Pairings brought up/mentioned: Rome x Germania, Gerita, blink & you'll miss it Fruk

Warnings: None

-3.18-

"AHA! I KNEW IT!" Gilbert exclaims.

"Knew what?" Roderich isn't nearly as exuberant as his spirit, looking at the arctic wolf in confusion.

He leaps from his seat, hands waving about in the air, "Well, everything about this has almost perfectly paralleled the past, right?"

I sigh, "Yes, bruder. What's your point?"

"THIS MEANS THAT YOU AND FELI ARE GOING TO HOOK UP!"

And there goes the quiet.

"DAMN RIGHT I'M LETTING THAT STUPID POTATO ANYWHERE NEAR MY LITTLE BROTHER-"

"Lovi, calm down! Pllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-"

"NO! YOU DON'T CONTROL ME!"

"BLOODY HELL, YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME HERE!"

And there goes the peace.

"Ah, man, it's been so long since I was last in a brawl!" The old Roman stretches, bared muscles flexing none-too-subtly. "Don't you think?"

From our current bed, I shrug, "Eh, I guess. Not everyone's a bloodthirsty psychopath, you know."

He pouts, "Aldrich."

"Romulus," I cock an eyebrow.

With a sly grin, he flips off the light, slipping onto the mattress, a pair of arms winding themselves about my waist. He gently rests his head on the spot between my shoulder and chest with a light sigh. And then he starts sucking on my neck.

"What are you doing?" Comes my emotionally-masked response.

I feel his beam against my skin, "You know, I never did get off…"

I simply can't restrain the exasperated groan that comes out. "You know, having sex while in the process of visiting our grandchildren is even worse than doing so while falling from the afterlife."

"Aww, can't I at least get a handjob? Please?"

"No."

He pulls at my arm, pressing wet, needy kisses to my shoulder, "Please? For me?"

With a growl, I push him away, flopping onto my side. "You get horny at the worst of times and I'm done with it."

This, of course, doesn't persuade him, as he continues scooching himself closer so that we're spooning. I kick him in the shin.

"Ow! Aldrich, that hurt!" He springs back, finally giving me some space.

In the dark of the night, I cover my mouth to hold back a barking laugh.

The next day, I suppose the universe just hates me or something, because I end up practically dragging the world's biggest wolf downstairs for breakfast as he pathetically -adorably- whimpers his exhaustion. Aldrich never was a morning person.

"Oh, good morning," Arthur greets. "Did you sleep well?"

I smile, plopping my load onto a chair before taking the one next to it, "Oh, yeah, it was fine. You don't really sleep much in the afterlife!" I laugh jovially, looking around. "Hey, where are Feli and Lud?"

The rabbit scowls, "Late. Again. They're making quite the unfortunate habit out of this."

"Arthur, please," Francis pulls his spirit into his lap, "Would you take it easy for once? Who knows the pure travesty this must be causing for your blood pressure!"

He promptly receives a smack to the face, "Stupid frog! Cut that out!"

"Ve~!"

At that moment, two sets of footsteps come bounding down the stairs. We pause, listening as they dash through the hall, nearly slamming the double doors open. Lightly panting from the exertion, Feliciano enters the dining room, eagerly pulling Ludwig along behind him.

Noticing the rabbit's foul mood, the gray wolf gives him a sheepish look. "Sorry for our tardiness; Feliciano didn't want to get up."

At this, my grandson pouts, seating himself across from me. "But I was comfortable!"

Ludwig sighs.

At the other end of the table, Lovino can be heard coughing loudly and fakely into his hand, causing everyone to pause and shift their attention to him.

Feliciano raises an eyebrow, "Yes, fratello?"

"Um, er," His face goes red as he points to Aldrich, "Is that a… ?"

With a blink, I adjust myself to follow his gaze, eyes landing on his neck.

"Holy shit."

At the base of the dead wolf's throat, small but obvious, is a dark, purple welt.

"YES! FINALLY!" I leap from my seat, fists in the air, grin large and wide. I pump the air a few times, cheering my success.

"What just happened?" I hear Ludwig half-state, half-ask.

I turn to address the others, "Well, shortly after we died, we kind of took advantage of everything and fucked, right? During this, I tried to give Aldrich a hickey, but it turns out that once you die, wounds and even bruises heal ridiculously fast. But," I hold up a finger, "This rule of thumb apparently gets tossed out the window if we come back to visit. Do you know what this means?"

