July 2366

Chapter 16

"So this is your house?" Tevi looked around the main room, nodding in appreciation. "It's big."

"Yeah," B'Elanna replied, embarrassed by the comparative luxury she must live in compared to how Tevi grew up. "Sorry to ask you to come here, but it's my day to stay home with my grandfather."

Tevi waved a hand. "Don't worry about it. Where is he? Can I meet him?"

"He's asleep." Ma'Leth's condition had rapidly declined in the last several weeks, to the point that he couldn't be left unattended. The family had been taking turns caring for him, and today was B'Elanna's day. "He was really out of it this morning." B'Elanna decided to leave out the excrement infused details.

"That's too bad. From the way you've spoken about him, I was looking forward to meeting him again."

B'Elanna shrugged. "He's not like he used to be. He's really gone downhill this last week." She tried not to think about it, but she knew he'd be dead soon. She took a breath, trying to focus on Tevi rather than her grandfather's impending fate.

Tevi must have noticed her distress. She stepped forward, clasping B'Elanna's shoulder. "At least he hasn't suffered long."

B'Elanna tried not to grimace. She hated when people said that. "Yeah. Can I get you something to drink? Eat?"

After a discussion of the options available, the pair returned to the couch, armed with waters and tortilla chips with guacamole.

"It looks slimy," Tevi said, poking at the dip with her chip.

B'Elanna scooped up a large portion of the green mash. "Well, if you don't like it, more for me," she replied with a smile.

"I didn't say I wouldn't eat it," Tevi retorted with a grin of her own. "I'm a child of the Occupation, I'll eat just about anything." Tevi popped a dip covered chip in her mouth. "It's good," she said, raising her hand to cover her full mouth. "But it is slimy."

B'Elanna chuckled. "Well, fuck, I guess I'll have to share." Leaning back into the couch, she rested her head against the pillows. "When do you leave?"

"The day after tomorrow." Tevi was still leaning forward, shoveling guacamole smeared chips into her mouth. "I don't know when I'll be back. This supply might be drying up."

"Is there a way for me to contact you via subspace?"

Tevi shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't give you my ship's ID. If someone connects you and me…"

B'Elanna pulled her knees towards her chest. "I understand."

A chip halfway to her mouth, Tevi paused. "You know it's not you, right? I'd love to talk to you more often. But I have to protect the movement. And you."

"No, I know." Stop being so sulky. "I've actually been reading about the Cardassians and the Occupation since the last time you were here."

"That's not light reading."

"No. But after reading about all the horrible things the Cardassians have done, I don't know why the Federation isn't helping your resistance."

Tevi was silent for a moment, her lips pursed. "I know why they aren't helping us."

B'Elanna leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. "You do?"

Tevi's face went hard. "The Federation has its ideals and thinks it lives up to them, but, in the end, it foremost wants to protect its people. The war with the Cardassians was long and bloody, and they will do almost anything to stop that from happening again. Bajor is nothing to the Federation – just some foreigners who live in a backwater part of the quadrant. It does the Federation no good to get involved with us now."

B'Elanna didn't know what to say for a moment. "But I was taught the Federation stands for what's right," she insisted. "To let people suffer like this-"

"No great power always stands for what's right." Tevi shoved another guacamole slathered chip into her mouth. "Look, I wish the Federation would help us. I wish they would partner with all the other powers in the quadrant and kill every last Cardassian in existence."

B'Elanna sat back, surprised by the venom in Tevi's voice. "But that's genocide. Even innocent ones?"

"There is no such thing." Tevi's voice was cold. "It's not unusual for teenage Cardassians to torture our kids. What kind of people raise children like that?"

B'Elanna paled. "I… I don't know."

"No one who deserves to exist. But how many Federation lives would it cost to wipe out the Cardassians?"

B'Elanna tried to imagine the full-scale war. She tried to dredge up memories from her tactical training class. Billions? More?

