Waiting

Gandalf was direct to Thorin that whilst he was still investigating further, both Thorin and Leah would remain there, in the flat. Growling under his breath, Thorin had been pulled back by Leah. She placed her hand on his arm. "Thorin," she said softly. "Let Gandalf do what he needs to do." He looked at her with those beautiful eyes she'd seen so many times in her dreams, and then he nodded his head, trusting her judgement.

"Thank you, my dear," Gandalf said, smiling. "I shall return as soon as I can. Be ready for Fili and Kili also, and then we shall all leave in two days time at the strike of nine."

As Thorin closed the door, Leah could see the deep concern and dread in his face. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"Azog was the one who killed my grandfather...and killed me. He shall stop at nothing if he knows I'm alive. And I fear he'll try to get to you, too. And there's Fili and Kili; none of you are safe. We cannot leave this world knowing that they're here." Thorin hissed. "He is a servant of the Dark One, Leah."

Everything that Thorin was saying was as though it was from a film, but Leah saw the set of his face. No matter how mad all of this sounded, she had no choice but to trust Thorin and follow him. After all, she'd dreamed of him so many times and then he'd come to her. Surely this world he spoke of was real, including the dangers.

"Come and sit down," Leah advised. "Do you want a drink? I'll get you something."

Thorin smiled at her. "Please, my love. Whatever you choose is good enough for me." Straight away as the danger had been pointed out by Gandalf, she'd been there at his side to assist. It was as though she naturally fell into the role of being the one to take away the sting of his frustrations and comfort him, and without even realising she was doing it. She was the warmth, confident and advisor that he needed.

Leah tapped around in his small kitchen, making two mugs of tea. Then she took them both to the coffee table and sat down beside Thorin. "Tell me more about what we got up to," she asked, closing her eyes and placing her head on his shoulder. For a brief second she inhaled the musky scent of him and felt a stir in the pit of her stomach, but pushed it away. "Talk to me."

Thorin took a sip of the tea which Leah had made for him. "What would you like to know exactly?"

Leah laughed. "I thought dwarves loved telling tales long into the night?"

"How would you know that? I thought you knew nothing of dwarves?" Thorin asked, his eyes sparkling with the hope that her memories were at last beginning to make themselves known.

"I don't...but that just came out without me even thinking about it."

"It seems that your memories are returning. Do you remember anything else?"

"I can't consciously make things happen like that. They just happen..."

"I understand. I'm sorry," he said softly, looking into her eyes.

"Don't apologise. I want to know what happened between us, too. You have no idea how much I want to remember, Thorin. But one memory I do have is one I wish I didn't and that's your death. I can't get that out of my head no matter how hard I try. Seeing someone die right in front of you, and especially someone you love."

"But I'm not dead any longer. I'm right here. You heard what Gandalf said. Our bloodline will endure and we'll be rulers together. Do not keep returning to the past; think of our future. We may still have obstacles to overcome, but we will overcome them. I have faith in that," Thorin explained. "For the first time in many years now, things have become clear in front of me. And it's because I have you."

"You know just the right things to turn me on, don't you?" Leah laughed.

"I certainly hope so."

Without even thinking, they both rushed into another kiss. Thorin picked Leah up in his arms and without breaking the kiss took her into the bedroom. With their lips still joined in a highly passionate kiss, he lowered her to the bed. Leah struggled to keep her lips locked with his and unbutton his shirt at the same time. The mind numbing lust she felt mixed with deep, passion fuelled love, spurred her on. She wanted every minute part of him.

"Patience, my love," he whispered, watching her drag at his trousers. "You will wear yourself out before we've even begun." Then he kissed her again and let his lips caress her beck, nuzzling the skin. Her groans were like music to his ears.

"Don't make me wait," Leah said breathlessly. "I don't want to hold on for you any more. I waited long enough." Thorin grinned at her words and began to pull at her clothes, dragging them off as quickly as he could. His beard brushed down her bare skin, tickling her and causing pleasurable pimples to rise on her flesh. Her hands dug into his back and then moved up, brushing through his short hair. But in her mind's eye she was lacing her fingers through his long, dark and wavy locks.

It didn't take long for their clothing to become thrown down the side of the bed. Leah straddled Thorin, looking down at him with a smile. "I love you," she whispered, reaching down and kissing him. Then she adjusted herself and felt his manhood slide inside her. Thorin groaned upon the impact and began to pulse back and forth, getting used to the rhythm.

