Chapter Fifteen-Confessions

I turn and look at Kate. What the hell is she doing here?

I glare at her for intruding on a private moment. "What do you want?"

She ignores me as she rushes over to Ana. "Ana, what's wrong? Did he hurt you?"

"She's my fucking wife, I would never hurt her!" I say, outraged at the notion.

Kate turns and gives me a dirty look. "Oh, please, like we both know you couldn't give two shits about Ana. You just want your precious money," she sneers at me.

My eyes fly to Ana, but her face is buried in her hands as she continues to cry. I sigh, biting back the irritation at Ana for telling Crazy Kavanagh about our deal, and walk to her, wanting to soothe her.

I place my hand on Ana's shoulder and she jerks away from me and looks up at me like I'm a disease.

"Don't touch me! And for the last time, leave me the hell alone!"

I stare at her in shock as she runs out of the room with tears streaming down her face.

I go to run after her but Kate stands in my way, glaring at me. "Don't you think you've done enough?"

I just stare at her. I feel my shoulders roll forward and my mouth flattens into a thin line. I don't even know what I've done. It's all Ana, she's acting like she belongs in a mental asylum.

She turns around and struts out of my room. I drag both of my hands through my hair and pull at my roots. Why is it every time I try to talk to her the situation seems to get worse? Why can't we just have a calm simple conversation and solve whatever problem there is between us?

I groan and leave my room, heading back downstairs knowing I'm about to get an earful.

I feel everyone glaring at me before I even get to the bottom step. I look up and see my entire family in the foyer gazing at me like I've lost my mind.

My mother speaks up first. "Christian, what's going on? Ana came running down the stairs bawling her eyes out and ran next door. Kate and Ray went after her."

I rake my fingers through my hair and sigh. I didn't want this to happen. I can't explain what's going on because I don't even know.

I continue my descent down the last step as I say, "It's nothing. Just a disagreement, don't worry," I mutter unconvincingly.

"It didn't seem like nothing, bro," Elliot comments.

"I don't understand why you two are fighting, you should be happy. Everyone's happy when they get back from their honeymoon," my mom says.

"Yeah, because all they do is fuck," Elliot mumbles.

"Elliot!"

"Jesus Christ, will you guys just drop it! I said it's nothing so leave it the fuck alone!" I yell at all of them.

I turn away from all of their shocked faces and bolt out through the front door. I get in my car and drive away, not even knowing where I'm driving to. I've been driving for about twenty minutes, and when I actually take in my surroundings I realize I'm in the area where Ana's secret cliff is.

I park the car and get out, walking through the narrow path, and when I finally get to the grassy cliff, I just stand there and stare out in the distance. Closing my eyes, I take a deep calming breath and breathe in the salty natural scent of earth and let the tension slowly leave my body.

What I would do to go back to the day Ana first took me here. It was simple, no complications, nothing. And that's all it is now. I just . . . I don't want to lose her. She's become a permanent figure in my life and I can't imagine it without her now. And I know it's only been two weeks since we even started this whole ordeal, but it feels like it's been longer than that. I've known her most of my life, but just recently I realized how important she is to me. I can't lose her. I can't. But I don't know how to keep her either. Every time I talk to her it always goes downhill. I have no idea how to make us move forward in a positive direction.

"It's beautiful out here."

I jump and yelp when I hear my Grandpa Grey's voice.

"What are you doing here? How did you find me?" I ask him, trying to calm my racing heart.

"I followed you," he says, looking out over the horizon rather than me.

"Oh." Is all I can think to say.

It's quiet for a moment. He doesn't say anything and I'm waiting for him to say something. Obviously there's a reason he followed me.

He sighs. "You know, I thought you were trying to pull one over me when you came home with Ana on your arm and suddenly engaged. I'm still not sure if I really believe that whole story about you two dating for two years, and you just coincidentally proposing to her after you found about the trust fund." He looks at me from the corner of his eye. "But I can tell you love her." I snap my head towards him, a deep frown pulling my mouth down. He smirks. "No man would act the way you did about his wife being upset if he didn't love her." He gazes at me, a glint in his eye. "You do love her, don't you?"

I turn away from him and take a deep breath. I swallow, my throat suddenly dry. I don't want to admit my feelings yet. Admitting how you feel makes it everything real. I'd rather live in a fantasy than have to face my feelings, and I'd rather not admit my feelings out loud to him.

I glance at him and he seems to be waiting for my answer. I can't tell him no, I would feel guilty for lying, not only to him but also to myself, but I'm not ready to actually say yes either. I decide not to say anything so slightly just nod my head.

