Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the movie Zootopia are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.
I pondered what constitutes a series at the start of chapter two. An anonymous reviewer provided an answer, and opined I have a continuity going rather than a series. Continuity. I like the term and it may fit. The suggested definition gave me an answer, but left some questions unresolved. Nevertheless, while not so deep as a well nor so wide as a church-door, 'tis enough, 'twill serve for the nonce.
I had a great chapter title in mind, but lost my mind before recording it. If you're reading this, the old Glenn Yarbrough song was the best I could do without the original inspiration. (If you're not reading this then I found a better title or remembered the original idea.)
But, baby the rain must fall,
Baby, the wind must blow,
Wherever my heart leads me
Baby, I must go, baby I must go.
Baby the Rain Must Fall
Nick and Judy washed and dried the dishes as his mother put Joshua to bed. They puzzled out the proper location for most of dishes, silverware, and pans by the time Eleanor returned and brewed a pot of camomile tea.
As they sat at the table, with cups of steaming tea and lemon biscuits Mrs. Wilde requested, "... Now, Judy, I believe Nick went with you to Bunnyburrow? Tell me about your family."
The conversation lasted more than an hour. It had been a long day for Judy and Nick and when they eventually yawned she apologized and told them, "I have you on the top floor, north end. It should be quiet."
Nick smiled, "So much better than Bunnyburrow where I was miles away at a dump called the Shady Nook Bungalows. We'll find a couple bedrooms and–"
"Excuse me," his mother interrupted. "A couple bedrooms? Nancy told me the two of you are sleeping together."
Judy had been sipping tea, and managed to inhale some down the wrong pipe and began coughing violently. Nick stared in shock, then managed an uncharacteristic complete loss of words, "I... That's... Uh... How..."
"Of course, you've told me nothing. And I would expect a son to be upfront with his mother if he were in love. Perhaps Nancy is spreading gossip. Or, perhaps you aren't in love with Judy, but simply sleeping with her."
Eleanor looked at her son. Judy stared at Nick.
Nick panicked. A miracle intervention of some sort would be nice, but appeared unlikely. He could tell his mother he was sleeping with a rabbit, and suffer unknown consequences. He could lie and deny it, and Judy would never speak to him again. He could try and change the subject, which also offered a high probability Judy would never speak to him again. "I... I love Judy very much."
"I find that curiously reassuring, if you are, in fact, sleeping with one another. Was that report true?"
"Uh... Yes. Yes we are."
"You may have one bedroom, or two. If you prefer two Judy is welcome to the guest bedroom. If she wants a different room I could find linens for her."
Judy spoke, "One is fine, Missus Wilde."
"If you are sleeping with my son you will please call me Eleanor if you can't manage Ellie. Now, I've finally dragged the fact he loves you out of Nicholas. Your feelings towards my son?"
Judy put a paw down on Nick's. "I love him very much."
"If wish to be with my son you may use the room I prepared for Nicholas. North end. The guest bedroom is much nicer, but doesn't offer sufficient privacy. Nicholas, what have I told you about honesty?"
"It's a bad idea? Avoid it at all costs? A lie in the mouth is worth two in the bush? It should be used sparingly, if at all?"
Eleanor sighed, "You will give Judy a very pretty picture of my parenting skills. You are probably too old to drop down a well, and it is currently too dark to find one. I'm certain you can find the room I prepared.
As Nick carried their bags down the dim hallway he explained to Judy, "We're in exile. Top floor, north end is like being sent to the east pole."
"But she said there was privacy. Is Josh or your Uncle Charlie going to walk in us here?"
Judy yawned and stretched as she opened her eyes. It felt good to wake up snuggled next to Nick.
"Morning, Fluff, hope you slept better than I did."
"What's wrong?"
"Worried about Mom. Wondering what Nancy told her and what she thinks about us."
"Your mom likes me."
"Maybe."
"Maybe?"
"Okay, probably."
"Just probably? She was very nice to me yesterday. And she gave us a room to share."
"This room was for me. You could have had the guest room if you wanted it. Although I'm happy to have the best bedroom in the house."
Judy looked around the sparsely furnished room by dawn's light. "This is the best bedroom in the house?"
