Chapter 18: Lavender's Blue

Lavender's Blue

Dilly dilly

Lavender's Green

When I am King

Dilly dilly

You Shall Be Queen.

Racheal stretched out beside John on his bed and looked at him. He adjusted his position to her and looked over to be certain he was not hogging up the area.

"You need a bigger bed." She teased.

"I think mom did that on purpose to keep you out of it."

She shrugged. "Always have my bed if need be."

He smiled at that.

She settled in closer to him and laid her head against his right shoulder. He looked down at her and tried to organize his thoughts.

"Rache?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you love me?"

She looked up at him to see if he was joking. "Yes, of course."

He bit his lip. "Don't take this the wrong way, Rache but I want to be sure of some things. I want to know if we're on the same page."

She frowned. "Are you doubting me?"

"Not doubting. I want to be certain that you feel about me the way I feel about you."

Racheal glared at him, feeling as if he was making her a joke.

"Are you breaking it off with me?" She almost yelled.

"No, I'm actually thinking about long term." He said slowly.

It took her a moment to get his meaning. "Oh." She nearly whispered.

"Yeah." He said slowly. "I want to know if we have a shot at being more. I want to talk to you, not as John Connor but just as John."

"Ok, I can handle that then."

He took a deep breath. "Just imagine for a minute that you're still Racheal Sanders, the girl that I met at school and I'm just another classmate. There's no Skynet, no terminators, no future war. None of that exists, life is going the way it's supposed to go. What do you want to do with your life?"

She looked at him and pondered for a moment, reaching deep inside for the girl she was a few months back; Somewhat surprised to find the girl still there under the surface. She thought about what her ambitions used to be before John Connor.

"I want to own an art studio. Go to an art school and study under the best, paint in my spare time all the while. I'd like to open my own studio and work for other companies to pay the bills while I fill museums with my work."

He smiled at her. "I think that sounds like a good dream."

"What about you?"

John shook his head. "I never got the chance to consider it so I never have before. No hobbies or skills to speak of."

"Do you love me?" She asked, reaching for her turn.

"More than anything."

"Did you love me before or after we started sleeping together?"

John frowned at looked at her. "I loved you before, I just loved you deeper after we became lovers."

She nodded, finding herself agreeing to his statement.

"Do you want to get married?" Racheal asked quietly.

John seemed to think on it. "Yeah, I do. I think we make a great team both now and in the future. We go well together but not as well apart. "

"Do you..want kids?"

He looked at her again and smiled. "I think that's a certain thing, Racheal. With the coming war and lack of birth control, I'm certain we will have an accident along the way."

She sighed. "I meant, "Do you want to try on purpose to have them? Forget about the future war, remember?"

"Yeah, I think I'd like to have a kid or two."

"Do you want kids with me?"

He smirked. " A blue eyed, red haired kid calling the shots, sure why not?"

"I'm serious."

"Yes, of course I do. Who else would I be with?"

It was her turn to smirk. "You might fall in love with someone else, you might cheat."

His face darkened. "I would never do that. A commitment is a commitment; it's for life, Rache."

Racheal remained silent.

After a few moments of awkward silence, John spoke up. "How many children do you want?"

"I don't know."

"Come on, you had to have been thinking about it at some point in your life, everyone does."

"I had planned three whenever I had thought about it. Three is a good number."

John sighed. "I thought about it some. If the future happens, I was thinking of only one since it would be hard to keep up with many. More if it doesn't happen. "

"Boy or girl?"

"Doesn't matter. I vote we quit after her though." He said and nodded in the direction of Destiny's room.

"Agreed."

"So that's two then, maybe three."

She laughed. "I suppose so."

"What about sex?"

She slowly rolled her eyes. "John, you get enough."

He smirked. "Well, I was hoping.."

He stopped his sentence short when she punched his arm.

"Just. I promise that I won't love anyone but you. Can you promise the same?"

She smiled at him and kissed his lips. "No one but you, Jo Jo, I promise."

