Chapter 6: Yamcha, when we he was actually threatening!

(A/N: Remember when Yamcha was badass and awesome. Yeah, I don't. He is, but when I got fully introduced to this series long ago, Yamcha was already getting his ass beat. This title is ironic.)

So here we were on a boat going up a river, and Oolong asked where we going next.

"Oolong, we're not our way to Fry-Pan Mountain or Fire Mountain where the next Dragon Ball is." I said leaning back on the edge of the boat.

"You mean that mountain where the fearsome Ox-King lives? Ace, Bulma, and Goku , you three are nuts!" Oolong said shapeshifting into a fish. "Screw this, I'm outta here!"

He swam away, but I stopped Goku from going after him. I nodded at Bulma, and of course she used a fishing rod with her underwear to get him back. Bulma even gave him the PP Candy which I planned to cure. Most of the rapport between the people was canon stuff so I stayed quiet until the boat shook send all of us into the water. With the boat out of gas, I had the honor of dragging the boat to shore.

"Damn it! My capsules are gone! My shampoo!" She said before turning to Oolong. "You stole them!"

Oolong was still trying to flee and Bulma made the "Squee!" noise sending the poor kid into the bushes to make a painful dump. Bulma began laughing, but I was a tad sorry for Oolong. I still had my BlackTab and my duffel bag so I spawn out of BlackTab a cure to give to Oolong.

"Here Oolong, this should cure the effects of the pill." I said giving him a vial to which he quickly drank.

"Ace, you're a lifesaver!" He said grateful.

Bulma wasn't pleased.

"How am I going to keep him in line, Ace?" She yelled at me.

My response was to hold her by the collar (Even though, I had to call her down to my height.), and cut her a heated glare.

"Might I remind you that you are the oldest in the group and yet you set a shitty example for everyone else. Oolong's a perv, but he didn't deserve to be done dirty like that." I said harshly before releasing. "No need to be a total bitch to him."

Bulma huffed before realizing she did need to change out of her wet clothes and she didn't have any caspules with clean clothes. She looked over at Ace who was still upset at her for drugging Oolong.

"Hey Ace, you got any clothes for me left?" Bulma asked sweetly. "C'mon, I'll wear whatever you got."

Bulma shouldn't have said that, because the deviant side of Ace was concocting a scheme. However, Ace actually had to think of how far he wanted to go, but he remembered they were in Diablo Desert. So out of his BlackTab, he spawned a blue and purple halter top with a pink shroud and a long white skirt with the top part blue. Even came with gladiator sandals. That's right, Ace had raided Nami's closest this time. Bulma wasn't so happy about the clothes given to her.

"Before you say anything, we are in a desert. Would you rather me give you a sweater to boil in so Oolong won't perv on you? He still would. Besides, that's the last outfit I have in stock." Ace said to Bulma. "So please suck it up."

Bulma sighed to walked off to change into the belly dancer outfit. Ace was able to spawn outfits for everyone before his BlackTab hit low battery. Oolong and Goku virtually had their exact clothes. Ace on the other hand was a tad different. He wore black gi like one of his younger brother's. The outfit Ace now wore was similar to the Turtle school uniform. However, it was black with blue linings. The kanji in the front was "耐久" (Taikyū) meaning endurance and on the back was "黒" (Kuro) meaning black. He had no idea that the design he selected was one of his younger brother's creations, but didn't dwell on it. When Bulma returned to the group, the Dragon Ball Gang started walking through the hot and humid desert. Ace didn't complain about this. He lived on an island near the equator back on Earth Prime.

"It's so hot!" Oolong said bitterly. "You just had to lose your capsules, Bulma."

"Eat bacon, you pig!" Bulma screeched at him.

"Well you two jackasses, shut up!" Ace yelled annoyed at their bickering.

He casually pulled out a can of soda out of his duffel bag to everyone's shock and started drinking it. Bulma asked where did he get that and if he had more of those. Ace nodded and give everyone a soda admitted he got them out of Oolong's mansion.

"I had snagged some stuff from your mansion, Oolong. I'm sorry about that, but I had a feeling I'd need it more." Ace remarked.

Bulma still went into her temper tantrum like a brat over not having her capsules to wash her hair, watch TV, and so forth. Only after she started to bitch about walking in the desert, did Ace chop her neck knocking her unconscious.

"Kami, I couldn't wait for heat exhaustion to get her to shut up." He said dragging her into the shade.

Unbeknownst to everyone (except Ace), they were being watched by blue floating cat through a telephone. Of course, Ace knew it was Pu'ar and Yamcha coming for them.

"Look alive, guys. We got company!" I said unsheathing my sword.

"Right!" Goku said getting his Power Pole ready.

"Oh great!" Oolong said getting behind us.

Right on cue, Yamcha and Pu'ar show up. Now one thing has always bugged me, is Pu'ar a guy or a girl? Well I guess I could find out now.

"Well well, it's Yamcha the Desert Bandit." I remarked. "What an honor for you to come."

