Welcome to Chapter 11 of To Be With You!
I know it's been a long time since I updated. To be completely honest, it was pretty hard to stay motivated to write once Bleach ended...
But I'm back now! At least for the next little while!
I gotta say, reading your reviews really gives me the motivation to keep writing. And x1999Kamui, your review was so touching that I just had to update! This chapter goes out to you!
Anyway, here's to the continuation!
Chapter 11: Forgive Me
It wasn't too long after my encounter with that persistent girl that we got the news that Inoue Orihime had apparently joined forces with Aizen. And when that happened, it didn't take long for the head captain to order Matsumoto, Madarame, Ayasegawa, Kuchiki, Abarai, and me back to the Seireitei. Too bewildered at what was happening, I didn't question my new orders and quickly returned to the Soul Society.
While I can't claim to have known Inoue Orihime all that well, I feel that I can still say with utmost sincerity that she wouldn't have joined Aizen of her own free will. There was just something about her and the way she treated those dear to her that made me certain that there was more to the situation than what we were being told. After all, her kindness and cheerful personality reminded me of you… and I knew you wouldn't betray me so easily.
But, regardless of my suspicions, I didn't question the head captain's orders and quickly returned to the Seireitei. Why, you ask? Well, that's because returning to the Seireitei would let me see you again. And after our last encounter, I desperately needed to see you…
If only they had let me.
Flashback, I'm so sorry
"What do you mean I can't see her?!" I yelled at the guard that was preventing me from entering the squad four hospital room that was keeping you captive. "I demand that you let me in!"
"I-I apologize, Hitsugaya-taichou" the fourth division squad member stuttered as he tried to stand his ground against my growing temper. "But that's the head captain's and Unohana-Taichou's orders. Until she can say guarantee that Hinamori-fukutaichou is really on our side, n-no one's allowed in or out of this room..."
"...Are you suggesting that Hinamori is a traitor?" I growled back as I felt myself losing control of my spiritual pressure.
The guard then began to pale. "N-No! That's not…. Well, you know… After what she said to you-" he started but was cut off as I glared at him.
"Oh? And what did she say?" I responded as I leaned in closer to the guard. "Because if I remember correctly…. you weren't there."
"Y-Yes, t-that's true." he stuttered as he tried to back away from me, only to be stopped by the wall behind him. "B-But, I-I heard from-"
"Well, unless the person you heard it from was the head captain himself…" I began as I continued to glare at the fourth division officer. "Then that person wasn't there either, huh? So what makes you think that they would know any more about the situation than I do?"
"W-Well, for starters…" he responded, oblivious to the fact that he was just further digging his own grave. "T-They don't… I-I mean, they aren't in love with Hinamori-Fukutaichou… So they can-"
Before I could lose control of my anger in response to his comment, I felt a hand being placed on my shoulder. "Hitsugaya-taichou, please excuse my subordinate. He was only following my and the head captain's orders." Unohana said gently as she looked from me to her officer. "You may leave now, Kirigiri-san" she added before the guard gratefully left the area as fast as he could.
"Unohana…" I muttered as I turned to look at her. "Let me in to see her…"
"I'm afraid I can't." she curtly replied as she removed her hand from my shoulder. "Until she can convince the head captain of where her loyalties lie, I cannot allow anyone to see her… And that includes you, Hitsugaya-taichou."
"But this is just ridiculous!" I yelled as I slammed my fist against the wall. "Hinamori isn't a traitor! She would never betray us! She's just…just... This is all HIS fault! If it weren't for him, this wouldn't have happened! If it weren't for him, she never would have said that! If it weren't for him… she…" I then paused for a second before adding "...she wouldn't have been damaged this badly…"
"I can understand how you feel, Hitsugaya-taichou. I am the one who has been taking care of her, after all. So I can see firsthand the extent of the damage that Aizen Sousuke has inflicted upon her." Unohana replied in a gentle tone. "However, acting the way that you are now will only end up hurting her more in the end. Right now, she needs to prove to everyone that she is not Aizen's puppet. And unless she does this on her own, people will continue to question her loyalties behind her back. So please, for her sake, I need you to be patient. You and I both know that she isn't a traitor, but until the rest of the Seireitei agrees with us, we need to let her be. As painful as it may be, this is one battle that you can't fight for her."
"But she shouldn't have to go through this…" I muttered as I stared at the crack my fist had made in the wall. "Why…. Why her?!"
"The only thing we can we now" Unohana began as I dragged my gaze away from the wall and up to her "is to be ready for the final battle to come. Even if she can't be cleared before the showdown with Aizen, his defeat will definitely speed up the process. So, the only thing you can do for her now is help her take vengeance against the one who wronged her."
"Oh, Believe me, I intend to" I replied before leaving the fourth division captain alone and beginning the make my way back to my own division. "That bastard will pay…"
"Hitsugaya-taichou, please keep this in mind" I heard Unohana call out from behind me, halting me in my tracks. "If you were to lose your life in the pursuit of this vengeance, this would cause Hinamori-fukutaichou a huge blow that she may never be able to recover from. So, please, do not let your rage blind you from what is most important."
