cup of tea, "It's probably some poor wretch of an animal howling in the jungle."
Up overhead, tears were running down Brogy's face as he stood over his fallen foe.
"Seventy three thousand four hundred sixty seven battles…" Brogy recounted, "And one victory."
Mr. 3 finally decided to make his presence known, "Hmmhmm, it must be nice to be such a simple fool that cries tears from being too happy. I guess I should be the first to offer my congratulations."
Brogy looked back at the smarmy little man, "You think these are tears of joy?" Brogy growled at Mr. 3. "WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW? WHO ARE YOU ANYWAY?"
"I am Mr. 3," Mr. 3 introduced himself, "My apologies for only giving you my codename. I'm a sculptor by trade, you see." He motioned to his partner, "And this is my assistant Miss Goldenweek. She's young but is a highly skilled realist painter." Mr. 3 grinned, "And you, my giant friend, are now my prisoner."
"WHAT!?" Brogy shouted as he looked down and found his feet stuck in a puddle of white wax. "WHAT IS THIS?" The giant struggled but the wax had hardened to be as hard as steel.
"CANDLE JACKET!"
"Alright, Luffy," Usopp resolved, "I might not know who these Mr. 3 or Mr. 5 guys are but I'll find them and take care of them no matter what!"
"I'll go with you," Vivi offered.
"Good…" Usopp said, "I might need some back up."
"Kyahahaha! You won't have to look very far."
Luffy, Usopp and Vivi all turned to see Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine standing at the edge of the clearing. The Bomb Man had a beaten Carue tucked under his arm.
"IT WAS YOU!" Luffy yelled as he glared at the two Officer Agents. "LAST TIME I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU WERE! NOW I'VE GOT A REASON SO I'LL PUNCH YOU A HUNDRED TIMES HARDER!"
"You can have this back," Mr. 5 stated as he tossed the tenderized duck away from. "He was completely useless to us anyway."
"HOW COULD YOU!?" Vivi yelled, "CARUE HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!"
"Kyahahaha!" Miss Valentine cackled, "We were told to use the bird to lure you away from your pirate friends, Princess. But that dumb bird refused to cry out for you no matter how hard we hit him. Completely useless."
"But it turns out we didn't even need to bother," Mr. 5 commented, "Since it looks like Straw Hat is already trapped."
"Carue…" Vivi cried out as she ran to her duck's side, "I'm so sorry you got hurt again because of me."
"SO IT WAS YOU THAT PUT THE BOMB IN THE GIANT'S RUM!" Usopp exclaimed.
"Yeah, that was me," Mr. 5 answered. "Who's this guy? Was he on the list?"
Miss Valentine shook her head, "Nope. But I guess we can still eliminate him anyway. Kyahahahaha!"
"YOU INTERFERED IN THE GIANTS' DUEL!" Usopp yelled at them.
"I'LL KICK BOTH YOUR ASSES!" Luffy hollered.
"You're the ones who will be eliminated!" Vivi snapped as she stood up and drew her weapons.
"So you're actually going to try and fight us yourself this time, Miss Wednesday?" Mr. 5 taunted.
"Kyahahahahaha!" Miss Valentine laughed, "Your strong blonde friend isn't here to save you this time. You don't stand a chance against Officer Agents like us."
"SURE FIRE… GUNPOWDER STAR!" Usopp shouted as he fired at Mr. 5.
CHOO!
Usopp's round exploded on the Bomb Man.
KA-BOOOOM!
"PEACOCK SLASHER!" Vivi yelled as she flung her bladed jewels at Miss Valentine.
SKISH!
Miss Valentine lowered her weight and launched herself high up into the air.
"Spitball… Cannon…"
PTOI!
A wad of spit flew out of the explosion around Mr. 5 and struck Usopp chest… then exploded on impact.
KA-BOOOOOOM!
"USOPP!" Luffy cried out in alarm as he saw his Master Gunner left charred in the wake of the explosion.
"You have the prick with the rifle to thank for that one," Mr. 5 stated as he looked at his wax fingers and was pleased to see they hadn't melted in the explosion. "I can't use my usual attack because of him."
"10,000 KILO PRESS!"
Miss Valentine dropped out of the sky and crashed down on Usopp.
BOOOOOM!
Usopp was left buried up to his neck in the ground as the blonde Officer Agent climbed off of him. "Kyahahahaha! Useless!"
"WHY YOU!" VIvi howled as she charged Mr. 5.
PTOI!
The Bomb Man spat at the ground in front of the charging Princess and caused an explosion.
KA-BOOOOM!
The ground exploded under Vivi's feet and sent her flying towards Mr. 5 who casually reached out and caught her by the throat with his new hand.
"That's enough out of you," Mr. 5 said, "We're not here to kill you, Princess. We're here under orders from Mr. 3 simply to retrieve you."
"Wait… your hand…" Vivi realized as she looked down at the hand clenched around her throat.
"Mr. 3 fixed it for me," Mr. 5 explained, "He's got Devil Fruit Powers from the Wax Wax Fruit. He's a Candle Man. And he was willing to give me some replacement digits if I put a bomb in the giant's rum."
"SO IT WAS HIS IDEA!" Luffy realized, "WHERE'S MR. 3? I'LL KICK HIS ASS!"
"Damn you…" Brogy growled as he now found himself pinned down to the ground by Mr. 3's wax. "What are you doing to me!?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Mr. 3 replied as the end of his '3'-shaped top knot lit up with a flame like a candle. "I'm about to turn you into my latest artistic masterpiece!"
KA-BOOOOOOM!
Vivi was restrained by Miss Valentine and could only watch in horror as Mr. 5 blew up Luffy. She bit her lip and surveyed the beaten Carue, the buried Usopp and the blown up Luffy.
"Kyahahahahaha!" Miss Valentine laughed, "So even the one worth thirty million was no match for us."
"Consider that repayment for what you did to me at Whiskey Peak," Mr. 5 told Luffy. "You wannabe pirates made a big mistake in sticking your noses into our organizations business. Mr. 3 has already captured the rifle-bastard, the swordsman and the girl. I'm hoping he'll let me settle things up with the blonde… but if not I'll be sure to get a front row seat to him dying."
