Goodbyes Part I:
Sigrid Lapierre, 17, District Two Female
When the Peacekeeper lets go of my arm after accompanying me to my Goodbye Room, I walk to the middle and take in my surroundings, after taking a seat on the four-legged gold coated chair. Three people come barging in through the door, and none of them are the people that I expected to visit me first.
Valencia enters first, followed by her two children, Aemilia and Nero. Aemilia pouts as soon as she sees my face, and brings her hands up to her chest in an act of childish defiance. Her brother, on the other hand, just laughs at her and begins pointing his fingers.
Valencia just glares daggers at me and begins to bitch just when we meet eye-contact. ''You just couldn't let her Volunteer, could you? You just had to go and disregard my pleads and make me look bad. Do you know how much of a fool I look like now, with my child not being the Volunteer to represent our District after all my talk?!''
Keeping my mouth shut, I just tap my foot and lean back against my chair. I take a deep breath and then stare into Valencia's – my stepmother – eyes. Shrugging my shoulders, I don't even bother to utter out a word. ''Well, are you not going to say anything?'' She shouts. ''Speak to me!''
Oh, how low class she is. This woman really believes that her children and her are all that, but none of that is true. I feel sorry for her. She's just so pitiful and annoying, I can't see how anyone could actually like her – especially not my father. Not only is everything that I said before the truth, but she's also a gold digging bitch. ''I wanted to Volunteer.''
''WHAT?!'' Aemilia screams out, her mouth stretched out open. ''YOU VOLUNTEERED BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO? WHAT ABOUT ME? I WANTED TO VOLUNTEER, BUT NO, YOU JUST HAD TO DO IT DURING MY LAST YEAR, YOU STUPID BITCH!''
''I'm sorry, Aemilia,'' I tilt my head. ''You're a great person, you know. I just really wanted to take this one chance at Volunteering. But if you want me to be honest, you're mild at best with weapons, but everything else is amazing; like your attitude, and your looks. You're great, Aemilia.''
Peasant.
''Ha! She said you're mild at best,'' Nero laughs. Him and Aemilia both begin quarreling so I just sit back and watch, trying to hold in my suppressed chuckles. Aemilia goes to slap him, but Nero quickly ducks and twists his sister's arm. ''Don't touch me, bitch. This is why you weren't chosen, because you suck!''
''I DO NOT-'' Aemilia screams as Nero twists tighter. ''AGH, LET GO!'' I let out a sound that's mixed between a cough and a sneeze, and this sets Valencia off. Aemilia and Nero are both on the floor now, wrestling and rolling around on the ground like the true dimwits they are. They're beneath me, the scum of District Two, actually.
''You-!'' Valencia points, but I quickly move her hand away from my face.
''You actually look pretty today, Valencia!'' She steps back, looking hurt by my backhanded compliment. ''Seriously, you look so great for your age. And that outfit, I absolutely love it! You're so brave for wearing that! Sometimes I don't even recognize you because of how beautiful you look!''
Stammering, she looks to find the words but comes up just short of speaking her mind. The poor bitch, she doesn't know how much lower she actually is. She's like a puny ant; she should just be squashed on the floor. After giving up, she storms out of the Goodbye Room along with her two intolerable children. Before Aemilia leaves, she looks back at me, while Nero is already gone, laughing his ass off after making her look untidy by attacking her, and grunts as she storms off.
The next person to come in is also someone I didn't expect – my real mother. The look on my face does a complete three-sixty and I end up frowning angrily. I didn't believe what Valencia called my real mother, I never wanted to believe it, but I now know that it's true. Everything about everyone is true.
''Sigrid...'' My mother starts. ''How are you..?''
Despite my bitterness towards her, and how ashamed of her I am, I don't let any of that get in the way of speaking to her regularly. ''I'm doing fine, mother. Being chosen as District Two's female representative really makes me happy. What about you?''
''I'm proud of you, Sigrid,'' she feigns. That's not what she wants to talk about at all. ''You're a great trainee, and I know that you're gonna do big things in the Arena. The way you carry yourself, and how you're so independent and mature... Sigrid, you're amazing, okay.''
''Oh, it's nothing, really. I'm flattered that you think that, but it's nothing at all.'' Leaning forward, I place both of my hands under my chin and give my mother a death glare.
''I know how you feel about me and your father... and... I'd just like to say that I'm sorry about everything that's happened to you – from us separating, to you walking in on me with...''
''Yeah, you slept with another married man, despite you being remarried, I know. But, you know, I didn't believe Valencia when she first called you a tramp, but sometimes you don't expect some things told to you about people to be true, do you, now?''
''S-Sigrid, please forgive me,'' she pleads. ''I'm sorry that you saw that, but trust me, I've changed. Let's just forget about it, okay?'' I nod my head, but really, I'm not agreeing to this at all. This is something that I hold against her, something that I know about her, and that everyone really just does use each other. How much of a shitty person can you be to cheat on your spouse, especially your current one who doesn't know of your history? ''D-Do you have a token, I have something for yo-''
''No, I don't need an item from you'' I stop her from finishing her sentence. ''I got one on my own. The ring that Dad gave Valencia when he asked her to take his hand in marriage,'' I bring up, then pull it out of my pocket. ''That's what I'll be taking into the Arena.''
Letting out a chuckle, my mother then quickly turns around when a Peacekeeper opens up the door and tells her to get out. She looks down at me and smiles shyly. ''I love you, Sigrid.'' Smiling, I wave her off and take a careful observation at what she's wearing. A small smile creeps up on my face.
''Hey, Mom.'' She quickly turns around and looks me in the eye. ''Stripes don't usually work well on someone with your build, but it works okay on you.'' She gives me a depressed look and then turns away.
