Finally, something wonderful happened. A time when his parents would be busy with work, but he and his sisters would be free. That glorious time in the school year known as Fall Break. Lori and Leni stopped by for Thanksgiving, but otherwise the Loud household was sparsely populated. Lola and Lana took advantage of the autumn weather to drag mom and dad to the park, while Lisa took the free time to cook up new inventions.
Ironically, though, the very sisters Lincoln sought were largely preoccupied throughout the week. Lynn was practicing for upcoming games most of the week. Lucy accompanied their parents and younger siblings to the park – for inspiration to write her poems, she claimed. Luna had a concert she was dying to go to. Luan finally caught a gig at the local comedy club as an opener and was stressing over it.
This all left Lincoln unnaturally alone with his confusing feelings and no one to talk to. Finally, he sucked it up and went to talk to them individually. He went outside, following the crack of ball on bat. Sure enough, there was Lynn practicing her batting. And pitching.
"Hey Lynn." Lincoln said, "Isn't baseball in the spring?"
"Yeah, but you can never be too prepared." She chuckled, "What's up, bro? Come to help me train?"
"Not really." He confessed, "Listen, about last week…"
"Ah." Lynn grinned, "That kind of training."
"No, I…"
"That kiss really did a number on you, right?" Lynn had dropped her bat and was circling Lincoln, feeling his shoulders, "You feel that adrenaline building? The raw power of instinct driving you on?"
Much quieter, as she leaned in close to his ear,
"You want to explore that impulse, don't you Linc?"
"I mostly just wanted to talk."
"Oh." Lynn sounded disappointed, "Well, it's not as active as I'd like, but whatever helps you cope. So what's on your mind?"
"You don't find it a little weird that the five of us are… involved?" the younger brother asked, trying to phrase the question properly.
"Of course it's odd." Lynn laughed, "If it wasn't odd, every family would have something like this going on. Doi."
"I'm serious, Lynn." Lincoln sighed, "Four sisters sharing one brother?"
"To be fair, I'm only sharing you for now." Lynn picked up a basketball, "I intend to win this thing."
"So it's all just a game?" Lincoln couldn't keep the sadness from touching his voice.
"Linc," Lynn was looking at him, face softened, "I love you. Not just as a brother, but as a dude. No other guy in this world makes me feel like you do. Everything is a contest to me – everything's a game – and you're the ultimate prize."
"Wow." The boy blinked, "That… that means a lot coming from you."
"Yeah, well… don't expect that mush often." Lynn snorted, turning back to her hoops to hide the blush on her face, "You're more than just a trophy to me, Linc. I care about you. Like, a lot."
"I care about you too, Lynn." Lincoln said, smiling.
"More than the others?" she asked, a little too hopeful.
"I'm not sure…" the boy confessed, "I can't choose between you guys. It's not fair."
"You'll come around." Lynn smirked, picking up her ball and tossing it toward Lincoln, "Sooner or later, I'll win you over."
Lincoln smiled, unsure of what to say. He left his sister to her practice, his thoughts now laden with the reality of the choices he was faced with. Completely ignoring the fact they were all related, he knew he could only really choose one – if any. Even if society and family permitted such a sacrilegious union, polygamy would be pushing too far. Despite her selfish motivations, Lynn was right; in the end, only one girl could lay claim to Lincoln.
For the longest time he had been so sure it would be Ronnie Anne. Now he was forced to decide between four sisters, all of whom he loved desperately; none of which he loved as passionately as they appeared to love him. He was thirteen. The only romantic thoughts he had had all revolved around a girl who simply did not love him anymore. In truth, he feared a relationship with any of his sisters; if things went south like with Ronnie Anne, how badly would it damage their family?
Without realizing it, Lincoln had wandered back into the house where Luan and Luna were arguing. Unsurprisingly, Luna had and been playing her guitar exceptionally loud – something she always did in the week building up to a concert. Luan, meanwhile, was on the verge of an anxiety attack from her upcoming performance. She wanted quiet to concentrate on her jokes.
Their argument petered out when Lincoln arrived, and both faces flushed in embarrassment.
"Are you girls alright?" Lincoln asked.
"Yeah, Linc." Luan said.
"We're just having some…" Luna searched for an appropriate phrase, "…creative differences."
"They're some pretty noisy differences." Lincoln smirked.
"More like loud differences." Luan furrowed her brow, "I've already used that joke. I need better material."
"Luan, your material is great." Lincoln said.