"Hmph…" Luffy grunted, "You guys got Sabo and Zoro? Then you're dead meat."
"So you can still talk after taking a Kick Bomb to the face," Mr. 5 noted.
"Got to hell!" Luffy spat defiantly then he actually spat on Mr. 5's shoe.
PTOI!
"Kyahahaha… That was dumb…" Miss Valentine remarked as Mr. 5 glanced down at the spit on his shoe then lashed out and kicked Luffy in the face. The Bomb Man's foot exploded on impact.
KA-BOOOOOM!
But Mr. 5 didn't stop with just one kick. His foot exploded on Luffy another three times.
KA-BOOOOOM-BOOOOOM-BOOOOOOM!
"DIE ALREADY, YOU STUPID STUBBORN BASTARD!" Mr. 5 yelled when he finally stopped his barrage.
"…" Luffy was silent while Vivi looked in shock.
Mr. 5 stuck his hands in his pockets and turned away from his latest victim, "Let's go, Miss Valentine."
"LUFFY! CARUE! USOPP!" Vivi called out for help as the two Officer Agents dragged her away.
"Well now I know how it feels to be a candle on a birthday cake," Zoro remarked.
Vivi, Sabo, Zoro and Nami had all been placed shin deep in a structure of hardened wax. There was a wax pillar above them with a wax bowl that had a smiley face engraved on the side. A number of candles were stuck in the rim of the bowl.
"What's with the eye?" Zoro asked when he spotted Sabo's black eye. "Did they rough you up before they trapped you?"
"Nah, the wax guy was too much of a spineless coward to try something like that when he caught me," Sabo replied. "And the kid was the one that grabbed Bonnie so I didn't kick her in the face when I had the chance. The black eye is actually from the Princess."
"I said I was sorry!" Vivi reminded him.
"FEAST YOUR EYES ON MY CANDLE SERVICE SET!" Mr. 3 crowed. "YOU WILL ALL BECOME MY ULTIMATE ARTISTIC MASTERPIECE! The wax mist that is sprinkling down on your heads will eventually turn you into wax figures. Your expressions of horror will be so genuine that even my Wax Wax Powers couldn't hope to copy them! YOU'LL GIVE YOUR LIVES FOR THE SAKE OF MY ART!"
"NO WAY!" Nami shouted, "WE DON'T WANNA BE PART OF YOUR SICK ART!" She looked over and spotted Brogy pinned to the ground by wax, "BROGY! DON'T JUST LAY THERE OR YOU'LL BE TURNED INTO A WAX FIGURE TOO!"
"Now that guy's gonna be a big statue," Zoro commented as he noticed the giant for the first time.
"Brogy… The rum you gave to Dorry had a bomb in it," Sabo informed the trapped giant. "It was all that guy's idea. He interfered in your battle of honor."
"A bomb?" Brogy repeated. He thought back to what Dorry had said during their battle.
"After all these years of drinking only water, that rum must have been especially refreshing, right?"
"Of course! It tasted of God!"
"Hmph, don't bother with him," Mr. 3 grunted, "He didn't even notice his friend's injuries. He killed the friend that had lived here with him for a hundred years! He was so proud of himself that he shed tears of joy! And now that he knows its too late for that simpleton to do anything about it."
"I knew…" Brogy confessed, "I knew from the moment that I first swung my ax that Dorry was hiding something from me."
"That's preposterous!" Mr. 3 scoffed, "If you knew then why didn't you stop? You didn't hold back at all. You killed your friend in cold blood."
"YOU'RE WRONG!" Brogy growled, "A dishonorable little runt like you would know nothing of duels of honor! You could never comprehend the reason behind my tears! Dorry fought despite all of his injuries. How could I dishonor a warrior who kept fighting despite the pain he bared? HOW COULD I SHOW PITY TO SOMEONE WHO WENT TO SUCH LENGTHS TO FIGHT!?"
"EH!?" Mr. 3 flinched back at Brogy vehement shout. The giant had gotten riled up again.
"I'll pay my respects to my friend Dorry by squashing that little punk like the bug he is!" Brogy snarled as he began to struggle against his wax bonds.
PTOI!
KA-BOOOOOOOOM!
An explosion engulfed Brogy and his struggles stopped.
"That big annoying freak's shouts were getting on my nerves," Mr. 5 growled as he stood behind Mr. 3 with Miss Valentine.
Miss Goldenweek had decided that she didn't need to be involved anymore and had set up a picnic blanket complete with a collection of rice crackers and a new pot of tea. Bonnie Anne was set on the side of the picnic blanket as a captive guest for the tea party.
"Hey! Hold on!" Sabo complained as he looked to the side and spotted Zoro's three swords sheathed at his waist. "How come you let him keep his swords but took away my rifle?"
"Do you think I'm a fool?" Mr. 3 asked, "He can't do anything while he's trapped there but you could still shoot your rifle. My young partner Miss Goldenweek will be holding your weapon for safekeeping."
Sabo stared passed Mr. 3, Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine and glared right at Miss Goldenweek. "Listen up, you little brat! If you get so much as one crumb on that rifle… I'll come over there and kick your ass!"
"SABO!" Nami objected, "She's a kid!"
"Somehow that doesn't surprise me," Zoro remarked, "He clearly lost his fight to the Princess so now he's set his sights lower."
"Screw you!" Sabo snapped but then looked thoughtful, "Although… Nami does have a point… she's a little kid. I don't know if I could morally beat the crap out of her…"
"..." Miss Goldenweek blinked at the trapped pirate's attempted threat.
"Yeah… still a kid…" Sabo mused, "Okay! New threat! Kid, if you get so much as one crumb on that rifle… I'll come over there AND GIVE YOU THE WORST SPANKING OF YOUR LIFE!"
"EEP!" Miss Goldenweek squeaked while Nami flushed and Vivi looked confused.
"What's a spanking?" the Princess inquired.
