Harry Potter and the Order of the Chronic
Meal with a Hutt
I don't own any of the characters, all JKR, no profit to be made.
"Listen… Hermione I can't be held responsible for what happened back there."
"I didn't say you were responsible. I just said that we should have done something. Professor Snape is a teacher after all." Hermione replied with a sigh at the point she had been trying to make.
"Yeah, but not a good one." Ron muttered hastily with a snort.
Harry couldn't help, but laugh. "That was a good one Ron." Harry said giving Ron a shot to the arm.
Hermione seemed to grunt something unintelligible and marched ahead of the boys as they made their way to the Great Hall for the opening feast and sorting. Harry didn't mind and shrugged to show his feelings on the matter before turning back to Ron to discuss the start of term party to be held following the feast.
xxx
Harry took his seat across from Hermione and stared down expectantly at his golden plate. "So hungry I could eat a horse."
"You Notice Snape isn't back yet." Ron said with a wicked smile taking a seat next to Harry.
"Well did you also notice Hagrid is missing?" Hermione asked in a rather smug voice.
"Hermione he is probably just blending in or something." Harry said not even bothering to check the staff table. His vision was situated on Malfoy who was now sitting at the Slytherin table with a huge smudge mark on his forehead from where he tried to wipe away Harry's words.
"Blending in? Since when does Hagrid blend in?" Hermione scoffed.
Harry let out a heavy sigh and looked up at the staff table. "Fine Hermione he isn't here, are you happy now?"
Hermione nodded a bit "And did you notice…"
"Hey who is that up there?" Ron blurted out motioning to a new figure up at the staff table.
"I was just about to…" Hermione began to say before Harry cut in.
"Are you sure that's a person?" Harry said his face scrunching up in disgust.
"It is probably the new Defe…" Hermione began to sputter.
"Nice cardigan." Ron interrupted with a smirk, while Hermione gave up and buried her face into her crossed arms on the table.
"I could care less about the cardigan. I'm pretty sure that's Jabba the Hutt right there." Harry replied with a point in the creatures general direction.
Dean, who sat on Harry's other side, began laughing and beating his fist on the table in an effort to control himself. Even Hermione's back began to shake from laughter as she continued to rest her face in her arms.
"Hey I'm just saying, you know, that thing might just ruin my appetite." Harry said looking to Dean and Hermione.
"Who is Jabba the Hutt?" Ron asked completely bewildered by the conversation.
Harry blanched at Ron, his expression now in horrified awe. "Ron, I know wizards don't embrace muggle things, but how do you not know of the greatest trilogy in all mankind?"
Harry and Dean began to explain the epic trilogy of Star Wars to Ron during the Sorting Hat's song and continued on through the entire sorting ceremony till all was quiet and Dumbledore rose up to speak.
"To our newcomers welcome! To our old hands, welcome back! There is a time for speech making, but this is not it. Tuck in!" Dumbledore spoke in a ringing voice and was greeted with an appreciative laugh and applause, though Harry scowled a bit.
"Food finally." Ron said dishing it on his plate in heaps.
"Agreed." Harry murmured from his side doing the same.
"Did you two even listen to the Sorting Hat's song?" Hermione asked with a hint of scrutiny.
Ron and Harry shared a glance at each other before turning to Hermione. "No."
"The hat was speaking of house unity and how we should remain united in the face of evil!" Hermione whispered in a severe sort of way.
"Fat chance." Ron muttered with a glance at the Slytherin table.
"You know a little house unity wouldn't be such a bad idea." Hermione interjected "And Harry I really wish you'd rethink your position on You-Know-Who. Clearly the Sorting Hat can sense the danger."
Harry gulped down the food he had in his mouth before waving a fork in Hermione's direction. "Let me tell you something about that hat! Hat's don't have brains Hermione and because of this they do not have a nervous systems and therefore…" Harry began to delve into a long scientific spiel about anatomy and thought processes that lasted the entire rest of the feast.
"And therefore that hat can make no solid conclusion on anything." Harry finished with a triumphant look as Dumbledore began to give his, end of the feast speech, which virtually ignored by the trio.
Hermione stared at Harry with her mouth agape.
"Did you understand any of that?" Ron asked Hermione.
Hermione replied with a shake of her head.
"Yeah, that's right Hermione. Don't ever try to judge me again." Harry said with a snap of fingers.
"Hem, hem."
The trio broke away from the discussion to cast their gaze on the woman Harry had referred to as the Hutt.
xxx
"Potter."
"Potter."
"Potter!" Cormac said giving Harry a smack to the side of the head.
"Ah… What the fuck?" Harry muttered rubbing the side of his head as he lifted his face from the table in the Great Hall staring about groggily.
"You passed out in the middle of that fat bitches speech." Cormac muttered. "Rumor has it a big party tonight."
"Oh… yeah." Harry said dropping his hand from his head. "Well what are we waiting for?"
"Harry wait a minute." Hermione sounded as she grabbed Harry by his robes causing him to stagger back.
"What is it Hermione?" Harry said with a repressive grunt.
"Did you hear anything that woman said? It sounds as if the Ministry of Magic is going to interfere at Hogwarts!" Hermione whispered to him, even though the Great Hall was virtually empty except the small group of Gryffindors gathered awaiting Harry.
Harry pondered the news for a few moments before grinning. "Well that's good news being I told Fudge this place needed a complete makeover. I mean honestly no computers or anything. Seriously Hogwarts needed an upgr…"
"What?" Hermione shrieked. "You put the Ministry in Hogwarts?"
"What's the big deal Hermione? What did you expect? This place is way out of date so when Fudge was pinning that Order of Merlin First Class on me," Harry rubbed his hand on his chest proudly "I may have said something about how Hogwarts was way out of date with the modern world."
"Did you listen to anything the Order said?" Hermione whispered angrily. "Even though you don't believe it You-Know-Who might be back, the Order does and to have the Ministry here stepping on their toes hurts our cause."
Harry began to shake his head in a nonchalant manner preparing a retort, but Cormac spoke up from the exit door. "Potter we having a party or what?"
Harry gazed at Hermione a moment. "Damn right we do Mick."
"Potter!" A voice shrieked.
Harry turned slowly seeing McGonagall giving him a stiff stare and groaned.
"What?" Harry asked groaning inwardly to himself.
"The Headmaster wishes to see you and it is Professor to you." McGonagall replied.
Harry let out another groan. "Go on guys." Harry motioned to the group of waiting Gryffindors as he trudged after Professor McGoagall.
xxx
"So what is this all about Professor and is this going to happen every year, getting called into Dumbledore's office?" Harry asked grudgingly following McGonagall.
"I don't know Potter that is up to you." McGonagall replied stiffly. Harry assumed she must have heard about his arrival to Hogwarts and rolled his eyes.
"Whatever Ice bitch." Harry muttered to himself.
"What was that Potter?" McGonagall asked coldly.
"Ah… I said Snape's a fat git." Harry answered in an unsure manner.
They were both quiet as they reached the stone gargoyle that lead to Dumbledore's office. McGonagall uttered the password, but before Harry disappeared up the staircase McGonagall grabbed his wrist.
"Professor Snape is not really fat Harry." She said with what Harry took as a slight wink.
As the gargoyle closed Harry smiled. She didn't correct him on the git part.
End Chapter