Disclaimer: All rights belong to Disney, George Lucas, and all the men and women that created the Star Wars movies, books, and comics. I take no credit, and I do not mean to break any copyright rules. This is simply a work of fiction made for enjoyment. No money is being made. The cover art image belongs to peanutbutterroastedchestnuts. tumblr .com (remove the spaces)

Rating: T for violence, disturbing imagery, and dark themes

Author's Note: Sorry for the long wait!

Chapter 14

Core Worlds Region, Coruscant Subsector, Corusca Sector, Unknown System, 39 BBY

I ditch the Jedi as soon as we land. Obi Wan's meeting Qui-Gon at the temple, and I know I'm not welcome there, so instead I plan a day of exploring. KZ-4 actually accompanies me for once - although I think Qui-Gon may have talked him into it - and as we walk across the tops of the lower buildings, I blend into the crowd for the first time.

It seems weird to think of myself as just another tourist, especially after years of training here. All that time I had been locked away in Darth Sidious' small home, training my mind and body to become the perfect warrior, I had seen the people walking around on the different levels, couples holding hands and families bouncing along. Hate had always been my immediate reaction, and I detested them for not suffering like I had suffered. How could they live life happily with people like me around? How could they ignore such pain and agony?

Now, though, I realize there's much more to them. There's a freedom and a liberty to walking around in the crisp city air, the smell of vendors and restaurants all around, the laughter and the buzz of conversation, the whooshes of the flying ships and taxis, and the blinking lights of the city. This is more than surviving. This is actually living, taking in time to appreciate the good in the world. Someday this whole planet will be shrouded in darkness, and someday everyone here will suffer. So why not make the most of it while it's still good?

Darth Sidious had taught me to hate and to despise, and the entire time I had blindly followed, not realizing how much I was losing by having such a narrow view of the world.

Although I'd cleared my mind since leaving Anthan Prime, I can't but feel a stab of regret and pain that Xavier and Lillea never had the chance to see this. They would have loved it here. Coruscant is the city that never sleeps, and we could have done so much. Instead they died on that planet many miles away, throwing away their chance to see the world forever. There's so much they are missing out on, and now it's up to me to make it up for them. I have to experience these things so one day I can tell them all about it.

One day...I believe in life after death. The specifics escape me, but I know that one day I'll be with them again. I'll have so many stories to tell, and we'll finally be free and happy. A chill runs up my spine as I get the feeling it won't be long before I join them. A few years maybe, but not much longer. I'm destined to die young.

And somehow, that's okay. Looking at it from a distance, I'm glad I won't have to grow old. I want to be remembered as I am now, young and free and terrifying, a shadow in the dark with the power of the force behind her. I don't want to be remembered as old and frail, barely being able to handle my own.

Something snaps in me at that. I turn sharply, catching a street vendor by surprise. "Where's the nearest portal?" I ask authoritatively.

"Next block to the left," he says. I turn to leave and he adds, "Be careful. It's more dangerous than ever down there."

Oh, trust me. I'm not the one who should be worried. Following his directions, I take the portal down to the Underworld, KZ-4 protesting behind me weakly.

"I'll protect you," I promise my droid. "I'm going to deal a little justice down there. Clean up the Jedis' mess."

He lets out a squeak but follows as I step into the dark and smelly streets. The walking spaces are narrow, the sides covered in shabby shacks or little shelters. Struggling and dying people live down here, poor and bereft. Looking up, I can't even see the sky. Anger grips me; why do the Jedi sit in their temple up high, their chins raised up so they can't see the suffering and pain right below them?

I was once one of these people, and I know how bad it is. Not being able to even see the sky...it's like having no hope. I had no hope. Every alley corner reminds me of the one I laid in to die, hoping someone would come along and end me quickly. No human should ever feel that low, and I'm here now to help.

There are a trio of smokers leaning against a graffitied wall, smoke rising from their mouths as they exhaled the poison into the air. I stop in front of them, lifting my head and flicking it to disarm them of the drugs. The rolled up substance falls to the ground where I grind it in with my heel.

"Hey! Lady! Who do you think you are? You can't just do that!" They glower angrily at me, but I simply shake my head.

"Go home. Get a job, and never touch drugs again." Waving my arm across, I listen as they repeat it in a daze and start walking off to do as I order. Sometimes the force is pretty helpful.

I continue my way through the Underworld, changing things as I go and improving the lives of the poor people who live here. I'm not doing it to make the world a better place, I'm doing it to help the people. No one deserves to suffer like I did.