"It's where they slap you on the ass until you can't sit without it stinging," Nami informed her.
"Oh!" Vivi gasped and flushed faintly.
"Why does it not surprise me that the pristine Princess doesn't know what a spanking is while the bratty adopted thief does," Sabo commented.
"I'm not that pristine..." Vivi mumbled.
"What's that supposed to mean!?" Nami challenged him.
"It takes one to know one," Sabo replied, "Did you get fed soap too? Luffy knew this lady that ran a tavern and whenever heard me, Ace or Luffy curse she'd stick a bar of soap in our mouth."
"Don't be ridiculous," Nami said, "Bellemere was poor. She couldn't afford to waste soap like that."
"ENOUGH!" Mr. 3 scolded his captives, "Don't make light of the situation I have you trapped in! You'll all be turned into wax figures and I'll send you off to Mr. 0 as proof of a job well done. The four of you are worth an even one hundred million berries from my organization."
"Taking your evil villain death trap seriously would mean I'd have to consider you a legitimate threat," Sabo retorted. "You said that you wanted us to be trapped with looks of anguish on our faces. Well, call me petty and spiteful, but I'm going to make sure you don't get your way by dying with a big goofy smile on my face!"
"No one's dying except him…" Brogy growled as he regained consciousness and renewed his struggles. The wax encasing his body began to crack under the strain.
Krek… krek…
"Looks like I'll have to completely immobilize you," Mr. 3 resolved, "WAX WAX ARTS… SWORD!"
GLOOP!
Mr. 3 used his wax powers to create a massive broadsword that was bigger than his own body and impaled it through Brogy's hand.
SHUNK!
Mr. 3 quickly repeated this process with the giant's other limbs.
SHUNK! SHUNK! SHUNK!
"Now if you move, your hands and feet will be torn off!" Mr. 3 taunted.
"YOU MONSTER!" Vivi shrieked at him.
"SPEED UP, MY CANDLE SERVICE SET!" Mr. 3 shouted at his creation, "TURN THEM ALL INTO WAX FIGURES! FUHAHAHAHA!"
The bowl on the Candle Service Set started to revolve even faster and the wax mist became wax rain.
"KOFF! KOFF!" Nami coughed and clutched her throat. "My chest hurts!"
"The wax is getting in our lungs!" Vivi wheezed, "At this rate we'll be turned into wax figures from the inside out!"
"…" Sabo folded his arms across his chest and continued to smirk defiantly.
"Hey giant, you can still move, right?" Zoro asked.
"Huh?" Brogy grunted.
"Tearing your arms and legs off would hurt like hell," Zoro admitted, "But a dead body is useless. I can still move…" Zoro drew two of his swords. "Once I cut off my legs… can I count on you to help me crush these bastards?"
"YOU'RE GOING TO CUT OFF YOUR OWN FEET!?" Nami shrieked. "HOW CAN YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS!?"
"It's because we're in a situation like this that I'm saying it," Zoro told her. "You got a better plan?"
"…" Sabo shrugged then shook his head.
"It'll be useless!" Vivi berated the Boatswain, "Even if you do manage to cut yourself free and get down they'll catch you again in an instant!"
"I won't know unless I try," Zoro stated, "Just standing here will only bring us certain death. So if we're gonna die… we might as well put up as messy a struggle as we can and fight to our last breath."
"That swordsman's gone insane," Mr. 5 realized, "That's the only explanation."
"It's obviously a bluff," Mr. 3 scoffed, "There's no way he'd try something so ridiculous."
"GABABABABA!" Brogy let out a hearty laugh. "I had almost lost my will to fight. But I'll gladly go along with spirit like yours!"
"HOW DO YOU GUYS EXPECT TO FIGHT WITHOUT YOUR LEGS?!" Nami demanded.
"Who knows," Zoro admitted, "But I'll fight to win!"
"WHAT IS WITH THESE PEOPLE!?" Mr. 3 wondered, "THEY'RE INSANE!"
"WAIT! ME TOO!" Vivi suddenly called out, "Cut me loose too! I'll fight with you!"
"VIVI!" Nami exclaimed.
"…" Sabo rolled his eyes.
"LET'S DO THIS!" Zoro resolved as he pointed his blades at his ankles.
"YOU WON'T ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING!" Mr. 3 hollered, "I'LL JUST KILL YOU ALL!"
"RAAAAAAHHHHHH!"
Everyone looked up in surprise as Luffy, Usopp and Carue burst out of the trees.
"YOU THERE!" Luffy bellowed, "GET READY TO HAVE YOUR ASSES KICKED! USOPP! BIRD! LET'S DO THIS!"
"RIGHT!" Usopp cheered.
"QUACK!" Carue crowed.
"LuffY!" Nami exclaimed.
"Usopp?" Zoro called out in surprise.
"Carue!" Vivi gasped.
"MASTER BROGY! WE'LL AVENGE YOUR AGONY!" Usopp vowed.
"LUFFY!" Nami yelled, "BEAT THESE LOSERS' FACES INTO AN UNRECOGNIZABLE PULP AND SEND THEM FLYING FAR, FAR AWAY!"
Pow!
Luffy punched his hand, "You've got it. These guys defiled the giants' honor duel!"
"Hmm… so you're the Captain," Mr. 3 observed, "The boss offered a thirty million berries reward for killing you. I must admit that his standards have fallen…"
"Hey, you've got weird hair!" Luffy noted, "It's a '3' and it's on fire!"
"SHUT UP!" Mr. 3 berated him.
"LUFFY! DESTROY THE PILLAR OR WE'LL BE TURNING TO WAX FIGURES!" Nami ordered.
"Oh… are you guys in trouble?" Luffy asked.
"Nah… we're fine," Zoro assured him.
"ZORO! YOUR LEGS ARE BLEEDING!" Nami yelped when she spotted the blood pooling around the swordsman's feet.
"Yeah… I must've hacked about halfway through," Zoro admitted.
"YOU CALL THAT FINE!?" Nami berated him.
"…" Sabo glared in annoyance at the red puddle that was starting to spread towards him.