''Hey,'' says the man of the hour. When I look at my father, I see no sign of emotion on his face. He's always been like this, terrible with not only relationships but with emotion. He has no regard for how I'm feeling right now, and I can't tell if he's happy for me or not. ''You know, it's not gonna be the same without you these next two weeks.''
''No, you guys will be fine on your own, believe me,'' I reassure. ''It'll be the exact same, like I never left. You just gotta believe that.''
''Well, that's true, Sigrid.'' I was expecting him to say something like that. Saying that me leaving to the Capitol is gonna be like I never left was just a play on words, but he hasn't changed a single bit. ''But hey, when you get back, we'll have even more money than we do now, you hear me? With my amazing business skills and you winning the Hunger Games, you, me, and the rest of the family can all move into the Victors' Village together and become even more amazing. Who cares about the rest of the world, right?''
There's a blank stare on my face right now, his words making me angry. He's so self-absorbed and thinks so highly of his work. But the one thing he doesn't get is that if I do win, Valencia and her pack of infants aren't moving in the Victors' Village with me. I Volunteered for a reason, and it wasn't for the fame or the money – I want to get away from them.
''Just think about how thankful Valencia will be when you-''
''Excuse me, father, but Valencia will not be thankful or grateful of anything I do, and I hope that you understand that,'' I address. ''If I do win, and excuse me in advance, she'd only move in because of the luxury, father. She's someone who just wants your money, not someone who's loyal and loving to you.''
''Sigrid, please, I know that,'' he hushes me. ''But it's nothing personal. As long as I'm not affected by it, then everything is fine. You just need to learn to understand that, poor child.'' See... People like him really tick me off, but they're who they are. What can I do about it? It's not worth risking my temper and time to change them.
I'm just glad he didn't catch on to how I actually felt while putting on those fake smiles of mine. My smile tells so many lies, but on the inside, I really don't care. A Peacekeeper comes in and tells him to get out. Doing as he was instructed, he walks out without sparing me a second glance while Ismene and Hedda take his place.
Quickly, Ismene grabs my hand and starts congratulating me. ''I didn't really think you were gonna do it, but I should've expected you to. Someone as amazing as you deserves this, Sigrid!'' It's like she's clung onto me. Ismene makes me feel like someone who's famous, and she's my admirer, but I really don't care to deal with this.
''Thank you, but it's not that big of a deal, Ismene,'' I admit. Pushing her away from me softly, I tell her, ''Since I'm leaving now, just promise me that you'll continue to do well in the Academy. Continue to work hard without me and maintain that passing grade, understood?''
''Yes!'' She says, nodding her head vigorously. At the corner of my eye, I catch Hedda just staring. ''I'll carry on what you taught me, and maybe next year I'll be able to Volunteer for the Games and win. Just like you, I plan on going all the way. You surely will, Sigrid, and I can't—-''
''Okay!'' Hedda yells. ''Shut up, Ismene, she gets it.''
''Now, now, Hedda, we can't be mean, okay?'' Ismene turns to me and begins laughing, then nods her head. She looks back at Hedda, then back at me, raising her eyebrows, curious as to if Hedda is trying to say something. ''Ismene, I'm glad you came to visit me, but Hedda and I would like some privacy. I hope that you can understand.''
''Of course I can!'' Ismene turns on her heels and places her hand on the handle of the door. She quickly turns to glance at me and flashes me a smile. ''Thank you... for everything, Sigird.'' After that, she opens up the door and leaves. Hedda scoffs and rolls her eyes. I'm doing the same thing as she is on the inside right now. Honestly, though, Ismene is too soft and fragile for District Two. Sometimes I wonder how she's managed to live up to seventeen years of her life.
''Go out there and kill it, Sigrid,'' she demands. ''Don't be a bitch and end up Volunteering for nothing. If you die, then you're pathetic and worthless, got it?''
''Family issues getting to you again, Hedda?''
''Shut up, bitch. That's a lot of mouth coming from someone such as yourself?'' Quickly, I get up and ask her what that's supposed to mean. ''It means that you could be better, but you're not. If you die, I'll make sure to stand up to your shadow.''
''Whatever, Hedda,'' I sit back down, then cross my legs together. ''For a top class student, you're extremely fake. How hard you are on the outside contrasts majorly to how soft you are on the inside. But you know what, I can respect that about you. I may have never told you that, but I do.''
Hedda nods her head. ''I respect you as well. So prove me wrong when you get in that Arena. When you make it back, I'll be waiting for you. And when the next year hits, I'll volunteer and come back victorious as well.''
The both of us grin widely, but our expressions quickly disappear when a Peacekeeper barges into the room - rudely, I might add - and grabs her by her hands. ''Get off of me!'' She grits, after elbowing the Peacekeeper's chest and stomping on his boot. ''It's called personal space, something we all have. Learn what it is before you go on to touching people!''
Her footsteps are the last things that I hear before the Peacekeeper roughly shuts the door closed. Not even the wind blowing outside is loud enough for me to hear. Nothing but silence now, which gives me time to think to myself. Volunteering for this was worth it, I know that
The Games are my only way out of this hideous life of mine. Escaping is what I need to do.
A better life is what I seek.
Cassia Abbey, 18, District Five Female
''Hey, are you okay?'' Beckam asks me. No, Beckham, with an h? Wait, no, his name is Beston, Breckon, Beckman, Breckett? Oh, who cares? One thing, though, I don't understand his question. Why wouldn't I be okay? I mean, just look at me. Look at it... Look at all of this.