I've been roaming the Underworld for a few hours when I hear the scuffle. There's a shrill and high-pitched scream, one that can only belong to a child. My heart stops and I race forward, my chest tight and a lump in my throat I can't swallow past. All I can think of is my little eight-year-old self, hiding in the shadows from those who would do me harm (before I practically starved to death, that is). I'd been terrified, and it had been a miracle I'd remained unharmed. This child, though...they don't stand a chance unless I get there in time.

Skidding around a corner, I see the scene unfolding before my very eyes. A young twi'lek girl being surrounded by a trio of Kel Dors. The scary-looking species are closing in on her, and they all have clubs in their hands.

"Hey!" I yell, reaching into my belt and grabbing my lightsaber. The red blades glow brightly in the dark area. "What's your business with her?"

"Her mother owes us a debt. We're taking it," a brave answers, and my eyes narrow.

"Wrong. Try again." I run forward, but there's dozens of metres between the Kel Dors and I. Two of them begin to beat on the girl even as I run forward, the other one standing defensively in front of them. The screams filling the alley send chills up my spine but I keep pushing forward, hoping to stop it before it's too late.

A single swipe of my lightsaber takes out the guard Kel Dor, and two more lashes take out the other two. I retract the blades and drop them in my belt quickly before kneeling down on the dirty ground and reaching for the little girl. She can't be older than Lillea was when she died.

The screams had stopped before I'd killed the Kel Dors, and my heart drops as I see the girl's eyelashes fluttering weakly to stay open. Her stomach is heaving, her breathing loud, and I see her small hands holding her bloody stomach.

"It's going to be okay," I assure her as I scoop her up into my arms. My heart falls in my chest, and I swallow hard. "I'm here to protect you now."

"Is...Is my mom going to be safe?" she whispers, and I have to close my eyes hard and grit my teeth together to avoid the oncoming wave of rage. How could she ask about her mother when her mom is the reason she's dying?

"Yes," I say, but only because it's what she wants to hear. "And you're going to be safe, too."

"You're...you're a kind person. Are you my guardian angel?" her mouth curves up into a little smile, her eyes gazing past my face into the sky. She won't even get to see the stars or the sun before she passes, I realize, once again quelling the anger inside of me.

"Angels are only found on Iego," I reply, forcing a small smile. "I'm the opposite of one, actually."

"How? You came to save me…" her words trail off, her body deflating and her eyes starting to glaze over. "You were my dark defender…" She goes limp in my arms, and it takes me a moment to fully realize what had happened.

Time stops for a moment as I look at her body, her small, young corpse. Blood and bruising had stained once green skin, and the bright blue eyes had turned dark and dull. I'm transported back to when my sister died...I had held her in my arms in a very similar manner…

This time when the anger comes in, I let the crimson wave crash in me. Seeing only red, I push myself up, clutching the girl's body close to my own. My strides long and powerful with the rage blowing up inside of me, I make my way back up the portal and all the way to the Jedi Temple in the top levels of Coruscant. All thoughts of logic and wisdom are gone, replaced by insanity and anger.

The Jedi Council is all present when I burst into their doors. The guards on the previous floors had taken simply a flick of my hand to dispose of, and my power had heightened with my madness. Now I'm unstoppable.

I barely notice Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon in the corner as I walk straight through the red chairs and deposit the little girl's body on the table in the middle of them all. They all look so horrified at the sight but I simply step back, my arms crossed and my expression fierce. There's silence for a long time.

"What is the meaning of this?" Mace Windu finally asks, his voice gruff. "You are not welcome here, and you are certainly not allowed to bring your kills here." His hand dances along the handle of his lightsaber.

"My kills? I don't kill innocents. I protect them because you cannot," I seethe, my anger not subsiding in the least. "She was murdered in the Underworld a few minutes ago while I tried to save her. She's not the first, and she's not the last. Ten years ago I was laying a corner dying, and where were the Jedi to help protect and save me?" No where near.

It's a rhetorical question, but I get an answer anyway. "The Jedi protect the peace and the good of the people, not every single person. We try our best, but we're not bodyguards or policemen." It's from Yarael Poof, a Quermian with a long, pale neck. "We're sorry you suffered."

Ugh. I didn't come here for pity, especially not from the Jedi. In fact, their pity is the last I want. They can sit here and give me sad looks and kind words but I'm not going to take it. It's all fake, anyway. They all hate me deep down and I'm honestly surprised none of them have tried to kill me yet. "I'm not sorry. Because guess who picked me up and made me strong? The Sith. While you all sat here on your thrones, playing God and raising your chins up to the sky, completely oblivious to the suffering and pain of others, the Sith were recruiting and training right under your noses. I spent years here mastering the force and combat, and not once did you guys even suspect a thing."

