Shakily, Lena stands. Kara's gaze drifts to her hands, covered in blood. Her brother's blood. Lena doesn't seem to notice, or she doesn't care. She walks over to the control panel and presses on a button. Immediately, the green glow of the room disappears and Kara feels a surge of power coming from deep within her. She knows she won't be at full strength until she gets out of the bunker, but she already feels much better.
She gets up, a bit clumsily, and slowly closes the distance between her and Lena. Lena hasn't moved, perhaps unable to face her dead brother lying on the ground. She waits until Kara stands behind her before she speaks.
"I'm sorry. For taking so long to shoot him. I followed you here but…"
She trails off and Kara puts a hand on her shoulder.
"It's okay. You don't have to explain."
"I was paralyzed. Seeing him again, like this… It was harder than I expected."
"I understand, Lena. I'm not judging you."
"When the lights went out, I was right next to the room where the circuit breaker is. I heard him move so I waited until I was sure he was gone, then I turned them back on. There were gunshots."
"Alex got shot. She's okay though."
Lena nods feebly, and she turns slightly on her heels so that she can see Kara from the corner of her eyes but not Lex's body.
"I grabbed the gun when I could, but I froze. I'm so sorry."
"Don't—"
"He was about to kill you, Kara. I should have shot him sooner."
It's wrong, Kara thinks, that Lena blames herself so much when she's just saved her life.
"Please," she says, "don't do this. I'm fine. The bruises on my neck will fade in no time; you know that."
The pounding on the wall is relentless and Kara sighs, knowing that she can't be alone with Lena right now, not with everyone outside worried for their safety. Reluctantly, she brushes past Lena and pushes the button Lex had. The wall lowers immediately, and Kara barely has time to turn around before a strong pair of arms engulfs her in a tight hug.
"Kara! Oh Kara, I was so scared!"
Kal-El is frantic; he looks at her with his hands on her cheeks, and then hugs her again. Kara lets him, hugs back a little. She still doesn't feel like herself, and Lena's still standing there, looking anywhere but at the dead man on the floor, a few feet away. Kara's heart breaks for her.
The DEO agents swarm the place, guns drawn but holstered quickly once they clear the room. Kara does her best to tune them out. Superman finally seems to realize who's standing next to them and his surprise is evident.
"Miss Luthor," he says solemnly.
Kara notices how soft his tone is, as if he is afraid of Lena's reaction, perhaps afraid to have her lash out at him. Lena does none of that. She nods once at him to acknowledge his presence and his words, but doesn't speak. It's easy to imagine that Lena doesn't trust herself to speak right now.
As if on autopilot, Kara takes Lena's hand in hers and slowly but determinedly drags her out of the room, away from Lex, from the blood and the smell of death. Lena lets her, offers no resistance. Clark doesn't follow. He seems to understand. Right before they disappear in the hallway, Kara sees him approaching Lex's body and she knows Clark needs to confront his demons—his demon—one last time. The DEO agents all step away when Superman stands at Lex's side, looking down at him.
Then they're alone; it's just the two of them and Kara sees the way Lena stares at her bloody hands, shaking slightly. She pulls her into a hug, because what else can she do? Is there anything she can say? Kara doesn't think so.
She tugs Lena closer, until their bodies press together, and she wraps her arms around her and squeezes as hard as she can without hurting her. For a moment, Lena stands frozen and Kara wonders if she's overstepping and if Lena needs space rather than a hug. But then Lena places her hands on Kara's back, on her red cape. It's a tentative touch, as if she's not sure she should, and Kara strokes Lena's own back to let her know it's okay. Only then does Lena allow herself to fully sink into the embrace.
When they emerge out of the bunker a dozen of minutes later, Kara's fingers are firmly entwined with Lena and she stares down any DEO agent looking at them a bit too long. They don't seem surprised to see Lena, merely curious, and Kara deduces that they must have been briefed by J'onn on their way to the rescue. She doesn't want to think too much ahead, to think about what awaits them—Lena—now that Lex is dead.
Lena stays by her side while Kara checks on Alex, who's barking out orders even from her stretcher.
"I'm fine," Alex says immediately. "How are you two?"
She makes a point to look at both her sister and Lena when she asks, and Kara wants to hug her for being so considerate.
"We're… okay. Alive."
Alex's phone vibrates in her hand and Kara has enough time to see that it's Maggie calling, so she kisses her sister on the cheek and pulls Lena away, now searching for Mon-El. They find James instead, whose suit is now off. He is on a stretcher too, but sitting on it and there are bandages around his legs.