''Yeah, why wouldn't I be okay?'' I ask, slipping my hand away from his and begin wiping his disgusting sweat on my long, sparkling hot pink pants. ''Ugh, your hand touched my nail. Please don't do that ever again. But yeah, why wouldn't I be okay? I'm going into the Hunger Games, and- w-wait a minute, I'm going into the Hunger Games!''
''Yeah...'' What's his name gives me a sorry look, but then quickly changes it by shining his perfectly white teeth and makes it look as if a smile is stuck on his face completely. Psh, what a show off. Those perfect teeth may be nice and all, but they're nothing compared to me and how fashionable I am. ''It's okay, though. I know you'll do good.''
Two Peacekeepers grab both Beckman and me and force us into the Justice Building. When we get inside, they separate the both of us and place me into an individual and solitary Goodbye Room. The shade of sunlight that enters this room is absolutely disgusting. It's even more horrendous with this disgusting furniture. Some of the items in here are cute, but others... they make me wanna vomit.
Approaching the table cloth to my left, I prepare myself to completely take it off and fold it to a state where it actually looks presentable, but my family walks in and stare me dead in the eye. Dad walks to me slowly and pulls me closer to him, wrapping his arms around me. His embrace is warm, and his big, strong arms seem very protective.
Looking up, I notice my little sister Alexis watching me. She won't say a word, that's to be expected. ''Because she's such a little bitch!'' I growl, but that wasn't meant to be said out loud. Quickly shutting my trap, I squeal and fall back, placing both of my hands above my mouth.
Dad looks at me and questions me for a little bit. ''Honey, watch your language,'' he says. ''I know that this Reaping stuff is really hard for you, and that you most likely don't want to be in a death match, but there's no reason to curse. My perfect angel would never use language like that, so please, refrain from using it around us, okay?''
''Yes, Daddy,'' I agree, nodding my head furiously.
''W-Why would you say that to me, Cassia? I literally j-just got here and you're a-already trying to start some conflict!'' She whimpers. My parents don't bother to pay her any attention. She was never planned - a terrible rubber-free accident - so you can guess why. All the spotlight goes to me, me, me, and that's how I like it. Fuck everyone else, all I care about is myself and nobody else.
''Karen,'' Daddy says.
Mom lets out a sigh and crosses her arms together. ''What is it, Corey? We really need to hurry this up, I have to get back to work on the new genome type for the Capitol mutations. I can't waste much time in here, Cassia can handle herself, and I really, really don't want to talk to her right now...''
She whispers this but I still overhear her. ''Mom, Dad,'' Alexis calls out. For an extended period of time, Mom and Dad continue talking to each other about work and all this smart shit. I don't understand what this genome stuff is – some type of food, maybe? But what does food have to do with mutations? Maybe they plan on actually feeding the mutts in the Arena so that the tributes can live!
''Listen, Cassia,'' Mom interrupts my thinking. Alexis says something again but Mom completely blocks her out. ''There are twenty-four tributes in the Hunger Games, you know that.'' Nodding my head, I repeat exactly what she just said.
''Yes, Mom, there are thirty-six tributes in the Hunger Games, I know that. I'm not that stupid to the point where I can't even count. Daddy, do you see how she treats me?'' Clapping my hands, I gaze listlessly at his coat and point to it. ''Water bottle, Daddy, I need that! My throat is wet and moist, so that means I need to drink something ASMAP!''
''ASMAP?'' Alexis questions.
Turning to her, I begin explaining what the acronym means. ''As soon as fucking possible, Alexis! Dammit, get with the program!''
''...WHAT?! CASSIA, THAT MAKES NO SENS-''
''Here,'' Daddy hands me his water bottle. Taking the cap off, I begin chugging the drink and wipe my mouth as the cool, wet beverage drips down my chin and onto my chest. ''Anyway, do you have a token or...?''
''MOTHER!'' I quickly get up but stumble on my feet. Unfortunately, I trip over myself and fall right at the feet of my mother. Staring up at her, I point to the golden sun charm necklace that's placed on a gold chain. ''That...'' I utter. ''Daddy, please tell-''
''Fine, take it!'' Mom grips the necklace and forces it from her neck. She tosses it to me, and trying to catch it, I end up failing miserably and the chain slams into my eye. Without a final word, Mom quickly turns around and exits the Goodbye Room.
''See you, sweetie,'' Dad says and follows right after her. Alexis calls out for my parents to wait for her, but like usual, she gets no response and has to catch up to them herself. Turning around, she stares at me one more time and glares. Unhesitantly, though, she changes her expression and says, ''Love you.''
''Bye, bitch, don't come back!'' I wave. She frowns and turns, but before she closes the door completely, I change my statement. ''Just kidding, you know I... actually love you! I'll see you when I get back, okay? Because I'm definitely coming back, because yeah..! Remember, ASMAP! I'm coming back ASMAP!''
The smile on her face fades and her shadow disappears. Coming in after her is my boyfriend, Zayne, and my two friends Luella and Sally. ''Zayne!'' I yell out, tromping my boots down the opening and caressing his sweet hands around mine. ''Baby, I missed you!'' I give him a quick peck on the cheek.
''Cassia, no, come here, now!'' Luella demands. Sally looks at me questioningly and shakes her head. ''You do NOT visit your boyfriend before me, okay? I'm the most important person here, so you better understand that, okay? If not, I can easily kick you out. Your parents' money won't save you from being kicked out of the popular group!''
''True...'' I ponder.
''True!'' Sally agrees, like she always does. Turning my cheek to the right, I notice Zayne licking his lips and winking at Sally. She coos and places her finger nail in her mouth, bites seductively, and starts strutting toward him by crossing her legs. Quickly, I push my pants down and show the skin of my thighs and quickly run to Zayne.
