Chapter 5: Slow Day with the Master of Shadows

'I have this problem', he says, and you try to listen with a high-level poker face and try not to look at him while still pretending to look at him, however that works.

'It's like, I will eat a muffin, right?' You nod. ' And I think okay that is the end of it I got food I'm good. But no. I want another muffin. And when I eat that one I then want to eat another.'

'It's just really good you know. I can't stop. And that's not really a problem except I'm actually almost eating up my entire League allowance on your muffins exclusively.'

You nod in sympathy and bite your lips. You find it ridiculous that Zed could burn that much money on Sinful Succulence goods, but out of respect and a little fear you decide to humour the man.

'It's nice', Zed says and drop a fat twenty dollars note in your Poro tip jar without looking, 'I don't really know what I am trying to accomplish here telling you all this; I'm just going to buy more and eat them anyways.'

You reach for a jar of cookies, the normal type- no special fillings, besides obviously being made with copious amounts of sugar and genuine love. You take one and give it to the man across the counter, and he gratefully accepts it.

'On the house', you say and rub your already clean hands on the front of your apron.

Since he could not eat through his mask, Zed just held his cookie in his hand and stood there looking at you awkwardly.

You try not to stare at his Pentakill black t-shirt and khaki pants. And lack of any shuriken. And his sandals. Off the rift and outside of Ionia the Master of Shadows did not dorn his armored garb. Right now, he looked like a dad. You save yourself from further awkwardness by veering your thoughts away from Daddy Zed holding Baby Akali and Baby Shen by the hands while Kitty Kennen crawled onto his head.

'So... uh... how's Morg doing?', he asks. His facial features were impossible to tell, but you dared guess he was just as awkward as you.

Before you can think of something to say, your boss yells from the back.

'Still kicking!'

The silence is stifling. You wish something would happen. Like. If Jinx would just come in guns blazing or something like that.

'Ah. Good', he mutters as he begins retreating to the door. He wave half-heartedly and say goodbye.

You wave back as you do your best stonewalling impression; it is all you can do not to burst out in giggles.

The chimes signal his departure and you let out a breath you did not know you were holding as you leaned against the counter top.

Your gaze falls on a plastic bag in front of you and you slap your forehead as you realise how dumb you were.

Grabbing it and hot-heeling it out the door, you chase after the Master of Shadows and thank the gods you wore shoes to work and not heels.

'Mr. Zed! Your muffins!', you yell as you catch up.