"James," Kara breathes in relief.
He looks somber and a feeling of dread creeps up on Kara.
"Mon-El?"
"They had a chopper come and get him. He's lost a lot of blood. I don't know any more than that."
"Hey. It's not your fault, Jimmy."
"I was ahead of him. I'm the one who crossed the motion sensor first."
Kara can't find anything else to say, so she offers a comforting hand on his shoulder and waits until he places his own on top of hers. When Kara looks back, Lena has wandered off on her own, a few feet away.
"How is she," James asks.
"Not good. I'm not sure. She saved my life, but at what cost for her?"
"Go," James nudges her in Lena's direction. "She needs you more than I do."
She shoots him a thankful smile and joins Lena, who is looking at the endless desert in front of her.
"Lex taught me how to shoot a gun," Lena utters; her voice raspy but hollow. "He made sure I was a good shot. Said the Luthors had a lot of enemies and he wanted me to be able to defend myself. How ironic."
Tragic is the word that comes to Kara's mind, but she remains quiet.
"What will Lillian think of it; I wonder," Lena muses. "Maybe I'll have her to worry about now. Maybe she'll succeed where Lex failed."
"Don't say that," Kara protests immediately. "Nothing's going to happen to you."
Lena bites back a scathing remark and she does a poor job at hiding it because Kara notices. Kara notices everything about her. She understands why, now. After everything that's happened to them; Kara understands her feelings for the other woman.
"Kara," a voice calls softly from behind them.
She looks over her shoulder at J'onn.
"We're heading back to the jets. There are Jeeps to drive us there."
"Alright. We'll be right there. Just… give us a minute."
He nods wisely and walks away without another word. Lena finally decides to face Kara and she sighs tiredly.
"Let's go then," she says.
"We don't have to ride with them. I can fly us to the jet. If… I mean if you want to be alone for a little while."
Lena is silent, considering Kara's offer. She looks exhausted and more fragile than Kara's ever seen her. She wishes she could just take the pain away. An idea forms in her mind and she hopes Lena will agree to it.
"Or I could take us anywhere you want. We'll give our statements later; the DEO will wait for us. If you want to go home…"
Lena doesn't look thrilled at the suggestion.
"… or anywhere else, really. I can fly you there."
To her surprise, it's Lena who initiates a hug this time. She throws herself in Kara's arms and holds her so tightly that Kara thinks she'd bruise if she were human.
"Please take me away," Lena whispers against her collarbone.
Kara still doesn't know where exactly but she strokes Lena's hair gently and murmurs her approbation in her ear. She secures her arms around Lena's waist and takes off in the air. She flies slowly over J'onn until he looks up and, with a hand gesture, he signals his understanding.
Kara flies as fast as she can with a human in her arms.
When their feet touch the ground, Lena looks around her and then back at Kara, surprised.
"You took us to your apartment?"
"Hum, yeah. I couldn't really think of another place on the spot so… I figured we could get some rest and then… decide. Also, we should probably shower. I mean—I don't mean we should it together, of course, I—you know what I mean."
"Yes, Kara, I know."
Lena's voice is soft but devoid of the kind of teasing she's recently decided to do to make Kara blush. Kara, for once, wishes Lena would make fun of her.
"So… you know where the bathroom is. I'll get you some clothes you can change into."
"Thank you."
Lena's in the bathroom for a long time, and it takes all of Kara's willpower to not listen in, because she's pretty sure that Lena is crying and she wants to give her some privacy for that. Instead, she focuses on her Supergirl outfit, which she took off to clean. There are spatters of blood on it; Lex's blood. Kara scrubs and scrubs until she's satisfied that she got all of it.
After that, she prepares some healthy snacks for Lena, hoping that the other woman will eat but knowing it's a long shot. Who would be able to eat after such a traumatic event?
Lena emerges from the bathroom a few minutes later in the clothes Kara's provided her with. Her hair is wet and her eyes are red from the crying and Kara knows better than to point it out. Her eyes skim briefly over Lena who is wearing sweatpants and a hoodie with kittens sewn on it. If it wasn't for the tragic events of earlier; Kara would tell her she looks cute.
Instead, she gestures awkwardly toward the kitchen table.
"In case you want to eat something. Hum, I'm going to… I'm going to take a shower now. You can switch on the TV or—or… maybe you want to lie down? So there's either the couch or my bed. You've been in my bed before; you remember where it is…"
She stops herself when she realizes she's rambling. Lena offers her a small smile, arms hugging her own body.
