This is a weird dream. There's a man crouched in a dog cage. I don't think I've had a dream like this before. Usually my dog dreams include me running from a rabid dog or trying to get a dog off my leg. My leg is not for humping good sir.
"Seriously, my legs are going numb. Sumire, let me out, un."
Wait, how does he know my name? He must have heard it when the other workers said it aloud, but then that would mean he understood me… this is just a dream though! It doesn't matter if he knows my name. I just have to walk out into the hall and when I come back things will be different.
She spun around quickly and exited into the hall, much to the protest of the caged blonde. She waited a few moments then returned, hoping that the room would change.
"Okay," she was speaking to herself. "This is odd, is this happening?"
"Sumire."
"How did you get in there?" she nearly shouted.
"Those guys put me in here, yesterday."
"…no they put a golden retriever in that cage? What did you do with the golden retriever?"
"I…" he sighed in frustration, "I am…"
He glared at the floor and he gripped the wiring of the cage.
"I am that… dog, un."
"No, y-you're clearly human!" she pointed an accusing finger at him.
"I know it doesn't make sense. Yesterday I woke up as a dog, today I woke up a human. Now please, let me out of this damn cage, un."
I guess it makes sense to let him out… He must be really uncomfortable… but… what if he tries to attack me? I should just call the police. So I can get started with my day and groom the other dogs and go… go back to normal.
The blonde was staring at her, wondering why she was taking so long to let him out but now he knew. She doesn't remember me, does she? Does that mean she doesn't remember any of us? That'll make this tough.
"Sumire. I'm not going to hurt you. I know it sounds wild but I am that golden retriever, okay? Who in their right mind would lock themselves inside a dog cage?"
Sumire felt it strange that she believed him. His eyes were pleading to be released. The other dogs were strangely silent as well, as though they were gauging her. Why do I want to trust him? There was a sense within her, one of familiarity. She had felt it when she was alone with all them. She chalked it up to her comfort around animals, such innocent creatures only with a desire for love and attention. Yet, there was something more here with these odd dogs.
"I… I'm going to call the police." She said despite the odd feeling filling her small body.
"No! Just let me out and I'll leave, un!"
All at once the silence was filled with loud, sharp barking. The Chihuahua yipped and clawed at the wire cage. The larger dogs let out low, heavy barks. The blonde man glared at the them as though he understood what they were saying.
"Whoa quiet down!" she called.
They fell silently, now are staring at her again. She was taken aback by this. Well trained dogs did listen when they were told to quiet down, but the silence was too quick to have been normal. There is something up here. Am I on some sort of prank show?
"Just let me out and we can talk about this."
"…there's…" she looked around nervously at all the dogs. "There's nothing to talk about. I need to call the police."
"Sumire, please! This is going to sound really wild, but…" he gripped the cage tighter. "You know all of us, you've met all of us before, we worked together, at the Akatsuki Concert Hall."
"…what are you talking about?"
"Your name is Koizumi Sumire. You're twenty-six years old. Five foot two. Allergic to peanuts. You love sweets and your favorites are chocolate truffles dusted with cocoa powder and hot chocolate with whipped cream."
Her eyes were wide. Stalker. He's a stalker.
"You prefer Ramen over Soba. When you were in high school you tripped, and ripped your favorite pants, so you had to wear your jacket around your waist, un."
"You…"
"You told me all of this when we were working together, un."
"No. No. You're a freak stalker." She backed up.
"Sumire, I'm not going to hurt you."
She turned back around and headed back to the workroom to find her cellphone.
X
Smooth, Deidara-chan.
The blonde glared at the greyhound who was poised on his hip.
"Hey, what the hell would you have said, un?"
I wouldn't start listing off her whole life. Of course, she'd think you're a stalker.
He strained his neck to look at the dachshund.
"Well, what should I say then? How about some help, instead of yelling at me?"
You must be calm and try to make her trust you. Otherwise this situation will become far more complicated that we'd like it to be.
"Like I said, what the hell should I say?" he retorted to the Doberman.