Leah watched as his form shifted yet again and she was looking down at the form of the dwarf king. His mesmerising eyes were focussed on her, full of love and lust. She continued moving, feeling in her mind as though something was trying desperately to push through. Until as she was just on the brink of climax she saw his form standing next to a river, naked and reaching down to scoop up water in his palms. The waves became stronger as she held onto the image of him in all his glory, and then let it fill her to the core. Electricity pulsed through her and gradually the image dissipated, only to be left with the sound of Thorin finally coming to his own climax. Leah watched as he closed his eyes and felt him grip her hips tightly.

They parted slowly, breathless. Leah fell down beside Thorin. "Shouldn't we be waiting until the wedding night?" Leah asked playfully, snuggling to his chest.

Thorin chuckled. "We should, yes. But with this body it doesn't count. In our tradition we really should wait for marriage, but not all of us do."

"Sounds like us. There are very few who hold on for marriage. I never did before I met you."

Thorin shifted slightly. "So you have taken other lovers?"

"Only two," Leah said, a little embarrassed. "My first boyfriend was from when I was seventeen. Least said about him the better. The second one was fun to be with, but deep down he didn't want the commitment. We only lasted two years. He knew I wanted children and he didn't. The first boyfriend was too obsessed with the idea of children and I was just too young back then and hated the idea."

Thorin kissed Leah's head. "And what about now?"

"Well, Gandalf has already been clear that we have children," she giggled. "It's something I'd like if it's right."

"And does this feel right to you?"

Leah rested on her arm and looked down into his eyes. "Yeah," she whispered with a content smile. "More than anything ever has in my life. It's just the circumstances that don't. So, tell me about you. Have you had many girlfriends?"

A faint blush crept onto Thorin's cheeks. "I've..had brief encounters with a couple of women," he said, looking away.

Leah couldn't help but giggle. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about. I told you about my exes. Now, that's something to be embarrassed about."

Briefly, like the night when he sat with Leah by the fire back in Middle-earth, Thorin temporarily forgot about the weights on his shoulders. She was his relief in dark times. He'd constantly shifted great burdens throughout his life, imprinting a dark hole inside him. And that hole had always caused him to retreat from too much merry making and enjoyment. It was as though he could never allow himself to let go; his whole existence was dictated by his destiny and responsibilities. His thoughts shifted to the many nights he'd watched her secretly joking with the rest of the Company. And then the slight stab of jealousy had hit when he saw her spending a lot of time with Fili. But now he could see why she'd formed a friendship with his older nephew; they were both young and possessed a sense of humour which was enough to entertain groups on the move and during hard times. Maybe her likeness to Fili wasn't enough to begin a spark of attraction.

And now the longer he spent with her in this world, he could see the cracks beginning to show in her shy and insecure demeanour. The light was pouring through those cracks.

"Can I tell you something?" Leah asked, taking Thorin's hand in hers and studying it carefully. She couldn't look him in the eye as she told him what was lingering on her lips.

"Of course."

"I saw you naked. We were camping by a river and whilst everyone else was settling down to sleep, I followed you. That was one of my memories which came back just then," she admitted. "And every time we make love, I see you as you were. You change in front of my eyes."

"I cannot deny that I often watched you without you realising," Thorin replied. "I was torturing myself because I believed you were taken with Fili and not me. He's younger and used to making others laugh."

"But you're so much more, Thorin," Leah almost cried out. She pulled herself up the bed, sitting up. "You don't see how powerful and just...I can't even put into words how I feel when I see you. I only have flashbacks of you as you were, but you're beautiful without even realising it. And then there's so much wisdom inside you and you care about people. You might not always outwardly show it, but deep down you do, and maybe you care too much."

Thorin got up and sat on the edge of the bed, putting his trousers back on. "As if I could be jealous of my own nephew. But I was when it came to you."

"Why are you eating yourself up over this?" Leah asked, rising up and putting her arms around him from behind. "You know I love you. I don't remember Fili, but seriously, he could never compare to you. Why would I want the Prince when I've got the King?"

Thorin looked at her, placing a kiss against her lips. "Forgive me. I'm being unreasonable."

Leah decided to leave the subject as she sensed there was something more to this than him just being a little jealous of Fili. Maybe age-wise Fili could be better suited to Leah as she was a couple of years shy of thirty, but she couldn't stop feeling what she did for Thorin.

"While we wait for Gandalf with news on what's happening, how about I make us something to eat and you can actually begin to tell me about what escapades we got up to? You seem to keep dodging actually telling me what happened," Leah suggested.

