Chapter 4

I huffed and panted.

It was so tiring.

"OI YOH! Don't think about stopping! CONTINUE!" I hear Horo Horo yelled behind me.

I sighed, still holding onto my sword as I looked in front of me. Amidamaru was giving me the concerned look as I could only smile weakly.

I needed to continue to practice to become stronger. Maybe it's also another way to train my eyes to see Anna.

Anna.

Anna.

Anna.

Her name just kept replaying in my mind. "OI!" I jerked as I shouted, "YES!" without putting much thought of what I just said.

I have to do this.

I could tell Anna's frustrated.

I mean, not like I could see her but… with her obviously throwing so many things against the wall of my room, I could tell she's frustrated. She was practicing making a mess in the room.

She was screaming and yelling with all her might, throwing my CDs and some of the stuff we both shared in my room.

I didn't really know what to do. I could only just stand outside my door, staring at everything that was thrown at every direction.

Hell, I couldn't even hold her. I don't even know where the hell her spirit position is right now.

Next thing I heard was her cries.

I haven't heard her cry since… I don't know when. It's been years.

After the room seemed to calm down, I tried to follow the direction of her sobbing. She was never like this. Not even in front of me when she was alive.

"Anna."

"Go away."

She was trying to be strong again as I heard her sniffing. This was my Anna.

For a moment, I thought I saw her back. It was seemingly blinking for a moment before it faded away. I took the chance to quickly glance at her. But I failed to see her face.

I saw an empty space again.

I place my hand on my floor, wishing I could hold her right now but I wasn't sure till I tried. "You idiot. You cannot hold me. You know that." She berated me despite being so upset. I could only chuckle.

"Idiot. You know I love you, right."

She shut up after hearing those words from me and I heard nothing when I felt something cold on my hand. After a minute, that feeling slipped away and I didn't expect to hear the next thing.

"Only I can touch and hold you."

I smiled. Yeah, only she could.

Anna was never sweet or mushy or anything like me but I knew we were about the same when I met her.

We both had no friends since our childhood days. We both had a lot in common but our personalities just differed somewhat.

I liked being cheerful and trying to make new spirit friends while she preferred to keep to herself and not talk to anyone, hiding in her room.

But I never expected myself to really love her like I would now.

I continued training with the hope that I had seen yesterday. I had seen a second of her back. I couldn't remember what I saw but I remembered she was wearing her black dress.

Just like always.

"Stop plastering that smile on your face and focus BAKA!"

Horo Horo scolded again as I laughed and tried to focus. I was happy that I saw that scene but I guess I shouldn't be happy too soon.

Hours passed as I became exhausted, lying on the floor as I finally reached my room. I was too lazy to even set out my futon. I nearly fell asleep when I was awakened with a slap of a pillow on my face.

"Yoh, you can't sleep like that you idiot."

"I'm tired, Anna."

"No excuse."

I sighed.

I went to shower, nearly sleeping again when I heard a bang on the door. She never gave me a moment…

I dried up before sleeping but the aftermath of showering kind of got me wide awake so I lay on my futon a while.

"Thought you were really tired?"

I was never surprised by her sudden speech anymore. I just imagine like she was always there with me. "Yeah… But you made me shower and all. I'm pretty much awake now." I chuckled, staring at empty space again.

"Close your eyes."

"Nah, I wanna try seeing you again."

"Why?"

I smiled as I looked up at the ceiling. "I caught a glimpse of you yesterday. Your backview." I paused as I sighed. "You're still wearing that black dress."

I heard nothing from her but only to feel the coldness beside me. "You finally saw…?"

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want to keep my hopes up, Anna. I was worried. What if it was just my hallucination? I wanted to train more to ensure I really saw you." I looked beside me, with that small hope inside me that I would see her face but still no.

I feel her against my neck as I smiled.

"I love you, Anna."

Both darkness and silence greeted me as I closed my eyes, awaiting for the next day filled with hope in my heart.