I didn't have any of my morning classes with Tate, but I found out he was a senior while I was still a junior. The ride to school had been silent and as soon as we parked I was out of the car and heading in too school with a small thanks to the blonde boy behind me. I went to the office and got my schedule and locker. During lunch I hid in the bathroom trying to avoid everyone, everyone was too loud and I had a headache plus there was too many males and I was trying not to have a panic attack. I was surprised that I had my last class of the day with Tate; he sat in the back with his head down. When the teacher introduced me to the class his head shot up and he looked at me. I nervously looked down and went and sat down in the only seat available which was next to him.
"Hey." He said as I sat down and i just nodded back. Tate was cute and nice and seemed like he would be a great friend. But I had been traumatized not even a week ago by some guy I didn't even know. I wasn't in the right mind frame for a friend right now. Halfway through class Tate passed me a note.
"Need a ride home?" It read, I lightly bit my lip as I tucked some of my hair behind my ear and glanced at him, he was grinning at me and I rolled my eyes a little as I wrote my replied.
"Thanks but my dad's picking me up for my first therapy appointment." I slid the paper back before I lost my cool and tore it up, not sure why I was telling him about my appointment this afternoon, especially since I just told myself I wasn't in a place for a friend and here I was sharing too much. He wrote back quickly.
"Sounds lame, Constance tries to make me see one too but I barely go. Maybe I can give you a lift to school tomorrow?" He slid the paper back and I slowly read what he wrote. My stomach turned slowly as I tried to get a grip on myself, he was so nice and cute and it just ate at me that I couldn't be nice back to him.
"Maybe." I wrote back and shrugged at him when he looked up at me. I wasn't making any promises. He didn't write anything back and I took that as a sign that he knew I needed to take this more slowly. I was up and out of my seat the second the bell rang. But I slowed down as I neared the parking lot and spotted my dad's car, I really didn't want to go to this therapy appointment. I got in the car and dad didn't say anything to me, not that I expected him to or anything. It took about five minutes to get to the building and he got out with me. I glared at him.
"I can go in myself." I shot at him and he finally turned and looked at me.
"I don't trust you not to double back and ditch the appointment as soon as I drive off." Was his reply and I wrapped my arms around my stomach as I followed behind him not replying because he was right that's what I was going to do. We walked into the office and the receptionist told us Dr. McClaine would be right with us. I sat in the farthest seat from my dad as I could get. He sat with his arms crossed and he was looking at the floor. Five minutes later the receptionist told us she was ready and pointed to a door on the left. My dad knocked lightly then entered the room. Sitting at her desk we saw my new therapist. She was young, younger than I thought she would be, looking around maybe 25 years old. She was pretty with long red hair and stunning eyes. She smiled while she looked my father up and down, and he grinned at her. She stood up and shook my father's hand, then tried to shake mine but I ignored her.
"Hello I am Dr. McClaine, you must be Violet." She said to me and I nodded.
"I am Ben Harmon, her father." My dad said and the Doctor turned to face him.
"Yes we talked on the phone." I rolled my eyes as Ben said his goodbyes and told me he would be back to pick me up in an hour. I ignored him and sat in one of the chairs facing Dr. McClaine's desk, she then sat at her desk and smiled at me.
"Violet you can call me Hayden, makes me feel old when people called me Dr. McClaine." She said with a laugh and I shrugged at her and she looked threw some of her papers.
"So are your wrists all healed up? " Hayden asked and I looked at the floor, apparently she was just going to jump right into it. I shrugged again and rubbed my left wrist, the wrist that I had cut the worst.
"Have you hurt yourself sine you tried to commit suicide two months ago?" Hayden asked and I looked up at her glaring. I told everyone that I wasn't trying to kill myself; I just cut to deep one time. I shook my head but didn't say anything. This women was pissing me off, shouldn't she be waiting for me to tell her all this information.
"Don't feel like talking huh? Well I know your parents didn't force you into a mental hospital because you promised you would do therapy and start over in a new place." Hayden moved some of her hair behind her ear as she looked at my file.
"This doesn't look like you are trying." Hayden looked up at me with a glint in her eyes, like she hated me or something and was trying to cause me pain.
"Do you want me to tell you parents you're not trying and let them send you to a mental hospital mhm?" The women asked and I felt tears pike at my eyes, but I sucked in a breath and held it in, I would not let this women see me cry.
"No." I said shakily and the women grinned.
"Not so hard to talk now is it? So Violet why don't you tell me about the night you tried to kill yourself?" I glared at the wall as I hurriedly wiped a tear from my eye hoping Hayden didn't see it.
"I'll tell you what I told everyone else, I wasn't trying to kill myself it was an accident I just cut a little too deep." I told her in a mumbled voice. The next 45 minutes we about the same, her asking me harsh questions and me replying back in a hard tone. I was thankful when the timer dinged telling me my appointment was over. Hayden walked me out and I saw my dad sitting in one of the waiting room seats. I rolled my eyes at him and hoped he couldn't tell I had been crying.
"Can I talk to you for a moment Dr. McClaine?" My dad asked Hayden and I rolled my eyes as I stalked out of the office and into my dad's car. I slammed the car door behind me and screamed into my backpack as I kicked my feet as hard as I could. I finally started trying to calm down because my dad would flip if he saw he like this. He came out of the office five minutes later and we left. He didn't say anything as we drove home and as soon as we got home I ran out of the car and up to my room.
I slammed the door when I got to my room and put on music, cranking it up as loud as I could and I started pulling at my hair. I was so mad at Hayden, who did she think she was? All I wanted to do was grab a razor and cut myself but my dad checked my wrist and legs often to make sure I wasn't cutting again and if he found just one cut he told me he would send me to a mental hospital. I angrily wiped the tears from my eyes as I sat hunched in the corner of my room trying to calm down. Everything was just getting to me, I was barely sleeping and when I did sleep I was having nightmares about the rape. I dozed off in the corner and snapped out of it when my mom banged on the door telling me to turn the music down. I got up from my corner and turned down the volume. Then I grabbed my pack of cigarettes and snuck out of my room and out the front door. I stood off to the side of the house and lit up a cigarette and started puffing it down. I started feeling a little relaxed. Suddenly the door front door across the street opened and a young man exited and then slammed it as hard as he could while screaming a 'fuck you' to someone inside. I realized it was Tate and hid behind the bush a little so he wouldn't see me. I watched as he got into his car and started it before angrily driving off. I put out my cigarette once he turned a corner down the street and went back into the house wonder what happed to make him so pissed off.
AN: I can't believe it's been so long since I updated! Sorry about that, but I have so many ideas in my head for this story that it shouldn't be such a long wait for the next chapter! Also this chapter would be a lot longer but I have a million things to do right now. Update soon I promise! Also let me know if anyone is even reading this or likes this so I can know if I should continue or not.