A sudden sharp pain appeared in his abdomen and he winced. His fingers found their way to his midriff, cursing as he touched his skin.
What's wrong?
"I don't know."
They all watched in shock as his body began to contort.
X
Sumire peeked through the screen door while holding the phone up to her ear. Her eyes went wide and she reentered the back area. Where the man had been uncomfortably crouched, she saw a crop of dirty fur and the sleek body of a dog. She approached it slowly.
"What?" she met its stunning blue eyes.
It made a low whining sound as though it were in pain. Her instincts kicked in. She lowered the phone and stuffed into her pocket.
"Are you okay?"
I was just hallucinating. Imaginations can run wild. It's no big deal. It happens. It's just the golden retriever. It's in pain, I should help it.
It whined again and curled up. Sumire started to undo the latch to the cage.
But what if it isn't a golden retriever? What if he's some sort of shapeshifter and he just wants me to let him out of the cage? No, Sumire. That's stupid. You were just having a weird moment and now everything is back to normal just like you wanted. He's just a dog.
She lifted the latch and pulled it open. The dog slowly moved forward, his limbs shaking as he did so.
"Poor thing." She walked to the closet to find a brush.
When she turned around she screamed. The man was standing, though partially hunched over, his hand braced against the steel table in the middle of the room.
"Please, wait…" he winced. "I'm not doing this, un."
She was frozen in place in shock and fear.
"Even if I wanted to hurt you," he groaned, still clutching his abdomen. "I wouldn't be able to. I'm in too much damn pain."
"D-don't move."
"Couldn't if I wanted to."
He dropped to his knees. She jumped and stepped back. Any small movement he made had her on edge. Her trembling hand was reaching into her pocket and searching for her phone.
"And I don't!" he stated with what strength he could muster.
Call the police. Go to the door. Run.
"Please help."
"Help? You want me to help you?"
"Can you… can you at least get me something to wear, un?"
"…wear…what?"
He rose slowly and she hurriedly plucked the phone from her pocket. It slipped from her fingers and clattered to the floor, dangerously close to the man standing a few feet away. Oh no. Oh no. Their eyes met and her face took on a pink tint. He's really handsome. Her gaze passed over him for a moment. And he's naked.
"T-There are clothes in the breakroom…"
He could. He could grab a hold of me and… I just have to get my phone when he's not looking or just run and find someone on the street or…
"Would you get them for me, un? I can't really move much."
He's trying to trick me. He's going to hurt me. Go to the door and run for it.
"What do I have to do to make you trust me?"
"…k-kick my phone back to me."
He reached a bare foot out and gently slid the phone across the floor. She picked it up, clutching it to her chest in fear.
"If I was going to hurt you, would I have done that?"
I can't trust him. It's a naked man that can turn into a dog. It hurts him to do so though…
She started to dial.
"Sumire. At least get me some clothes before you call the police. I'll be sitting right here when you get back. Okay?"
A few of the dogs growled.
"Well she doesn't trust me? What the hell do you want me to do, un?" he hissed at the cages.
The tension and anxiety in her body was at a dangerous level. Cold shiver after cold shiver rushed down her spine. Her clammy hands gripping her device tight enough to crack it. Her knees were buckling. Tears started to fall down her face. Before she passed out she saw his expression change from pain to deep worry. Her small body collapsed to the floor. He called out her name and dashed to her side, catching her head with his hand before it hit the linoleum floor. He gritted his teeth as another searing ache enveloped his middle. In almost a push-up position, he set her head down softly, then let himself fall to the floor.
Get up idiot.
"Shut up."
He moved to his side.
Deidara. Take her phone. If you let her keep it, she'll call the police.
"She's going to be freaked out anyway, why does it matter?"
Take her phone.
"Sorry, Sumire." He said as he pried it from her fingers.
He moved to his knees. Is it really Sumire if she doesn't remember me? She looks just like our Sumire, but if she's a completely different girl, she'll never trust us. It took our Sumire eternity to get comfortable with us… He was on his feet again, the pain present but subsiding. Well, she has the same anxiety issues as our Sumire.