June 18th, 2010

John woke up bright and early as he always did thanks to Tyler and his training. At least that was what he had called it. Training. In John's mind, it was not training but torture. He wondered to himself if Sarah had convinced Tyler to be especially hard on him as payback for slacking off the past few years. She had promised to make it difficult if John had not followed through on their agreement but so far he had. Perhaps she started in early as another lesson. John quickly climbed out of bed and rolled off onto the floor. He threw on some clothes and made it out the door just as Tyler was tying the laces on his shoes and headed out himself. John lined up next to Destiny who was currently stretching out on the grass. "Sup?" He asked. She glanced at him like she was wondering why or how he thought he was worthy enough to talk to her. He rolled his eyes in response.

Tyler had sent him and Destiny on a three mile run down the street barking orders at them to run faster and keep up. John panted and struggled to keep pace with Destiny who was clearly enjoying her ability to outrun him.

"Laugh..it..up." He wheezed.

"I am." She smirked and zipped past him, jumping over the next hurdle and kept going. John slowed down till he felt Tyler's presence behind. "Move it, kid. The tin cans can catch you easily at this pace." John gritted his teeth and pushed himself onwards.

After a grueling day of working with Tyler, John was happy to be back at home to rest. He hurried in through the back door, making certain that Sarah saw how tired and sweaty he was from his run. Last thing he needed was for her to think he wasn't putting in the work, especially for the plans he had today. After a quick shower, he changed into some casual clothes and went to go find Racheal.

He found her still asleep in her room and poked her nose. She silently swatted at him. She opened her eyes when he started laughing at her and hit him with a pillow. He noticed her gaze and smiled. "Hey, birthday girl. Wanna have some fun?"

She perked up and lifted her head off her pillow."What did you have in mind?"

"Get dressed and you'll see."

About an hour later, Racheal emerged in a matching tank and skirt combo. She had obviously taken more time on herself than usual. Her hair was curled rather than blown dry and her makeup was a bit more heavy than the usual dab of mascara and lip gloss. She hurried down the stairs to the living room where John waited. "Okay, let's go." She motioned towards the door.

"Go where?" Sarah demanded as she walked in from the kitchen. "Shit."

Destiny chose that moment to walk past the doorway leading from the living room to the kitchen. She smirked at John and mouthed "Busted" before walking on. John rolled his eyes and took a deep breath. "We were planning on going out to see a movie, mom."

"John, we've talked about this."

"Yeah, we have. I want a life and you want to keep me on lock-down."

"John." Sarah snapped.

"Look, mom, I get it. Can't we just go out anyway for a little while if we take someone with us?"

"Fine. Take Cameron with you."

"Aw come on, mom. How about Racheal?"

"No, take Tyler."

"Derek?"

"No, he isn't capable of keeping you safe."

"Amy then."

"Fine."

Laughter came from a nearby doorway. John and Racheal turned to see Amy standing there with a smug look on her face and the keys in her hand. "So, what movie are we going to see?"

John rolled his eyes and he climbed into the jeep with Racheal. Amy hopped into the driver's seat and they took off down the road. "So, where are we really going, John?" Racheal asked.

He smirked at her. "It's a surprise. You'll have to wait and see."

After some time driving away from the city, Amy pulled the jeep into a small gravel driveway behind what was once an old barn. Amy got out first and surveyed the area before motioning to John that it was safe. Quickly, he got out and helped Racheal. He gave Amy a conspiring look before grabbing Racheal's hand and tugging her in the direction of the old barn.

"Come on and close your eyes." He said and pulled her along gently through the opening of the barn and stopped her once they reached the end.

"Open your eyes, Rache."

She did and squealed loudly. In front of her was a large field of lavender, stretching on all sides as far as the eye could see with a single tree marking its center. She turned to look at John who was laughing. "I love lavender." Racheal smiled.

John grinned."I know, you told me. Lots of times." He laughed. Racheal playfully punched his shoulder.

"Hey!." He cried. "I'll get you for that."

