The worst part is that sometimes, it almost feels real.
He'll look at her, as the cameras flash, and kiss her cheek, and he'll feel her blush beneath his lips, and it will feel like she actually loves him back. Not just as a friend, or someone to ward off the fans, but as a real boyfriend. That always ends in him feeling everything crash down, as soon as he remembers, or as soon as she reminds him.
"Whoo! They really ate that up, didn't they?" she laughs, on the roof that night. "The kiss was a nice touch, Chaton, really made it look realistic."
"Thanks," he smiles up at her, hiding the way it stung him to hear. "You did great too. I could almost think you were actually in love with me. You're a great actress, my Lady."
She grins at him. "Well, at least the creepy propositions have gone down for the most part... at least, on my end. You?"
"Yeah, me too," he nods. It's true. The fans that used to bug them constantly have, generally, ceased to do so. He's not sure the toll on his emotions is quite worth it, but if it makes Ladybug happy, then he'll comply. He'll continue the farce of a relationship that he desperately wishes were real.
"Something wrong?" she asks. "You don't seem yourself, are you okay?"
He puts on the practiced smile, and her eyes widen, instantly streaked with worry. That was not the reaction he was going for. She stands up from her perch, coming up close to him. He steps back, and her eyes narrow further. "Yes?"
"That smile is definitely not real. It's an insult to me. I have a friend who uses the exact same one, and you can't fool me with it. What happened?" she demands, grabbing his hand. "Tell me. Maybe I can help."
"I don't think you can..." he lets the smile drop. "It's my own fault. I don't want to bother you with it, it would only upset you, and then everything would be even worse."
She sighs, shaking her head. "Chat, no. You're my friend, you're allowed to tell me things, especially if something's bothering you. I promise, you won't upset me."
He cringes away. "You don't know that."
"Yes I do. Chat, I really care about you..."
There it is. The words that are true, and he's so glad they're true, but... don't mean what he wants them to. He can't keep himself from cringing away, leaving her hurt, confused. "I... I can't."
"Chat, you have to let me-"
"I don't have to do anything," he crosses his arms, looking up. "I can't tell you, because then you'll either get mad or feel guilty and I don't want either of those things to happen, I just want things to be normal, but... but it's hard to let things be normal when you know you can..."
"Can what?" she looks very hurt and a little alarmed at this point. "Chat, please-"
He cuts her off again, this time by pressing his lips to hers. Her lips are soft, and warm, and so, so still... Not kissing him back, even a bit. He steps away. "When you know you can kiss the girl you love, but only when the cameras are flashing. When everyone's talking about the romance you know will never be real."
She gasps slightly, shaking her head. "Love...?"
"Yeah."
She slowly closes her eyes, and seems to crumple. "Oh my god... Chat, I had no idea, I swear I would never have suggested faking a relationship if it had even crossed my mind..."
"It's not a big deal. It's kinda hard, sometimes, but it's not that big a deal."
"If it's hurting you, then yes, it is a 'big deal,' Chat!" She stands up straight, looking him in the eye. "Listen, I... I may not... return your feelings, but you're still my best friend, Chat. Knowing this doesn't change that for me."
He breaks his gaze away from hers. "Thank you..." he can't let himself cry. Not in front of her. Not over something like this. He knew she'd reject him, when it came down to it. He shouldn't feel this hurt...
Then her arms are around him, and he can't hold back anymore. "Let it out..." she murmurs, as he sobs into her shoulder.
The news of the "Break Up" fills the tabloids the next day.