The shock on their faces is priceless. They hadn't even realized a single thing amiss in all those years. Now that I'm admitting it, they feel stupid. Which is good. I hope they feel shame and embarrassment. It makes my anger quiet down a little to a more controllable level.

"Gods we are not," Yoda says quietly, but I see even he is pondering my words. He's supposed to be the wisest Jedi, yet even he has become a victim to his pride. Sometimes the Jedi are no better than the Sith, and I think they are beginning to realize it, even if it has taken me coming and and telling them all off. So I, of course, continue.

"There are thousands of you guys, and you can't even protect little, defenseless children from dying at your feet? Her blood is on your hands, and so is the blood of all the others. You parade around as if you are so strong and wise yet you trip into the chasm at your feet." I shake my head, completely disgusted.

"And you think you are better than we are? You, who uses the dark side of the force to achieve your own selfish goals?" This time the opposition is from Chalactan Depa Billaba. Her face is passive and her mind clear as she addresses me. I almost have respect for her (except she's a Jedi and right now I don't respect any of them, my friends Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon included).

"I've put more effort into cleaning up the Underworld in the past few hours than you've spent in decades. And doing good things isn't even part of my philosophy. You all are so blinded by thinking you're perfect when you miss what is right in front of you." I uncross my arms and step forward, my arms outstretched. "I mean, for one, you didn't even know there was one Sith on Coruscant, let alone two until I told you. My master comes here often and not once have you even detected it. Part of your problem is that you've build this temple on an old Sith shrine, which uses dark magic to affect your thinking, but that's a minor thing. Your biggest problem is that you're not as wise as you think you are, and some day soon it's going to cost you."

It's silent in the Jedi Council for a while. For the first time I notice Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon in the corner, both of them with their heads down. They're avoiding me, but whether it's because they realize my words to be true and they're ashamed or because they think I'm lying is beyond me. I tend to think it's the former.

"Wise, you are," Yoda finally says, speaking up. The others look at him in shock. "Blinded us, our pride has. Foolish, we have become." Thank you, Master Yoda. The most intelligent Jedi has finally given me credit where credit is due.

"How can you say that?" Ki-Adi Mundi questions, the slightest edge of anger in his voice, his tall cone head bobbing up. But seriously, how can he not say that? I love embarrassing the Jedi, but if they hadn't been so messed up I would have never come up here to their very council room.

"See the future you do," Yoda continues, ignoring the others and looking at me. I nod in agreement.

"I see the Jedi killed. All of you. A disturbance in the force, and a shifting of power. The dark side will rule for years, unchallenged and ruthlessly. Destruction will reign over the galaxy."

"All of us?" Mace Windu exclaims. "That's impossible. There are too many of us."

I shake my head. "All but a small handful, but even those will go into exile and many will give up the Jedi ways in order to survive. You all are doomed."

Silence reigns as they all think about it. I know many of them don't believe me, but Yoda does. Deep down, at least, I can feel he senses my words to be true. The others don't. They think I'm lying to try and scare them or to intimidate them. They really do think themselves to be gods, indestructible and perfect in every way. And that's exactly why they will all fall so hard one day.

"You are lying to try and deceive us," Yarael Poof accuses. "First you march in here as if you belong and now you try to manipulate us. We are not fools, and we don't buy this. Leave this temple, Sith." He sneers the last word, and I feel tension creep up into my muscles. They all are such fools! Just when I think it doesn't get any worse it does.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I have zero respect for the Jedi Order.

My eyes narrow and I draw myself up, power and confidence and danger coming off of me in waves. "When you fall into the hole at your feet do not ask me to help you dig yourself out. I can put the warnings up, but if you choose to foolishly ignore them then that is your choice, and all responsibility is on your hands." My voice is low and terrifying, and everyone in the room is taken aback. My eyes feel as if they're glowing fires, directing my rage at the idiots in front of me. "I will leave, and I will never come back. You will one day want something from me, but I will not give it. Our galaxy is in the hands of fools, and I will do my best to try and keep it together for my people to one day unite again."

I gently scoop up the Twi'lek girl's body and walk out, and lights flickering as I exit. This time the dramatic elements aren't on purpose; they're a direct result of my anger. At this point I really believe that in order for the galaxy to rebuild itself it must die and let the Sith take over. My master is not a good man, but his evil will force the people and planets to unite in order to take him down, and he will abolish the Jedi Order, which is what is tearing this place apart in the beginning. In order for a new and fresh start, the old must die. And at the hands of the Jedi this will all die.

Core Worlds Region, Coruscant Subsector, Corusca Sector, Unknown System, 49 BBY

"Pain is in your mind. You must train yourself to not feel pain." Darth Sidious stands in front of me, his sickly looking hands raised menacingly. "Do not flinch or move. You must learn to take pain."