Brushing his cheek softly, I then begin to jump up to bounce my goodies and shake them in his face. Sally quickly stops and smiles. ''Sally, isn't Zayne just the best?'' Sally nods her head and kinda blushes, the red tainting the color of her face.
''CASSIA!'' Luella yells out. ''Listen, do stuff like that in the Games, the Capitol will just eat it up. Especially at the interviews, flash yourself or something, just make them love you! Plus, with your beauty, you'll get sponsors like no other tribute will, but make sure to get practice with weapons and stuff.''
''I don't need that weapon stuff, my voluptuous body will get me far. And with my beauty... Oh, they'll eat me up. And fuck all the other tributes,'' I scoff. ''It'll just be about me, and I'll get everything. The Careers will love me and want me in their alliance, and I'll join but end up killing them in their sleep, because I come first.''
''Yeah, but beauty isn't everything! Sometimes it hurts.''
''If beauty hurts, then you know a bad bitch like me always in pain.'' I grin. ''Seriously, look at me! Compare me to all the famous Capitol models! I have a face like Marina, ass like Talia, titties like Aiyesha, and the sex appeal of Addison Chevel. Isn't that right, Zayne?''
''Uh-huh,'' Zayne nods vigorously. Another kiss goes to him for agreeing with yours truly. While I begin to kiss Zayne and bite on his bottom lip, I take in a look at his light brown eyes. Jesus, if he didn't have these looks, we would not be a thing. Honestly, that's all I care about. As long as he stays this way, he can see every part of me in action...
The door slams open and two Peacekeepers order my friends to get out. ''Remember what I said: get your head out of the gutters and use your body and beauty to get far, but also learn how to use some type of weapon – like a knife or something easy, nothing too difficult. And...''
I kinda zone out and don't pay any attention to Luella. ''Yeah, yeah, I get you. That's the smart thing to do, wouldn't you agree, Sally?'' Sally's lucky that she knows me, because if I wasn't friends with her, people wouldn't know who she was at all. Fuck her. She turns around and doesn't think I see her holding Zayne's hand, but I do. Taking off one of my boots, I throw it right at her and it hits the back of her head.
Zayne laughs at how humiliated she is and leaves, but blows me a kiss before exiting completely. Sally gets lifted up and pulled out of the room along with Luella, except Luella's screaming some type of nonsense that I don't care to pay any attention to.
Now I'm completely alone, in this room all by myself. No matter what, I'm still coming back to Five ASMAP, and I'll do it by any means. Whatever it takes, and I won't hesitate with these goodies.
But honestly... I'm debating what the likelihood of me escaping this room is. Probably ninety-twenty.
Avery Billings, 15, District Ten Male
No way, no way, no damn way! I was just Reaped! The Peacekeeper man is clutching my arm tightly, basically dragging me across the hallway. My body shakes intensely, and he looks at me in an awkward way, as if I'm making him feel uncomfortable. I'm just so hype, I absolutely love the Hunger Games!
''Can you stop shaking?'' The angry Peacekeeper asks. Staring up, I grin my teeth widely and shake some more. My body is vibrating like there's no off switch to me, and I eventually get the man to give up. We arrive to a Goodbye Room and he pushes me in, looks me in my eye before turning around, and closes the door.
Usually, as a general rule, I try to hide my emotions. I've always kept my face blank because I figured it was intel I'd rather not hand over; people reading me and learning what actually goes on through my mind doesn't sound appealing to me. But today... oh, no, today is different. Excitement pours out of me like sunshine through fine white linen. It's like my body is glowing from the inside out.
A smile that I haven't felt ever since that fateful night cracks on my face and I leap up from my chair, happy as a child with clowns and balloons at his birthday party. I begin pacing around the room with both of my hands around my back, and suddenly begin talking to myself.
''I love this so much, the Games are right in front of me!'' I shout. ''Just a week, one freaking week and I'll be in that Arena with... with the Careers! The bloodthirsty, psychotic trainees who win this thing almost every damn year. I'm gonna meet them, I'm gonna actually meet some soon-to-be killers!''
Immediately, the doors to my Goodbye Room shoot open and in the doorway stands my mom and brother. Hmm... I wasn't expecting them to come – more-so Emily, Amber and the other one that I absolutely hate – but that's fine, at least they care.
''Avery!'' My mother bawls, tears staining her eyes. She runs up to me and grabs both of my cheeks with the palm of her hands, squishes them together, and stares into my eyes. Quietly, she squeals and bites down on her lips, hard. Her hair is disorderly and blocks her face, but my eye catches something sharp.
In the center of her lip, blood drips from where she bit – where she bit hard. A feeling in my body kicks in and it's like I'm set on overdrive, bringing my hands up to touch my mother's face. She looks deep into my eyes and thinks I'm going in to welcome her into my arms, but that's not it at all. The inside of the cut on her lip... I want to see what's in there.
But you can't look. Not when it's your own mother, at least, my mind reminds me. Slowly, I look away and slide my hands away. ''Avery!'' She yells again, this time clutching both of my hands. ''You've just been Reaped, a-and you're showing no emotion! Don't you see how serious this is?!''
''It's not that big of a deal, Mom,'' I cackle. Looking up, I notice Jesse – my brother – smiling at me, the look in his eyes showing that he's bouncing all over on the inside. ''The Hunger Games aren't that bad, even if it's a family member going in. I don't see why you're overreacting.''
''THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS, AVERY!'' My mother, cognizant of the situation, yells at me. ''YOU COULD POSSIBLY DIE IN THERE, AVERY! I'VE WORKED MY ASS OFF TO MAKE SURE THAT YOU DIDN'T END UP IN SOMETHING LIKE THIS, BUT NOW YOU ARE, AND IT'S FRIGHTENING ME!''
