When you say that it's gonna be,
It always turns out to be a different way,
I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today
Samira Rider, 16
District 6 Female
"DAMNIT!" I shout as the thread machine used in the tire factory knicks my finger. "That hurt like hell!"
"Samira! Are you okay?!" ask the worker that sits next to me every day.
"Do I look okay?!" I respond.
The look on their face says that I've hurt them, but I didn't mean to. I don't know why I am like this, but that's just me. I want to apologize to him, to tell him I'm sorry, to tell him that I know I'm a jerk. To be frank, I'm not sure how.
I've never really been the girl that fits in. I'm not like dances with their grandma's underwear around her head weird, but I'm hot headed. Oh boy, I'm hot-headed! I'm also snarky as I'll get out with an acid tongue. I'm bitter because I feel I was unjustly dealt a rough hand while so many undeserving people around me have so much. I'm sad, because of the fact, as much as I try, and as much as I long for it. I'll never be like them.
That's the killer in this.
I've always wanted to have someone. Maybe not in a romantic sense, I mean, that'd be great too. But I mean friendship wise..it would be nice to be able to talk to someone. To let them know my problems. To allow someone in.
I can't do that. I've never been able to do that.
"I...I'm sorry," I say quickly. "I shouldn't have responded that way."
He shrugs his shoulders and then smiles at me. "It's okay," he says. "You were in pain."
He takes my hand and begins to inspect it and I instantly flinch back. He puts his hands up in the air over his head as if to show he's non-threatening and then I reluctantly give him my hand back. He begins to looks over it and then frowns.
"Oh no." he says.
"What!?" I say nervously.
"It's the worst...I...we have to chop it off."
"WHAT!?" I scream ripping my hand back and hiding it from him. He begins to laugh. Laugh so hard that he falls to the ground. I look at him confused and then realize he's kidding as I roll my eyes and turn back to the machine I was working on. I press the start button and begin to monitor the movement of the threading.
"You know we've worked together here for four years and this is the most we've ever talked." says my work neighbor.
I continue to watch over the machine as he talks about various things in his life. He tells me about his parents, about his sister and her good for nothing boyfriend. She's apparently knocked up but their parents don't know anything about it. I find that hard to believe, though. My parents know everything.
"What about you?" he asks me.
"Hm?" I respond.
"Oh so you do have a voice?" he ask me questioningly. "I just assumed you magically became a mute. Tell me about yourself Samira. You've always so...quiet and serious. What's behind that mask that you put up."
"I'm sorry did I fall into a storybook where I'm the heroine and you're the funny sidekick that pulls me out of my small little world. Do you open up my eyes and show me that even though I've had struggles in my life it's all okay because now I have a new open mind?" I ask clicking the stop button on my machine. "Look, I'm flattered I really am, but let's be honest. I'm no good. This friendship has one ending and it's not a pretty one. I appreciate what you're trying to do. I really do. I just...it's easier for you this way. Trust me."
He smiles at me! This guy is so arrogant that even after all that he smiles at me! Who even is he!?
"Challenge accepted." he says as he turns his machine back on and oversees his thread.
"That wasn't a-"
"No, challenge accepted," he says smiling.
I roll my eyes and continue to do my work that I'm paid to do. It takes me a moment, but I realize that what I've been wanting all this time is a friend. Now that one is knocking at my door...I'm chasing them away. Why do I do this to myself?
I'm always screaming my lungs out 'til my head starts spinning
Playing my songs is the way I cope with life
Won't keep my voice down
Know the words I speak are the thoughts I think out loud
Maxwell "Max" Hurley, 17
District 6 Male
"Bye Samira!" I say as I punch out of my factory position. I set my time card back into the cardholder on the wall and smile at her as she does the same. I've been her shadow pretty much all day. I meant it when I said challenge accepted.
To no surprise, at all, she doesn't say anything as she begins to walk down the long hallway towards the exit. I follow her, initially having to jog she walks so fast, and end up in front of the door.
"Excuse me," she says trying to push past me. I continue to block the door, however, so she throws her head back and lets out a groan. "What!" she says. "What could you possibly want?!"
"Let's hang out," I say plainly.
She gives me a weird look that tells me, A, she doesn't understand the question. Or, B, she doesn't know how to respond to the question. Either way, this is doing exactly what I wanted from the girl. It's getting her thinking and allowing her to see I'm not going to give up.
"No.,." she says as she again tries to push past me.