Blue tendrils of lightning shoot out of his fingers and hit me, and my body convulses and falls to the floor, the pain blocking out everything. I can't see or feel or think past the pain. It just hurts so bad.

"Don't feel the pain! Stand up!" he yells, and I struggle to even sense where my body is. The pain is a constant, ever-present pulse. It's stopping me from moving or doing. A cry rips itself from my lips.

"I said, stand up!" He increases the voltage and my body screams out in agony again. "I can do this all day. Until you stand up, I won't stop."

Seconds go by, and then minutes, and then hours. He stays true to his word. My body is in pain, so much pain, and I know I can't take this much longer. It's stopping my heart, or it will soon. Steeling myself, I first force my body to lay still and not shake. It takes a few precious moment, but I finally manage to do it.

My next task is to get my hands under me and push myself up. The pain is constantly there, but I work hard to not think about it. Anything but the pain.

I'm on my knees, and then I pushing myself up on unstable legs slowly, finally reaching my feet. He doesn't stop, though, and the pain is just increasing. He lied. Rage fills me, and I open my before-squeezed-shut eyes, glaring at him with all my anger and power behind it. He laughs and stop the lightning, his smile wide and his eyes bright.

"Well done, young apprentice. You are progressing well." His hands shoot forward again, the violent strikes coming out, but I raise my hands out defensively, calling out to the force to defend me. It does one better, pushing him backwards into the wall. He cackles again, his ugly teeth showing. "Even better. There is much anger and rage in you. So much potential."

"Then why don't you just teach me?" I hiss, my eyes narrowed.

"I am. You said you would do anything it takes, and this is only the first part. You have much to learn yet."

I nod my head, looking at the ground in submission. I had promised him. "Yes, Master."

Core Worlds Region, Coruscant Subsector, Corusca Sector, Unknown System, 39 BBY

"Where are you taking her?" Obi-Wan asks, catching me as I stride out of the Council room. My steps are wide and fast, but he keeps up.

"To get a proper burial. It's the least I can do." I continue on my way, hoping he gets the hint that I want to be left alone, but he doesn't.

"Where? We're in a city that takes up the entire planet. Unless you're going to take her back to the Underworld."

"You have a better idea?" I snap, my frustration coming out.

"Yes, actually." His words cause me to stop and confront him.

"Where?"

"We'll give her a proper Jedi burial," he declares.

A few minutes later we're standing in front of a raging fire, watching the young girl get consumed by the flames. Cremation is a high honor, especially here. It's a burial fitting for a Jedi or Sith. And she won't ever have to go back into the Underworld.

I glance down at my hands, where her blood has stained my skin. Another death I'll never get rid of in my conscience. Another reminder that I'll never be good enough, fast enough, powerful enough. I'm still too weak to save everyone. I let her down.

And yet, she still thought of me as her guardian angel. In her dying moments she looked up and saw not a cruel Sith, but a kind protector. What had she called me? Her "dark defender?"

Obi-Wan sees where I'm looking, and he sighs slightly. "The Council may not believe you, but Qui-Gon and I do. He is keeping his eyes out for the Chosen One. You've heard the prophecy, right? About the one who will bring balance to the force. He feels he will be the one to find him, and then the Council will have to believe you."

"The Council is blinded. A mist covers their eyes. They will never believe me, even when the truth is staring them right in the face." My hands drop to my sides limply. "You say I am not a threat to them, but they will come for me one day. They will sense things are amiss, and they will try and force me to reveal the Sith. I cannot fight all of the Jedi alone."

"You will not fight them alone," Obi-Wan promises. "I won't let them. You're my friend. I won't let them take you or harm you."

His promise touches me, and I send him a grateful smile. "You're not half-bad, you know that? One day you'll be as wise as Master Yoda."

He frowns, staring into the fire pyre in front of us, deep in thought. "Will the destruction of the Jedi Order happen in my lifetime?"

"You know I can't answer that question," I say, avoiding his eyes. "I won't tell you your future. It will ruin you, as it ruined Quinlan. No one is strong enough to carry that burden."

"You are," he replies immediately. "You're strong enough. You carry the weight of many lives and futures on your shoulders."

Yeah, well, not everyone has suffered like I have. It takes experience to gain the strength to carry all that weight. And trust me, I'm not asking anyone else to. I wouldn't dream of it.

"Where are we going next?" I ask, switching up the conversation. "Has the Jedi sent you and Qui-Gon on a new mission yet?"

"Actually, yes," he answers, not missing a beat. He gets when I don't want to continue a conversation. "There's a Jedi Master in need of some assistance in Kintan."

"Haven't been there before. What are we waiting for?"