I sit in the living room waiting for the torture to begin. I can't believe I forgot today was Friday. With all the avoiding Finn I've been doing at school I just end up trapped in a room with him. Urgh, it's just my luck.

Everyday this week, Leo and I have sat on our own lunch table discussing tactics of ways he could get Brianne to talk to him again.

"It's so frustrating. I keep trying but she just keeps slipping further away," groaned Leo.

I rolled my eyes. "Did you ever give any thought that maybe she doesn't want to talk to you because you're in a relationship and she likes you?" He looked up at me, his eye tired and upset. I felt an overwhelming sense of guilt. "I'm beginning to think this wasn't such a good idea."

"You still not talking to Finn, huh?"

"Well, even if this"-I gestured between the two of us-"wasn't going on, I still wouldn't be talking to him. He lied to me and it hurt my feelings. It was just what he said that caused my explosion." Leo nods and sighs, his shoulders slumping down.

Someone sits down on the opposite sofa but I continue looking at my hands.

"Hey, Riley."

I don't look up, but I have to concentrate on keeping my fists from clenching. My natural scowl grows stronger.

"Still not talking to me?"

I turn my head away. I hear him sigh. He's probably running his hands through his hair, like he always does when he's stressed. It almost makes me feel bad and want to comfort him. Almost.

"Riley, I'm sor-"

I stand up and walk out of the room. I know I want to hear him apologise, but he doesn't deserve my forgiveness. Not yet. He needs to earn it.

I enter my room, deciding to complete the English essay for mine and Finn's project, until dinner. When I'm finished, I write a to-do list for Finn, so we can finish the project with as little interaction as possible.

"Dinner, Rye!"

I walk down the stairs, enter the dining room and sit down in the only free seat available: opposite Finn.

"How come Maddie isn't here?" I ask Gale, his nostrils flare and Madge giggles.

"She's on a date, much to her Father's dismay," smirks Madge. He scowls down at his plate.

"Don't worry, Mr Hawthorne. Jack is my best friend and he would do anything for Maddie," says Finn. "Right, Riley?"

I ignore him and look at Gale. "Jack's a really great guy. He respects her more than anyone. He's actually kind of smitten," I try to reassure him, and he smiles, but still looks unconvinced.

Finn sighs and starts to eat. I do the same and we sit in silence while the adults talk. All of them are now curious as to why we're not talking, as usually we're the ones making the most noise.

"So, Finn, Rye, how's school?" asks Mum.

"Fine," I reply shortly, shoving some potato into my mouth.

"Rye and I have to perform a piece of Shakespeare in English class in a couple of weeks," says Finn, trying to get me to respond. I raise my eyebrows in acknowledgement and he slams his knife and fork down on the table, everyone going quiet almost immediately.

"Rye, can you come outside with me for a second?" he asks politely, his eyes flashing with anger. He doesn't wait for an answer, he just stands up and walks out the back door into the garden. I sigh, rolling my eyes and follow him out. Everyone's eyes watching me.

When I get outside I close the door behind me and fold my arms, waiting for Finn to say something. We stand in silence for a while, both of us waiting for the other. He lets out a growl.

"Damn it, Rye, when are you going to talk to me?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of the bullshit," I say sarcastically.

"This isn't a joke Rye," he says sternly.

"Does your ass get jealous of your mouth? An awful lot of shit does come out of it," I joke again, just to push his buttons. He lets out another growl and grabs my shoulders.

"I said I was sorry! When are you going to talk to me?"

"When you realise that what you did can't just be fixed by saying sorry!" I roughly push his arms off of me and glare at him. Both our voices have raised and I can't hear any chatter from indoors. They're undoubtedly listening in, but I'm so mad I can't seem to care. "You lied to me, Finn! You lied to me and then made me feel like a fucking jerk when I hadn't told you something that happened the evening before. That's bollocks!"

"I didn't tell you what happened because I didn't know how you'd react!" he shouts. "Obviously, badly."

I laugh sarcastically. "Y'know what? Why don't you go to Marina and cry about it, huh?" I turn to storm away but he grabs my arm and pulls me back.

"Don't bring her into this now," he hisses.

"Isn't this all about her?" I ask, innocently. "I spent a whole fucking week listening to you talk about how perfect she is and how beautiful she is. And you have the audacity to say 'you didn't know how I'd react' as the reason you didn't tell me? Bullshit. I faked a smile all the way through those conversations. You should have been thinking that I'd be okay with it."

"Why were you faking smiles? Why aren't you okay with it? Eh?" Finn looks me in the eyes and I falter. I can't tell him.

"Because you deserve so much better than her," I whisper. He can't know, but he can still know how I feel, at least a little. It's now I realise how close we are. "You deserve the world, Finn, and she can't give it to you."

"Then who can?" he breathes. I shiver lightly and drop my eyes to the floor.

"Finn-" I start, but he shushes me.

"Riley, not talking to you kills me. I don't want to lose you over something like this," he tells me quietly. He lifts my chin so I'm looking at him. We look at each other for what seems like forever, but then his eyes flick down to my lips. We've both been leaning in and we're centimetres apart now. I want to say something. Remind him we're both in relationships, however fake mine is. I want to stop this. But I don't want to.

Our lips just brush when Finn pulls away, looking ashamed. My stomach plummets to the floor as he turns away.

"I'm sorry, Rye. I'm so sorry, but-"

"Marina, I get it," I say.

"And Leo." I nod, feeling like laughing over the fact Leo would actually be overjoyed over what was going to happen. Instead I wrap my arms around Finn and bury my face in his neck. I feel him squeeze me back and, as much as I don't want to let go, I do. I turn away and walk back into the house, holding back tears.

I don't know how much longer I can do this. I can't keep on pretending like my feelings for Finn don't surface every time I see his smile, or his frown, or his voice, or tired eyes at three in the morning when he can't sleep, or lazy grin whenever he catches me staring. But he's with Marina. And as much as it breaks my heart, it breaks it more to keep doing what I've been doing this past week.

As I walk back into the dining room, all the adults still sit at the table watching me. I gulp and smile slightly. "Thanks for dinner; I'm not really hungry anymore." I slide past them and run upstairs. I close the door and slide down against it, willing myself to not cry over Finn any more than I already have.