Author's Note: HAPPY THANKSGIVING!- I am so thankful to all of you wonderful readers, who support, encourage and help me through the process of writing this story. Whether you celebrate this holiday or not, I hope you have a wonderful Turkey Day!
Disclaimer: Star Wars is owned by Disney and Lucasfilm Ltd. The following work is not intended to add to, promote or distort this series. This is a work of fanfiction, and the author does not profit in posting. This is simply a writing exercise written for fun.
Padme paced the apartment anxiously for nearly an hour as she awaited Anakin's return from the temple. Her handmaidens had long left for home, and the stars outside were now struggling to shine through the light pollution of the city-planet. Leia sat outside, underneath them, pondering as she observed her mother's furious steps inside their home.
She'd inquired several times as to what was troubling the woman, but her mother proved to be as stubborn as the rest of the family: such a fantastic trait. Even as Leia grimaced that thought away, she too found herself contemplating all that she saw. New clarity had built itself up in her.
Clarity from her father.
The moment he'd called out to her to claim her own form, she'd understood the one thing Luke could not make clear for her; even a Jedi had their own identity in the Force. They had their own approach and their own style. It was something that needed to be embraced. And part of her wondered if Luke could not teach her this because he too was struggling with this idea. It makes sense, but how great would he become if he could accept his own approach?
It did not surprise her that her father was so well versed in the subject, seeming as he lived by the beat of his own drum. What did surprise her, however, was that the Jedi dogma was so convoluted around this idea. Be yourself and be one with the Force.
Something seemed lost in translation.
"Do you think he's coming home?" Padme suddenly asked, snapping the woman out of her thoughts. She was still now, staring at the door like a lost child. Sighing, Leia exited the terrace and entered the living room.
Sitting down and inviting Padme beside her, Leia confessed, "No, I do not." She paused as she observed her mother's reactions, which ranged from relief to worry and disappointment. "And I know this because I wouldn't come home... Coming home meant I'd found a solution to all the feelings I have, and I know it would take me quite a bit of time, and for father..."
"... It could be a while more." Padme finished, sighing as she sat back on her sofa. "It's sad that I am glad about him staying away... it really is."
Leia nodded, "But you also have much to think about." Frowning, Padme replied with a quick nod.
"Till all of this happened," she confessed, "I never once worried about my safety around Anakin. He always came through. He was always my protector... and now he's my-" her voice trailed off.
"You are afraid of him?" Leia wondered, surprised, given all she had learned about her mother.
Sitting back up, Padme confessed, "I'm afraid that I've already lost him... Seeing what he could do in the Senate when he was really... upset, I- I feel as though he's already the monster that will end my life." She then sighed and swallowed another thought, allowing the next one through, "What's worse is that I am afraid I pushed him away, with all my convictions and-"
"-don't even think that." Leia interrupted her, shaking her head, "Someone can't truly love you without loving your convictions too, believe me."
Frowning, Padme furrowed a brow and informed Leia, "I am a strong partisan against the war, constantly trying to decelerate it... He's a general in the grand army of the republic."
Frowning back, Leia turned her nose upward slightly and retorted, "I am a strong partisan raised as a princess struggling to ensure fairness, diplomacy, and equality to all... and my husband is a former smuggler and general that believes in a shoot-first-ask-questions-later policy." She then paused and punctuated her argument firmly, "And we make it work."
As Padme absorbed that idea, Leia stood up and stretched, pushing some couches aside with the Force so she could practice more of what she learned earlier that day. "Loving someone," Leia added thoughtfully, "Is about bringing out the best in them... Do you believe he brings out the best in you?"
She began her forms as Padme digested the question. Something about the way she moved now seemed so freeing, fulfilling really, she didn't want to stop this new form of 'dancing.' As her hair flew about her, her clothes flowing as though caught in a wind, she breathed in and out effortlessly, shifting from step to step. It was as though the beat of the galaxy were drumming away as she moved about the room, an unfamiliar peace making its way into her heart.