"What's with you?" Zoro demanded. "I'm still waiting to hear your plan."
Sabo glared at Zoro then finally opened his mouth and answered, "I've been holding my breath since he increased the spinning speed. The wax can't get in my lungs if I don't breathe it in. But for now I can go with Plan Luffy…" Sabo took one deep breath and shouted out to his brother. "LUFFY! FORGET ABOUT THE PILLAR! ATTACK THE SMILEY BOWL AT THE TOP! IT'S DRIPPING WAX THAT'S GONNA KILL US!"
"Oh… that thing's gonna kill you? Why didn't you say so?" Luffy questioned, "Sure thing! I don't know what that smiley pumpkin face is… but I'll smash it!"
"We'll see about that!" Mr. 3 sneered as he stepped in between Luffy and his artwork.
"I'm ready, Luffy!" Usopp announced, "You'll see a whole different Usopp today!"
Shink!
Zoro drew Wado Ichimonji and pointed it up over his head.
"What're you doing now?" Nami asked.
"If I'm gonna die… I want it to be in this pose," Zoro answered.
"…" Sabo was back to holding his breath. He looked up at Zoro's sword in annoyance then folded his arms across his chest and glared petulantly at Miss Goldenweek and the rifle on her picnic blanket.
"Instead of talking about poses can't you do something about the bleeding?" Nami requested. "It's making me nauseous."
"Then don't look at it," Zoro advised, "There's nothing I can do at this point."
Vivi stared at her three fellow captives in surprise, "Even though we're far from escaping our situation... they're still not showing an ounce of fear… The second Luffy arrived their spirits all lifted…"
Miss Goldenweek paused in eating a rice cracker and looked over at Mr. 3, "These people don't seem overly concerned about their situation."
"The same applies to you as well, Miss Goldenweek," Mr. 3 informed the girl on the picnic blanket. "They're not taking us seriously. But if you ask me, that boy doesn't seem dependable at all."
"Mr. 3, let us take care of him," Mr. 5 offered.
"Don't be ridiculous," Mr. 3 refused, "You claimed you took care of him earlier but it appears as though your attacks only angered him. He's clearly too much for you to handle. You two can have the rabble behind him. I'll show you the gap in our power when I add a Straw Hat Luffy figure to my collection."
"ENOUGH TALK!" Usopp shouted, "YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR! PREPARE TO DIE!"
"QUACK!"
Usopp and Carue quickly retreated and hid behind some trees, "OKAY LUFFY! WE'LL BACK YOU UP?"
"Huh? You say something?" Luffy asked.
"Looks like we don't get to fight then, little man," Brogy remarked to Zoro.
"Yeah," Zoro agreed, "We can let them handle the fighting for now."
"LET'S GET THIS STARTED!" Mr. 3 exclaimed, "CANDLE LOCK!"
GLOOOP!
Luffy was caught off guard which allowed Mr. 3's stream of wax to ensnare his legs. The wax hardened into a candle-shaped log that bound his legs together.
"HE GOT HIM!" Nami gasped.
Whap!
"…" Sabo slapped his forehead in annoyance.
"What the heck?" Luffy yelped as he dropped to the ground and stared at his locked legs in surprise. "My legs look like a hammer now…" Luffy smirked, "THIS'LL BE USEFUL!"
"That was too easy," Mr. 3 remarked, "Now I'll get his hands… CANDLE LOCK!"
GLOOOP!
WOING!
Mr. 3 shot another stream of wax at Luffy but quickly stretched out his arm and grabbed onto the handle of one of the wax swords impaling Brogy's hand and stretched himself out of the way.
SHOOOOM!
"Whoa!" Mr. 3 dodged to the side as Luffy whizzed passed him. "Where's he aiming?"
"Sorry about this, giant-guy," Luffy apologized as he swung himself around the handle of the sword.
WHING-WHING-WHING!
"Uggh…" Brogy groaned in pain as the sword wiggled from the pull of Luffy swinging around it.
"WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING!?" Zoro wondered.
"LUFFY!" Vivi gasped.
"…" Sabo's eyes widened in surprise as he glanced from Luffy to the spinning bowl up above them.
"GUM… GUM… HAMMER!" Luffy went flying legs-first off the sword and smashed his 'hammer' into the smiling face of Mr. 3's Candle Service Set.
WHAAAAAAAM!
The wax lock on Luffy's legs shattered and the spinning top of the Candle Service Set was knocked clear off of the pillar and toppled a massive tree as it crashed to the ground.
BOOOOOOOOM!
"HE DID IT!" Nami cheered, "THE BOWL'S DESTROYED!"
"Phew…" Sabo let out a sigh of relief, "Good thing he attacked the bowl and not the pillar like you were telling him too. We're safe now and can breathe freely. We'll worry about getting out of here once Luffy finishes beating the stuffing out of the candle-guy."
"Speak for yourself," Zoro said, "My arm's stuck."
"And I can't feel my hands," Vivi reported.
"Well then you shouldn't have wasted so much breath screaming for help," Sabo pointed out.
Vivi, Sabo, Zoro, Nami and even Brogy all had splotches of white wax covering various parts of their bodies but for now they were no longer in mortal peril.
"YOU RUFFIAN!" Mr. 3 shouted as he glared at Luffy, "HOW DARE YOU DESTROY MY MASTERPIECE! HOW DARE YOU INTERFERE! WAX WAX ARTS… HARPOON!"
GLOOOP!
Mr. 3 hurled a giant wax arrow at Luffy.
"He's wide open!" Usopp observed as he fired at Mr. 3 while he was still attacking Luffy, "TAKE THIS! GUNPOWDER STAR!"
GULP!
Mr. 5 stepped in front of Mr. 3, opened his mouth and swallowed Usopp's round.
BOOOM!
The Bomb Man's stomach expanded when Usopp's round exploded but he remained unharmed.
SKISH!
At the same time, Luffy threw himself out of the way of Mr. 3's harpoon which kept going and smashed the handle of the sword.
KRESH!
"HE ATE IT!?" Usopp exclaimed while Luffy landed safely on the ground.