"It would be trillions," Tevi continued, answering her own question. "The Federation would never commit to that for a couple billion Bajorans."

B'Elanna tried to come up with a response - nothing came to her. "I wish I could help you somehow," B'Elanna said, sidestepping the question of interstellar war.

Tevi's face softened back into the open visage that B'Elanna had come to know over the last several months. "You have helped. I don't know what I would have done without you last month."

A small grin on her face, B'Elanna looked down and fiddled with her hands. "That was nothing. I wish… I'd like to help in a more substantive way. It felt good to do something to help others. I'd like to do more of that."

Tevi patted B'Elanna on the leg. "You can help others without getting involved with a rebellion. You're helping your family right now by taking care of your grandfather. Your job is helping to make space travel more efficient."

"It doesn't feel like any of that actually matters." B'Elanna pulled her leg away from Tevi's hand. "VavnI' will be dead soon. Any technician could do my job. My mom would be happier if I left again." B'Elanna stopped, feeling that familiar knot in her throat. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be whining."

"Come here." Tevi open her arms wide, gesturing for B'Elanna to come close. B'Elanna eyed her for a moment: no one hugged her other than VavnI'. Tevi was looking at her, quizzically. "Do neither humans nor Klingons hug?"

"No, they do," B'Elanna replied, moving towards Tevi. The older woman wrapped B'Elanna in her strong arms, and the herbal scent of Tevi's soap filled her nose as she leaned against her shoulder. B'Elanna could feel her muscles relaxing as Tevi held her in a tight embrace.

"Listen to me," Tevi spoke, her voice soft and low. "It doesn't matter that your grandfather will go home to the Prophets soon; you're here for him now. There's no way your mom would be happier without you; you're a good person who cares deeply for others. And as for your job… Well, you can always get a different one of those if this one isn't right." Tevi pulled back from B'Elanna, who hoped her tears weren't too evident. "You'll make it through this rough patch. You're young still. Your whole life is in front of you. You'll find your place in the universe, believe me."

For that moment, B'Elanna did.

=/\=

"VavnI'?" B'Elanna whispered as she cracked open his bedroom door. Tevi had left a few minutes ago, and with her departure, B'Elanna realized she'd neglected to look in on her grandfather for several hours. "VavnI'?" she called, louder this time, as she slipped into the room.

The room was quiet. Too quiet.

He wasn't breathing.

B'Elanna rushed to her grandfather, grabbing him by the shoulders. "VavnI'!" she shouted, shaking him. He didn't respond. B'Elanna pressed her fingers against his neck. His skin was cold and she could find no pulse.

"VavnI', no," B'Elanna moaned and she tried to figure out what to do. Try to get him breathing again? Call Miral?

The death ritual.

B'Elanna ran her hands down her grandfather's face. This is what he'd wanted. He didn't want her to try to revive him… he wanted to die. It took all the restraint B'Elanna had to not try to interfere, to keep him with her for just a little longer.

Wasn't there time for another conversation? Couldn't they just go to the kitchen one last time? How could she practice the Mok'bara alone every morning? Why wasn't there just another moment for her to tell him how much she loved him?

"VavnI'…" Tears rolled down B'Elanna cheeks as she held her grandfather's face. "Why did you have to die when I'm the only one here? I don't know what to do. I've never performed the death ritual."

Ma'Leth could no longer help her.

Trying to focus, B'Elanna thought back to her schooling at the Klingon monastery. You open the dead warrior's eyes… You yell at the sky… Was there anything else?

Placing her fingers on his cheeks and brow, B'Elanna pried open Ma'Leth's eyes. They stared back at her, empty of the warmth they'd once held. Staring into them, B'Elanna could feel the tears falling from her own eyes. Blinking rapidly, B'Elanna threw her head up to the heaven and screamed.

When her lungs had exhausted their air, B'Elanna let go of Ma'Leth's eyes and sagged against his chest.

=/\=