Thank you for your enthusiastic reviews! There were a few doubts and questions, but unfortunately we can't get to them in this chapter as there is so much else going on. Next one then!

Also, I love how positive you people are on the whole situation. The majority of you agreed that even though it was sad, Edward and Bella could put everything behind them and move on with their life. Very wise!

Chapter-31

I spend the rest of the day, and most of the night thinking about the extraordinary revelations I have been subjected to. I know that sleep won't come easily, so I don't even try.

What twists and turns life takes sometimes! As a maid I had never even dreamt that such a drama would occur in my life. My imagination was limited to what I had seen in my parents' marriage—a steady affection for each other and their children, a companionship that would last till one of them passed away, and the responsibilities for their family and the society in general. They had disagreements, yes, but they never escalated to heated arguments. I could not imagine one of them doing anything to hurt the other, let alone betray their trust in any manner. There could be no situation where my mother would consider leaving my father and her home, or he her and his children.

For it did occur to me, leaving Edward and the estate behind, with their secrets and complications. Making a new life for me and my children. It was more than a passing thought, even though I knew it was impossible.

Where would I go? Could I go back to my parents and be dependent on them, and for how long? What explanation would I give? I could not tell them the truth, and no other reason could be strong enough to leave my husband. Especially a husband who they knew doted on me and Lizzie.

It would be such a scandal too. I knew nobody in the village who had left their spouse for good, and only two women who had left their husbands for a short time because of some terrible fight. I could perhaps ask Edward to make an arrangement for me to live elsewhere; that was indeed possible, and he would probably not refuse me out of guilt. It would provide people fodder for gossip for years, I supposed, but at least it wouldn't be a scandal. And among the nobility it was not an uncommon happening, so nobody would bat an eye.

But did I really want to? I had married Edward expecting we would live together for the rest of our life. Even when I had got married the first time and been upset at Anthony (on discovering that he was not the man who had met me in the sun room) I was still his wife, and that was that. With Edward it had been more complicated, my head demanding that I remain loyal to Anthony while my heart wanted to give in to the attraction I felt for Edward. But once we were married, there was no question of not being a good wife to him and remaining with him till my last breath.

Of course, now I also love him.

Curiously enough, when I picture living apart from Edward, it is not my feelings alone that stop me from making an actual plan. In that picture I look miserable, and so does Lizzie, but Edward looks the most miserable of all of us. The love that he feels for both of us and showers on us most generously—that love I cannot doubt for a single moment. And what of our baby? Edward had vowed not to miss even a day in his growing up, but if we lived apart, would it be possible for him to see him or her every day? If not, would it not be a crime on my part to deprive Edward of seeing his child every morning and evening?

I cannot do that. I cannot keep a father away from his children because of a sin he had committed as a callow youth years ago. I cannot see him sad and guilt-ridden for the rest of his life. And if I am honest with myself, I do not want to stay away from him.

Whatever happened in the past was the responsibility of all three of us. Anthony is beyond any human frailty now, eaten away by the guilt of deceiving me and perhaps of keeping Edward away from me and Lizzie. But Edward and I have paid the price too. Should we be not absolved of our past sins and allowed to live in content with our children? Why should I throw away the only chance at happiness I have now?

At dinner Edward looks sad, yet he makes light conversation and tries to smile bravely. Mrs Stanley asks about my health and fusses over me in general, almost like my own mother would in this situation. And I had believed that she was a cold woman until I got married to Edward. How wrong I had been!

Even Jasper makes an appearance at the end of the meal and enquires as to how I am feeling. I assure him that I am feeling perfectly fine and ask him about his plans. He informs me that he will be leaving early in the morning tomorrow.

"I will take my leave now, my lady, for I do not wish to disturb you in the morning."

"Is there something Lord Edward can do for you, Jasper?" I ask, feeling bad for him. "Do you need any kind of help to secure your future plans?"

He bows formally. "My lady is very kind. But I have enough to go by, and my cousin has offered me a job, so I will be all right. May the good Lord bless this household, for I have received nothing but kindness from its occupants. Good night my lady; my lord."