Arthur's face drops, "Does this mean you can die again?"

"I have no idea!" I proclaim, "I was just thinking that I can finally give Aldrich hickies, but that's a good point too. We should probably be wary about that, heheheh…"

Gilbert whistles, leaning over to get a good look, "Damn, knowing the old dog, he's going to be pretty upset when he wakes up."

"Wakes up?" I observe the wolf, his head lolling back slightly, eyes closed peacefully. I wait only but a few moments before a soft snore releases itself from his mouth. "Huh, I guess that explains why he hasn't yelled at me yet. That's pretty adorable."

"Yeah, pretty much," Antonio agrees through a mouthful of tomato.

Lovino shoots him a rather dirty look, "Really? You're eating with your mouth full?"

"Yup!"

My grandson plants his face onto the table with a groan, "I am literally surrounded by classless idiots."

"Oh, that reminds me," Roderich perks up, "Are we still going to England?"

Arthur blinks, "Going to England… ? Oh, yeah, that's right. We were going to England to further investigate the shadow wolf phenomena, but then you two showed up. Would you be alright with leaving right after you got here?"

I shrug, "Sure, I don't mind. I mean, Aldrich will probably freak out a bit, but whatever."

"Kesesesese~" Gilbert cackles, "I wonder how many spoons I can balance on his nose without him noticing!" He holds up his silver spoon, carefully placing it on top of the sleeping wolf's nose.

Roderich huffs, "I bet you can't even do five."

"You're on, Roddy!"

And thus begins the spoon balancing challenge to end all spoon balancing challenges.

Something cold and smooth on the tip of my nose, I twitch with an incoherent mumble.

"Shit, I think he's waking up!"

Blearily, I open an eye at the whispered shout. I grunt at the shapeless figures surrounding me, then go back to calm, blissful darkness. Then, I feel whatever's on my nose shift, as if something's being placed on top of it. I open both eyes this time, blinking to annihilate the blurriness from my vision.

"Morning, sweetie!" One of the strange forms says gently, white, somewhat-rectangular parts flashing and going out like a beacon.

I breathe a particularly deep sigh, causing the unknown object on my nose to slip to the floor, making musical chinks on the polished hardwood. I sit straight up and avert my gaze to the ground.

"... Were you balancing spoons on my nose?"

"HA!" Gilbert jumps up from his perch against the table, pointing at Roderich exuberantly, "'Can't even do five,' huh? Well guess who just got served! You did! THE AWESOME ME HAS PREVAILED!"

At my other side, Romulus covers his mouth. "I told them not to!"

I narrow my eyes warily, "Oh really?"

"Yup, you should be thanking me right about now. If I hadn't come along, they would have used dishes!"

"Hey, how come you're so sleepy anyways?" I shift to look at Roderich. "I mean, Romulus isn't nearly this tired, so what's up with that?"

I answer, "I am unused to sleeping."

"Allow me to elaborate!" The Roman cuts in, "You see, in the afterlife, no one actually needs sleep, since, well, we're dead. However, some of us, like me, choose to sleep for various reasons. I sleep because I like naps and cuddles! Aldrich thinks it's kind of a waste of time, so he stopped doing it," He leans in, pressing his cheek to mine, "The big teddy he is, he humors me by being my cuddle-buddy anyways! Isn't that just the cutest?"

"Personal space," I growl out, sharply elbowing him in the gut.

Romulus recoils, wrapping strong arms about his waist. "Ow, why do you always have to hit me there?!"

The Austrian continues, "Huh, so it's kind of like jet lag, but worse because you haven't slept in several centuries."

"Yeah, pretty much," I conclude. "Apparently, not only do Earth-bound ghosts keep bruises and such, but we also find out very quickly that sleep is amazing."

"Kesesesese~ Looks like I'll have the chance to beat my high score of seven nose-spoons!" My grandson exclaims.

I fix him with a glare, "If you even think of doing that again, I will personally scare you into your wolf form, grab you by the tail, and hang you upside down until you faint."

He freezes, "Shit."

"'Shit's right," Romulus gives a short, nervous laugh, "He never goes back on a threat."

I stand, "If you will excuse me, I am going to go find something productive to do."

As I walk off at a brisk pace, I hear the tapping of frantic footsteps trailing behind.

"Wah, Aldrich, wait up!"

"No thank you."

"Ve~ Luddy, come on!"