"Unfortunately mam," I begin, "I don't understand your answer. Look, this isn't a date. You've worked with me for years and I haven't done something even remotely weird-"
"You said we had to chop my hand off,"
"Sarcasm is dead to you isn't it?" I respond quickly.
She rolls her eyes and pushes past me walking through the door. As she's walking down the front steps I continue to follow her. She walks like she doesn't see me and then after about three blocks she finally stops and turns to me.
"You're going to continue to do this until I give in right? Like, it's either I give in and hang out with you today or you continue to do this until I do?"
"Sounds about righ," I say nodding quickly.
She lets out an annoyed sigh and then rolls her eyes and shrugs. "Okay," she says. "Where are we going?"
"Wait seriously?"
"You're annoying and I don't have it in me to continue this pursuit. So yes, hurry, before I change my mind."
"Come on!" I say as I gesture for her to follow.
We walk down the street, past the main square, past the tall buildings in our district and I lead her to the outskirts of our District. There is an old abandoned warehouse that is my favorite place in the entire world that I'm pretty excited to share with her.
"Is this where you kill me?" she asks questioningly. "Because I don't think I'm ready to die quite yet, and-"
"Samira, do me a favor? Shut up for a minute." I say as I go to the broken window that I covered with a piece of old wood. I move it to the side and jump in holding my hand out for her to grab on. She stands in front of the window and looks scared.
"Do you trust me?" I ask
"I don't even know your name," she responds.
"Well, I'm Max," I say smiling. "Now do you trust me?"
"Do I have a choice?"
I nod my head no as she rolls her eyes and then jumps into the warehouse window. The sun is shining through the glass windows so it's easy to see around the warehouse. It's filled with multiple old wheels which I'm sure we could still use with some patching up.
"Alright, almost there," I say as I lead us up to a wall with a rope attached. I stop at the wall and turn around and smile at her.
"You brought me to a wall?" she asks skeptically.
"No, but I brought you to the place after you scale it." I grab onto the rope and begin to climb up.
I don't know how I'll feel,
Tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
Tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day
Samira Rider, 16
District 6 Female
It took me a long time to shimmy up that rope. Over the course of my climbing, I realized a number of things. The first of which is I'm absolutely terrified of heights. The second of which is that I don't know what it is about me that makes this boy want to know me...but I'm glad he does. I might not show it, but I'm glad to get the chance to actually have a friend.
Standing on top of this building is amazing. I can see the whole District from up here. It's beautiful imagining everyone in their homes right now settling down for dinner. Talking with their families about their days. The things that I've never gotten to do.
"This is beautiful," I say looking around and taking it all in.
"Yeah, this is where I come when things get hard," he says. "I've always imagined the people like tiny ants that are crawling around. Each thinking they have a purpose, but just kind of casually moving through the hill working for the Queen."
"That was a little depressing," I remark.
"But it's true." he says.
I've never seen people that way. They've always been pleasant from my idea of them. Maybe it's because I don't know many, or maybe it's because I've never really gotten along with anyone so I've made ideas in my head. However, I still have hope that I can live up to more than just being a worker for the Capitol.
"I don't think so," I respond to him. "Maybe it's from lack of experience, but I genuinely think people have a purpose. I think that we are all here for that said purpose, and we can't die until we finish said purpose."
I've never shared that with anyone before. I must be really captivated by this scene, or maybe Max and I are supposed to be friends. I look off into the distance and imagine Max and I talking about our days and how much we hate our jobs. Laughing as we walk to the bakery and get a cupcake that we stole.
"What do you think yours is?" he asks me.
I pause because this is something I really haven't thought about. I always thought that if I had a purpose it would just pop out one day. I don't even really know myself and I'm expected to know my purpose? Though I don't think those two things are mutually exclusive I think they are beneficiaries of each other.
"I don't know," I say. "I think that life is almost like a puzzle if you will. Each person is working on a different section, and if you looked at mine..you wouldn't see much put together. I believe that a purpose is something you're supposed to find, I think. I actually just came up with a lot of this in my head, but I think that I'm looking for mine still."
He doesn't look at me as I give my explanation, but I can tell he's listening. He runs his fingers through his hair and clears his throat as he gets up and begins to walk along the edge of the building. I tense as I watch him but he smiles my way as if reading my mind.
"I do this literally all the time," he says reassuring me. "But I don't know my purpose either. But I know I'm made for something great."
"How can you be sure?" I ask him.