He withdraws then, leaving me to mull over the vagaries of life. As long as Anthony was alive, Jasper must have assumed he would spend his life serving him. Still, at least he had a family that could support him while he began a new career. Some people did not even have that to look forward to.

I suppose most valets would have tried to go into service with a new master. Perhaps Jasper just does not have the heart to replace Anthony.

Edward walks with me to my bedroom, but makes no move to come inside. I have asked him to give me time, and he is doing exactly that. With a 'sleep well' and a kiss on my forehead, he bids me good night.

Alice brings me a cup pf herbal tea from Mrs Stanley, saying it will help me sleep. I have it with thanks, but it is a long time before my eyes close in repose.

My sleep is heavy and plagued with conflicting dreams, and when I wake up the remnants of the last dream are still lingering in my sleep-dazed mind. In this dream, Edward and Anthony were shouting at each other, their voices growing louder and louder. I cannot remember what they were arguing over, because even though they were shouting their words didn't make any sense to me. I shake my head and blink, trying to clear my head, but the shouting persists.

This is not a dream. Someone is actually yelling, mostly using swear words I have never heard anyone speak in mixed company.

I frown. Is Mr Stanley scolding a servant? I am aware that he does so sometimes, but he is always very dignified. I cannot for the life of me imagine him losing his temper and creating such a racket, let alone use words like cur and mongrel, to say nothing of others.

Before I can decide what to do, the door to my room is pushed open and Alice rushes inside. Her eyes are wild, her face pale and her whole body trembling. But what alarms me the most is the thin rivulet of blood making its way down from her temple to her chin.

"Alice, what is the matter?" I ask, my heartbeat speeding up. I have never seen her in such a state; she is always calm and smiling.

"My lady, it's Lord Masen! He is going to kill Jasper!"

I stare at her in astonishment. Has she lost her mind?

"What in heaven's name are you talking about, Alice? Why would Edward want to kill Jasper?"

She shakes her head frantically. "Not Lord Edward, my lady, Lord James—he is beating Jasper with his cane. I tried to stop him, but—"

As soon as I hear James, I pull on my robe and rush to Edward's room. Well, as much as I can in my heavily pregnant state. And I don't knock.

"Edward!" My voice breaks with fear as I reach his bed. What is James doing here? He was supposed to come here only after the birth of our baby.

He sits up so suddenly that I take a step back, startled. The next moment he is on his feet and reaching for my hand, his eyes worried.

"Bella, what happened? Are you all right? Is there something wrong with the baby?"

Of course his first thought would be this. He loves us so much.

"No, I mean, we are fine. It's Jasper—James is here and he is beating him badly!"

Edward's room is further off from the hall, so it's not surprising that he didn't wake up earlier. But now that he knows, he doesn't waste a second.

"Go to your room, Bella. I will see what the matter is." He pulls on his own robe over the pyjamas he is wearing and runs out of the room. I follow him at a distance.

Early morning sunlight is breaking in the hall, giving form to the furniture and other objects there but not much colour. However, there is no difficulty in recognising the two men in front of Edward—James, his features distorted with fury and his arm raised to strike again, and Jasper, crumpled on the floor and whimpering with unmistakable pain. I can't see his face, but I can see that he is cradling his arm close to his body and trying to protect his head at the same time. The way he is lying there, not even protesting the beating he has received, makes me sick to the stomach.

Edward grabs James' wrist before he can strike the broken man at his feet.

"James," he thunders as he twists the cane out of his grasp and throws it away. It clatters loudly as it hits the wall on the opposite side of the large room. "Have you gone mad? Why are you beating my valet? Why are you here in the first place?"

"Your valet, ha!" James snorts like a bull, his tone condescending in the extreme. "Your valet is a thief and a liar. He was trying to sneak out of the house with Anthony's personal effects before you woke up. It is a good thing I reached here at the right time and caught him red-handed. Now call for the constable and hand this rogue over to him."

Jasper mumbles something that is incomprehensible to us.

"Keep your mouth shut, you traitorous snake!" hisses James. He lifts his foot to kick him, but Edward pushes him back. Hard. He barely keeps his balance.