Her trance was only broken by the stare of her mother on her. "What's the matter?" Leia asked in uncertainty.
Padme swallowed a moment before inquiring, "Do you think you could..." she stopped herself, as though the idea were ludicrous.
"Could what?" Leia wondered, stepping closer to her mother curiously.
The younger woman took a deep breath, almost seeming child-like as she sent a pleading gaze towards her daughter from the future, "Do you think you could teach me some of those Jedi moves?"
Caught by surprise, Leia had to ask her to repeat her request before she could process it. "I... I suppose, but without ample connection to the Force, they won't do you very much good in a fight." That didn't seem to concern Padme, and so Leia inquired, "May I ask why?"
Nodding, Padme stood up and confessed, "Because he does make me a better person. Every single day, I think of him and strive to do what's right. But I'm not sure I'm doing the same for him, even if he does fight to protect the republic. I don't know how to reach him all the time. His world is so foreign to me, so I thought that maybe, with a little extra knowledge, I could help him more."
Smiling, Leia nodded, "It does help." she admitted, lost in a memory, "Though Luke and I always had an odd bond between us, I felt very cut off from him until I learned the ways of the Force. Now, I feel I can speak to him with the same level of understanding he speaks to me. He had to do the same with politics, come to think of it." She added that last part with a laugh, her mother joining in.
Filled with a new hope, Padme nodded and stepped closer to Leia, eagerness in her eyes, "So... where do we start?" Chuckling, Leia sighed as she contemplated that herself.
Anakin frowned as he stared at the large double doors that led into his greatest confidant's office. It was late, and he wasn't even sure that the man was still working, but he was so desperate for someone to talk to, someone that wasn't anyone related to the Jedi or Padme, that he would have waited all night just to speak with him.
And, as if answering his inner desire, the door swung open, revealing the small man clad in elaborate governmental robes and escorted by four blue-clad guards. "Anakin?" Chancellor Palpatine greeted him with a wide grin, perhaps the only one he'd seen since the incident that afternoon, "I was hoping to speak with you! I hear you are the reason my senators walked out of here alive earlier today."
Blushing a little, Anakin shrugged, "It wasn't all me, chancellor."
Gesturing that the man join him in escorting him to his limousine, Anakin fell into step alongside Palpatine, his cloak swishing as he moved. Palpatine was quick to make the connection, "Ah yes, I heard that Ms. Darklighter was also a large part of our victory this day." He then paused, turning to catch Anakin sigh at the mention of her name.
He halted the group, raising a fist to indicate that he wanted his body guards to stay back, and then motioned that they continue down the abandoned, yet ornate, hall, "What's wrong, Anakin?" the older man wanted to know.
Shrugging, Anakin turned away as he pulled his thoughts together, "What would you do if you knew you were going to do something terrible, but you aren't sure why you will?"
Palpatine brought his hand to his chin as he contemplated that, "Well, clearly I would investigate the allegation before making a reasonable decision. Why?" Again, Anakin paused to collect an answer, but Palpatine did not wait for him, "Did Ms. Darklighter make some odd accusation?" The slight flinch he noted in Anakin indicated he'd made his mark.
"She..." Anakin paused, taking a deep breath. He stopped by a large window and stared out it, not wanting to face the man who was, for the most part, his father figure when admitting that "She says that I will kill someone I care for."
Furrowing his brow, Palpatine wondered, "She had a premonition about this?" To that, Anakin shook his head, "Then what, my boy?"
Laughing a little, Anakin scratched at his head nervously, "She... it's the stupidest thing, she claims to be from the future." Palpatine stopped, his eyes wide as his mind attempted to fathom just how something like that could happen.
And so he reasoned, "Well, clearly she's crazy."
Chuckling once more, Anakin nodded, "That's what I said... But-"
"There is more?" Palpatine wondered, amazed he was even entertaining this ludicrous idea.