"Right. Well, I won't be long," Kara says as she walks past Lena and heads toward the bathroom.
"Thank you, Kara," Lena mutters, knowing that Supergirl will hear her.
"You're welcome."
Lena is watching the news when Kara leaves the bathroom about fifteen minutes later. She's biting her bottom lip nervously and Kara approaches her carefully before sitting next to her on the couch. She knows what Lena is expecting to see, but she also knows that it is a waste of her time.
"The DEO won't tell anyone about Lex before tomorrow. Maybe the FBI."
"They'll be looking for me."
"Probably," Kara admits.
Gently, she pries the remote from Lena's hand and turns off the TV. Lena doesn't protest but she sighs tiredly.
"We can sleep," Kara suggests. "We should rest, at least."
"I doubt I'll be able to sleep."
It doesn't surprise Kara in the least. After the explosion at L-Corp, sleep had eluded her as well, for a long time. The thought of having been unable to save those people and to protect Lena from her brother had eaten away at her until she'd exploded and almost killed a man. She remembers it all too well.
"Come. Lie with me anyway," she says as she gets up and extends her hand.
Lena looks at it for a couple of seconds then takes it and lets herself be led to the bedroom. She slips under the sheet and blanket and, once Kara has done the same, she scoots closer to her. Then she stops herself, and looks up at Kara with a question in her eyes. Kara understands; she also understands that Lena's pride won't allow her to ask what she wants so Kara beats her to it.
"You know, I'm kind of a koala in my sleep. So uh, I'll probably end up snoring in your ear; sorry about that. But it's been a rough day and I'm feeling drowsy."
"Are you going somewhere with that," Lena cuts her off, no bite in her tone but perhaps a tinge of amusement.
"Can we cuddle," Kara blurts out.
Great, not smooth at all, just great, she mentally slaps herself. But it was the point she was trying to reach and she knows that's what Lena was afraid to ask so she doesn't feel too bad about her bluntness. Lena doesn't give her a verbal reply. No, she just lies on her side and rests her head on Kara's shoulder, an arm wrapped around Kara's waist. Her nose presses lightly against Kara's neck; a cold touch against warm skin that Kara more than welcomes. She lets her own arm hug Lena, holding her close. It takes a while for Lena to relax; Kara feels it when it happens, when Lena's body sinks fully into her and into the mattress, when she inhales and exhales deeply.
"I'm sorry," Kara breaks the silence.
"You have nothing to be sorry for," is Lena's immediate response.
"I'm sorry you lost your brother," she clarifies.
"I lost him a long time ago. The man I… The man I killed today was a mere shadow of him."
"I know."
In the darkness of the room, talking about this becomes easier.
"I miss him," Lena confesses. "I miss him so much."
Her voice breaks at the end, and Kara's other arm wraps around Lena's back as well.
"Tell me about him," she whispers. "I want to know who he was."
Lena obliges her. She tells Kara about the teddy bear Lex gave her when they met for the first time, about him showing her the family tree and recounting funny stories about everyone on it. She tells Kara about their inside jokes and secrets, about Lex teaching her how to ride a horse during a trip to the family ranch. Kara doesn't interrupt her. She listens attentively, absent-mindedly caressing Lena's hair and back, encouraging her to recall her good memories with her brother. Kara thinks of Alex and of how she'd deal if she were to ever lose her. The thought alone terrifies her.
She hugs Lena more tightly when the Luthor's voice cracks. Kara doesn't acknowledge the wetness she feels on her collarbone, afraid that Lena will pull away if she says anything about her crying. She simply lets the other woman speak, unperturbed by the sobs Lena swallows back.
Lena talks for almost two hours and when she stops, perhaps thinking that Kara has fallen asleep, Kara places a kiss on top of her head.
"He was a good brother," she says simply.
She feels Lena nod against her neck.
They fall asleep shortly after that, with Kara's arms still holding Lena against her. They don't let go of her through the night, and Kara wakes up several times to make sure Lena is not having a nightmare. She listens to the sound of Lena's heartbeat and lets it lull her back to sleep every time. She whispers soothing words in Lena's ear when the other woman mumbles in her sleep.
If she spends more time watching over Lena than sleeping, Kara doesn't care. Around five in the morning, Lena turns in her arms and Kara follows so that her forehead rests against the back of Lena's head. She wonders if this is how they'd come to cuddling the previous night—which seems like forever ago—and falls back asleep with that thought in her mind.
When she wakes up in the morning, the bed is cold and Lena is gone.