Yo, stop walking around with your junk out.
He knit his brows in annoyance and glanced around the room.
"Look who's talking, un."
We're dogs. It's allowed.
"Whatever."
X
Sumire's eyelids fluttered. It was a dream, just a dream. What a dream? A shapeshifting human-dog-person. Her vision cleared and she realized where she was. Whoa, what?
"You're awake."
She sat up suddenly.
"Are you okay?"
She stared up at the naked man in horror.
"Wait, don't panic or you'll pass out again, un." He knelt.
She scrambled away from him until her back hit the wall.
"Why are you doing this?"
"If I wanted to do something to you, I would have done it when you passed out."
He watched her line of sight drift downward and he placed his hands over his crotch. Her face flushed and she looked away again.
"If you're feeling okay, can you just get me something to wear? I'll stay right here, sitting, like I said. I won't do anything, un."
"…"
"And when I have something on we can just… talk."
Why didn't he do anything when I passed out? Why doesn't he just leave? He must want to do something to me… my phone. She searched with her eyes but noticed it was missing. Did he take it? Is it still in the breakroom? This is the time to run.
"Please."
His expression was pleading.
"…you'll stay right here."
"Yes."
My phone might be in the breakroom? I thought I grabbed it though.
"I'll be back."
She rushed to said room on her wobbling legs. She couldn't find it in her locker or her purse. I can use the front desk phone, I just have to get there without him noticing.
In case she was unsuccessful she searched for some article of clothing. Much to her luck she found a few linen aprons that had recently been washed.
Her head popped into the hallway from the employee breakroom door. He said he would stay in there and he is… what is up with this guy? If he had some nefarious plot to hurt me… wouldn't he be more cautious? Maybe he isn't trying to hurt me?
Sumire stop thinking nonsense and go to the phone. Call the damn police.
She tiptoed to the door that lead to the foyer. He… he did ask to not be naked when the police get here…
Stop it. What are you thinking?
I'm thinking that… I should give him the apron first.
You are a moron, Sumire. Call. The. Police.
Despite the protestations of her own mind she approached the door leading to the backroom. She poked her arm in to hold out the aprons.
"I'm sorry, that's all I could find."
"This'll do."
She twiddled her fingers until he called to her that he had finished. Her foot slid in a motion to back away, but his silence enticed her to open the door.
Sumire, you moron, repeated across her consciousness. It became a steady mantra as she entered. Back inside the blonde man seemed to be having a staring contest with the Doberman.
"Um…"
He looked at her. Around his waist, he had tied the apron's, but low enough that she could see the defining lines in his abdomen. She avoided staring at him.
"W-what's your name?"
"Deidara… you really don't remember me, do you?"
"You mean from yesterday? When you were trying to bite everyone?" What am I evening saying? Do I actually believe him? I should be calling the police.
"No, not that. Me, Deidara. We've met before."
"I think I would remember a golden retriever with the power to change into a human."
"That's not it! I am human, I just got turned into a dog, un."
"…How?"
He opened his mouth to speak but immediately stopped. He looked around at all the dogs still in cages.
"I don't remember. Do you guys?"
Oh no, he's out of his mind.
Suddenly many of the dogs were shaking their heads, the greyhound was barking loudly.
"No one remembers how it happened, un."
"No… one… you mean…"
"Oh right, all the dogs you brought in. They're human, too."
"Huh." Yup, he's out of his mind. Sumire you idiot.
He was looking at the beagle now:
"Okay."
Sumire jumped slightly as he approached the cage. He started to undo the latches and she darted to him. She grasped his hands.
"You can't do that!"
"I told you, they're human, we're all human. We just got turned into dogs, un."
"I don't… I can't…"
"How else could I have been in that cage?"
Their eyes met again. What is wrong with me? Her small, warm hands slowly slid off his.