"She's my daughter." Freezing in his place, the old man worked the cogs of his mind, turning through various ideas until everything made sense. Her power, her anonymity, it all fit. As Skywalker's offspring, she would have all those things, but the ultimate question became 'how?' It was physically impossible to traverse time, to his knowledge, though that, while impressive, even had its limits.
If she is his daughter, Palpatine realized, suddenly understanding her distance from him, then she knows everything I have planned. He turned his eyes back to Anakin, knowing now more than ever that he needed to discredit the woman.
"And what of her proof?" the older man inquired carefully, making it seem as though he believed this to be one big joke.
"Proof?" Anakin replied, his brows raised. He too had asked this question.
"Yes," Palpatine retorted, almost a little too fast and too harsh for his normal character, "Tangible evidence that you broke the Jedi code and started a family... You, their shining star, the hero with no fear. I say it isn't possible."
"Tangible evidence." Anakin echoed, recalling his demands for the same thing. Demands that were left unanswered as he was left in shock at Padme's revelation.
"DNA proof, maybe some memento or knowledge." Palpatine listed, getting more worked up by the minute as his anger with himself built up inside. He was furious, not only had he missed all the signs these two possessed unusual knowledge, but he actually became obsessed with the woman enough to risk his own position to have her.
"I suppose I could ask." the younger man considered, plotting in his mind how he would find a way to ask these things of Leia without seeing Padme. It was a tricky puzzle given Leia's current task of guarding her supposed mother. Palpatine nodded, convinced that a time traveler would not agree to such a risky maneuver. If it were him, he would have struggled to keep his presence under the radar as much as possible.
"If you think it's necessary." he told Anakin without remorse, "Though the entire story sounds ridiculous to me." The silence beside him was recognized as his window into the next phase of his plan. "Now," he started slowly, breaking the young man's train of thought, "I have to ask you something, regarding that amazing feat from this afternoon: how has the Jedi council reacted?"
Sighing, Anakin shrugged, "They fear me." he admitted, "Some even wish to expel me."
Frowning, Palpatine nodded, "I suspected as much, given their record in dealing with you... Tell me, what are you going to do about that peculiar, raw power?"
Stopping near a main hallway, Anakin confessed, "I hadn't given it much thought, honestly."
Excellent. "If I were you, I would explore it." he admitted, "Talents such as yours could save lives, especially during wartime."
Shrugging once more, Anakin explained to the wiser man, "That power was driven by emotion, something forbidden in the order... to pursue it is to toe the line of the darkside. I'm not sure I want to take that risk."
Not surprised, yet not thwarted, Palpatine suggested, "What is there to really gain if there is no risk in it Anakin?" The young man had no answer for him, his shoulders slouching slightly as the weight of yet another demand rested upon them. He was getting tired of his burdens, especially the burden of his own power.
"I'll not fall to the darkside." he outright told the man, "I'll not become what Leia says I will."
Palpatine noted the name Anakin shared for later, not wanting to lose focus on his current objective, "You speak of the darkside as though it is evil and the Jedi are good."
Surprised, Anakin stared at the man, his ocean colored eyes trapped under a furrowed brow, "Because they are."
Smiling, Palpatine motioned that Anakin follow him into a small study near the entrance of his quarters in the senate hall. Inside were various DataPads carrying a variety of information, "Let me tell you something that took me many years to understand, Anakin." Palpatine started as he pulled a chair out for the taller man to sit in, "Good and evil are not as simple as light and dark, and neither are the Sith or the Jedi. Everything is about perspectives." He pulled out an old DataPad and passed it to the man, "From my private collection... it is the journal of a Sith general from one of the later wars in the Old Republic. It might offer you some insight about your new situation."
Anakin stared at the document, his nose wrinkled as though disgusted to even be holding the DataPad, "Why would you even have this?" he wondered. Palpatine merely smiled.
