HEY GUYS I'M BACK AFTER 4 YEARS OF NOT UPDATING
I'm finally going to finish this story so I do apologise for typos etc. I don't tend to proof read, oops. This story started when I was doing my first year of GCSEs and now I'm in university, so it's been a long time coming. Enjoy! - panemsbest
Finn and I seemed to be in a state of limbo. The hours of class we had together were agonising with less conversation than two people who don't speak the same language. Even when he didn't remember me we had more things to say than we do right now. I think that hurts more than fighting with him. At least then we weren't talking because I had chosen not to, not because we had nothing to say.
The bell goes and as I'm collecting my books, Finn breaks the silence.
"What do you have after lunch?"
"Art, I think," I reply.
"Could we… maybe walk home together?" he asks, cautiously.
Apologising, I tell him "Leo and I have a shift at the bakery. You can walk with us if you like?" My offer seems to upset him. He even winces slightly at the thought, as if time in the company of me and my fake boyfriend hurt him physically.
"No, it's okay. Don't worry about it."
Sighing, I grab my bag. "Alright, well… I'll see you at the game."
His sad expression makes me want to roll my eyes and hug him at the same time. He can tell I'm still annoyed with him by this statement but I'm glad as hopefully it'll make him realise that things just don't go back to normal because he sat in his assigned seat in chemistry.
At the end of the day, I meet Leo by my locker. We begin to make our way out of the school and I feel a million eyes on me. They're probably looking at Leo, the star quarterback ready to lead his team to victory tonight. But I feel like they're looking at me. Judging me. Why do they have to stare like that?
The attention makes me dizzy. My heart is beating so fast and loud it's like there's a drum in my chest. The panic sets in. The world is moving in both fast and slow motion as I look around.
Leo's been dealing with my panic attacks since I was a kid, and recognises I need to get the fuck out of there.
Trying to calm me down he tells me, "Tighten all your muscles, Rye. Tighten them till you can tighten them anymore and take a deep breath. Have you done that?" I nod. "Good. Now let it all out. Relax everything as you empty your lungs." I do as he says. In, out. In, out. In, out. In-
We're outside. I let out a final breath, my hands shaking and my chest still tight.
"God, I can't wait to dump you and go back to being invisible," I laugh, quietly.
Leo hugs me tight and muffles, "It'll be an honour to be dumped by you, Orion."
At work, Leo and I try our best to distract ourselves from what happened and focus on what will happen this evening. Leo always gets nervous before his games so talks a lot about the party afterwards. He tells me things like who will be there, what happened at the last post-game celebration and his closest friends on the team. I, on the other hand, as much as I'm trying to listen, am planning my escape route from the party. After we break up, I'm going to need to get out of there as fast as I can. Mum told me she'd pick me up as soon as I called, but there will still be a delay between the call and me diving into the passenger seat of my parent's car.
"What are you two still doing here?" My Dad's voice makes the two of us jump.
"Not much to be honest with you, Sir," Leo replies. "I've messed up my choux pastry for the eclairs twice now. Twice!"
My Dad laughs. "No, I mean, don't the two of you have somewhere to be?"
Leo and I look at each other confused, then look at the clock above the doorway my Dad is stood in. the clock reads 6:15. The game starts in 20 minutes.
"SHIT!" "FUCK!"
My father, bless his heart, choses to ignore our profane language in favour of laughing. As we run out the door I hear him shout good luck, to whom however I am unsure. Throwing our bags into Leo's car, which he leaves parked outside the bakery in the mornings, we make our way to school. And I won't lie, a few speed limits were broken along the way.