They slept curled up together, Em's head on Magnus' chest, one hand resting on his shoulder with the emerald green sheets sheltering their bodies. Magnus had fallen asleep stroking her hair and his fingers were still tangled in her auburn locks when Em's phone chirped from the night stand, breaking his deep, dreamless sleep.
Em's eyes fluttered open as Magnus shifted beneath her, stretching his limbs like a sleepy cat. She reached for her cell, checked the name on the screen and groaned.
"It's Tess. I need to phone her - I should have done it last night. She'll be worried."
Magnus blinked, adjusting to the dim light in the bedroom. It was a stark, cold morning. He could hear the rain lashing the windows before he even looked.
"She knows you're here. If she was really worried she'd be at the door, not texting you. She probably just wants to know what happened." He ran a hand up Em's back, stroking away the fine strands of hair on the nape of her neck, revelling in the simple pleasure of waking up next to his girlfriend.
He frowned. At least he thought she was still his girlfriend. They hadn't exactly gotten around to talking about that last night. After they'd kissed, Em had all but collapsed against him and once he realised how exhausted she was he'd insisted they retire for the evening. It seemed she'd been missing as much sleep as he had over the past few months and anyway, he preferred to discuss important matters when he was totally sober.
He watched as Em sat up in bed. She pushed the sheets down and wrinkled her nose at her very creased sun dress. Neither of them had been awake enough to contemplate changing into pyjamas last night. It was a decision Magnus was starting to regret, his slim-fitting green pants and shirt were not his most comfortable outfit.
"Um, are my clothes..?" She looked at him shyly.
"Still in the dresser," he said. He was suddenly glad he hadn't had the heart to move any of Em's possessions while she was gone. Boxing everything up had seemed too final.
She walked across the room, retrieved a bundle of fabric and headed to the bathroom. "I'm just going to freshen up," she said over her shoulder. "Then maybe we can talk?"
He nodded as she closed the door and then stood up from the bed. He was already feeling a little nervous about discussing everything. Last night had been a crash course in emotions - shock, despair, anger, relief, a bit more shock, then finally, happiness. Today probably wouldn't be any better, but hopefully they could finally get everything out in the open and decide what to do next.
Magnus pulled off his uncomfortable clothes, slinging them into the hamper as he did, and picked out a pair of soft black slacks and an oversized moss green jumper. Once he'd changed he made his way into the kitchen and put on a large pot of coffee. Then, after a moment, snapped it away and conjured a large espresso and a decaf caramel macchiato from the café down the street.
A couple of minutes later Em emerged from the bedroom, brandishing her cell phone. "Tessa is fine. I told her I'm staying here today, she said to contact her if we need anything." She took the mug Magnus offered her with a small 'thanks' and gave it an appreciative sniff.
"Decaf?"
"Of course," he smiled and walked over to the sofa. Em followed him. She'd also dressed for comfort, swapping the dress for a pair of black leggings and a familiar dark red sweater that almost came down to her knees.
She noticed him looking at her outfit "Oh, I hope you don't mind-?"
"Why would I?" He smiled over the rim of his mug. "You always used to borrow my clothes. That sweater looks good on you."
"Thanks," she said, settling across from him in the armchair he'd occupied last night. "All my new stuff is in Idris and the clothes here are a little… tight."
There was an uncomfortable pause as Em trailed off. She shifted a little in the armchair and her free hand went to the edge of the sweater, unconsciously tugging the material looser. Magnus leant forward and placed his hand over hers, stilling her fingers.
"It's ok Em, you don't need to hide anything from me. We need to talk about this, all of it."
She took a deep breath then met his eyes, her gaze level. "Ok, what do you want to know?"
Magnus smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring manner and released her hand. Em's whole body seemed to relax as she leant back into the chair and took a sip of her drink.
"When did you find out you were pregnant?"
"At my Doctor's appointment, the night you had your party."
Magnus' eyes widened. That explained a lot. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Em snorted, her shoulders tense. "I was going to. But then I got home and you were making out with Jace Herondale. I guess it slipped my mind."
Magnus winced. He'd had that one coming.
"Em, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, we were drugged-"
"I know."
He looked up, surprised "Then why did you leave?"
She sighed and placed her mug on the table before throwing up her hands in agitation. "I was scared, Magnus. I didn't know what to do, I just found out that I was pregnant, which was supposed to be impossible. I had no idea what was going on or how you'd react and when I got home and saw you with Jace I just felt… betrayed." she sighed. "When I locked myself in the bedroom I got a moment to think and I realised what had happened, but it didn't really change anything. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't trust you anymore."
Magnus watched as Em's eyes filled with tears. She sniffed angrily and looked down at her hands. "I know how exciting your life used to be. And I was worried for a long time that I was holding you back in some way. Making you live like a mundane."
Magnus shook his head "Em, you weren't – you didn't say anything?"
She glanced up at him "When I saw you with Jace I realised, that was what you wanted. Freedom and fun. Your old life. I knew if you found out about… this," she gestured to her stomach, barely visible under the folds of red fabric, "you'd do the right thing. But I didn't want to force you into something you didn't want and I didn't want you to stay with me just because you thought you had to. I didn't want you to be miserable."
Magnus felt a stab of frustration. He stared at Em, "But you didn't give me a chance to decide for myself?"
She blinked and a single tear spilled down her cheek. He longed to reach out and wipe it away. "I'm sorry Magnus, I was scared. I didn't know what to do and I just panicked. I made Tessa and Catarina help me - I wasn't planning on hiding forever, I just needed time to work out what was happening and what I was supposed to do."
Magnus set down his mug on the coffee table, walked over to the armchair and knelt down beside it. Em looked up in surprise as he reached over and tenderly wiped the tear from her face.
"I understand Em. You were scared, you didn't think you could talk to me, so you ran." He reached over and took her hand, gently pulling her up from the chair, then walked over to the sofa and pulled her down to sit beside him. "Me kissing Jace, it wasn't anything to do with wanting freedom."
Em looked up at him, confused.
He paused, trying to find the right words. "I've had a lot of time to think about this too. In fact, I've had a lot of time. That's the problem. I've outlived almost everyone I care about and it kills me. I never wanted to hurt like that again Em, I promised myself I wouldn't. But then I met you." He took one of her hands in his and held it carefully, running his thumb across the top. "You have to understand, I don't regret any of this – of us, for a second. But I'm scared every day. Scared of losing you, scared of what it'll do to me. It would be easier to have a fun little fling and forget about it in the morning, but I don't want that. I want you, I chose you."
He looked up from their hands to Em's face. Her tears were flowing freely now. "I love you Emmeline Blackhallow. I want this – I want our family. Will you please move back home?"
"Yes," Em said, thickly. She wiped her cheeks with the edge of her sleeve and smiled at him. Magnus leant over and placed a chaste kiss on her damp cheek, before straightening up.
"There's only one thing left to decide then," He said, his voice serious.
"What's that?" Em questioned.
He smiled, "Where on earth are we going to put the nursery?"
A/N - Sorry, I know I promised fluff but it seemed weird to move on without having them discuss things properly. Fluff next chapter though, I pinky promise!
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