"To gain perspective." He informed the young man, "Read this book and gather evidence to tell me for fact; was this man truly evil or just misguided?" Anakin swallowed a lump in his throat and then nodded.
"Thank you, chancellor."
As their ship passed through the endless space at light speed, Obi-Wan attempted to gain clarity in the Force about his Padawan. He found, however, that his thoughts were being distracted by another odd pull in the Force. Something both foreboding and enlightening. He wasn't quite sure if he should fear or welcome what was to come.
The hunt for Darklighter had been slow going at first, since the man was clearly capable of masking his enormous power. To his surprise, Obi-Wan was suddenly grateful that Quinlan Vos had been assigned to this task with him.
Despite being in space, the man's tracking skills were phenomenal, even if his dogma was a little radical for a Jedi. In many ways, the outside the box approach Quinlan utilized reminded Obi-Wan of Qui-Gon, his former master, and Anakin, his former Padawan.
The spiritual abilities of these men, their mental disposition and their perspectives on the Force were all radically different, and yet the same in the idea that they should have the freedom to explore these channels. Qui-Gon had refused the chair offered to him by the Council on more than one occasion, simply because he did not believe that chair offered him purpose. His individuality and disregard for protocol often brought a sweat to Obi-Wan's brow while he was training.
Quinlan was much like Qui-Gon in that facet, though his intellect felt less like sage wisdom and more like disconnected dots.
And Anakin... What Windu had said about him had sprung a new series of questions into Obi-Wan's mind. What was at the root of Anakin's immaturity as a Jedi? What made him so desperate to advance quickly? Something in the Force told him prestige, but he knew for fact that Anakin was above such indulgences.
So what is it then?
"Something's on your mind." Quinlan suddenly suggested, not looking away from his galactic star map, where he was concentrating, "I can feel it in the Force."
Frowning, Obi-Wan stood and walked over to where the other Jedi stood, his dark dreadlocks shadowing his painted face. "I apologize." He offered, "I hope it hasn't disrupted your concentration."
"Not at all." Was the response as the man turned to smirk at him, "I just wonder if there is something I can do to quell those thoughts."
Obi-Wan shrugged and shook his head, "I'm not sure that anyone can. The order sure hasn't come up with a solution in the past ten or so years."
Chuckling, Quinlan returned to his star map and shook his head in amusement, "Ah, so it is Skywalker." Nodding, Obi-Wan leaned on the wall, that weird, impending feeling overwhelming him once more. After a time, Quinlan admitted, "Perhaps Darklighter will understand his dilemma."
With a sigh, Obi-Wan replied "I've stopped hoping for easy answers."
"No good answer is easy." Quinlan replied, "We have to work for it, end of story." That did little to quell the feeling in Obi-Wan's gut.
"Such a shame Anakin doesn't feel that way about his training. He's so prideful, it hinders him."
There was a spell of silence as the two men deliberated their tasks at hand, but after a time, Quinlan pointed out something Obi-Wan had not considered before, "What if his eagerness has nothing to do with his pride?"
The descent onto Advorosia was a lot smoother this time than the last, and Luke exhaled shakily with pride at his ship. It was intact, no damage of any sort. It seemed that his peculiar orange light was effective, even if it wasn't cost effective.
He rested a short while before crossing over the harsh, forested landscape. This planet clearly had multiple biomes, something he found fascinating, having come from a desolate world. All around him was life, even while the Shaetin lost on the world roamed about. It impressed him, how strong life truly was.
As he came into a clearing, he spotted what looked like a group of sentients. Figuring them to be the natives of the land, he was cautious in his approach, raising his hands up to show he meant them no harm. His boot snapped a branch, startling the four of them, who stood round the base of a tree talking. They turned to him, their masked eyes and odd noses taking in everything they could about him on the wind. Gifted with a grand mane of gray and brown, two of the group began to cautiously approach him, curiosity in their yellow eyes. Knowing better than to speak unless spoken to, Luke kept silent while they investigated him.