Racheal grinned and walked backwards into the field."You'll have to catch me first." She smirked and took off into the field, gulping down the delicious scent of lavender baked by the hot summer sun.

John laughed and chased after her.

Even with his training with Tyler and Destiny, John still struggled to catch her. Racheal ran towards a single tree that marked the center of the field. "Perfect." John thought. "Right where I want you."

He waited until she made her way around the tree and then he grabbed her as she went to race past him. He wrapped his arm around her waist as she struggled to break free. He pulled her down on the fleece blanket that had been spread out between the tree and the field. He laid her down on the blanket, quickly climbing on top of her and began kissing her. He kissed her lips and her jawline before showering her neck and moving to the exposed skin peeking through her low cut shirt. Racheal giggled and began to moan under the attention. John laughed and made certain her eyes were closed as he pulled out a red rose hiding by the field. He kissed her once more on the lips and placed the flower by the side of her face. As he had hoped, she opened her eyes to it when he pulled his mouth from hers.

She traced the stem of it with her finger and breathed in its scent.

"So I was thinking, Rache." John began.

"Yeah?"

"We'll, when we moved before this last time. We all changed our name to "Sanders". So, it's kinda like I took your name." John laughed and used his hand to guide Racheal's fingers inside the coils of the rose.

She playfully rolled her eyes at him but frowned when she felt something hard inside the head of the flower. John knew from the look on her face that she had found it. He smirked. "I was thinking, since I took your name, that maybe ...you might take mine."

The realization hit her as soon as she pulled the hard item from the rose, revealing it to be a simple silver ring with a large round cut diamond in the center. She looked at him and he smiled gently at her. "Racheal Alexandra Sanders, will you marry me?"

She grinned. "Yes."

John grinned and kissed her passionately while slipping the ring on her left hand. Racheal giggled as he showered her face and neck with kisses, the sensation of his gentle touches tickling her. "Ready for your birthday gift?"

She frowned slightly. "I thought this trip, the ring-"

"Still a piece to go." John laughed and in one fluid motion, slipped his hand under her skirt and pulled her panties off.

"Oh really?" She asked while he pulled her clothes off one piece at a time.

"Yup" He answered simply and settled between her legs. He hesitated for a moment before dragging his tongue across her sensitive folds. The moan she uttered would have made a whore blush as she ran her right hand though his hair and pressed him closer.

Sarah checked the time and paced the kitchen, glaring at the driveway and dialed her phone. "Adams, where the he

ll are you?"

Rainwater dripped from John's soaked hair onto Racheal's neck. They had abandoned their clothing as the clouds pulled together and began to thunder. The heavy scent of rain mixed with the lavender and created an intense aroma. John roughly rubbed himself against while sucking hard at her breasts."Do it, John." Racheal moaned. He pulled his mouth from her nipple and reached his arms around her back as he began jerking uncontrollably. An intense feeling of warmth and wetness burned at Racheal's belly despite the rain. John rolled off of her when he was done and laid beside her. "I owe you a bath." He said as he returned began sucking at her other breast.

Racheal closed her eyes and focused on her other senses. She listened to the heavy rainfall, feeling it cascade down her body. She felt the soggy blanket beneath her, the feeling of heat on her belly from John's seed and the soft tugging at her nipple from his lips. She heard the soft footfalls of someone approaching and despite her inner warning, she chose to ignore it. "Leave, Adams." John muttered as he pulled Racheal closer.

"Yes, Sarah. They're with me. I'm looking right at them both right now. Yes, we'll be home soon. Sure, you can talk to John."

John rolled his eyes at Amy as he and Racheal both sat up and began caressing each other. Racheal ran her hands over his chest as he squeezed her breasts.

Amy smirked and tossed the phone at him.

He glared at her as he caught it and held it to his ear. "Hi, Mom. What's up?"

"Where the hell are you?!" She demanded.

"Got a little sidetracked, Mom. Everything's fine."

"Get home now!"

"We're on our way." He said as he clicked the phone shut and tossed it back to Amy.

Amy smirked and tossed them their clothes from under the tree. "Time to go, horn-dog."

