Green eyes were fixed upon him. Loki's name had broken free from his throat in a hearty shout. Like a witch summoning a demon with magic words, his sinful activity and muttered lust had called his brother to him at the height of his pleasure. Seeing him, seeing him watch him back at that moment only added to the pleasure and the horror he felt inside. His seed squirted up high before arcing, coming back down and hitting the bedspread with a deafening 'sploot'. Naked, legs spread, dick out, and coming while crying his brother's name. What more could be said?
"Loki," he said softer this time. Thor's eyes focused as embarrassment and self-loathing flooded his being.
Loki's looked him over. He noted the pillow with his shirt from yesterday pulled over it, which Thor clutched to his body like a lover. His hand on his pulsing cock. His name tumbling from such sweet lips.
"I knew it," Loki started.
"Brother forgive me!" Thor put his arm out towards Loki, expecting him to flee in disgust. But Loki didn't. He just stood there. His eyes looked down as though he was processing what he'd seen. He sighed and cast his eyes up to look upon Thor once more.
"I don't want to forgive you. I want what you want. Thor, I want you."
"Brother…"
"Yes, we are brothers, and we need to talk about that. Let us be honest. You are gay, correct?"
"Yes."
"And you wouldn't tell me because you wanted me."
"Yes."
"I've wanted you too, for a while now," he said.
"Loki, it's not right. You're vulnerable and dependent upon me, and your feelings are just mixed up from…"
"Bullshit! I've felt this way since before they died. Every time you came over to visit, I couldn't get enough of my big beautiful brother. I was afraid to admit that what I felt for you was more than brotherly affection. That my feelings for you had turned into something taboo and shameful. The problem is, I don't have any shame Thor. I doubt I ever will. And now that I know you feel it too, I see no reason why we should deny ourselves. How long have you felt this way about me?"
"It doesn't matter. It's wrong!"
"I don't give a fuck if it's wrong," Loki walked to the bed in two long, fast strides and got in Thor's face. He whispered then, as he gazed into those blue, deep blue eyes. "Every time I touch myself, I think of you. Every time my toys slip inside I come with your name on my lips just as you did now. When did you realize, you wanted me? What did that first time feel like?" Loki's hand came up and carded through Thor's golden hair, making the older brother's breath hitch in his lungs.
"Last year, when you had your growth spurt. Your shoulders had broadened over the summer and you'd grown several inches in such a short amount of time. For the first time, I saw a man and not a boy, and I wanted you."
"We need to sell the house. We can't stay here after I graduate. I can go to any trade school in the country. You can pick up a job almost anywhere, and even if you can't, school won't take long. We need to move to a place where no one knows us. Start over. We can tell people that our last names are the same, because we are married."
"Loki, this is madness!" Thor said, still naked. Loki reached down and grasped his cock. Thor's hands fumbled around Loki's to try to pry it off, but Loki would not let go.
"No, it's incest. We want to fuck each other, and more. We can keep it a secret. No one needs to know. We can live a double life. We can get away with it."
"We would get caught. We would never be able to come back here."
"So? We're young. People move away and never return to their home towns all the time."
"What about social media? Our taxes? Our birth certificates?"
"We will figure that out. Take each problem as they arise," Loki said, and then kissed him. His hand worked Thor's now limp and spent dick. The flesh, oversensitive from too much stimulation too soon, sent out painful twinges begging Thor for a break. Thor lurched out of the kiss and leapt out of bed on the other side. Loki's eyes followed him, betrayal and heartache threatening to crest.
"I love you Loki. I have for a very long time, but you are vulnerable, and I would never forgive myself for taking advantage of you."
"You're NOT taking advantage of me! I'm begging you to fuck me! Love me! Be with me always. It can be just the two of us, forever! Don't you want that Thor? Don't you want to be inside of me? Every night we could make love. I want that. I want you. You could be my first. You could be my only, and I'd never want for another. You're everything I have ever wanted."
"We can't," he said. Tears streaked down Thor's rosy cheeks and it reminded Loki of his tumble so long ago. Tears sprang to Loki's eyes, as rage and rejection warred for supremacy. He ran from the room, down the hallway, and out the front door. He ran down the block, passing house after house. The full moon hung high in the sky, illuminating the sidewalk. His world was ending. Thor would surely abandon him now. He'd have to. Their mutual desire for one another had not brought them together, but had torn them apart.
His lungs and legs burned from exertion, and he slowed to a walk after about a half a mile. He reached the main road and followed it, not knowing where he was going. He couldn't go home. In a rented tux and not a penny left after his night at the prom, he had no plan. Making plans was pointless now. There were no cars on the road. No noise. Like the suburbs had been emptied of all living creatures.
He'd lost everything. He'd lost Thor. What was the point of living if no one loved you? Or worse, ran from you because society deemed them unacceptable. And Thor, looking so tormented, would surely leave the moment he could.
Loki reached the bridge on South Street. Beneath was a dried-out creek that flooded the canal every spring. There wasn't any water in it now, just a hard, dry bottom. Loki stepped up onto the thick cement railing and looked down on eternity. It was going to hurt like hell.
"Loki stop!" Thor's voice bellowed from behind him, jolting him.
"Thor?"
"What are you doing?" Thor asked, looking up at him. He felt guilty then, and ridiculous. Like a selfish asshole for even thinking of inflicting further pain on the man he loved. "Come home baby. I, I'll do anything to make you happy. Just come down."
Loki lept down, into his arms, and burst into tears. Thor held him tight, and when he tilted his head up to breath, he kissed him. He poured his soul into it, trying to convey all the love he felt without words. Loki jumped up and wrapped his legs around him, not giving a damn if they might be seen. When they finally stopped kissing to catch their breath, Loki laid his head on Thor's shoulder, and let him carry him home.