"Any bedroom with you is the best bedroom in the house," he assured her and nuzzled her ear.
"Ohhh, Stop it, Nick! Stop it! You know that makes me crazy."
"Crazier," he whispered. "I love my crazy bunny."
"Not when Josh might come looking for us," she moaned, "Or your mother knock on the... What did you mean about maybe, or probably she likes me? She was very nice."
Nick stopped his attention to her ear, the thought of Joshua or his mother interrupting driving any optimism from his mind. "My mom is always nice. Her manners are impeccable. If she hated your guts she would invite you to a five course dinner, and etiquette would demand she wait and poison you in the dessert course rather than with the salad course. If she invited you to a five course meal you would be entitled to all five courses before she bumped you off."
"You're saying she doesn't like me?"
"I think she probably does like you. I'm just warning you, don't take anything for granted with mom. The old girl should have been a professional poker player, she doesn't give any clues about what cards she's holding. Who knows what she's thinking?"
"She loves Josh."
"Okay, granted. She loves Josh. Doesn't mean she likes you. I'm not even sure what she's thinking about me at the moment. Fortunately the well has been capped."
"Your mother likes me. She's your mother, she loves you. You love me and you're sleeping with me. She's relived to learn you're not gay. Not that there would be anything wrong with that."
"Probably. I'm just saying, if she serves dessert, don't eat it."
"But my brave, noble fox hero will unselfishly eat if for me?"
"Of course, I'll risk it for your sake."
"Out of bed, Hero," Judy sighed, "we need to get dressed and face the day."
The dawn had appeared gray from the small bedroom window. The larger window in the kitchen did not improve their opinion of the weather.
Eleanor stood at the stove, making breakfast for Joshua.
"Hey, Squirt," Nick greeted his nephew.
"Hi! Can we play football again today?"
"Let's see if it rains," answered Judy.
"Good morning," Mrs. Wilde told the pair. "Sleep well?"
"I did, thank you," Judy replied.
"I didn't. I kept having nightmares of someone dropping me down a well."
"A guilty conscious, I expect. What are your plans for the day?"
"We've heard one vote for football. If the rain holds off for a couple hours I'd like to show Judy and Josh the old Meadows bank building and anything else of interest on main street."
"That shouldn't take you long. I'll walk with you as far as the market. I want to pick up a couple things before lunch."
"Need help carrying anything?"
"I manage very well, thank you. I should be able to carry everything home without your help."
"My help? I was offering Judy or Joshua. They're both small but they're strong."
Mrs. Wilde turned to Judy, "Are you quite certain you love him?"
"Can I get back to you on that? The way he treats his mother has me a little worried."
Nick looked at Josh and sighed, "You know, no matter how much you love a female, she will join with another in ganging up on you."
After breakfast, Nick asked his mother "Have they got the grocery store open again?"
"No the little market is the only place to find things more nutritional than beer and candy bars in town. I don't know that they're even working to... I wish your Uncle... It is not my business. For real grocery shopping we drive elsewhere."
"Since the rain hasn't started, and you turned down my generous offer for Judy or Josh to help carry, we should leave the dishes for now and escort you to the market. Hopefully you can beat the rain home. Then we three will plunge ahead and I'll show them the ruins of Fox Ridge."
"Ruins?" asked Joshua.
"Not yet," explained Nick, "it's a work in progress. They'll be ruins soon enough."
Eleanor muttered, "Too soon."
They left Eleanor at the tiny market, and passed a boarded grocery store.
"Why is it closed?" asked Judy.
Nick shrugged, "I don't remember what Mom told me. Been closed awhile. Broken this or cracked that. They ought to fix the pipe, or furnace, or wall and... Did you see the old fox in the market?"
"No."
"Well, old Mister Greene owns the place and it didn't seem worth the effort to fix it up the grocery at his age. He's doing okay just selling basic staples."
A bar, one of the few remaining businesses on the street, was closed until noon. Some places, like a former drug store, appeared in good condition. "Some lasted longer than others," Nick explained – pointing to what had been a furniture store, but sheets of plywood covered what were probably large, broken windows.