I pull the bulky wolf behind me, skipping off in the direction of the neighbor's fields. Today, I'm going to paint a vineyard landscape! As I search about for a nice place to set up my supplies, I hum a short tune, a cheerful grin on my face.

He pulls at my hand, "Feli, would you slow down? It's not like the sun's going down any sooner."

"But I want to make sure I have plenty of time to paint!" I pout, picking up speed.

Dashing through the rows upon rows of grapevines, I look this way and that, trying to find the perfect spot. So caught up am I in this, that I fail to see the rock right in front of me. With a panicked shout, my feet are pulled out from beneath me, and I fall.

"Sheisse!"

And yet, before I have the chance to land flat on my face, a firm hand tightens its grip on mine, holding me above ground. Shaking, I allow Ludwig to drag me to my feet once more, wrapping my arms around his middle.

"Wahh, Luddy, I almost fell and broke my nose!" I whine into his shirt.

He awkwardly pats my head. "I-it's alright, okay? Sure, you almost hurt yourself, but you didn't, and that's all that matters. Be careful next time."

I tilt my head upwards to smile at him, "Ve~ Good point!" My eyes flit about the area, "Actually, this looks like a pretty good painting spot, don't you think?"

"I guess so," The wolf shrugs. "I don't really know much about this kind of thing."

With one final nuzzle to his chest, I release him, digging through my messenger bag for the necessary items. Only but a few minutes later, I stand with a small canvas resting on one of the vertical planks meant to guide the vines. My wolf stands behind me, watching as I happily work away at the blank space, cloth slowly being covered with purples, greens, and yellows. My brush makes curving, gentle strokes of color for the multitude of vines, a smaller one spotting the green with tiny dots of violet. Afterwards, I go in with a darker shade of forest, squiggling the finer details of the vines.

I hear Ludwig shift at the sound of rustling twigs.

"Hm?" I gaze at him curiously. "Luddy, what was that?"

He continues to stare intensely at the vines, "It's probably just an animal, maybe Antonio wandering around the fields again."

"Okay!" I return to my painting.

As the sounds continue, he slowly moves in the direction of the creature, whatever it is. Undetected, I watch him investigate, slightly worried. He abruptly whips his head to the side, zeroing in on a particular stretch of grapes, body hunched and ready to pounce.

A stick breaks.

Without a second thought, Ludwig leaps over the vines, the shriek of a howl other than his own permeating the air.

And, of course, I freak out.

"WAHHHOHNOMAFIAGHOSTSPLEASEDON'TKILLME!"

A/N:

OH MY GOD THIS IS SO MUCH LATER THAN I WANTED TO POST THIS. So yeah, for literally the PAST WEEK+, I haven't been able to work on this in the slightest because I've had so much stuff going on! In summary, the end of the quarter was a total shitstorm.

Anyways, I've only gotten two chapters done throughout the hiatus, but I still wanted to post, because I felt really bad for leaving you guys hanging. Sorry! In the mean time, this chapter's revealed a couple of interesting things about afterlife mechanics in this AU:

1.) Ghosts can get hurt while in the mortal plane, and

2.) Ghosts need sleep in the world of the living, but can stay up as long as they'd like in the afterlife.

Also, what do you think the creature Ludwig's attacking at the end is? I'm kind of curious to see your train of thought on this one. =3

Responses to review(s):

maryranstadler1: Heheheh, yeah, trust me when I say that these dead grandpas are most definitely staying. Honestly, I came up with most of those titles on the spot while writing out my response, and I think my improve is the true hilarity of the situation. X3 Gilbert is the epitome of reckless impulsiveness that gets him in over his head, end of discussion.

Seele Esser Deustch: Alright, I'm going to trust you one hundred percent on this one. Thanks for the information! (Although, I believe I stated this earlier, but I'm kind of thinking of relations throughout history and not necessarily restricted to Europe.)

APDubtalia: Hahah, exactly! I headcanon that Rome's basically down for anything in the bedroom as long as his partner's okay with it. However, this being said, I imagine Germania's the kind of person to save himself for 'the one' that he'll spend the rest of his life with, and on top of that, I think he'd be kind of a sex purest in that he'd prefer regular, 'normal' procreation with no kinks involved. I also believe Rome would get horny at the absolute worst of times, as shown in this chapter. X3

So yeah, see you tomorrow for the second chapter of this really, really short upload spree!