Sarah paced in the living room and glared out the window down the driveway. They were late. Every time she allowed John to go out of the house, he always returned late. Less than a year left before Judgment Day and she was on high alert. She kept focused on the coming future and stopping it. She allowed John out to be normal as much as she could with the present danger, just to allow him to have breathing room. As time edged closer, tensions ran higher. They could all use a break. The teenagers were neck n neck with the adults and as of late, they were at each other's throats. The crunch of gravel snapped her attention back to the present and she looked out the window to see the jeep pull into the driveway.

Amy walked in a few moments later with John and Racheal behind her. "You should have been home two hours ago, John Connor."

"Sorry, mom. We were busy."

"Doing what?"

"Getting engaged. I asked her and she said yes." John blurted out.

Racheal froze with her hand on the banister of the staircase. She dare not turn around. She did not need her eyes to hear Sarah's frustrated grunt. Thankfully, that was all she did. A clicking against the floor and Racheal knew Sarah was coming over to the staircase to go to her room. She stayed rooted to the floor and let Sarah pass her by, keeping her eyes to the floor as to not face her.

She felt John walk up next to her and place his hand on her shoulder. Suddenly she felt as if she could breathe again. "She didn't start yelling."

"It's an improvement."

"Yeah, she knew you'd ask?"

"We had talked about it a little while ago. My original plan was Vegas but she would have sent someone after us. Thought it was better to go ahead and be out with it. Not fair to her to really exclude her even if she doesn't really support it."

"She doesn't support it or doesn't support me and you?"

"Both."

She nodded and continued to climb the stairs with John following behind her. He quickly pulled her into his room and laid her down on bed, kissing her neck. She giggled and he quickly climbed on top of her, kissing her face and neck. He moved his arms to push back her hair as he kept kissing her lips, drawing small moans from her.

"John Connor, that's enough." His mother's voice boomed from outside the door. He pulled away from Racheal and looked towards the doorway at his mother. He really wished she allowed closed doors.

He sat at the edge of the bed, away from Racheal and looked at her. "What?"

"You need some time away from her. If you are that bored then perhaps you need more training. The C4 will not build itself."

He sighed defeated and got up. Walking past Sarah, he went downstairs and set up his makeshift shop on the table.

Sarah turned back to look at Racheal who had sat up on John's bedside. "Your older self has been looking for you. If you're going to stay here with us, the least you can do is train."

Racheal bit back a remark and simply got up, heading for the door. Sarah moved over to the right side of the door frame and grabbed Racheal's left hand , stopping her as she went to leave the room. Sarah examined the new ring of Racheal's left ring finger closely. Saying nothing, she let go of Racheal's hand and walked downstairs.

Racheal paused for a moment and walked into the bedroom her future self shared with Destiny. Her older self looked up. "You're late."

The younger Racheal bit her lip.

"Happy Birthday." She and her future self blurted out to each other simultaneously.

They both laughed and replied "Thank you."

Destiny sat on the floor and disassembled one of Sarah's shotguns.

"How was it?" The older Racheal asked.

"Great. We were out to a lavender field."

"And?"

"Ya know, played around, ran through it and picked some.. Shoot. I forgot the bunch in the car."

"Ah, so it was eventful then."

Racheal looked like she was about to burst and grinned while Destiny groaned with disgust. The younger Racheal held out her left hand to her future self who simply nodded. "Right on schedule."

The older Racheal examined the extended hand. "Solitaire diamond, platinum ring looks like. What is it? Two carat diamond?. "

The girl merely shrugged. "I didn't ask...How did you?"

The woman let go of Racheal's hand and waved the question aside. "John has excellent taste in rings. It's the same design as the one my John gave me. "

"Isn't it the same ring?"

"Yes, I suppose so."

"Did you tell him about yours?"

"No, I only mentioned what size to get, I wanted him to choose it. T'was curious to see if he'd choose the same ring."

The young girl grinned to herself. "I'm getting married."