All I gave in response was a wave and a nod before continuing on my way.
After that, I spent the rest of the afternoon training. I needed to blow off some steam.
My goal then was to train as much as possible before the final battle. I couldn't afford to let the same outcome as last time happen again.
But, as fate would have it, all the time I would have was that one afternoon. Since later on that night, we received some crucial news.
"Taichou! Wake up!" I heard Matsumoto yell from outside my room, waking me instantly. "We have to get ready!"
"Huh….? For what?" I grumpily asked, still half asleep. "I swear, if this is for one of your drunken adventures, I will-"
"That's not it, Taichou!" she replied, clearly annoyed. "Ichigo and his friends went to Hueco Mundo to save Orihime! The Head Captain's calling for an emergency meeting right now! I think the final battle might be tomorrow!"
Now that had gotten my attention. I quickly got out of bed and threw on my Shinigami garbs before rushing out of my room. Matsumoto was quick to follow me as we headed to the first division.
And as it turns out, Matsumoto was right. The final battle was to be tomorrow in a replication of Karakura town.
In the mayhem of trying to organize my squad for the upcoming battle, I didn't have the chance to see you before I left. Granted, it's not like I would have been allowed to anyway, but still.
Anyway, before I knew it, I was facing down the third ranked Espada in battle….
"You've done well to evade my attacks so far, boy." the blonde Espada stated as her sword clashed with mine. "But remember, if you slip up for even a second, I will have you head."
"Wouldn't dream of it" I replied as I pushed her back. These Espada are on a whole other level compared to those guys we fought before I thought as I braced myself for another attack. I need to focus and look for an opening if I want to win this.
Suddenly, I heard a huge blast coming from where I knew Matsumoto to be fighting. Bewildered, I spared one look over there to make sure she was okay.
And that's when I spotted you…
"Just now," the Espada began as she charged at me once again. "You're spiritual pressure spiked."
"...What are you talking about?" I lied as I blocked her attack, all the while trying to get my spiritual pressure back under control.
"What happened?" she asked as she pushed me back. "It must be important, for it to distract you so much."
"The hell if I know" I answered as I push and jumped back. I need to focus I thought to myself as I caught my breath. I can't afford to mess up now.
But no matter how much I tried, I just couldn't separate my thoughts from you.
You were here. You were fighting…. Were you really okay? Why were you here?
These constant thoughts were clouding my judgement; I just couldn't focus. And when I felt Matsumoto's spiritual pressure abruptly disappear, and then yours soon after, I was prepared to rush over there and abandon my current fight. Fortunately, Kira and Hisagi were nearby and quickly came to your aid. Once I got the go-ahead from Kira that you both were going to be alright, I then turned back around to finish this fight once and for all.
And before I knew it, I was staring down the man I had sworn to kill…
"Aizen…" I began as I pointed my blade at him. "You who swings their sword out of greed and hatred…. You were never worthy of ever being called a captain of the Gotei 13. A true captain fights for duty and honour, and because of that, it is our moral duty to stop you!"
"Oh, is that so?" Aizen replied with a small laugh and a knowing smirk. "Are you implying that you don't have an ounce of hatred in your blade, Hitsugaya-kun? After all, out of all of the current captains of the Gotei 13, you surely hate me the most. Or did that hatred go away the second Hinamori-kun showed up alive and well?"
"Ah, you're right, Aizen. My blade is full of hatred. Something truly unworthy of a captain of the Gotei 13." I growled as my spiritual pressure began to rise. "But I'll deal with that later, even if it means resigning as a captain. So for now, know this, Aizen, I didn't come here to fight you…. I CAME HERE TO VIOLENTLY HACK YOU TO PIECES!"
And with that statement, I unleashed my Bankai and charged at him with everything I had. All of the rage and hatred I had felt in the last few months came out all at once as I tried desperately to avenge you. It didn't take long for the other captains to join me in the assault against Aizen.
And then, in the midst of all the fighting, I saw it. An opening. I then charged at Aizen once again, knowing that Hirako would cover me during my assault…. And it worked. I had finally dealt a mortal blow to the man who had caused you so much suffering. I thought I won. I thought I had finally avenged you.
Except, it wasn't him that I stabbed. It was you.
"H-Hina… mori?" I whispered as I stared at you in disbelief. Why are you here? I thought so myself. Where's Aizen!? This can't be happening! There's no way I… I didn't…. No...
I then heard the screams of Kira and Hisagi from down below. Their screams were able to pull me away from my thoughts long enough to remove my sword from your chest and release you from the ice prison I had thought I cast on Aizen.
I still couldn't bring myself to speak. All I could do was cradle you in my shaking arms as I lowered us to the ground.
"S-Shiro… Chan…" you muttered with all the strength you had left. "W-Why…?"
I don't remember what happened next. All I remember is a hoarse scream erupting from my within me as I charged full force at Aizen….
And then everything went black.
The next thing I knew, I was staring at the ceiling of a squad four hospital room. And even in the midst of all the chaos that ensued once one of the fourth division's officers had noticed I woke up, there was only one thought on my mind…
I killed you.