"Alright. Sounds like a decent proposal," he replied. But there was something lingering in his eyes, something unspoken. A shameful secret. And the more he watched Leah, the harder it became for him to move with the secret in his heart. Yes, he did feel jealousy over Leah and Fili and for one reason. He'd seen them. Thorin had seen Leah go to Fili when he was in the grip of his Dragon Sickness and cling to Fili. She'd wept on him and Fili had kissed her head, shushing her. How dare Fili give Leah that comfort when it was he that should be!

"This is just irrational jealousy," Thorin told himself. "Fili and Leah are close but only as friends. That may change, however, once we get back to Middle-earth. You are torturing yourself."

For twenty minutes or so, Leah clanged and banged around the kitchen, searching for food and then placing it in the oven and on the hob. "Shouldn't take too long," she called over her shoulder. Then she felt strong arms wind around her middle and lips caress the base of her neck.

"Once we're home, you won't have to worry about preparing meals," he told her. He clung to her in those moments, hating himself for even considering the possibility that she'd ever love Fili over him. Where had this sudden jealousy come from? Now that he had Leah in his arms and knew her love for him was true, why was he still clinging on? The jealousy should have died with him on the ice and not been reborn.

Once Leah and Thorin had eaten, they wound themselves tightly together on the leather sofa under a blanket and began to talk, getting down to what Leah had been waiting to discuss. "So, what happened on the night by the fire?" she asked, resting her head against his chest. "I don't understand why that memory is so poignant."

"I think it is because that is the only time whilst on the journey that we truly spent time together alone. The rest of the Company had retired to sleep, and I believe Balin was keeping watch. You told me about your home, especially your sister."

The bright flames illuminated Leah's face beautifully and Thorin couldn't help but study her all the more. She was not outwardly stunning like an Elf maiden or strong like a dwarf woman. But her beauty and strength came through in her gestures and the words she didn't even realise she'd uttered. She'd sat alongside Ori, listening to him speak in the slow way he usually did, and she'd been patient, listening carefully and reassuring him that he'd be alright. Then she would join Dwalin, Balin and Fili where they would take turns to laugh about the day's events. And her beauty would shine through when she'd smile at Bilbo as he sang songs often performed by the regular customers of The Green Dragon back in Hobbiton.

Leah shivered in the cold air. Nervously Thorin offered his coat, but rather than take his warmth away, Leah moved closer and rested against him. "You're lovely and warm," she muttered and closed her eyes.

Thorin came back to the present moment to see that she'd drifted off to sleep again on him, and like before, she was smiling.

In Leah's mind another memory began to spill forth. She was stood in the enormous and grand halls of Erebor, looking up at the ornate angular handiwork of the dwarves. Her heart was sinking as she looked upon the man she loved, dressed in his fur robes and crown. His eyes were burning with anger, and even more worryingly, greed.

"Thorin, people will die, your own family included if you don't fight your way out of this!" Leah shouted. "Your pride is getting in the way, and you're willing to see people butcher each other?!"

Thorin jumped to his feet and glared at her. "How dare you speak to me with that tongue! You are but a guest who has outstayed their welcome. Walk away now or I will physically throw you out!" Thorin boomed. "You are no dwarf...you are nothing!"

Leah saw sheer red and moved quickly and lightly on her feet, directly in front of him. "Right now, I'm showing more fucking decency than you are!" she growled. "Typical man in all ways. Once you've got the power, nothing else fucking matters, not even your own nephews who you know would walk to the ends of the Earth for you! I even thought I would, but not now."

A short while later and Leah woke. Thorin had also fallen asleep, but still had his arms locked around her. The images of the dream began to filter though; she saw him sat on his throne, his beautiful eyes masked with greed, anger and ferocity. She was nothing? He really had uttered those words to her, words she'd heard before. They'd been words she'd grown up believing from the treatment of so-called friends and even boyfriends. Surely, even in the grip of a, what would be seen as, psychological break, he wouldn't have stooped that low?

Leah got up from the sofa, placing the blanket back over Thorin and put her hands to her face. Everything was going absolutely insane. She was in love with a man who was really a dwarf king from another world? And there was a wizard, also from that said world, looking for her lover's nephews. Where was the rationality in all of this? Then there was the conclusion that they were destined to be together? The doubt and fear was beginning to haze across Leah's vision again. True, she felt attraction to Thorin so amazingly painfully strong, but all of this wasn't worth fighting for. It wasn't worth the doubt and the fear, and also the desperation of trying to find out everything that had happened back in Middle-earth.

Leah put her shoes on and gave Thorin one last glance before swiftly leaving the flat. Maybe the cool evening air would help her see this all more clearly.