''You shouldn't be frightened, Mom,'' I reassure. ''After all, I'm going into the Career Alliance this year. With those twisted, sadistic, horrific monsters. It'll... It'll be fu-''
''Avery, I can't,'' my Mother turns around, walks away from me and accidentally bumps shoulders with my brother. Just when she leaves, her tears drip to the floor and she bites her lips one last time, allowing a drop of blood to follow after the tears. Once she exits and closes the doors of the Goodbye Room, Jesse and I both stare at each other.
Abruptly, I jump from my seat and lie on the ground, taking in the look of the bright body fluid. Sliding my finger across the carpet, I take in the sample and bring it close to my eye. ''Jesse, I'm going in, with the Careers! Do you know how much fun I'm gonna have?''
Jesse sits on his knees right next to me, looking at the blood as well. ''I can't believe it, man... Hopefully I get to go into the Games some year, too. Imagine all the blood you'll get to see, all of the bodies you'll get to slip open, all the bruises, pain, and conflict you can cause!''
''Imagine all the sliced throats!'' I laugh.
''Imagine all the decapitated tributes!'' He screams.
''Imagine the look on the Careers' faces once you get a kill and join their alliance, then go on to kill some of them! Imagine the look on the District's face when you win! Imagine how good it'll feel to claim another victim!'' Jesse grabs my shoulders and shakes, vigorously placing his forehead onto mine, and then he breathes, ''Imagine killing yet again... Do you remember that girl you told me about, the one you killed?''
''That stupid skank, Helena? Yeah, I fucking murdered her. The dumb bitch had it coming, after all,'' I say as I continue to scrutinize the blood sample. ''I can't believe that it was just yesterday, too... You should've seen the look of horror on her face, she was so pleading for us to end it quickly, but we didn't! Say, when I make it back, I'll get another victim, for you this time!'' I commiserate.
''Avery, I would LOVE that!'' He pokes my chest. ''And Mom has no damn idea... Think of the future, think of all the stuff we could get away with! Maybe we can even kill those friends of yours and-''
''No, they're off limits,'' I stop Jesse. ''I've finally made it into the popular group, Jesse, and I can't eliminate my only friends right now. Maybe once I move forward and gain better friends, ones who are even more popular, then we can get rid of these ones. As of now, I'm gonna make this last.''
After my sentence, a Peacekeeper barges in and tells Jesse to get out. He eyes the Peacekeeper, looks back at me, gets up, sighs, and turns away. Once walking out of the room, I patiently wait for others to come visit me, but nobody enters. Well, that's weird...
So, instead of worrying myself, I find myself staring up at the ceiling. Restless thoughts begin to overflow my brain and I can't help but take out a lock of Helena's hair from my pocket. Killing her was just so... fun! I just wish that I had a book or two to read instead of just sitting here and playing with her hair.
But then, and this happens unexpectedly, Emily and Adam both walk in. ''Oh?'' I let out. The both of them just eye each other awkwardly and hold their breaths. Adam... I fucking hate Adam. I wish I could just grab him and strangle that skinny little neck of his, then I'd be happy.
But Emily... She makes my heart beat faster, she makes my whole world spin around and light up with joy. Why does Adam even get a girl like her when he doesn't deserve her? They both turn towards each other and begin whispering, leaving me out of the conversation. Quietly, I sneak up right behind Adam and peer up.
''What ya guys talkin' about?'' I wonder. ''You guys aren't talking about Helena, are you? It's done and over with, forget about it if that's what's running through your mind.''
''But how?'' Adam grits his teeth. ''You killed her, Avery! We just wanted to teach her a lesson, not end up taking her life... It's only been a day but I've held this in for twenty-four hours too long. That was wrong, all we needed to do was hit her and make her spend a night there – not for you to steal her life away from her!''
''Me..?'' I tilt my head to the right. ''Do you not remember that all of us stabbed her except for that pussy ass bitch Amber? You stabbed her, and so did Emily! Don't put the damn blame on me!'' I feel my hands forcefully shoot up and lock around Adam's wrists. Emily lets out an quick, short gasp and places her hands on mine, trying to remove them.
I stare up and a chuckle escapes my lips. Adam's honestly so lucky I don't have a weapon of my own on me right now. In front of Emily or not, I would kill him. I just want to, I can't stand him! ''Get off of me!'' Adam rips his hand free, now rubbing his wrist. ''And I don't know where the hell Amber is, why do you care anyway?''
''Because she could rat you guys out, and you're my only group of friends...''
''Why does it matter to you, you're going into the Games, idiot.'' My hand shoots up again and a loud ass smack resonates throughout the entire room. ''Dammit, Avery!'' Tears leak from his eyes.
''Don't call me an idiot, I'm more intelligent than you'll ever be in this worthless life of yours!'' I punch his shoulder. ''And because I want you two to kill her..! If she snitches on us, the both of you will be taken immediately and she'll show the Peacekeepers where we killed her. They'll easily scan your fingerprints and see that you both also stabbed her. Remember, I made you? Yeah, use that fucking brain of yours, idiot. She's the only person who didn't stab Helena!''
''Yeah, well what about y-you?'' Emily says, frightened. Placing my hand on her cheek, I slowly caress her. ''Y-You also s-stabbed her... s-so that makes you just as likely of a suspect as us, and what if we decide to rat you out?''
''Oh, sweet Emily, you don't get it, do you?'' I say. ''It doesn't matter what I've done in the past because I'm going into the Hunger Games now, where I'll be able to do this to many more children. And it doesn't matter if you mention my name and say that I also had a hand in killing Helena,'' I clarify. ''I'm going into the Arena, and if I come out alive, the Peacekeepers won't do a thing. How do you think the President would feel if his latest Victor was taken under custody? It wouldn't happen, so you guys would be screwing yourselves over – you'd be playing yourselves.''