He nods and I see a small smile on his lips as he turns back to the Pacific. "I knew there was something between you two last week, but I'd never imagined it'd turn into something more." He turns back to me. "You look at Ana the same way I look at your Nana Beth." He chuckles and then sighs contemplatively. "It's pretty peculiar the way everything in our lives change when we fall in love, isn't it? I remember when I was in my mid-thirties I wanted to be a bachelor until my last breath, and then I saw Elizabeth and she flipped my entire word upside down." He laughs heartily, reminiscing.

"I'd do anything for that woman. And I know she'd do anything for me. It's our job as husbands to take care of our wives. We need to make sure to keep them happy, otherwise our lives become shit." He grins and winks at me. He turns he body towards me and cocks his head to the side. "Now this idea of yours to get into business, is it a good one?"

I raise my brow and clear my throat. I wasn't expecting him to ask that so casually.

I nod my head. "Yes. I think so."

"Do you think it will not only bring you success but happiness?"

"Yes."

"Would you be able to provide for Ana and your family, when you get to that point?"

"Yes."

He gazes at me for a moment, those greens eyes so similar to my dad's scrutinizing me. He digs into his jacket pocket and then pulls out a folded piece of paper. He hands it to me.

"Then I think you deserve this."

I look up at him as I unfold the paper. "What is it?" I ask.

"All the information you need to open your trust fund."

My shocked gaze finds his calm one. "Y—you're giving me my trust fund?" I ask, dazed. Honestly I was expecting him to withhold it just because he can.

"I am. But I'd be lying if I said I was giving it to you for you to pursue a career without a college education."

I almost groan and have to swallow down the urge to roll my eyes. Of course he wouldn't give me my trust fund because he believed in me. How ignorant of me to think otherwise. I guess in his eyes even if I become the most successful man on the West Coast he'd still see me as a failure because I didn't finish college. Whatever. You have to pick your battles and this isn't one I want to fight.

"Then why did you give this to me?" I ask a little bitterly.

He ignores my tone. "So you have enough money to support your wife until you can get on your feet."

I just stare at him, not sure what to say. I can't necessarily argue with his reason. I do need money, and I did promise Ana a share of it. So even if she does divorce me—as if I'd let her without a fight—she'll have money take to care of herself without Ray's support.

I give my grandfather a small smile and hold up the paper. "Thanks for this, Papa. I will make sure to take care of Ana and I hope one day I can make you proud of me."

I don't wait for him to say anything. I just walk away, back to my car without a glance back. From here I move forward.

I drive back to my parents' house, but my intention isn't to see my parents. I need to see Ana. I get out of my car and walk across the lawn to Ray's front door. Knocking three times I wait for someone to answer. I could just walk in but I don't think that'll be a good idea considering the way Ana ran out of my house.

Ray opens the door and looks down at me in surprise. Which surprises me. I expected him to be scowling at me.

"Christian, what are you doing here, son? I thought you went home." He gestures me inside.

"Uh, no not yet and not without Ana."

He smiles at me. It's unnerving. I was really expecting him to punch my teeth in.

"Good luck with that, son. The way she was ranting and raving about you . . ." he trails off with a shake of his head.

"So she's here then?"

He nods. "She's in her room. Kate's with her," he adds. I roll my eyes. Of course She-Devil II would be here.

"Do you mind if I go up?"

He laughs and shakes his head. "She's your wife and therefor now your responsibility."

I smirk at him. I kind of like the sound of Ana being my responsibility. I want to take care of her, even if she doesn't want me to.

I head for the stairs but Ray's voice stops me. I turn to him.

"I know the girl is a handful and has the power to drive you mad, but be patient with her. She's more fragile than she let's on."

Yeah I figured that out in no time at all. I nod at Ray. "I gave you my promise that I would protect her. I don't plan on ever breaking that promise."

"I know you won't." He walks back into the living room.

I climb the stairs and turn to my right. I stop at Ana's door, but since it's cracked open I can hear her and Kate talking. I lean against the doorframe.

"What am I going to do, Kate? I don't think I can go back to that house with him," I hear Ana's weary voice.

"Ana," Kate sighs. "I think you're making this more complicated than what it is. You're acting like you're the first woman to be in love with her husband."

I suck in a deep breath and lean closer against the wall, further from the door.

Ana's in love me? Is that why she's been acting so weird? I thought love was supposed to make people happy. Ana has in no way has been acting happy. Why didn't she just tell me?

I lean closer to the door again when I hear Ana's voice.

"That's not the point, Kate. It's a dead end loving him. There's no possible future for us."

"Why isn't there?"

"Haven't you been listening? Christian only married me because he wanted to get into his trust fund. He's just using me, he doesn't love me. And then he wanted to be friends with benefits. He didn't want to be in a relationship with me. Don't you get it? Christian doesn't want to be with me. He just wants me in his life when it conveniences him."