Her older self laughed and looked at her own makeshift wedding band. She felt a stab of pain go through her when she remembered her original bridal set was in the future with John. She was forced to leave it behind. She shrugged to herself. Rings were only metal and stone. Her daughter's life was more important. "Yes, you are, Racheal."

The two Racheals hugged as the older whispered "Congratulations."

Destiny rolled her eyes and finished her project of pulling the guns apart. "Mom, I'm done."

"Great. You and Racheal can put them back together again."

"Then why did I pull them apart?"

"So you can put them together again under duress while being timed. The faster you can do it, the quicker you can save your own life."

Destiny snorted. "Right, or I could just call for Tyler or TJ or Cameron. It's their job to save me."

Quicker than she could blink, Racheal walked over and gripped her shoulders firmly, pinning her against the wall. "Destiny Sarah Connor, don't you ever say that! Don't you ever think that!" Racheal yelled.

Destiny glared at the floor. "Look at me! … Look at me!" Racheal repeated, giving her shoulders a firm shake.

She cupped her hand around Destiny's chin and forced her to meet her mother's eyes. "You cannot depend on someone to save your life. Yes, it may be their job but things always happen. TJ could die; Tyler could be surrounded by machines and unable to get to you. Cameron is assigned to John's safety; she will choose to save him over you every time, as she should. If he dies, you die, you know that. Your grandmother will protect you, I will protect you but humans become wounded and they die. Do you remember last time? Tyler was dying to save you; I nearly died to save you and John. The two of us together were almost not enough. The only person you can truly depend on is yourself; you and your skills. Do you understand me?... Do. You. Understand, young lady?'

Destiny looked away and nodded as her mother released her. Without another word, the two teens positioned themselves on the floor in front of the guns as the older Racheal grabbed a stop watch. She clicked the button and nodded to the teens that hurriedly began putting the rifles together. Once assembled, they loaded them, switched the safety off and took aim at an imaginary target on the wall. Racheal clicked the stopwatch off. "One minute and six seconds, Destiny, you are getting rusty. Three minutes and ten seconds for you, Racheal. Not good enough. On my mark, you will unload and disassemble the guns. We will do this again until you are both under a minute. Is that clear? "

"Yes, Mom." Destiny sighed as Racheal nodded.

"What?" She asked.

"Yes, Ma'am." They both corrected.

"Good." She clicked the stopwatch. "Now, go."

John sat at the kitchen table and put together packages of c4. He threaded the copper wires with his needle-nose pliers very carefully. He pretended to not hear his mother come down the stairs and enter the kitchen. "The ring you bought her looks expensive."

John frowned. "It was.. Wait, she showed..? You didn't take it from her did you?"

"No but I was tempted to. How did you get the money for it?"

"I used the credit card trick you showed me. "

"How did you get a credit card? We don't have the new aliases yet."

"I used the last alias."

"John Connor! What were you thinking?"

He put the pliers down and held up his hands in defense. " Wait a minute, mom. Just wait. I covered my tracks "

"Make it quick."

"I ordered the cards from my laptop on an advertisement from campus. My hard drive gets wiped every night so the police won't get anything off of it to connect my computer to the cards or school. Campus had a campaign going at the time I ordered them so the credit card companies were flooded with requests and won't be able to remember me applying, especially since I did it online. Campus had only my name, not my photo. I hacked into the school and erased my records. Classes were so large, the professors don't know me. I sent the credit cards to Charley's house instead of our old address to throw them off of us. Charley checked the cards for tracking devices before he gave them to me, and we drove out to Riverside where I used a payphone to activate them. Then he took me out to a jewelry store in Brea to buy the rings. We made sure to not enter the store at the same time and used hats to help hide us from their security cameras. I pointed them out before we went into the store and we made sure to avoid them picking us up. I hacked into the security system of the store that night and neither Charley nor I were caught on camera. The store had several specials going on that day and they were packed full of people. I doubt if a salesman will remember me by name or face. After I bought the rings, Charley and I drove out to Anaheim. There was still some money left on the cards so I ditched the cards out the window after wiping off my fingerprints. I doubt if anyone but a homeless person will find them. Charley has been throwing his mail and his neighbors', away in a dumpster near Burbank and has reported his mail stolen to the authorities." John took a breath.