Yet, as they did, their rounds were cut short by a harsh wind carrying a heavy wave of cold energy. The darkside.
Luke turned quickly as the natives ran off, a determined look in his eyes as he prepared for whatever was about to come next. With a deep sigh, he turned, hi shand on the hilt of his lightsaber. Before him stood the grinning form of someone vaguely familiar. He was both young and strong in appearance, yet oddly sick. His dark hair was pulled back, his eyes glowing a fierce red.
"Hello Luke." Gerali's voice came from this man, "Welcome back home."
Carefully and subtly drawing his lightsaber, Luke took a defensive stance, "So the venom finally claimed you." he remarked, hiding his disappointment as best he could. Grinning, Gerali nodded, donning no signs of ill will.
"It was only a matter of time." he admitted, his visage dissipating when the wind blew into smoke. Luke sensed him reform behind him, and turned, lightsaber ignited. "I had hoped you would return before I lost myself to the darkside, but no matter... I am still lucid enough to instruct you on the lights I once carried."
Surprised, Luke lowered his guard only slightly, "So you are not all lost?"
Smiling, Gerali reminded Luke, "Was your father?"
Deactivating his lightsaber, Luke lowered his arms and stood upright, his mind still processing this new information. Namely in how Gerali had known of his father. When it registered that Gerali was willing to be his new master, he forced those many wonderings aside for later. With great cautions still, he stepped forward, "Then where should we begin?"
With a slight nod to the side, his distant relative informed him, "We will start with the light you already bear... I trust you can wield it in entirety?" Luke nodded, "Excellent! With time the wear on you will lessen, especially as your power continues to grow."
Luke frowned at that fact... he didn't want to even think about gaining more presence in the Force. His own power was difficult enough to mask as it was.
"Is all our family this powerful?" Luke wondered aloud, bringing confusion to Gerali's face, "I am told my father was curiously strong with the Force, and that my sister and I mimic that oddity. Was my grandmother also so?"
Smiling while in memory, Gerali shook his head, "Your mother was no stronger than any member of our family, who could be challenged by many of the tribes across Advorosia." he admitted as he stepped closer, "What made her so unique was her compassion and respect for life... Where as we felt the need to impose our ways on others, she felt a strong desire to protect the ideals of our new claims. I suppose that, in a way, that made her more powerful than the rest of us... Even Anakin Windrider."
He paused once more, a far off look in his eye, "Were she to have risen to power, I truly believe that she would have united all of Advorosia in a steady peace."
Curious, Luke inquired, "Why are the Advorosians so harsh?"
His concentration back on Luke, Gerali motioned that the man follow him to a nearby clearing, "It stems from our Drajdai roots... Unlike the Jedi, who practiced the light side through serenity, we practiced the light side through conviction. If you think the Jedi are cold and distant... imagine a group of people who distanced themselves entirely from compassion."
Luke frowned as he nodded, attempting to fathom how cold a culture could be without the bounty offered by mercy. "This sounds like the Sith."
Gerali nodded, "The Drajdai are as akin to the Sith as the Shaetin are. A Sith is governed, however, by passion. They put their desires above all other things. The Shaetin feed on the darkness in others, unable to produce any more darkness than their venom can muster..." he then paused, stopping Luke beside a large boulder in the field, "But a Drajdai eliminates darkness. Their dogma is specifically to eradicate all potential sources of fuel for the Shaetin cause, and their techniques are harsh to mirror this purpose... And their personalities must match this as well."
"So," Luke realized, "A Drajdai does not know forgiveness."
Grinning, Gerali added, "And now you see why it has been some time since another true Drajdai has appeared. We all have chinks in our armor, places we give way to in our convictions, desires to protect those who are wrong simply because we hope they will be right some day." Luke nodded, unsure now more than ever if he wanted to pursue this path.
