A/N: I had a very busy day, so I'm posting this up a lot later than I thought I would. Sorry. I tried to get myself to scrap this whole bit, but I couldn't get myself to do it. Don't hate me for giving in to the fluffiness! (I hope to get this memories themes back onto the darker spectrum soon. Not beta'd

Thanks: I hope to get those up tomorrow sometime...(or is that today, later?)

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Echoes
by Em

"My home is not a place, it is people."
- Lois McMaster Bujold, "Barrayar"

Birth
(06: Anniversary)

Raven was a knowledge hound. There was very little that didn't capture her curiosity. Of course, people didn't know that. They knew she liked to read, but they didn't know that she liked to read because it was the easiest way for her to gather information. Her books were varied in themes and weren't strictly fiction. And despite whatever the tabloids might publicize, her sole literary interests were not Poe and dusty old magic books.

Pretty much anything could capture her interest, at least once. She spent one whole afternoon watching The Cooking Channel and thought that she had at least some grasp of what might have gone wrong that day so long ago when she attempted pancakes. Not that she suddenly found a latent desire to become the next Emeril Legasi, but there was so much information to be found in cooking shows that sometimes, she didn't realize how much time had passed while she was watching them. She didn't learn just about how to cook food, but she learned about how to appreciate food as well. Things that perhaps others who watched the shows wouldn't pick up on. She was drawn to the colors and the attitudes of these television chefs, as well.

But that was only one of her interests.

She watched television for much the same reason as she read books, although until the introduction of satellite cable to her life, she had found that public television was woefully lacking in the knowledge department. She hated reality shows, for example, although she often found herself enthralled by game shows. Jeopardy might be an obvious choice for her, but Family Feud was surprisingly full of tidbits of knowledge. (Who knew so many people thought that purple was a relaxing color?) Wheel of Fortune helped her develop her earth vocabulary and slang and The Price Is Right taught her much about American Consumerism. She didn't really understand gameshows like The Dating Game or The Newlywed Game (why would anyone want to put themselves out like that?) and shows like American Idol baffled her entirely. Strangely enough, television shows such as those found on the 'all news' channels annoyed her. She didn't need for secluded, sheltered, upper-class men and women to pretend to tell her what was going on in the world and/ or what she should think about it. But overall, she learned about as much from television as she did from reading, albeit about different topics.

She also learned from watching her friends. This was a most bountiful fount of knowledge for her. They didn't often know she watched them because she was learning from them, even from Starfire who seemed so often to be searching them out for information herself. At one point, Robin had noticed, but that wasn't surprising, because Robin noticed everything. He noticed her watching him train and he taught her hand to hand self defense. She didn't really need it, but in the end, it had come in handy more than once and as knowledge went, it was the useful sort and she welcomed it.

And she learned from pretty much anything. Television, movies, people watching...anything and everything served some education purpose for Raven's knowledge thirsty mind. But the greatest source of information for her were her friends. She learned something (usually more than one thing) from each of them, whether or not they knew it. And only some of the things were practical things...most of them were existential to say the least.

Cyborg taught her mechanics and how to drive. He also taught her that being silly and being mature weren't necessarily mutually exclusive. He taught her acceptance and he was the first one to teach her love. Not the passionate kind of love that one reads about in the romance novels, but the kind of love that is caring and warm and clean of physical attraction, but full of comfort. The love that comes from familial bonds, the kind of love that nothing can ever change. Cyborg was the first person to love her for who she was, not despite it. He was the first person to teach her what family was.

Beast Boy taught her how to laugh. He didn't know it, not really. He thought she never laughed at his jokes, and the truth was, she didn't really laugh at his jokes, she laughed at the joy he felt and found in everything. She laughed at his incessant, tireless ability to find the bright side of any situation. Even though it was only on the inside, she laughed. At first, it was just a way of anticipating the way he was going to react to any given set back, but eventually, she found herself recognizing the good of situations herself, the positive, instead of drowning in the bad. Beast Boy taught her that too.