"My reputation precedes me. I am the Desert Bandit. I normally don't prey on children. But you must know that if you want to leave here alive, you'll hand over your money and your capsules to me and Pu'ar now." Yamcha said sounding rather threatening.

"Pu'ar! Cry-baby Pu'ar?" Oolong said sweating harder.

"And if it isn't the perverted pig, Oolong. How awful it is to see you again." Pu'ar said. "You look as greasy as always."

"Says the androgynous pussy!" Oolong barked.

"Wait, hold on! Are you guy or a girl?!" Ace screamed confused.

"I'm a man, damn it!" Pu'ar screamed. "Bully! Weirdo!"

((A/N: Pu'ar was a guy in the manga, but they made him female in the Funi dub which I don't fully understand why. I don't know if they changed it back in Kai, so I'm going with the manga here on this gender deal.))

"Enough of this. Now hand over your valuables, especially that sword of yours." Yamcha said gesturing to Rakurai.

I did the boldest thing in defiance, I spat on his face.

"It'll be a cold day in hell before I let you get your hands on my sword! You'll have to kill me for it." I said tossing off my duffel bag. "Goku, together!"

"Hai!" Goku said as we both charged at Yamcha.

"You in deep shit now, Cha-cha!" Oolong screamed gaining into the shade next to Bulma.

-Yamcha vs Goku w/Ace-

Rakurai and Yamcha's sword clashed and clang as they fought with the extra clashes of Goku's Power Pole.

"Impossible, the Nyoi-bō! How do you have something like that?" Yamcha said leaping back.

"Passed down to be by my grandfather." Goku said nailing Yamcha with a punch to the face.

"If he means Gohan, then I can't hold anything back!" Yamcha said thought getting up to ready himself.

Yamcha got into position and Ace could feel the rise in Yamcha. Ace had secretly learned how to sense ki. Ace leapt back watching Yamcha charge after Goku.

"Rōgafūfūken (Wolf Fang Fist)!" Yamcha yelled as he started a combo of clawing and punching Goku.

He then finished with a double palm strike to launch Goku into some giant mushrooms. Goku stammered up hurt, but his hunger was eating at his strength. Ace got in Yamcha's way.

"Seems my friend's a bit winded, so I'll finish it up. Nice technique by the way." Ace said putting his blade back in it's sheath to crack his knuckles.

"My Wolf Fang Fist is unrivaled to none." Yamcha said confidently.

"Well then, I'll just have to copy it and do it better you." Ace said with a wicked smirk. "Supakutatchi! (Sparking Touch)"

Ace's hands were coated his ki and bio-electricity being his first time using it for both hands. He mimicked Yamcha's stance.

"Supākuburakkukonbo: Ōkami (Sparking Black Combo: Wolf Variant)" Ace said charging forward.

Ace's punches mimicked Yamcha's blow for blow with added several kicks to Yamcha's stomach and legs. Yamcha was caught off guard by the thought of something delivering his own attack back at him. To finish off the attack, Ace landed a palm strike on Yamcha's left side. A strike to the right side, and Ace leapt up to finish it with a spin kick to Yamcha's face. The bandit was rolling into the dirt. Pu'ar was dumbfounded, but Yamcha got up rather hurt.

"You copied my technique!" Yamcha yelled clearly annoyed.

"No. I made a new variant of my Sparking Black Combo in the style of your attack. It's more of a spiritual successor." Ace remarked.

"You little shi—" Yamcha said before Bulma woke up.

Even though Yamcha wanted to beat the shit out of the cheeky Ace. The sight of women terrified him, and the two got a brief glance at each other. Yamcha fell over and fled with Pu'ar who just finished kicking the crap out of Oolong with shapeshifting.

"Well that's that." Ace said turning to Goku. "You all right, Goku?"

"I'm fine." Goku said dusting himself off. "That was awesome technique you pulled on him. Think you can pass it on to me."

"Fine, fine. But let's get out of this damn heat." Ace said walking into the shade.

Bulma wanted to know who the cute desert bandit was, but Ace rolled his eyes. He wasn't in mood for it and wanted to rest.

-Ace's Special Attacks-

(A/N: This list is for the attacks that Ace has created on his own, or modified from previous ones to create new ones. I'll post this underneath chapters where Ace forms a new technique.)

Supakutatchi (Sparking Touch) - An attack focusing on electrocuting a foe by focusing ki in tandem with one's bio-electricity into one hand. (Can be used as a palm strike or punch)

Shi no denki-tekina ejji (Electrical Edge of Death) - Ace's version of the Heavy Impact. There two versions to this attack, the lethal one that can kill an opponent and the restrained one which is mean to severely injure an opponent.

Supākuburakkukonbo (Sparking Black Combo)- A combo style of ki empowered punches or kicks. It's rather basic, but isn't anything to underestimate.

Ōkami : The wolf variant of the Sparking Black Combo taking cues from Yamcha's Wolf Fang Fist.