"He is neither a thief nor a liar," he roars, his face red with anger. "Jasper is leaving my service, and since he served Anthony faithfully for years, I gifted him a few of his things. Not that it is any business of yours what goes on in my household. Now explain why you are here, you devil-possessed brute!"

I had never imagined a day when Edward would push James and swear at him. Time has indeed changed him.

"Devil-possessed, am I?" James tone remains as arrogant as before. "I came here because a report reached me that your wife had lost her baby. I wanted to commiserate with you on your loss. As to my business, anything related to my son is my business." His eyes narrow even more, giving him a really mean look. "Did you really give Anthony's clothes to a servant? What possessed you to do that?"

Edward shakes his head. "I don't believe you for a second. There was no such report. And I wasn't going to wear Anthony's clothes, was I? What better use for them but to go to a man who would value them as long as they would last? Don't you know how devoted he was to your son?"

"So devoted that you gave him this ring?" James produces a heavy gold ring from his pocket and shows it to Edward with a sneer.

Edward does not flinch. "I did. It was the least I could do for him."

"You are unbelievably naive, boy. You are showing kindness to a man who committed the deepest sin, but you didn't know that, did you?" With an air of a magician who is going to produce a tiger from his hat, he takes out a small daguerreotype from his other pocket and thrusts it in front of Edward. I cannot see it from where I stand, but I suppose it is one of Anthony. "Look at its back, and tell me why this knave should not be hanged in public?"

Mr Stanley enters the hall from the opposite direction, his clothes clearly put on in some haste and his expression perturbed. I had not seen any of the servants in the hall, but either I had not paid attention or they had remained hidden, unwilling to face the black wrath of our uninvited guest. And one of them must have informed the butler.

"Stanley," says Edward even as he stares at whatever James is pushing in his face, "Jasper needs medical attention. Please send a footman to fetch Carlisle. Quickly. And take him to his room so he can lie down."

His lack of reaction only infuriates James further. He steps forward until they are almost nose to nose and prods Edward in the chest. "You—you knew. You knew about Jasper, didn't you? You and Anthony made a fool of me!" He screeches the last sentence, spittle flying from his mouth. He truly looks like a madman. I gasp in fear.

The sound makes him turn to me. Before Edward can move, James is striding towards me.

"Did you know as well? He snarls, towering over me. "Were you part of the whole charade? Did Anthony even sleep with you? Is Elizabeth his daughter or a bastard?"

At first I stare back at him, clueless as to what he is asking, but the last two questions have my face flaming with embarrassment. Unfortunately, James draws the correct conclusion from that piece of evidence. Even as Edward screams at him to leave me alone, James has his hands around my neck, squeezing hard.

"It is all your fault, you useless woman," he spits as he grinds his teeth. "If you could have kept Anthony in your wretched bed, he would not have strayed. I will kill you!"

"Leave my lady alone!" screams Alice, pulling at his arm, but he merely shrugs her off with a curse. Edward is beating on his other arm and trying to pull it away, but James only squeezes harder. I can't breathe; darkness begins to descend upon me.

There is a crash, and suddenly the hands around my throat are gone, and I can breathe. As I suck in a lungful of air, there is a stabbing pain in the lower part of my abdomen. I clutch my stomach, almost tumbling forward in agony, but Edward catches me before I fall.

"Bella, what's wrong?" His face swims in front of my eyes.

"I—think…the baby…is coming."

A.N. What do you think was on the back of the picture? And what happened to James?

Of course, for men like James everything is the fault of the woman!

I had the honour of being the pre-reader for Rochelle Allison's Heavenly Bodies, and I loved it. Nobody writes teenage years like she does! It is available on Goodreads, if you would like to pre-order.

Fic Recs: Atmosphere by Christie Hart. It is AU, so I was a little doubtful at first. But once I began to read it, I could not stop. The intensity, the characterization, and the slow-simmer of romance between Edward and Bella. I was floored!

There's A Word For It by Eiluned Price. Again, I was sceptical, thinking what new could be there in a story where Bella was human and Edward a vampire. But trust me people, it is very, very different and extremely well-written. Try it!