They both just stand there in awe, quietly at my words. Adam grunts angrily and finally concludes his senses. ''W-We'll,'' he gulps. Leaning closer to him, I cross my arms together and motion for him to continue. ''We'll k-kill Amber and g-get rid of the evidence.''
''Adam, no, we can't-''
''We can, Emily!''
''Don't shout at her!'' I grip his shirt. Just as I'm about to say something else, the same Peacekeeper from before walks in, grabs the back of their shirts after observing us for a minute or so, and drags them out of the room. ''Well, how fortunate of you...'' I whisper to myself.
At last, I feel as though nobody else will visit me until Amber hesitantly looks inside of the doorway and locks eyes with me after I hear the creaking of the door. ''Come in,'' I motion. She creepily walks in, her appearance completely different. ''Aw, Amber,'' I embrace her. ''What happened to you? You used to be so pretty and now your hair is all untidy, the bags under your eyes have grown, and you look like you're high with those bloodshot eyes. You okay?''
''NO, I'M NOT OKAY!'' She freaks out, pushing me away from her. I manage to keep my anger under control, because I hate – and I mean hate – when people find out my true nature and how I feel. Only Jesse knows of those two things, and he'll forever remain the only person. ''YOU KILLED A GIRL, AVERY!''
''Hey, hey,'' I place my finger up to her mouth and shush her. ''Amber, you will keep your goddamn mouth shut, okay?'' I let her know what I want her to do. ''You won't say a damn thing, and you wait until everything clears up. In a week, trust me, this will all be over and done with.''
''But it's not over, Avery, you don't understand that!'' She claims. ''I watched the three of you murder an innocent girl who didn't deserve ANY of that! You guys took it too far, and I-''
''You won't do anything, Amber!'' It begins to overwhelm me. When I grip her shoulder, I make sure to press as hard as I can. Pulling her hair down, I leave her off with a warning. ''Just watch your back, Amber. Adam and Emily are gonna get you, so you might want to stay home all day everyday. But even so, they'll draw blood from you eventually, and soon, you'll be just like Helena – that's if you don't follow my instructions carefully, though...''
''You're sick, demented!'' Amber concludes. ''I hate you, and I hope you rot in Hell! I hope you burn, get crushed, die first in that Arena, get haunted by her, and whatever else! You're a bastard, Avery, and you deserve everything but the best.''
''If I die, just know that I'll remember your face, Amber. I'm gonna come back and haunt you no matter what, and when you look back on these days and realize that heeding my advice was the better option, you're gonna regret your actions.''
She stands there awkwardly, letting the silence fill the void of the empty room. ''In that Arena, I'll be thinking about you every night. You just don't understand, for many years I've been all alone and now I get to roam and invite new-comers to play with me. Do you know how awesome that is?''
''Y-You ps-psycho!''
''You had your chance, Amber. You should've just joined me and stayed my friend, but you didn't listen. Is this the situation you want to be in?'' I ask furiously. Getting up now, I pace toward her until she rapidly leaves the room and shuts the door behind her. Slamming on the door, I yell out, ''I just don't get it!''
It's sad, really... Nobody gets me, and I know that there are a group of people out there who are just like me. They enjoy this and do this because it's what they can do... It's what fulfills their needs. Nobody understands, and now it's too late. Well, in most of their eyes it is.
But for me, no. It's not, and it will never be. Because there are a certain group of people who will understand me.
The Careers.
Ocelot Harrien, 12, District Twelve Male
The city of wonder continues to circulate the presence of my mind. A childish smile is stapled on my face. The city that I've always been fascinated with and enjoyed thinking about is one train ride away. I never thought I'd be able to see the Capitol – until I was eighteen and had a degree, at least – but this is my chance.
Yes, I'm going into a death-match, but if I come out alive, I'll be able to use my money wisely and obtain a living standard in the Capitol. The perfect city filled with the most perfect people. My dream is to just do something there. I don't mind what it is, I may be a servant of some well-off woman and her offspring, but that's fine by me.
Patiently sitting down, I admire the beautiful decoration setup that they've left in these Goodbye Rooms. Of course, this could only be made by the Capitol. Someone in this poor, filthy District has no right of creating something this magnificent – but I someday hope I do.
I sit properly, placing one leg crossed over the other with my hands folded together neatly. Leaving my elbows off of the table, I continue to admire the beautiful room in front of me. It may not be a large room, but it's enough to appreciate.
Patiently waiting for my parents to come visit me, I think of how happy I'm going to be in these next few days. The Chariot Rides are something that I look quite forward to because the Stylists will completely renovate me and make me look like one of them.
When my parents are escorted into the room that I've been assigned to, I stand up. Like the old grumpy drunk that my father is, he walks in wobbly and uncontrolled. Accidentally, he leans to the side and bumps into the gold-leather curtains with the crystal pearls and drags them down.
''Father, no, that's Swarovski!'' I cautiously say, speed walking towards him. Calmly, I hold up my father's arm and assist him in getting up. Instead of thanking me, he pushes me to the side and wipes off his dusty, ragged clothes.
''Great,'' he comments. ''My life has already gone to shit because of this terrible District and my incredibly low-paying job, and now you've been Reaped for the Hunger Games. Can life get any worse, or do I just have to continue to drown my incredibly boring life in this alcohol?''
''Father, don't say things like that,'' I plead. My parents have never – not once – spoken about anything that has to do with wealth. All they've ever done is talk about how their life has been ruined due to the lack of money and the dead-end jobs that they both have. I've even heard them speak about how I'm the reason why they're in this situation, because I was never planned. They once even pondered over smothering me. ''Think about the positives, not everything that happens in your life is bad. Please understand that.''