"That tasted nasty," Mr. 5 commented, "You use cheap gunpowder."
"GOTCHA NOW!" Luffy exclaimed as he shot his hands at Mr. 3, "GUM GUM… BAZOOOKA!"
"CANDLE WALL!"
GLOOOP!
Mr. 3 formed a large wax wall in front of him which remained unscathed as Luffy's fists smashed in it.
WHAAM!
"HEY! KNOCK THAT OFF!" Luffy complained.
"That's my line!" Mr. 3 retorted, "I won't allow you to get in the way of my plans! CANDLE LOCK!"
GLOOP!
"Again?" Luffy questioned when he recognized the attack. "Wait a minute…" The rubber man smirked and stuck his arm into the wax stream and a candle-shaped block formed on his fist. "SHISHISHISHI! THANKS FOR THE HAMMER!" Luffy pulled his wax-coated arm back then threw it. "GUUUM… GUUUM…"
"CANDLE WALL!" Mr. 3 quickly erected a wax wall to shield himself.
GLOOP!
"HAAAMMEEEEERR!"
Luffy's wax hammer smashed into the wall.
WHAAAAM!
"HA!" Mr. 3 taunted.
KRAK-KRAK-KRAK…
Mr. 3's eyes widened behind his glasses as the wax wall started to crack.
KROOSH!
Luffy's hand burst through a hole as the wax hammer on his arm shattered the wax wall. Luffy's fist smashed into Mr. 3's face.
KA-POW!
"WHOA!" Miss Valentine yelped and ducked as Mr. 3 went flying over her head out of the clearing. "That little brat beat Mr. 3! He's stronger than he looks!"
"I felt Straw Hat's punch back at Whiskey Peak," Mr. 5 stated, "I doubt that smart-ass could take it."
"Nice hit!" Sabo exclaimed.
"I wish I could've done that myself," Brogy admitted.
"GREAT, LUFFY!" Nami cheered, "NOW SMASH THE REST OF THIS THING AND GET US OUT OF HERE!"
"No," Luffy refused.
"STOP FOOLING AROUND!" Nami berated him. "GET US OUT OF HERE!"
"I don't wanna," Luffy replied.
"Colors Trap… Betrayal Black…" Miss Goldenweek intoned.
"What the heck just happened?" Usopp wondered. "We've gotta get them out of there…"
"You're too late," Mr. 5 told him, "Your friend's already fallen into a trap."
"That's right," Miss Valentine confirmed, "Take a look at his feet…"
"His feet…" Usopp questioned as he lowered his goggles and spotted a black symbol under Luffy's feet. "Huh… there's a painted symbol…"
"That's no ordinary paint," Miss Valentine informed him.
"In short…" Mr. 5 concluded, "You and your friends are doomed. SPIT CANNON!"
PTOI!
"RUN FOR IT CARUE!" Usopp screamed as he and Carue raced out of the way of Mr. 5 spit which exploded on the ground.
KA-BOOOOM!
"HEY! WAIT FOR ME TO GET ON FIRST!" Usopp hollered as he chased after the terrified duck.
"After them!" Mr. 5 growled as he and Miss Valentine chased the duo out of the clearing.
"THIS IS YOUR DOING, MISS GOLDENWEEK!" Vivi realized.
"I kind of figured," Sabo said, "She's the only one left."
"That's my Colors Trap Betrayal Black…" Miss Goldenweek explained, "Anyone who touches that paint will betray their friends no matter how important they are to them."
"Miss Goldenweek is a realist painter who can realistically portray even the very colors of emotions," Vivi explained. "When a person touches her special paintings it strongly implants an emotion into the person's subconscious."
"Oh great," Zoro groaned as he remembered how effective Jango's hypnotism had been against Luffy, "Hypnotism… that's super effective against a weak minded idiot like him…"
"I seem to remember it working well on another pair of idiots," Nami said as she eyed Zoro and Sabo.
"She's that good at painting?" Sabo questioned. "Why didn't you say something sooner? Oi! Brogy! Did the little girl interfere in your fight with Dorry?"
"No…" the giant admitted, "I'd say the bomb man and the little man with the wax were the ones that interfered in our battle."
"So you wouldn't hold it against me if I tried to recruit her then?" Sabo inquired, "Luffy really wants an Artist for our crew."
"She's just a baby," Brogy noted, "A brave crew like yours would be a great alternative to the coward she's with now."
"I'm not a baby…" Miss Goldenweek felt the need to object, "I'm fourteen."
"Is this really your plan?" Zoro asked.
"Well if we can recruit the Artist she'll drop the hypnosis on Luffy and we can get out of here," Sabo said, "HEY! Artist-girl! Sorry about the spanking thing… but if you let us out of here we'll let you join our crew! Luffy really wants an Artist."
"No thanks," Miss Goldenweek refused. "Baroque Works kills anyone that goes against the organization. You guys don't seem to be in a very good position."
"We can get out of here without her help!" Nami insisted, "All we have to do is get Luffy to step off of that paint. LUFFY! GET OFF THAT PAINT!"
"No, LUFFY DON'T!" Vivi called out, "PLEASE DON'T STEP OFF THAT PAINT!"
"What're you saying?" Nami asked.
"WE DON'T WANT YOU TO SAVE US!" Vivi shouted.
"Oh yeah?" Luffy retorted as he did the opposite of what Vivi wanted and stepped off the symbol. "OH! Did something happen to me just now?"
"Oh… I see," Zoro realized, "Reverse psychology."
"Alright! I'll smash that cake now!" Luffy exclaimed. "GUM GUM… BA—BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Colors Trap… Laughter Yellow…" Miss Goldenweek announced.
"SHISHISHISHISHI!" Luffy laughed as he rolled on the floor laughing.
"It's on his clothes now!" Nami realized when she noticed the yellow symbol on the back of Luffy's vest. "LUFFY! TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT!"
"Nah, I just wanna laugh!" Luffy replied, "SHISHISHISHISHISHI!"
"Crap…" Zoro cursed, "if that laughing idiot's our only hope of getting out of here… we're screwed!"
