Chapter 2:
What if you were treat like a baby, would you disappear, would you run away from your problems, would you die inside your soul.
As a doctor who has been out of work for 2 ½ months it's never easy to go back to work. Today is my first day back to work and I am nervous, because I'm not the same Dr. Shepherd as I was before leaving for Washington DC. Before I head to work I'm going to drop Zola, and Bailey because Meredith is already at work for the morning even though she isn't feeling good because this pregnancy different from Bailey's. "Daddy you're going to be late for work and surgeons can't be late because people die" explained Zola who is so adorable when she says it. "Zola it's okay daddy isn't going to be late because I don't have to go to work until 9:00 but I'm going to drop Bailey and you off at daycare at 8:00 because its daddy's first day since his accident" I explained to my sweet daughter.
The drive to the hospital was scary because I was thinking of the last time I was on the neurology floor and it wasn't exactly where I wanted to be but I was transferred from that small hospital to here in Grey Sloan memorial hospital due to my car accident. As I got to the hospital it seemed like everyone was ignoring the fact that I actually came back because of my accident. Dropping the children off was relaxing. When I got to the attending's lounge I felt like I was a fragile baby. Dr. Avery told me that I could only do consults until I was able to operate even though I was cleared by my own sister who lives with me. "Derek you can sit and watch my appendix surgery I have scheduled, because you can't do anything but do consults" explained Miranda Bailey. I didn't know how to act to the way I was treated because with the old me I could do whatever I wanted to do because I wasn't on any kind of strict work load.
I felt awful being treated like a fragile baby when I'm a 42 year old man who had an accident but that should change the way people treat me. I use to do it to my sister because she was a recovering drug addict. But as a Neurosurgeon who was one of the best being treated like my son isn't something I signed up, yeah I was in an accident but that wasn't my fault it was the truck driver's fault. "Derek what's wrong" asked Amelia. "Amy I was treated like a helpless baby because I came back to work for the first time in 2 ½ months" I explained to my sister. "Oh Derek don't feel bad I had the same issue when I lost my son and was sober" Amelia explained. I felt like I wasn't alone and I had someone who knew what I was going through. So far being treated like a baby makes sense because it helps me build my strengths that I lost during the accident. I still have to go to physical therapy but I only go once a week now that I'm finally able to go back to work. "Derek I need you its urgent" explained my pregnant wife. I followed her into the on call rooms where she wanted to have a little fun time, until I got paged. "Meredith we can do this when we get home I'll pick the kids up at 6:00" I explained to her.
Amelia paged me to Arizona's office. "Amy what's going on are you okay do I need to call mom" I asked panicky. "Derek Amelia is fine she is just having an anxiety attack because I got her blood work back and it came up positive for pregnancy" explained Arizona. I told Arizona that she is just scared because of her history with her previous pregnancy. It was 5:00 I decided to sign off early and pick up the kids with my pregnant sister, to head home after a long day that I haven't been use to since before the accident. "Amy everything is going to be alright Meredith, and I are going to take good care of you and this child" I explained to her. "Derek it's not that, it's just that the baby's father is overseas now and won't be back for the birth of his child" explained Amelia. I knew that Owen her boyfriend and my friend was overseas for medical training in Iraq. I know it must be hard for her to be pregnant with her boyfriend's baby and not have him apart of the whole pregnancy. I know if Owen knew about the baby he would be overjoyed because he wanted a baby with Christina but she didn't want any children.
About a week ago Meredith found out that Christina is getting married and is expecting a baby and wants to actually keep it. I was shocked over Christina wanting to keep a child. Was it because we handle Zola, and Bailey well, is it because she didn't want to be alone for the rest of her life and become a parent, or is it that Switzerland changed her idea of life and what like was actually like. Knowing that 3 of my female family members was actually pretty cool because they are all due around the same time. Christina is hoping to have a baby boy that is sweet like Bailey. Amelia wants a son but not to replace the son she already lost her wants a son so Bailey had a boy cousin to play with, now I want a daughter so Zola could play with her little sister. I know that none of us actually chose what we want but I guess I'll get what I get and ill love that child no matter what.