A faint smile appeared on his lips, fondness present in his softened features. Maybe she has some sense of us… I can't make heads or tails of all this, but at the very least she might be able to help us, if I can get her to calm down completely. He opened the cage and the beagle calmly exited.
"Can you understand him?" she asked curiously.
"Ah, he says we have to get out of here, we can't afford to be separated, un."
Call the police. He's going to steal all of the dogs.
"I know this is really confusing and scary, but I need you to trust me. At any moment the rest of us could turn back and it'd be a huge mess. We'd go to jail for being perverts or witches or something and they'd run tests on us, un."
"Why should I believe you?" The voice in her head continued to scream for her to run, but her feet remained planted firmly on the ground.
"You saw it for yourself. One second I was a dog the next I was back to human."
"…what was… what was all that stuff you said earlier… about… about us… working together?"
"Don't worry about that right now. We can talk more about it when we're somewhere safe, un."
Her anxiety returned in a cold wave. Her body suddenly felt heavy. I'm gonna pass out again.
"Sumire." He cautiously placed his hands on her shoulders.
She stiffened.
"I am just as confused as you are, but I know somewhere deep down you know me and you trust me. Why else would you have come back in?"
Something was familiar in his soft touch. The fingers that squeezed her did not frighten her. Her eyes became watery again. She was arguing with herself. A part of her said to run away and call the police, the other demanded that she listen to what he had to say.
"Geeze," she wiped her tears. "I don't know why I think you're right."
He patted both of her cheeks.
"That's what you do when you're embarrassed," he laughed.
Her face was completely flushed now.
"I get it! Okay! So what do we do?" I can't believe I'm going along with this, this is totally nuts.
"Pein-kantoku wants to get us out of here, un."
"So… the beagle is Pein… kantoku?"
"He's the concert hall director."
"Oh," she nodded her head at the beagle staring up at her. "It's nice… to meet you."
"The Chihuahua is Tobi, the tall ugly one in the corner is Hidan."
The greyhound snarled at him.
"The big brown one is Kakuzu, the fluffy bluish one is Kisame, and the black one is the Uchiha."
"Uchiha?"
"Itachi's his first name."
"Ah."
"And the little one," he put a fist to his mouth, "the one you gave a bath to…"
I gave… oh gosh…
"That's danna, Sasori-no-danna." He chuckled.
A low growl came from the reddish-brown dachshund. Her face became bright red.
"I'm so sorry." She blurted and bowed.
"Pein-kantoku says we need to get out of here at the very least, but it'd be tough walking out with a bunch of dogs, un." He was speaking half to her and half to the beagle seated at their feet.
"I-I have a car… it might be big enough, but where do you need to go?"
"We can't go back to that shack we were in, they'll find us again. We need somewhere to hide until we can figure out how to change everyone back, un."
"…"
No. That's stupid. Sumire what are you doing? Stop it right now.
"…I… my studio apartment allows dogs, there's a two dog limit though…"
But if you take them all to your apartment, what are you going to do? Come back and call the police then and say the dogs were stolen?
Sounds like a great plan to me.
"Are you okay with taking us there?"
She nodded.
Sumire. You. Are. An. Idiot.
He sighed in relief then grinned at her. She blushed a bit then went back to the breakroom to find her keys and her purse.
Give her back her phone.
"What?" Deidara looked down at the small dog.
If she thinks you stole it from her then we may lose her trust.
"I did steal it."
Pretend you found it for her.
He waited for her to return and did as the other dogs had told him. She thanked him and went to the very back door. She glanced around outside while Deidara let the rest of the dogs out of their cages. When the coast was clear she led the pack to her car. They piled in and she took the driver's seat. Deidara sat beside her the beagle leaping over his lap then placing its paws on the dashboard, barely able to stare over the edge of it.
"Be careful, you might fall." She said to it.
It looked at her briefly then settled for being beside the mostly naked blonde man.
Here we go, I guess. She thought while shifting the gears.
I'm totally going to get fired, but well… whatever.
A/N: Total crack fic. XD