At the heart of the short main street area, Nick pointed to a word carved in stone at the top of the bank. "Can you read that?"
"I don't read good," Joshua admitted.
Judy asked, "But you know your letters. Can you spell it?"
"Sure. M - E - A - D - O - W - S."
"That spells Meadows. Your several times great grandfather Meadows built the bank, and–"
"He must have been real strong to lift those rocks."
"Very strong," Nick assured him. "With either hand he could–"
"He hired other animals to make the building," interrupted Judy. "When you pay someone to build something for you, you say that you built it."
Nick looked at Judy, "Are you sure he didn't lay the stones himself?"
"Do you want your nephew think he can't believe a word you say?"
"Interesting point," the fox mused. "Is he better off believing his uncle or not? I think I am much more entertaining than the truth."
"This must have been a great movie theater, in the day," Judy commented as they passed another boarded front.
"I think so. I've never saw the inside. But it was built when going to the movies was a weekly ritual for everyone."
"Were there any big stores?" Josh asked.
"Nope, the big department stores and supermarkets were all after Fox Ridge started into decline. It never made sense for anyone to build big stores." Nick pointed somewhat to the north, "You want big? I think the old ice house is about a kilometer away."
"An ice house?"
"Not a house made out of ice," Judy explained before Nick could give that answer. "Before there were refrigerators you could plug in, animals used to have big coolers to keep food cold. They were called ice boxes because there was a block of ice inside."
Nick picked up the narration, "And a long time ago animals would harvest ice in the winter. They had special saws and they cut out big blocks and hauled them into ice houses, big round buildings where the ice could last all summer until next winter. Later, when they had machines that could make big blocks of ice they didn't need to harvest ice. But in Fox Ridge they still stored the ice in the old ice house. The walls were... I don't know how thick the walls were. Really thick."
"And it's still there?" Judy asked in a skeptical tone. "I think the ice house in Bunnyburrow has been gone a hundred years."
"But I'm not talking about the flimsy Bunnyburrow ice house. This one was one of the seven wonders of the world... Okay, top twenty-seven wonders of the world–"
"Top seven hundred?" Judy suggested in a helpful tone.
"You haven't seen it, or you wouldn't be so skeptical. Like I said, even when manufactured ice came in it was still used to store it, and the city used it for storage after that. The thing is huge."
"Can we see it Unca Nick?"
"Maybe, before we leave. I want to head back before the rain starts. It's just a big round building."
"I wanna see a big round building."
"Okay, before we leave. I promise. But I want to get down to the end of the old business district." A couple minutes later they stood in front of a small, closed video arcade. Peering in the window it looked like a couple of the old machines still sat in the building. "Fox Ridge, where a video arcade went in years after PCs were killing video arcades everywhere."
"This was what you wanted us to see?"
"Two incarnations before the video arcade it was an appliance repair shop. From the days when you put a new switch or cord on something solid instead of buying a new, cheap and flimsy panda import. But, in between appliance repair and video arcade, this used to be the Wilde tailor shop." He looked at Joshua, "Your great-grandfather moved to Fox Ridge and opened a tailor shop. And his son, Wild Bill–"
"My grandpa?"
"That's right, your grandpa. He fell in love with a beautiful princess who lived in a castle guarded by a terrible dragon. But the princess loved the humble tailor and she climbed down her tower window one night and ran away with the tailor. And the two of them moved to Zootopia."
"And were happily ever after?" the little fox asked hopefully.
"Well, no," sighed Nick. "He had a dream of opening his own place in Zootopia. And no matter how hard he worked he just never got enough money together to make it happen. And he died. The end."
"No it's not the end," corrected Judy. "The tailor and the princess were very happy together. And they had two beautiful... They had a beautiful daughter named Nancy. And she had a son named Joshua who was more precious than anything in the world to Nancy and the princess. Oh, and the princess had a son too, his name was Nick."
"Great," muttered Nick, "your mom isn't even here and she's ganging up against me with Judy."
Joshua wanted to know, "Was there really a dragon?"
"Yes, and–"
"No," Judy told Joshua. "There are no real dragons. Your uncle means that your great-grandfather Meadows–"
"Great-grandmother too, from what I hear," added Nick. "A pair of dragons."