Forgiveness was a large part of his character. Hope too, for that matter.
"Ah," Gerali teased, "Now you see your limits in this endeavor." He sat down on the boulder, his form rustled by the winds passing by. "I will teach you the lights I know, but I encourage you to learn no more of them than these."
"Why?"
Smiling, Gerali watched his hand disappear into the air before reforming again, "Because the lights I will teach you are not as unforgiving as the others... It is only when you have mastered them all that you face the full purge of your sympathy." Luke nodded, understanding.
He then sat down on the grass before Gerali.
"The first light you know is the one Anakin taught you in between times." his new master began, the red of his eyes fading to green as he spoke, "From the spectrum of light, this is orange light... We often refer to it as burning light, as it is known to burn the darkness from the area around it's user."
Luke shrugged, and turned his eyes away, "It almost seemed to kill those nearby, even the one I wanted to save."
Gerali's eyes grew intense, "So you have demonstrated your power to your enemy." He paused and sighed, "This does not bode well... I sense my brother behind this mess, and I fear that he will aim to overcome your new skills with even deadlier ones. Even trickery or foul play is not beyond him anymore."
"Why is he after me?" Luke wondered, his icy-colored eyes wide. It was apparent the longing in them to be cared for by all in his family.
With a sigh, the apparition shook his head, "Because you are just like the man he could have been... had compassion been introduced into his life as a child. He was the oldest, the heir to our father's tribe, and so his life was far harsher than any of ours. He was once a kind young boy, but every instance of benevolence was snuffed out by our instructors, our sages... sometimes even our own parents. I would not be surprised if he carries the scars from his childhood with him to this very day, and embodies all his hate in you because of it."
Luke sighed, suddenly feeling the compassion of his grandmother in his chest. Now he understood why she wanted so desperately to save him.
"But if I use burning light on him..." Luke realized with a frown, the thought of a confrontation with this still absent foe turning his stomach. Gerali nodded.
"You will wipe out his very existence."
Padme smiled as she caught her breath, sweat falling along her brow and nearing her eyes. Leia knew how to work out, that was for sure!
They had spent most of the morning going through basic forms and stances, with Leia hardly allowing room for a break. Dogma of the Jedi had slowly entered the instruction, but only as much as Padme could handle before her own personal outlook began to reject the information.
She knew one thing for sure, being a Jedi was no fine line.
Yet neither is being a senator, she reminded herself as she stood upright once more, training blade in hand. It was only then that she noticed the time. "I think it is time we get ready."
Smiling, Leia turned about and took note of the Chrono, nodding as she deactivated her own blade. As Padme approached with one of the training blades Leia had 'borrowed' from the temple the night before, she raised a hand and shook her head. "Perhaps a small training weapon would be worth keeping on your person while at work." She suggested, bringing a smile to Padme's face.
The two women then parted ways, with Padme heading into her fresher to put on her work face. Carefully, she set down the hilt of the blade on the counter, pride in her eyes as she realized the major step she had taken. Diplomacy was always a two way street, but it required understanding. She was now acquiring the very understanding she needed to be more diplomatic with her husband.
Moments later, she'd exited her chambers with a subtle purple and blue dress on. Her hair had once more been twisted up into another grand style, indicating both status and power for those that would question her.
Leia was soon at her side, a fresh set of Jedi-styled clothes donned while her hair was allowed to flow freely about the base of her neck.
"Shall we then?" She asked her with a slight grin, still proud of her accomplishments over the past two days. Leia merely nodded and ushered that her mother lead the way.
As they exited the space, Padme's thoughts wandered out to Anakin, who still had not returned home. It's all for the best, she reminded herself, he needs his space too, sometimes.
Author's Note: I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! It was a lot of fun writing in all these philosophical dilemmas. I'm curious myself to see where all these questions lead. Please let me know what you think! It is always so much fun reading all of your reviews.
And again, Happy Thanksgiving!