Turning to my mother, I spot a small bottle hidden in her pocket. It's probably something with alcohol in it, I wouldn't be surprised if it was. ''How, Ocelot? How do we look for any sort of positives in this crummy District, especially when you're going to die?'' Ow. She brings her hand down to her pants and removes the small bottle of alcohol from her pocket.
''Mother, you must have hope,'' I assure. ''Just imagine if I win. Then you and father would not have to struggle any longer. Life would finally start to ease up and the two of you would be able to live in luxury along with me. We could live like the Capitolites do.''
''Yes, we could, but the odds of a twelve-year-old such as yourself winning is highly low. And you're from Twelve, so your odds are terrible. Don't speak of things like that when your death is inevitable, Ocelot.''
I stare up at my mother and keep quiet. She's about to drink some of the alcohol in her bottle until she locks eyes with me and sighs. ''I'm sorry, Ocelot,'' she apologizes. She grabs my head and brings me to her body, basically enveloping me in her. A Peacekeeper pushes the door open and watches as my father comes up to hug me as well.
''Get out,'' he says. But before they do leave, they both keep me tightly pressed against them. The hug was a perfunctory gesture mandated by social etiquette and colder than a day old meal. It was short where it should've been long, soft instead of how rigid it would've usually been, but it ended as abruptly as it had began.
It had all the soothing qualities that I could have ever asked for. ''I love you,'' I say.
''We love you, too,'' they respond, for the first time in a while. Then, they're gone without a backward glance, duty done, hug performed. When my parents leave, I don't expect anyone else to come visit me. Well, not until three boys who I've had conflict with - pretty much my bullies - for the past couple of years enter the room.
''Well, well, look who just got Reaped! Look at this loser, looking all happy and crap. You know you're gonna die, right?''
''It depends on how you look at the chances,'' I respond.
''No!'' Two of them say at the same time. ''It doesn't matter what your chances are, a loser like you could never win!'' The three boys all surround me, and one of them lifts up his fist and threatens to punch me. At first, I flinch, which gets them all to laugh, but then I back up and sit down, away from the three of them.
''You're going into that stupid city – the Capitol. Screw the Capitol, they're all so lame, but you're just a little fanboy who tries to be like everyone there!''
''Yeah, they're all so ugly!'' Another one taunts. ''They're just stupid people with nasty hair, nasty makeup, nasty faces, and nasty clothes!''
''Excuse me, but you're calling them nasty when you look like... that?'' I accuse.
''Shut up!'' The first boy to speak grabs me by the collar of my shirt. ''This is why you're going to die. All you can do is talk, but you have no bark to back it up! I hope you die a slow, painful death. You know how they say 'May the odds be ever in your favor'? Yeah, well, they'll never be in yours. You'll be the first to die, and I bet they give you a one and twenty-four chance of surviving!''
''That's what you don't understand,'' I sigh. ''What the predictions say don't mean anything about how you're going to do in the Arena. And when they say 'May the odds be ever in your favor,' that's just them hoping. They don't make your odds, you do! Your choices are what makes your odds. You have to make them in your favor. It doesn't matter about your skill or strength level, it all matters about your probability.''
They all look at me confused at first, but then they laugh. ''What a nerd! Do you really think that probability will help you out? You're still gonna die! What you do in the Games is gonna be stupid, and one of the Careers is gonna kill you! You're gonna be the weakest one, I bet that girl who was Reaped is gonna survive longer than you. You're not built like them, so you can kiss my ass with your probability nonsense.''
''I might not be built like the stronger tributes, and that's a fact. But you cannot say that I don't have a chance at winning like the other tributes do – to that I say, you're wrong.'' I explain. ''It's a statistical fact that everyone's odds are equal no matter what their race, age, gender, District, or physical build is. None of those factors affect your chances at winning. You don't see the Careers winning every year, do you?''
''Shut up, you think you're so smart, don't you?''
''Even the Careers, who've been trained for this their entire lives, grown up to be sociopathic killers with the expressed purpose of surviving the Games, who you expect to win every year back-to-back and have a higher probability of winning actually don't. The math shows it, and most of them waste their lives because of it. If I don't waste my precious time, the odds will most likely be in my favor. I have a week to pre-game, and I will pre-game hard. I can give my self the best statistical advantage by gaining weight and eating, because I don't know what type of Arena I'm entering, but I do know that there will be no real food. And on average, every tribute who survives the Bloodbath and goes on to live burns two thousand to two thousand four-hundred calories a day depending on their gender.''
''And?!''
''And it means that after burning those calories, if I survive, I will have much body mass to spare, and that will significantly increase my chances of survival. Which means that I will have eight and a half days before my body shuts down, and on average, most Games last about nine days. That gets me more than halfway there if I can survive independently, and that's a much larger factor. I will be able to-''
A fist collides with my jaw. ''Shut up!'' One of the kids kicks me in the stomach. ''You're just stupid! None of your bullshit statistics will help! You're gonna die of starvation and all of those Capitolites will laugh at you. You're just a wannabe, a loser, a lame! I hope you get mutilated, you stupid-!''
I roll out of the way as quick as possible and yell as loud as I can. The three kids all turn around and start scramming for the door. ''You even yell like a bitch Capitolite as well! You're just as stupid as them, and I hope you know that the Capitol is shit! All of their opinions are garbage and nothing more, so you can suck on this sack with your statisti-''
When they reach the door, two Peacekeepers barge in with rifles and grab a hold of the three boys. Two of them get smacked on the head with the tip of the rifles and I hear a large skull-splitting sound come from the attack. The other one yells, and a loud thud hits the walls just as I close my eyes to censor what will happen during the Games.