"I've been trying to tell her that, but she doesn't believe me." Luna rolled her eyes, "There's no convincing her, and it's cutting into my vibe."
"Your 'vibe' is messing with my muse!" Luan shot back, "How can I make art when I can't even think?"
"It's never stopped you before." Luna said, "Some of your best jokes have been written to my jamming!"
Lincoln watched his older sisters attack each other. He couldn't stand seeing his sisters fight, so he spoke up.
"You two have lived together for as long as I can remember!" he interjected, "Surely you two have worked together, either helping each other with songs and jokes, or just being there for the other, right?"
Luna and Luan looked at each other, faces flushed in shame.
"I know you're nervous, Luan, but you have nothing to be worried about." Lincoln said, holding his sister's hand, "You've got this in the bag! They wouldn't have hired you for the gig if they didn't think you were funny."
"Y-yeah." Luan's eyes were fixated on their hands held together, "That's true. They wouldn't hire me otherwise."
"And Luna, you're a really talented musician. I don't doubt you've inspired Luan often, but…" Lincoln shrugged, "she's nervous. I think she needs your support, right now, more than your music."
"I guess my music can get a little too loud." Luna muttered, embarrassed, "Sorry Luan. I know your nerves must be a bloody mess right now."
"It's ok." Luan sighed, "I'm overthinking it. Still, I'd appreciate it if you'd play something calmer."
"You want me to play?" Luna looked surprised.
"Your music is really calming, sometimes." Luan confessed, "When it's not shaking the walls."
"Thanks, Linc." Luna smiled, sheepishly, "It's weird taking advice from our younger brother, but you're pretty mature, man."
"I guess you could say he wears the pants in the family." Luan smirked. Both Luna and Lincoln couldn't resist snickering at that remark. "I've still got it."
"Was there anything you wanted help with, bro?" Luna asked, "You look troubled."
"Huh?" Lincoln blinked, "Oh, nothing really."
"Come on, we're your sisters." Luan offered, then quieter, "And then some."
Lincoln blushed.
"Well, I'm just not sure how to feel about all this." He confessed, "I'm going to have to choose one of you, eventually."
"No you won't." Luna said, but the frown betrayed the lie, "We can share you."
"No, you can't." Lincoln shook his head, ruefully, "I don't want a harem; I can't handle that."
"That reminds me of a joke." Luan tried to make light of the situation, "What's the problem with dating twenty-nine-year-olds?"
"Luan, I'm serious." Lincoln frowned, but curiosity got the better of him, "What?"
"There's twenty of them!" Luan beamed. Luna cracked up and Lincoln struggled to keep a straight face.
"Ok, that was pretty good." Lincoln confessed, "But seriously, I can't date all of you. I can't think of anybody that could handle that many relationships at once! Let alone a thirteen-year-old."
"Yeah, I guess that is pretty heavy stuff to put on a kid your age." Luna admitted.
"Then which of us gets him?" Luan asked the million-dollar question.
The two older sisters glared, challengingly at each other mere moments after having reconciled.
"I have an idea." A new voice added, sending all three siblings into shock.
"Lucy!" Lincoln exclaimed, "I thought you were out with mom and dad!"
"We're back, now." Lucy explained, "By the way, you might want to keep this kind of conversation down. The walls have ears."
"They aren't the only ones." Luna muttered.
"I knew it!" Lynn slid into the room, glaring at her younger roommate, "I knew you were going to try and sneak some alone time with Lincoln, you… sneak."
"Mom and dad are in the house?" Lincoln whispered.
"Don't worry; they're downstairs." Lucy shrugged.
"So what was your plan, Lucy?" Luan asked.
"We each date Lincoln." The goth explained, "One date each, and Lincoln decides who to go with."
"Oh yeah, no pressure." Lincoln scoffed.
"Don't worry, Linc." Lynn said, shifting her gaze between her older and younger siblings, "We'll be civil about it. None of us would blame you."
"I'm down for whatever, man." Luna agreed, "It'd break my heart, but I wouldn't hold it against you."
"Agreed." Luan said, simply, also eyeing her sisters in what was becoming a standoff.
"There will be no bad blood between us, Lincoln." Lucy agreed.
Lincoln was partially relieved that there would be no ill will against him for choosing one sister. Seeing his sisters glaring challenges at one another, though, he became worried about any bad blood brewing between them. Just as Lynn's sports team analogy had predicted, there were fissures already blooming.
Lincoln gulped at the ill omen.