"He just means they didn't want your grandmother to marry your grandfather."
"Why?"
"Uh, they loved their Ellie very much and didn't think anyone was good enough for her."
It seemed to satisfy the little fox, to the relief of the adults. Nick whispered, "Good save," in Judy's ear.
"Pick your fairy tales more carefully," she warned in a whisper.
The trio stood at the far end of the former business district. A closed car dealership could be seen a couple blocks away, and one or two other boarded over buildings which didn't appear to be homes, but whose original identity wasn't clear. Nick walked into the middle of the street and stared, silently, back in the direction of the Wilde home.
Curious, Judy said nothing for a few minutes, uncertain what was going on in his mind. "Nick? What are you thinking?"
He sighed and returned to the sidewalk, "Looking down the street and seeing it filled with animals, seeing it alive – really alive. I think it was dying before I was born, but... Damn it. I'm half Meadows. I'm not always proud of that fact, but my ancestors built this place. It may not have been very big, but it was one hell of a town a century ago and it hurts to see it like this."
"It hurts to see anyplace that's dying."
"Yeah, but it hurts even more when... Funny... Wonder if my hustling skills are from the Meadows side? They knew how to make a credit, always kept it honest – or so they claimed – but they knew how to make money. Wildes were crazy dreamers. There had to be something someone could have done to save this place."
"Places don't last forever. New towns are built. Old towns disappear. Do you think even Zootopia will last forever?"
"I'm not saying it should last forever. This place still has potential. It could last for–" A large rain drop hit his muzzle. "I say we continue the discussion after a brisk run."
Judy, "Seconded."
Nick grabbed his nephew and hoisted him up onto his shoulders, "Run, Carrots! Have towels ready for us when we get there."
"I'm not going to leave you."
"You'll–"
"Save your breath for running," Judy advised.
Carrying Joshua slowed Nick down, and the trio were soaked by the time they reached the Meadows home. Eleanor sat on the porch, watching the rain and waiting for them with a pile of towels."
"Ahhh, I love the smell of wet fur in the morning," Nick gasped as he swung his nephew down.
"Come here, Josh," his grandmother ordered and she wrapped a towel around him and pulled him onto her lap. "Judy, the kettle is on the stove. After you dry off will you pour some water in the tea pot on the table? I thought orange spice would be a good flavor for watching the rain."
"I think it sounds lovely, Missus... Eleanor."
As they sat on the porch they observed a group of four armadillos on the sidewalk, laden with plastic bags from the market, heading in their direction.
"I think that's Maria and her brothers," Judy observed.
"And my shrewd detective abilities deduce that is most likely their mother."
"You're a genius, Foxmale," Judy said, rolling her eyes. "Eleanor, can I–"
"Certainly. They're welcome up here on the porch."
Even before she had finished talking Judy was down the steps and running to the armadillos.
"Up on the porch," Judy ordered, taking the bags from the two small boys and nodding towards the house.
"But–" protested the mother.
"I wouldn't argue with her," Nick advised, taking a bag from the mother and daughter. "Well, I try. It never does me any good."
Maria, having talked with the foxes the day before, was willing to go along, and the bewildered mother went along only to see her children were safe.
"Nick, get more towels," Eleanor ordered. "Do you know where they are?"
"Think so. If I'm not back in half an hour come looking for me."
"If you're not back in half an hour I'll have a paddle when I come looking for you."
"I should not be here," the mother armadillo protested.
"Nonsense. You'd rather be out in the rain?"
She looked out at the driving rain. "It is very beautiful."
"It is very beautiful from here on the porch. You could drown trying to walk in a deluge of that–"
"And I'm back," called Nick, hurrying out the front door and tossing towels at the armadillos and Judy. "Miss me?"
"I met the children yesterday at the park," Eleanor explained. "You are...?"
"Their mother, Isabella."
"Lovely name. My name is Eleanor. This is my son Nicholas–"
"Nick."
"Who is visiting for a couple days with his dear friend, Judy Hopps."
"She is famous," Maria told her mother. "I looked it up. They are police officers in Zootopia. She hurt her cheek in a fight with a bear!"