Starfire taught her friendship...sisterhood, even. Raven had never felt as if she were like anyone else until Starfire had taught her how alike they were. It wasn't as simple as 'girl power' or whatever it was society called that bond between females. It was deeper than that. It was finally feeling as if at least one other person in several worlds got her, just because. Starfire didn't have to understand all the particulars about what was going on with her, but she understood that she was going through particulars and that was enough. It went beyond shopping or meditation or Star's gossiping...it was truly a type of bond, an understanding that went beyond the actual facts of any given situation and was linked to a kind of acceptance like Cyborg's only...more so.

And, despite her lack of physical manifestation of the fact, Starfire had taught her how to be a girl. Sure, she didn't take to wearing makeup or fooling with hair accessories or -- Azar forbid-- pink, but she had never really thought of being a girl until she met Starfire. She had simply been Raven, and all the explicatory adjectives attributed to her had always been tied to what she was meant to do and her parentage, never her sex. She felt more feminine because of Starfire, even if she didn't always show it, but Starfire taught her what it felt like so she could recognize it inside her. She was a girl and would soon be a woman, and Starfire, without even knowing it, had taught her how to be one.

Robin had taught her self-defense. The people of Azarath were a peaceful people...more, they were Pacifists and didn't believe in violence at all. When she came to Earth, she knew so little about warfare...she had read of it, had the capacity for strategy and the physical agility for actual fighting techniques, but it had never occurred to her to learn them. Robin taught her how to fight, how to defend herself, how to think and anticipate her opponents, and how to protect others. How not to rely on her powers but on her abilities as part human. More importantly though, he taught her about hope. Faith. Trust. Belief. All these things she had never even thought to experience she found in his treatment of her. Robin taught her that although being self reliant was good, not needing to be was better. He had taught her that she could be strong and still lean on her friends. Robin respected her, her intelligence, her opinion, her thoughts...he respected her and he taught her that she could be respected, but because he taught her what it was like to be respected, he taught her how to respect others, too. Others, and maybe, even herself. Raven respected Robin above even her tutors on Azarath. Her respect for Robin was shadowed only by the unending respect she had for Azar herself. In a very real way, Robin had taught her how to be human.

Trigon had conceived her, given her part of himself and her powers, the monks and priestesses of Azarath had taught her how to control herself and how to exist, but the Titans had taught her how to live..how to be. She had come from her mother's womb, but it wasn't until nearly 14 years after that bloody, violent emergence that she was actually born.

The Titans had given birth to her.

And they didn't even know it.

What was worse, she didn't know how to let them know it. She tried to do more things with them, but whenever she acted too different from the way she had always acted, they became suspicious and worried and that wasn't what she wanted.

So, it took quite a bit of planning for her to figure out how to show them how much she cared and how thankful she was. But eventually, she did and in her quiet, efficient way, she planned and prepared it all so that that crisp fall day, a week after the Harvest Moon, when the Titans entered the common room in the morning, it was to find Raven waiting.

"Raven?" Robin asked first, looking around at the breakfast set out on the tables and the various gift wrapped packages on the tables.

Raven was blushing, she knew it, but she wouldn't back off. "I wish..." she started, having to stop and force herself to look up into their surprised and waiting faces, "I wish to celebrate the day of my birth with you."

Beast Boy, mid way to slinking onto the sofa, fell out of it and onto his ass, "Dude!" he exclaimed, rubbing at his tail bone, "Wasn't your birthday a couple months ago?" he asked.

She smiled at him and that made him blink a few times, "Yes," she confirmed, "But..." she, normally with such eloquence and ability with words, was at a loss as to how to explain herself, even if she had suspected they would ask and had prepared herself for the eventuality. "On this day," she forced herself to continue, "Five years ago, I met all of you," she told them, "And on that day," she continued, her pace awkward and uncertain, "I began to live..." she finished and found she was looking at her hands again so she forced her head up and resisted the urge to lift the hood of her cloak, "And now that I can share it with you..." she continued, "I wish to celebrate the anniversary of my true birth..." she brought out a little flag that declared 'Happy 5th Birthday' in bright, sparkly letters and she waved it sheepishly, "Will you celebrate with me?" she asked.