I've always been jealous of people who are confident. Those pretty girls in my District who have everything their hearts desire, those pretty boys in my district that have it all. Max probably would fall into the pretty boy category, but if that's the case I don't see why he's hanging out with me.
"Because I wake up, and I feel the earth calling to me." he says proudly.
I chuckle, and then continue to do so until it turns into a giant laugh. "That's literally the stupidest thing I've ever hear!" I say in between giggle fits. I wipe my eyes and stare back at him. "The earth cannot call to you when you're trapped in the box that is our District."
"Box or no box, I'm going to be somebody, Samira," he says rebelliously. "Mark my words." he faces me and then waves as he falls back off the building. I scream as I run to the edge to see him on a floor balcony just a few feet down. There is and pillows there.
"What the hell you psychopath!" I scream. "I thought you just offed yourself right in front of me."
"People that have expectations of themselves don't kill themselves." he says confidently "Now, are you going to come down and talk some more or just stay up there the whole time?"
"Do you live here?"
"Only when I'm stressed out," he says as I mount the edge of the building shakily. I take a deep breath and let my feet slide off the edge of the roof.
I like to keep things honest
I'm a safe bet like your life's staked on it, for real
I'd hate to keep you all wondering
I'm constant like the seasons, I will never be forgotten man
Maxwell "Max" Hurley, 17
District 6 Male
The sun shines down and my eyes flutter open. Samira lies next to me under one of the many blankets I had on the secret balcony room I have. I guess we fell asleep talking last night.
I would never have guessed the girl had such a depth to her. Something about her way of seeing things has really opened my eyes to who she is. I like it. Not in a romantic sense, but I can see us being good friends.
"Samira," I say, but before I'm able to say it again to wake her up the bells to let everyone know the reapings are in 30 minutes sound. Her eyes shoot open upon hearing them and then she looks around and sees where she is at.
"Oh my gosh. My parents are going to kill me," she says as she rolls out of bed and throws the blanket down. She begins to run off the balcony and then turns around and comes back. "I don't know how to get out of here," she says.
I laugh and slide off the mattress. I head over to a ladder on the wall and we slowly make our way through the not fully lit warehouse. When we arrive at the front of it, the bell rings again letting us know we have 20 minutes left.
"We're going to be late." she says nervously.
"No, we won't," I say taking off running.
It takes her a minute to catch up, but we are soon sprinting our way into the town square. We are the only two in line once we finally reach where they are checking kids in, and the Peacekeepers give us a disappointed look.
"Cutting it a bit close, no?" they ask as they prick our fingers.
"I thought we were making a fashionable entrance," I say to which Samira gets a good chuckle.
The escort is already on stage reading the treaty and the agreement the Capitol made for the districts as Samira and I take our respective places.
"Well, we shall waste no more time then," she says as she walks back to the ladies bowl and digs around in the envelopes. She settles on one that is at the very bottom of the bowl and smiles as she traces her hand over it. Almost like she's feeling if she has a winner.
"The female tribute from District 6 is...Samira Rider!"
I stare at the stage slack-jawed as my new friend walks towards the stage looking stone cold. At least she is thinking ahead about sponsors and not freaking out right now. That will suit her well.
"Hello dear!" says the escort. "Tell us about yourself!"
"Or not." says Samira coldly as she flips her hair to the side.
The escort looks shocked at her response and the audience chuckles. That's a winning attitude kid. The escort clearly to shocked to say anything walks back to the stage again and digs for another name. This time settling for a name that's perfectly in the middle.
"Maxwell Hurley," she says clearly not in the mood for dramatics.
"What the absolute mother fu-"
"We don't use language like that on television!" screams the escort at Samira from the stage.
I walk towards the stage and I hope the audience can't see my knees shaking. As I stand in front of the escort and Samira she looks at me with a concerning look.
"You okay?" she asks me.
"I can't feel my body," I respond.
"Tell us about yourself?" ask the escort.
"Uh," I say not sure what to say. "I'll go with what she said and leave it at 'or not'"
"The nerve of you disrespectful ass children!" says the escort.
"We don't use language like that on television," says Samira scolding
"DISTRICT 6 YOUR BRATTY TRIBUTES SAMIRA AND MAX!"
This chapter sucked. I'm so sorry. I've been sick and this was just really hard to write.
Thanks for sticking with me. Sorry for the lateness.
I've noticed a sigificant decrease in reviews also...I'm sorry if I'm disappointing y'all.
Keep it classy,
Caleb