She sounds so pitiful and it makes my heart throb. How could she think I'm just using her? I'll admit, in the beginning I was, but all that's changed now. I don't understand how she thinks I don't want to be with her. Have I really made her feel like she couldn't tell me that she loves me, or that I don't at least feel something for her?

"I thought you told me that he said he was falling in love with you?" Kate asks.

I hear Ana scoff. "He was drunk. He didn't know what he was talking about, which is obvious since it wasn't important enough for him to remember saying it."

Kate sighs. "Don't you think that maybe you should talk to him before you start assuming what your relationship with him will be like?"

"No. I already know how he feels. It would just be a waste of time."

I hear Kate huff in frustration. "You're just so hell bent on wanting to feel sorry for yourself, Ana. In my opinion it's pretty pathetic. I always thought you were the type of person to stand up for yourself, but maybe I judged you wrong. Just like how you might be judging Christian's intentions wrong."

"You know, I didn't ask you to come here and lecture me on how I should be feeling. And since when did you start championing him? You have no idea what my and Christian's relationship is like, so stop butting in!" Ana snaps, sounding frustrated.

"Then I guess there's no reason for me to be here." I hear Kate walking towards me. I hide around the corner facing away from the door. "Call me when you get your head out of your ass."

Kate walks away not bothering to close Ana's door. She says goodbye to Ray and leaves. I feel a little different about her now. I'm surprised she tried to stand up for me especially after all she said to me earlier. I wonder what's changed.

I walk around the corner and stand at the threshold of Ana's room. I stare at her curled-up form on her bed. I think I see her shoulder's shaking. I think she's crying. I hear her sniffle, proving that she's crying. I realize I really don't like seeing her sad.

Stepping into the room, I say, "Ana?"

She wipes her eyes as she sits up in bed and looks at me. "Christian. What are you doing here? I thought you went home."

I shake my head as I walk closer to her. "Not without you."

I'm standing right on the side of her bed. I slowly lean down and wipe away her tears. I'm surprised that she lets me, even more surprised when she leans into my touch. I slowly smile.

I hear her take a deep breath, open her eyes and then pull her face out of my reach. I stare into her eyes and for a minute I think about sitting down and just admit that I heard what she said, and then tell her how I feel, but I change my mind when I see defiance cloud her eyes. God, please I'm tired of arguing with this woman. Give me the strength.

"I don't want to go back there," she whispers.

"Why not?"

She shrugs. "I just don't."

"Well you're coming back home with me whether you want to or not."

She purses her lips. "You can't force me to go back there, Christian."

I raise a brow at her. "You're going, even if I have to throw you over my shoulder."

She scoots out of bed and stands on the other side. I move towards her.

"I don't want to go back, Christian."

"You're my wife. We have a house together. I'm not going back there without you."

"Why do you want me to go back so badly? Why can't I just stay here while you live there?"

"Because you're my wife and technically that house belongs to you. You don't live here anymore."

She glares at me. "Fine. But I'm sleeping in the guestroom."

I sigh and clench my jaw. "Fine."

She stands there and stares at me. She's already dressed so I know she doesn't have to change, but she couldn't even if she wanted to since most of her clothes are back at the house.

I hold my hands out impatiently. "What are you waiting for? Let's go."

She rolls her eyes and struts out of the room. I follow her. Why is this woman so difficult?

Ray meets us at the door as we prepare to leave. He wraps his arms around Ana and holds her close.

"I love you, Annie. No matter how old you get you will always be my baby girl," Ray says into her hair.

"I love you, too, Dad."

He kisses her forehead as they pull apart. Ray reaches out to shake my hand.

"See you soon, son."

"See you later, Ray," I say, guiding Ana out of the door.

I help her into the car and she surprisingly lets me, and when I'm in the driver's seat I pull out of my parents' driveway and head home.

When we're almost home I turn and say, "Papa gave me the information to open my trust fund."

"Did he?" she asks sounding uninterested.

I ignore her tone. "Yeah. I'm going to open it Monday, so I'll be able to give you your percentage soon."

"I don't want it."

I glance at her. "What?"

"I said I don't want it."

I shake my head, not understanding. "Why not?" I ask sounding perturbed. "We had a deal, Ana. I promised you a percentage so you'll get it."

"Oh my God, Christian. Does there really have to be a reason? I don't want it, so please just drop it."

I huff out an annoyed breath. "Why do you always have to make simple things so complicated?"

She doesn't answer me. I sigh. Our situation is complicated as is our relationship. Love is simply complicated.

I drive us back home in complete silence.

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