"A bear?" Isabella repeated in disbelief.
"Don't let her looks fool you," Nick assured her. "She is one tough little bunny."
"I'm not little!" protested Judy. "I'm normal size – for a rabbit."
"An' she's really good at football," threw in Joshua, to which the armadillo children nodded in agreement.
"Please, sit," Eleanor told her, gesturing to a chair beside her. "The rain doesn't look like it will stop very soon."
Somewhat reluctantly the armadillo sat down beside her. "Judy," Eleanor requested, "at least one more cup, for Isabella. You might ask if any of the children would like orange spice tea."
Judy returned a moment later with cups for Isabella and Maria. The armadillo barely had time to thank her host before Charles came out to investigate why the front door was being opened and closed so often. He glared with anger, "Off of my porch," he ordered.
Isabella started to rise, and Elanor put a paw down on her arm to stop her. "You forget, Charles, the porch is part of the house and is therefore half mine. You cannot order my guests off of my half of the porch. You are, of course, welcome to join us. There are available chairs on your half."
Charles spun around and returned to the house, slamming the door loudly.
"Your husband does not like armadillos."
"He is not my husband, he is my brother. And I fear we share very little, other than our parents and this house. Poor Charles does not like anything these days – he seems to despise Judy also, and I find her very sweet. We should appreciate all that we can."
Isabella looked out at the storm, "Like the rain."
"You seem to enjoy the rain very much."
"Do you know what forced so many of my people to move here?"
"No... No, I don't."
"Drought. If we could have stayed... Every time it rains I think how beautiful it is."
"You give me new eyes. Thank you."
"The rain doesn't look like it will end soon." Judy offered, "There's a card game my younger brothers and sisters like. I could teach it to the children."
"That 'Oh Heck' thing?" asked Nick.
"I wanna play!" Joshua insisted. The armadillo children nodded agreement.
"Mom? I'm going to need cards and a pencil and paper for score keeping."
"The parlor, one of those drawers by the window. Oh, and go yourself. I'm not certain if it's safe for Judy to beard the lion in his lair this particular moment."
"That was my plan," he assured her.
Nick paid little attention to the card game, trying to listen to the conversation of the mothers. The topic of conversation was lack of opportunity in Fox Ridge for the armadillos.
"Nick!"
"What? I–"
"Your bid. How many?"
"I... Is there a chance you'd let me go over and join the adult conversation?"
"I'll miss you dreadfully... One condition. Give me a kiss."
The armadillo children stared in wonder. One of them even made a noise that drew the attention of the mothers. Isabella tried to say nothing, and failed. "Your son..."
"He and Judy are in love."
"But... He is a fox and she is a rabbit. This doesn't bother you?"
"I believe parents can't tell their children who they should love, and it is a waste of time to try."
"But... He is a fox and she is a rabbit!"
"You said that. This is a matter for them, not me. Love is what matters."
Isabella shrugged. "Armadillos would not allow it. My parents arranged my marriage."
"They chose your husband? That is terrible!"
"Why? All parents love their children. They want a good partner for their child and chose a suitable partner."
"But there is no place for love!"
"You learn to love your husband." She pointed at the children. "My husband and I love each other. Tell me, do those who marry for love always stay together?"
"No," Eleanor admitted. "Divorce happens."
"For us too," Isabella sighed.
"I think if any species had figured the secret of success in marriage they would have told us all."
Nick listened to the mother's conversation as it returned to the community. Businesses Fox Ridge once had. Skills different individuals among the armadillo residents had, but the lack of opportunity for them. The kinds of shops armadillos wanted to see. The two agreed on the need for the grocery store to be repaired. The conversation turned to fabric and sewing, an area in which they both took an interest and Nick returned to the card game with Judy and the children.
"We should go home," Isabella told her children after the lengthy conversation.
"It's still raining," Mrs. Wilde pointed out.
"But much less. And we need to get home."
"Can we finish this game, please Mama?"
"Will it take long?"
"Two more hands," Judy assured her. "Five minutes."
"It has been wonderful chatting with you," Eleanor told Isabella as they waited for the game to end.
