Two days later Cidney's basic training was in full swing. The plane's loading dock was open letting the early morning fresh air in and Ward was having Cidney work the punching bag. After nearly an hour she was really starting to wonder what the point of her doing it was but she kept her mouth shut. Finally Ward allowed her a water break and moved on to teaching her how to disarm someone. After walking her through the steps a few times he stepped back and pointed the gun at her. "Disarm me."

She glared at him. She wasn't fond of him when he slipped into training mode. Grabbing the gun and turning she tried to force the gun from his hand but somewhere along the line, she wasn't sure where, she didn't get the move quite right. He pulled her into his chest and put the gun to her head. She knew it wasn't loaded, it didn't even have a clip in, but she still hated the feeling. "Again." He set himself up. Over and over she tried to get it but it didn't seem to be clicking. Not when her mind was elsewhere.

"Focus Cidney. You need to get this right." Ward was starting to get annoyed. It was like she wasn't even trying.

"What's the point of this? You'll be in there with me I don-"

"You need to be able to protect yourself. Knowing this could make the difference between you having control of the situation or one of us being dead."

"Even if I get the gun Grant I couldn't use it!" she grit her teeth, "I just…I need a break."

She started for the stairs.

"Don't just quit." He grabbed her arm.

"I'm not quitting, Grant. I need a moment" she strained against his hold.

"Cidney come on you're not even trying. You-"

"Grant!" Cidney yelled turning to face him and FitzSimmons both looked over from the work and Cidney was shaking, "I said I need a break." She tore her arm away and ran up the stairs. Ward turned and punched the bag. He went down the loading dock. Air, he needed fresh air…that plane was starting to feel far too crowded. After kissing Cidney that night in the rain things seemed to be growing even more tense between them. Both were holding back, her because he'd left once before and him because he knew he'd have to leave again. Nothing would ever be the same; he'd shattered that hope.

Cidney made her way straight down the ramp and past Ward "Where are you going?"

Anger returned when he didn't receive an answer, she just kept walking. Frustrated he went back to the plane to finish his work out. After getting cleaned up he discovered that Cidney still hadn't come back.

"It's too early for her shop to be open," reasoned Skye "Want me to track her phone?"

Ward hated his answer, "Do it."

Skye had her location in a matter of seconds, "She's at a cemetery."

Ward gave her a puzzled look but headed directly to Cidney's location.

…..

Cidney knelt in front of a small headstone and ran her hand over it clearing away debris. "I'm sorry I've been away so long, champ." She took away the flowers that'd long since faded, "Mamas here now." She placed fresh flowers on the grave of her son.

She sat there quietly for a long time and was only disturbed when she heard footsteps behind her. Turning she saw Ward standing there.

"Are you alright?" He sat beside her and looked at the stone. Daniel Champion Allan beloved son February 3 2009- June 15, 2011. Reading the dates his brain starting running a million miles a minute. "Was he?" he couldn't finish the sentence.

Cidney nodded, "He was just like you. In everything really…he was quiet but I could tell he was always taking in everything around him…. very sneaky too. Scared me when we played hide and seek for the first time. Loved it when I told him stories or read to him. Never enjoyed playing with the kids his age; he liked following the older boys. There was a church that helped me for a while…there was a group of boys around 16 and 17 that would help me around the apartment… fixed things the landlord wouldn't. Watch Danny. They were always so good to him."

He stared at the grave blankly, "What happened?"

She steadied herself; "Almost two years ago I took Danny to the beach for the first time. Mr. Wilson had me borrow his car since my van broke down that morning…and I didn't want to disappoint Danny. He'd been babbling about the beach for days after I told him" Tears streamed down her face, "We were driving home…just twenty minutes…twenty more minutes till we'd be home and we got hit. A drunk driver ran a red light and hit the driver's side. Most of the impact was on the back of the car. He… his little body." She was barely getting the words out and her voice trembled. "There was so much blood…I barely recognized him…my poor little baby. We'd never of been driving that night if I'd just waited to take him to the beach." Sobs wracked her body and Ward hugged her tightly. His jaw was clenched and his eyes full of tears.

"It wasn't your fault. You can't blame yourself." His voice was rough with grief for a child he never knew.

He continued to hold her till her sobs changed to sniffles and the sniffles turned to deep breaths she used to calm down. She pulled away and wiped her red eyes, "I was trying to figure out a way to tell you. I didn't want it to be like this."

"No…I'm glad you told me about him." His voice quavered.

Reaching into her bag she pulled out a picture and handed it to Ward.

Cidney was holding Danny in front of her smiling brightly and Danny's attention was directed at a flower he was was reaching for outside of his mother's shop. "He was eighteen months when I opened the shop."

Ward stared at the picture and a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. Danny looked just like him except he had his mother's eyes. "Did you know yet? When I left?"

She shook her head, "I didn't know until July. Two months pregnant and I thought I was just getting fat." She choked out a laugh.

"You? Never." He gently grazed his hand over her stomach. "Could I see more pictures of him sometime?"

After checking her watch she kissed her fingertips and pressed them to the headstone. Taking Ward's hand she led him away from the small grave.

Once arriving at her apartment she pulled a wooden box from a shelf, motioning Ward to join her on the couch they sat and sifted through pictures. Cidney loved photos which gave Ward the chance to see his son at all stages of life.

"I have most of them backed up on my computer and on a hard drive…if there are any you want copies of I can get them printed for you."

If he was being honest he wanted to have all of them. But even more than that he wished these pictures of memories were actual memories for him. Sorting through the pictures he picked out five he liked the most, the first one was of Danny at two years drowning in a sweatshirt that Ward recognized as one that Cidney had stolen from him about six years ago. He was holding his mother's old glasses up to his face and squinting through them. The second was of him and Cidney in the hospital after he was born, her hair was thrown up in a bun and she wore a huge smile as he was snuggled against her chest. In the third picture Danny sat on the counter in the flower shop holding a carnation out to his mother. His eyes were wide with delight in the fourth as he sat in his mother's lap tasting her ice cream cone at the age of eighteen months. The fifth was his favorite. Danny held Cidney's face between his tiny hands and his lips were pressed against the tip of her nose.

"You two looked happy together." His voice laced with regret.

"He was my sunshine. There were times it was hard to look at him…it was almost painful how much he was like you…but he was a good thing that came out of all that pain."

"You're the strongest person I know." She pursed her lips at him.

"I'm not strong. Some days I feel like I'm barely hanging on…sometimes I don't even know what I'm hanging on to. Besides strong people don't have panic attacks when they see their ex."

"I don't think it's everyday people find out their father figure works with bad guys, sees and has to work with their ex, or finds out they'll have to relocate. You've handled a lot this past week and you've handled it well. I mean that. Queens to you."

She gave him a small smile "I'm sorry I stormed out during training."

"I should have taken it easier on you. You're not an agent nor are you trying to become one. I'm sorry I went to far."

"You didn't. It was just getting overwhelming. When you pressed the gun to my head I…I knew you wouldn't hurt me but…it just made it all so real and I pictured Wilson holding a gun to my head…and I just…"

"Hey," he cupped her face; "I'm not letting anything happen to you in there, okay? I will protect you. And part of protecting you is making sure you can keep yourself safe for when I'm not right next to you."

"Grant I still can't…I couldn't shoot anyone."

"You don't have to. Taking the gun is just to make sure you're in control of the situation. You've always been a confident person. So confident I believe you even when you don't have a clue what you're talking about. The point is you just have to be confident enough to make them think you'll use it. Control the situation until I can get to you."