"QUUUAAAACCK!"
The four captives looked up as Usopp raced into the clearing in Carue. "AAAAH! RUN FOR IT!"
"USOPP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Brogy barked at the terrified pirate.
"M-Master Brogy?" Usopp stammered as he skidded to a stop in front of the trapped giant.
"I thought you wanted to be a brave warrior?" Brogy questioned, "Why are you running from your enemy like a coward? Why are you running when your friends need you?"
"I… but that guy has Devil Fruit Powers!" Usopp protested, "He'll blow me up! He swallowed one of my Gunpowder Stars and complained that it tasted bad!"
"So what?" Zoro scoffed, "Are you a man or a coward? Keep fighting."
"If gunpowder won't work then use something else!" Nami suggested, "You've gotta have more than one kind of round in that bag of yours."
"Usopp, grab Bonnie!" Sabo advised, "She likes you. She'll help!"
"We're counting on your Usopp!" Vivi chimed in. "We need you now more than ever!"
"SHISHISHISHISHI!" Luffy continued to laugh helplessly.
"…" Miss Goldenweek silently watched as the captives attempted to motivate their cowardly friend.
"I… I… right… I'm not a coward!" Usopp resolved. "What kind of man would I be if I couldn't save my friends when it really counted? I'M CAPTAIN USOPP! A BRAVE WARRIOR OF THE SEA! COME ON, CARUE! Let's get that rifle!"
"QUACK!" Carue spun around and dashed for the picnic blanket.
"Hmm… courage," Miss Goldenweek idly mused, "I wonder if I could make a color for that…"
"SPIT CANNON!"
PTOI!
A wad of spit splattered on Usopp's chest and exploded.
KA-BOOOOOOM!
Carue was caught in the explosion and was blasted backwards.
WHAM!
The sniper and the duck steamrolled the laughing pirate and knocked him on his ass.
The yellow paint on Luffy's vest was smudged and he snapped out of his trance.
"GAH! USOPP! BIRD!" Luffy shrieked when he spotted the charred duo. Luffy glared across the clearing at Mr. 5 as he walked out of the trees with Miss Valentine. "I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS, BOMB GUY! GUM… GUM…"
"Colors Trap… Bullfight Red…"
"…BAZOOKA!"
Luffy lashed out and slammed his fists straight down into the ground.
WHAM!
"Huh?" Luffy gasped as he stared down at the red symbol that he'd punched.
"That's my Bullfight Red," Miss Goldenweek informed him. "You'll just keep attacking that symbol like a bull to a red cape."
"YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" Luffy shouted, "GUUM GUUUM… BAZOOOKA!"
WHAM!
Luffy once again smashed his fists in to the red symbol on the ground.
"Having fun?" Miss Goldenweek asked.
"It's no use! She's too strong!" Nami realized.
"Kyahahaha!" Miss Valentine cackled, "I see you've got things well in hand."
"I just need a finishing touch," Miss Goldenweek stated, "I'll combine Sadness Blue with the Laughter Yellow that's already on his shirt to make something special… Colors Trap… Calming Green!"
SWISH!
"YOoooooo…" the Calming Green took effect and all the fight drained out of Luffy. He was left standing there with a calm smile on his face.
Miss Goldenweek grabbed his wrist, "Come." Luffy calmly followed Miss Goldenweek as she led him back to the picnic blanket. "Pour the tea…"
"What're you doing?" Mr. 5 asked as Luffy poured tea for himself and Miss Goldenweek.
"Straw Hat has been neutralized," Miss Goldenweek pointed out, "So now there's no one left to break them out. I've done my part. You two can take over and make sure none of the others get out."
"This tea is good…" Luffy said as he sipped from his cup.
Nami sighed, "Anyone got any ideas?"
Zoro shook his head, "Nope, we're screwed. I bet you guys wish you picked better poses."
"Are you still going on about that?" Vivi scolded him.
"Hey! Can I have my rifle now?" Sabo requested.
"Absolutely not," Mr. 5 refused.
"I wasn't talking to you!" Sabo snapped, "I was talking to the blonde with the cute laugh."
"Me?" Miss Valentine questioned.
"Of course," Sabo replied, "I learned my lesson from Whiskey Peak. I'm not ignoring you."
"Look, blondie, I'm not—"
"Save your breath, bastard!" Mr. 5 interrupted his partner. "You're not tricking anyone."
"Oi, don't be rude," Sabo reprimanded the male agent, "Let the lady speak for herself."
"I can handle this, Mr. 5," Miss Valentine assured her partner then turned back to Sabo. "I'm not just gonna hand you a loaded weapon."
"Look, you've got us in a really bad situation," Sabo pointed out, "And Zoro had a point about the posing thing. If I'm gonna die here… It wouldn't feel right unless I did it with that rifle in my arms. Come on, your codename is Miss Valentine… have a heart!"
Nami didn't know what Sabo was doing. But he clearly had some kind of plan which was way more than what she had. So she decided to support him. "It's true! I couldn't imagine him without his rifle."
Zoro and Vivi realized that something was going on they both chimed in as well.
"Same goes for me," Zoro agreed, "He wouldn't be the rifle-freak without his rifle."
"I just met them a few days ago," Vivi admitted, "And even I'll agree to that."
"I'm not stupid," Miss Valentine insisted, "The second I hand you your gun, you'll turn it around and open fire on us."
"I won't," Sabo assured her, "Look… I keep all my ammo in my coat. Uugghh…" Sabo groaned as he made visibly strained movements to remove his wax-stained coat and dropped it in front of him. "Sorry… I can't move much after inhaling all that wax…"
"That's a lie…" Nami realized, "He was holding his breath so he didn't get much of the wax in his lungs… He must be trying to lure her in closer to catch her off guard…"
Miss Valentine slowly approached the base of the Candle Service Set.
"Miss Valentine…" Mr. 5 warned his partner.
"I'm handling this!" Miss Valentine snapped. She cautiously snatched Sabo's blue coat and tossed it over to the picnic blanket behind her then she narrowed her eyes at Sabo. "How do I know you don't have any more bullets stashed in your other clothes?"