"For me as well. You are the first fox who has been kind to me."
Charles joined them at dinner. Perhaps he wanted to impress upon the visitors that he was their host. Perhaps he did it so he would not be talked about behind his back. He ignored Judy during the meal. She took no offense, not really wanting to talk with him anyway.
"Nick, Judy," Eleanor told them toward the end of the meal, "you must let Charles take you into his office and show you his new desk." Neither Nick, nor Judy, nor Charles knew how to respond to the suggestion. Had a poll been taken it would have revealed all three thought the suggestion daft. Nick and Judy wondered how Eleanor had missed her brother's behavior at dinner. "Woodworking is his hobby and his skills are impressive. You need to see what he has made."
"Okay, she's flattering Charlie. I'll play along and 'Oooh' and 'Ahh' for her sake," thought Nick.
"She's apologizing for arguing with me," decided Charles. "She realizes she was wrong to call armadillos guests." Even if that wasn't her motive, Charles took a great deal of pride in his work and didn't mind having others look at the new desk.
"Can I see it too?"
"Charles might let you see it," Eleanor told her grandson. "I'm not sure you're old enough to appreciate the skill required to build it."
Judy would have preferred staying in the kitchen and helping wash the dishes. But it seemed more polite to look at what Charles had build, even if she lacked any real sense of why Eleanor made the request. She accompanied Nick to the Uncle's office.
Nick found no need to pretend being impressed. "That's incredible," were his first words.
Judy looked closely at the desk. "That wood... It's so unusual. What is it?"
The first words Charles spoke to Judy were "Birdseye maple. It was a very popular wood a century ago and I thought it fit the age and style of the room."
He smiled as the rabbit murmured, "It's beautiful."
Joshua was quickly bored by furniture and wandered back to the kitchen. Charles, pleased to have an audience, pulled open a drawer. "Look at that," he ordered, pointing to a joint.
Nick hesitated, "Dovetail?"
"Correct. You can't get furniture like this anymore."
"Oh, you can," Nick corrected him. "But it costs a fortune. Most people just buy that cheap fiberboard stuff. I picked up an old oak library table to hold my stereo equipment. It's a solid piece of furniture, but Wow! This is incredible."
Pleased with the praise, Charles pulled the drawer completely out. He gestured where the drawer had rested, "Oak slides." For the drawer itself he explained, "Birch sides. The bottom is a veneer, but it is a birch veneer. Here on the side of the desk, mortise and tenon joints."
"I don't even know what that means," admitted Nick.
"It means quality."
"Excuse me," Judy asked, looking around the office. "How much of this did you build yourself? I think Eleanor said you built the table in the kitchen."
"I built that, and most of the woodwork in here is mine. I don't really design much. I look at pictures, and I can change things a little. I don't take credit on the designs, but the work is mine."
"It must have taken a long time to build this," Nick mused, still looking at the desk.
"Not as much as you might think. The right tools and some practice and anyone could build it."
"I doubt that."
"Maybe a little skill. But tools and practice. Tools... I buy them at estate auctions. Purchased a whole carpentry shop once when it went out of business."
Eleanor brought Joshua into the parlor and found an old game of Pickup Sticks™ in the drawer where Nick had located a deck of cards earlier. "Here is a game you probably don't know," she told her grandson. She hoped her plan worked. Charles, like all artisans, enjoyed showing off his creations and fed off of praise. There was a chance that Nick understood what she had done, but whether he did or not she trusted that her brother's woodworking skills could hold the couple's attention. It was half an hour before the three left the office and Eleanor heard them moving about to other rooms where there were more things for Charles to show off.
Charles sat with the others in the parlor for a time showing off his creations. Nick tried to draw him out about some of the buildings they had seen that day. Judy noticed that while Nick always began with questions about the history of the building, to bring out memories from his uncle. But Nick managed to bring the conversation around the current condition of a building, to the best of his uncle's knowledge.
When Eleanor left to put Joshua to bed Charles excused himself. Both Nick and Judy had a strong sense he felt uncomfortable with the two sitting together, Nick's arm around the rabbit. But he said nothing harsh and gave them each a polite, "Good evening," before leaving.