"DUDE!" Beast Boy broke the silence.

"Glorious!" Starfire exclaimed joyously, flying straight at Raven and nearly knocking her over in her impulsive hug.

"Group hug, y'all!" Cyborg exclaimed, coming forward and lifting both Starfire and Raven into his arms in a massive bear hug, "I better get started on that cake!" he said placing them back on the ground.

Starfire giggled, letting Raven go, "I shall begin work on the crown of meat immediately!" she flew off with one more grin at her friend to which Raven just barely winced, but managed to hold the relaxed look of contentment on her face.

"Duuuude!" Beast Boy whined, going after her. "What will I do?" he asked no one in particular.

"You wanna pose for another piñata?" Cyborg asked hopefully.

Beast Boy scoffed, "No," he said succinctly.

Cyborg paused, "You wanna be the piñata?" he asked. Beast Boy did his best to glare at him and Cyborg laughed it off, clapping him on the back. "Just kidding...come on, help me with the cake."

"That I can do," Beast Boy said, following him.

"I think I've still got the old piñata mold somewhere..." Cyborg trailed off as he walked away.

Beast Boy groaned as he walked into the kitchen.

Left alone with Robin watching her, Raven's hand holding the flag lowered as did her eyes. "I'm not good at expressing myself...not when it counts," she said softly, "But I can say thank you..." she looked up and met his eyes, "And hope you understand what I mean by it."

He kept her eyes for what seemed like endless moments until slowly, his lips curved into a soft, understanding smile. "Don't I always?" he asked.

She hadn't ever learned to smile. Not the real smile that came from deep inside and lit up your eyes, the kind of smile she had seen make Starfire so blindingly beautiful and Cyborg so flatteringly happy and Beast Boy so boyishly charming and Robin so surprisingly young. But suddenly, she was doing it.

She nodded, briskly, trying to hide her face so that he couldn't see the blush crawling on her cheeks, "You do." She looked at the breakfast she had put on the table and realized that the others had gone off so quickly to do their own preparations for the celebration they had ignored the food. She frowned.

"Hey!" Robin called into the kitchen, walking to stand next to her, "Why don't we have breakfast before we destroy the kitchen in preparations?" he asked when he saw he had their attention.

"Oh yeah!" Cyborg exclaimed, coming out of the kitchen and sitting in front of the plate that was obviously for him if the overwhelming quantities of meat products was any indication. "Mmm-mmm, Rae! This is what I'm talking about!"

Beast Boy made a face that brightened when he saw the tofu sausage and bacon waiting on his plate, "At least she didn't try to make pancakes again!" he laughed and attacked the food.

Which was a bit of a mistake since Cyborg's smack upside his head made him dive face first into his plate and the choking noises really interrupted the good humor of the moment.

Beast Boy emerged from his plate of food with a very angry look on his face. Before he could fly at Cyborg however, Raven extended a napkin in his line of sight and the reminder that he had tofu egg all over his face brought him back to the present and away from revenge.

"Thanks," he muttered.

"There's more tofu egg in the pan on the stove."

Beast Boy wiped at his face and grinned at her.

When everyone had finally settled into their seats, Robin raised his glass of orange juice, "To the birthday girl," he motioned to Raven, he paused while the rest of them raised their own glasses, "May all her days be blessed with as much joy as she brings into our lives just by knowing her."

"Here here!" Cyborg exclaimed, chorused by the others as they all clinked glasses in the middle of the room.

Raven waited until they had all taken sips of their juice, before raising her own glass, "And to my family," she said, her voice softer than it normally was, yet still carrying. She met each of their eyes, "And all they have taught me."

Her family clinked glasses with her and with that, the anniversary festivities really began.

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Spoiler: Next theme is "I Promise I'll Be Back..."