"So, lets recap. Computer was wiped, campus records have been wiped, credit cards companies only have my old name and a fake address. Charley has dumped his mail and his neighbor's mail far away from his home or ours and reported the mail stolen so he is blameless. The cards themselves are clean and have been ditched, the store doesn't have me or Charley on camera, the salesman won't remember me, the cards were not connected to any phone of mine... There should be no link between those cards, John Sanders or John Connor."

Sarah fumed but said nothing for a moment. "You brought Charley into this? That was stupid. The FBI will trace the cards to his address, they will interrogate him and watch him for months. We are now out of medical personnel so you better hope that no one ends up seriously injured. We've tossed Charley back into the lion's den and the whole purpose in leaving him was to protect him from us. I haven't done a very good job at keeping him at arm's distance but now you may have just gotten him arrested for assisting a criminal. We have to keep a low profile more than usual. We can't afford to use him regardless of who is hurt or how bad. It may be a year before you can speak to him now. You do understand that?"

John felt his pride vanish as he realized he truly screwed up. He had to remove Charley from his life to save them both. He may cost a member of their crew their life without Charley to intercept and he lost a personal friend in the end due to his own carelessness. He would not be able to invite Charley to his own wedding, letting alone asking him to be his best man, an idea that had rolled around in his head. He felt defeated and sad at the chaos he would cause Charley for his own selfish reasons. Even if Charley was found to not be an accomplice, he would still be watched. Sarah was right.

"You're right, I'm sorry. "

Changing the subject, Sarah looked at him intently. "Is she worth it? Is she worth the risk to you? You would risk Charley's life, possibly everyone's life to put on this charade, you and her. "

"It's not a charade, Mom, it's an engagement. "

Sarah scowled at him. "It's a cry for attention, John and it's a waste of time. We have 307 days until Judgment Day. I have agreed to our deal and I will keep my word but, we are running out of time meanwhile you and that girl want to piss off a day playing dress up."

John grit his teeth. "She's not "that girl", she's my fiancée, Mom and you did agree to our deal, this is part of it. We're not pissing off a day, we're getting married, it's supposed to be special. You are the one who said that stopping Skynet and preventing Judgment Day was our mission but this is our life. She is part of my life now, I love her and you just have to accept that in some way."

Sarah glared at him. "I don't have to accept it, John. I'll allow you to marry her but that's it."

John shook his head as he worked on the C4 packages. "I love her, mom. I'm happy with her, she makes me happy. Why can't that be enough for you? I wanted to go Vegas and get married in a drive-through but I knew you'd send Cam after me to stop me. You'd be mad that I didn't include you which is why I think you don't like her. I thought that if I did a wedding with everyone here then maybe it might make you happy too. Did it ever occur to you that on something this important that maybe I just wanted my mom with me?" He quickly continued before she could cut him off.

"If we fail, I'd like one really good thing to happen before Judgment Day. A good memory that I can turn to when things get bad and people die. Like how you always think of dad , and call for him in your sleep when you're stressed. You rely on his memory to help you get through it. I want Racheal to be my way through the bad; I want a memory of her smiling in a white dress to be what helps me get through."

Sarah remained quiet and stared off into space, a far off look in her eyes told John she was thinking of his father again.

John finished his task with the C4, noting every so often that Sarah did not move or come out of her trance. Maybe she was overcome by sadness or perhaps, just perhaps, he gave her something to think about. It wasn't easy to watch her give in to a moment a weakness and grieve but then again, it was not easy for him to bare his soul and tell her the truth, letting her in after he had spent so many years shutting her out.

John quietly packed the supplies away and put the explosives in their usual hiding places before returning to the kitchen. He slowly walked up to Sarah and gently hugged her to bring her out of her stupor. He felt her stir and lightly hug him back.