"So..." Judy offered, "Wanna make out until your mom comes back?"
"As delicious as that sounds," Nick agreed, and gave her a fast kiss. "I need a little privacy."
"The little fox's room?"
"No. Something... I have this crazy idea... Oh, a little privacy and your phone."
"My phone? Something wrong with yours?"
"Don't have your parents in my contacts. I need to call them."
"Why?"
"I need a phone number in... If you don't want to let me use your phone just give me their number, okay?"
Judy handed over her phone, and Nick left for an unoccupied room.
"Nick?" Bonnie asked in surprise. "Is Judy all right?"
"She's fine. I'm hoping there's a Bunnyburrow phone directory of some kind. I need a number."
"In Bunnyburrow?"
"Yes. In Bunnyburrow."
Nick placed the next call on his own phone. "Hello?" a feminine voice answered.
"Hello. I'm hoping to speak to Julius Flywheel."
"May I ask who's calling?"
"My name is Nick Wilde and–"
"Nick Wilde who was here for the terrible thing out at Burke and Hare?"
"Yes. Did I meet you?"
"No, but my husband told me about you. I'll get him."
A minute later a suspicious voice asked, "Yes?"
"Julius? Nick. Hey, wanted to ask how you were doing."
"No you didn't. You don't call a lawyer, at home, on Friday evening to ask about his health... Disgruntled ex-client might call at three a. m. and say 'Have a nice day' just to piss me off. You want something."
"Just curious if you plan to be in Zootopia. Trial starts next week."
"I'm well aware of that and will be in Zootopia. Get to the point. Your meter is running and I charge three hundred an hour for consultation."
"And people think I was a crook. Hey, friends help each other out. I was at a meeting with the detectives who'll be the main witnesses. I mean, there are things I can't tell you – but there are things I can talk about."
"Okay, that's what you're offering me. What are you asking for?"
"You are the most suspicious rabbit I've ever met. You have no faith in your fellow animal at all! But, as long as you brought it up, I have a teensy little question or two about getting a boilerplate lease."
"There are a hundred of them on-line. And you're smart enough to know that. What do you really want?"
"Well, I'm thinking of something a little different from the run-of-the-mill leases. And then I remembered this lawyer who produced the most complicated will in the history of the world and–"
"History of the world is a long time. Most complicated ever in Bunnyburrow. But flattery will get you nowhere. What does this boilerplate need that makes it different?"
Nick explained.
Julius listened. "Interesting," the lawyer admitted. "A waste of time. No one in his or her right mind would sign a lease like that. I'd advise a client to avoid–"
"Client who was the property owner or the tenet?"
"Either. It's crazy."
"And you struck me as a rabbit with an imagination. You can't imagine anyone needing a lease like that?"
"No way would anyone in Zootopia... You're not in Zootopia. And you're sure not in Bunnyburrow. Where are you that you want a boilerplate like that?"
"Place is called Fox Ridge."
"Never heard of it."
"I'm not surprised. And I want any extra bells and whistles you can add to make it harder to break."
"For whom, owner or tenet?"
"Both."
"Nick, my boy, this curiosity piques my interest. That and the promise of inside info on my case. Ten years? It will take that long?"
"Longer, but ten years is a start. I'm hoping things start to improve in a year or two. Ten years is a pledge that everyone is seriously in the game."
"This sounds like one hell of a gamble. Got any of your own money on the table?"
"No. And it is a big gamble. I can't guarantee either side will go for it, but drowning warthogs clutch at straws. None of my own money on the table, but I've got family pride in the game."
"When do you need this?"
"Twelve years ago. Tomorrow, if it's possible."
"I can customize an existing boilerplate in an hour or so. Your itemized bill will be anything you can tell me before the trial. And next week you owe me a really nice dinner in Zootopia where you will tell me more about this gamble. And if you're lying about having any information for the trial it will be another dinner, at the most expensive restaurant I can find in Zootopia."
"Julius, how could you doubt me? I mean, really? A lawyer and a hustler? Could there be two more honest males in the world? And we'll drink a toast to crime."
"Hey, without it we'd both be out of work."