"All of my bullets are in that coat," Sabo stated then flashed a roguish grin and winked at the blonde woman. "But if you don't believe me… you're welcome to come up here and pat me down."
Miss Valentine blinked, "Are you flirting with me?"
Sabo smirked and raised an eyebrow, "Maybe… Is it working?"
"Not really," Miss Valentine replied, "Are you actually this desperate?"
"Yes," Sabo immediately answered. "That rifle means a lot to me."
"Kyahaha!" Miss Valentine giggled, "That's refreshing honesty. You know what? I'll throw you a bone."
"You're actually going to fall for that?" Mr. 5 asked his partner.
"Can't you let me enjoy this?" Miss Valentine complained as she looked back at her partner. "What's he going to do to me?"
The blonde Officer Agent missed Sabo mouthing the words 'for you' at the picnic blanket. He'd also timed it for the exact moment that Miss Goldenweek had her eyes closed while she was sipping from her tea cup.
"He can barely move," Miss Valentine pointed out, "And he's no use to me dead. So I might as well get my kicks in while he's still warm and breathing."
"Just to check…" Sabo said, "By 'kicks' you don't mean actual kicking do you?"
"Nope," Miss Valentine replied as she grinned and cracked her knuckles, "I'm going to thoroughly check you for any spare bullets you might be hiding."
"You're being a damn fool," Mr. 5 insisted, "But since one of us still needs to act like a professional… I'll use my insurance policy…" The Bomb Man fished into his pocket and pulled out a handgun.
"You've got a gun?" Sabo questioned, "Why the hell didn't you use that from the start? You've been holding out on me, nose picker!"
"This is a flintlock .44 caliber six-shot revolver," Mr. 5 explained, "They're all the rage in the South Blue. And with my powers… I don't even need bullets. I didn't want to waste it on you punks. But after what you did to my hand back at Whiskey Peak… maybe I'm hoping you'll give me an excuse to shoot you." The Bomb Man snapped the revolving chamber open and spat into it.
PTOI!
"Go ahead Miss Valentine," Mr. 5 prompted, "If he tries anything funny I'll blow him to bits."
"Thanks, I guess…" Miss Valentine replied as she climbed up the layered cake-like structure and eventually stood in front of Sabo. "Arms out…"
"Uggh…" Sabo made a show of grimacing as he slowly spread his 'stiff' arms.
"She fell for it..." Nami thought silently as she looked away from the two blondes. The former pirate thief had sometimes employed the same strategy on the pirates that she'd robbed in order to get them to drop their guard. She certainly couldn't fault Sabo for doing the same in a role reversal scenario.
Miss Valentine stepped closer and grabbed Sabo's arm and began patting it down. She notably took a bit longer when she reached his upper arm. "Not bad. I was expecting you to be muscular with the way you sent my flying when I weighed ten thousand kilograms."
Miss Valentine slipped around behind him and patted down his back then she went lower.
"Oh!" Vivi gasped and her wax covered cheeks flushed slightly.
"I don't have any pockets back there…" Sabo reminded the Officer Agent.
"I'm being thorough," Miss Valentine insisted.
"Well this isn't awkward at all," Zoro remarked, "I've gotta stand here and listen while she fondles you."
"Suck it up," Sabo retorted, "I've had to deal with your puddle of blood slowly dripping towards me ever since your dumbass idea to hack through your legs."
"Boys, don't fight," Miss Valentine chided them as she came around Sabo and searched his other arm. She glanced over at Zoro, "I can do you next if you want."
"I'll pass," Zoro immediately replied.
"Your loss," Miss Valentine said as she knelt down in front of Sabo and grabbed his leg where it was stuck in the wax then began to work her way up it.
"Ugh!" Sabo bit back a yelp when the blonde's hand wandered a bit too high. His eyes darted across the clearing and sought out the rifle lying on the picnic blanket. He shot an apologetic look to his girlfriend while Miss Valentine worked her way up his other leg until she was standing.
"Alright, now the good part…" Miss Valentine resolved as she eyed Sabo's chest.
"Yup," Sabo agreed as he caught Miss Valentine by surprise and snapped his arms in with absolutely no sign of stiffness.
"WAAAH!" Miss Valentine yelped when Sabo grabbed her and hoisted her over his shoulder.
FWIP!
"I KNEW IT!" Mr. 5 exclaimed.
"What're you gonna do, Mr. 5?" Sabo challenged the Bomb Man as he shifted Miss Valentine so she was now hanging over his shoulder in front of him, "Shoot your partner?"
"Put me down! Put me down!" Miss Valentine demanded as she struggled in Sabo's tight grip.
"I'd suggest changing your weight to something heavy," Sabo advised his captive, "Or else this is really gonna hurt."
"What're you—" Miss Valentine started to ask but was cut off when Sabo swung her down at the wax trapping his feet. "FIVE THOUSAND KILOS!"
BOOOM!
Sabo slammed the five thousand kilogram woman head-first into the wax and managed to crack it.
Krek-krek…
"'Re you still hittin' on me..." Miss Valentine slurred.
"Uuggh…" Sabo grunted as he hefted the heavy woman back up then smashed her down again.
BOOOOM!
Krek-krek-krek…
The cracks in the wax increased and the hold on Sabo's feet loosened.
"I bet ya do this t' aaall th' guurlz..." Miss Valentine groaned groggily.
"One more should do it…" Sabo announced as he gritted his teeth and lifted the dizzy blonde a third time.
"Sorry Miss Valentine," Mr. 5 apologized as he watched his partner get manhandled, "But you're the one who fell for his trick." Mr. 5 pulled the trigger and fired his revolver at Sabo and his own partner.
BANG!
Mr. 5's spit impacted with Miss Valentine's back and exploded.
KA-BOOOOOOOM!
"I'm not going to let him escape because of your foolishness," Mr. 5 resolved as he stared at the inferno that had engulfed his partner.
SKISH!