The three boys are gone, and when I open my eyes, I spot three thick stains of blood on the carpet. They spoke of the Capitol wrongly... They're terrible for that. The Capitol has always been right and always will be right. Nobody speaks of them so wrongly, especially not cockroaches from Twelve like those guys.
All who oppose – especially those three boys – are just little runts. They don't deserve a tongue to be able to speak. You just don't say that, and they don't deserve anything great. Nothing more, nothing less, they'll get what they deserve.
And they may speak of me wrongly like that, but I will always be superior to them. Maybe not in status or in strength, but when it comes to thinking and brainpower, I will always be the best when I'm compared to them. But they don't understand one thing...
I'm going to the Capitol for a week – a week good enough for me. And that's a week full of luxury and a great lifestyle.
Something that they'll never get to enjoy.
A/N: Ayeeeee! So, Jesus, it's been a while since I've updated. Ha ha, nah, it's been like a week and a half XD Anyway, yeah, so what's good? Everyone having fun? Yeah, I don't know what to say about this chapter. So I guess... Happy Mother's Day! :) Hope you all are treating your mothers well, or whoever you feel closest to you that is motherly because I know this is a subtle and emotional topic for some people, and are having an amazing time. Special day for amazing people, so hope you're all doing well.
So I hope you guys are enjoying this day! Idk about you all, but it's bright and sunny over here and just a beautiful day to go out, flaunt, and run through another neighborhood shirtless while saying, ''Ha ha, I'm gonna steal all your stuff!'' You know what, I'm gonna go do that right after I upload this chapter. So sit down, kiddos, I wanna tell y'all a story, because I have... nothing else to speak about. :) So a couple of weeks ago, I was chillin' with my Senior friend named Nicholas.
Now Nicholas is like, ugh, nevermind, fuck Nicholas. So yeah, he bought these pair of tan cargos, right? And they were cleannnnnnnn! So then we were in pottery class, and I'm like the most immature person ever XD So he was like, ''I have Captain Crunch in a bag, you want it, fam?'' And I was like, ''Nah, keep your cereal to your self, homie. You brought it, you eat it, don't go offering to children, they'll think you're weird.''
So Nick was like, ''Take it!'' So he threw it to me and I caught it, but then I threw it back and I have the worst aim in the world and it landed on some of the paint. Then me, being the immature hoe that I am, smiled ear to ear and had my teeth pressed against my bottom lip and I just reacted out of nowhere. He gave me that look... Like, you know the look your friends give you when they know you're about to do something stupid and ruin their day? Yeah, well, he gave me that look and I picked up the bag of cereal, and tossed it at him.
AGH, buddy jumped up and reached for the stars. He legit, like, moved to the left and tried to move away but his cargos got hit by the brown-blackish paint and it was stained all over the right side of his pants. The pockets looked like he shit himself and even the back was somewhat soaked. Then the crunch dropped on the ground and he accidentally stepped on it with his Vans and started yelling. So then Nick, being a snitch, was like, ''I'ma tell on you.'' I was like, ''What, bruh, don't do that!''
But nah, Nick was all like, ''Nah, you gonna get the strap now.'' I was like, ''Nick, fuck off, homie.'' So then I eventually got caught and my teacher was all like, ''Boy, if you don't sit ya ass down...'' Nah, she was like, in a proper voice, ''Ansley, how many times have I told you not to throw stuff in the classroom with paint?! This is the fifth time this year.'' And I was like, ''In my defense, he was offering me hella intense drugs and I couldn't accept. I don't agree with Flocka, Mrs.''
So Nick was right there and his mouth was gaped open and I was like, rubbing my nips or something while mini dancing. I don't know what I was doing, I was just jamming to my fire mixtape. By the way, y'all should download that. Got it on SoundCloud, PM me for my user. ;) But yeah, long story short, I ended up having to scrub painted equipment and ruined Nick's experience with cargo shorts. He now only wears long pants, and I plan on ruining those, too. Since he's a Senior, he leaves this week on Friday, but it's straight. Got his SnapChat so I'ma be sending him nonsense while he's in class with his professor and he'll be grunting and ish. Lol, I'ma ruin his last day so bad, omg.
But at the end, he threw away the bag of Captain Crunch and I got hungry so I was like, ''Yo, you still got the bag? I want it now.'' And then my friend Ariel who was on the left side was busting her ass off laughing while Nick just stared at me and was like, ''You're lucky you're a Sophomore, I would've beat your ass if you were a Senior.'' And then I was like, ''Nick, Nick, calm yourself. You wouldn't hit me, you love me!'' And Nick was like, ''You make me hate living but provide entertainment, I don't know what that is to me.'' And then I started dabbing, I don't know why, but I did.
So does anyone have Captain Crunch? Anyway, onto the questions, I suppose? I still don't know how I managed to update this on Mother's Day XD Forgot that I had this chapter just sitting in the Document and decided, ''Hey, don't I need to finish that one chapter?'' And then BAM! It has been complete for a while now, and I just forgot! :D
Opinion on each tribute?
Favorite tribute/POV?
Least favorite tribute/POV?
How's it going?
Any criticism at all? Like, how my proofreading skills are trash and I make simple mistakes? Ha ha, yeahhhhhhh... Lemme know, pls. ;)
So yeah, hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Lemme know what you think! But now I have to go take care of my offspring and feed him. Don't know where he is, but I remember last keeping him in a closet on accident. When your parenting skills are absolute ass, but ayeeeee. Ha ha, jk, I don't have a child. Pull-out game 100% because I believe in myself! :D Well, yeah, whatever, right? Anyway, that's all for this chapter! See you guys next time, which will hopefully be a quicker update. See ya! ^-^