Sabo came flying out of the explosion and dove towards the picnic blanket. He dropped into a roll and snatched Bonnie off the blanket before Mr. 5 could get off another shot.
"You blew up your own partner," Sabo remarked as he looked over at Miss Valentine who was lying charred and unconscious in the spot Sabo had once been stuck in. "That was cold. But also kind of warm… you ended up melting all the wax that was on me."
"You're the one the lured her in and used her like a battering ram," Mr. 5 growled.
"She's not my partner," Sabo pointed out. "She's part of the group trying to kill me and my crew so I wasn't willing to 'handle with care'."
"No kidding..." Zoro grumbled as he peaked over at Miss Valentine as much as his stiff neck would allow, "Woman-beating jerk might've given her a concussion."
"I'm actually glad he refused to fight me now…" Vivi admitted as she glanced warily down at the unconscious Baroque Works Officer Agent.
"Not very honorable…" Brogy commented.
"Like these Baroque Works creeps care about honor," Nami scoffed, "The dumb blonde had it coming. Now that Sabo's free maybe he can get us out of here."
"I don't know if the Bomb-guy is gonna let him," Zoro observed.
"Here…" Miss Goldenweek said as she handed Luffy the picture she'd just painted of Sabo leaping towards them out of a fiery explosion.
"This painting… is good…" Luffy said with the same calm smile.
"You know what? I'm actually glad you got free," Mr. 5 confessed as he cautiously eyed Sabo's rifle through his sunglasses. "You and I still have a score to settle."
"Then how about we settle this the old fashioned way?" Sabo offered as he chanced a glance at Brogy, "A duel. That is… if you have even a shred of honor after putting that bomb in Dorry's rum."
"That was Mr. 3's idea," Mr. 5 informed him, "But the truth is… I don't really care about who I kill. It's all part of the job. However, my professionalism won't stop me from getting some personal enjoyment out of blasting you to smithereens."
"Usopp!" Sabo called out, "How did you and Daddy the Father do your duel? Did someone shout draw? Or did you walk ten paces?"
"Ughh…" Usopp groaned as he sat up behind Carue. "Well I already told you that it didn't end that way. But it started out with him giving me a pistol. We were supposed to walk ten paces and then fire."
"Does that work for you?" Sabo asked his opponent.
"Fine," Mr. 5 agreed, "A duel to the death."
"Hey Brogy," Sabo called out to the giant, "You're the duel master on this island. Would you mind counting the ten steps for us?"
"You actually trust that little rat to abide by the rules?" Brogy asked.
"Not really," Sabo admitted, "But I want this to be a proper duel."
"Fine then," Brogy agreed, "Duelists! Face off!"
Sabo and Mr. 5 kept their respective guns pointed at the ground as they walked up to each other until they were standing face-to-face.
"I hope you've made peace," Mr. 5 said, "When I'm done with you… I'll ship whatever's left to Mr. 0 in a wooden box."
"I've got important things to do," Sabo replied, "I'm not gonna die here."
"ABOUT FACE!" Brogy barked. Sabo and Mr. 5 turned to face in opposite directions. "ONE… TWO…"
The two gunslingers took a step away from each other every time the giant counted.
"THREE… FOUR…"
"Sorry about the blonde…" Sabo whispered to Bonnie.
"FIVE… SIX…"
"She meant nothing to me."
"SEVEN… EIGHT…"
"I swear it was all so I could get out of there to get to you."
"NINE… TEN!"
Sabo and Mr. 5 both spun at the final count and time slowed to a crawl.
"QUICK DRAW!" Bonnie fired on her own and saved Sabo critical fractions of a second he would have normally spent pulling her trigger.
KER-CHOW!
BANG!
"Uggh…" Mr. 5 managed to fire his own gun before Sabo's round struck his stomach.
SWISH!
Sabo had a precious half a second to lean to the side to avoid Mr. 5's spit which sailed passed him.
TWO SECONDS…
This time Sabo actually pulled Bonnie's trigger himself. "RETURN FIRE!"
KER-CHOW!
"UUGH!" Mr. 5 dropped his gun when the second round obliterated his shoulder.
Mr. 5's spit finally hit the ground behind Sabo and exploded.
KA-BOOOOM!
FOUR SECONDS…
Sabo closed his eyes and pulled Bonnie's trigger a final time, "BURST FIRE…"
KER-CHOW!
The third round punctured Mr. 5's chest and he dropped to the ground.
FIVE SECONDS…
"Hmph," Zoro grunted, "All that build up for just five seconds of action. This is why duels should be fought with swords."
"TOP HAT IS THE VICTOR!" Brogy announced.
Vivi's face had gone pale as she glanced at the two Officer Agents that Sabo had brutally dispatched. "Really glad he refused to fight me…"
"Did… you kill him?" Usopp inquired.
"Looks like it," Sabo confirmed as he walked over and inspected the body. "He said he wanted a duel to the death. He would've done the same to me. At least he died with some honor. After what he did to Dorry… it's more than he deserves."
"How did you know he wasn't going to turn before the tenth step?" Usopp asked. He might have omitted the part where he'd tried that against Daddy the Father when he told Sabo the story.
"I didn't," Sabo admitted, "But I never paid that no mind; you were there."
"Oh, well, of course!" Usopp happily agreed, "I've always got your back, Sabro!"
"Yeah right…" Nami scoffed, "You were hiding behind Carue the whole time. GET US OUT OF HERE!"
"Mr. 3's gonna be really mad when he gets back…" Miss Goldenweek noted as she surveyed the two fallen Officer Agents as well as the two enemy pirates and the duck that were opposing her.
"That duel… was good…" Luffy said as he continued to struggle against the hypnotic paint.
So once again one of Sabo's harebrained schemes pays off. First he held his breath to keep himself from inhaling much wax and then he managed to use the Demolition Duo to escape Mr. 3's wax deathtrap. He ended up in a situation where he and Mr. 5 faced off in a duel to the death like a pair of gunslingers at High Noon.
Speaking of gun-slinging outlaws… Do any of you classic movie buffs recognize Sabo's last line? I only changed one word to fit my version.
Silver signing off