AN: I! Am! Such! A! Piece! Of! Shit! At! Updating!
This chapter also deals with a lot of crap (it's kinda depressing tbh) including rape (just discussion of it not actual rape) so TWs.
I have something else I need to say but it's kinda spoilers for the chapter so I'll put it at the bottom.

Chapter Twenty-Four
Of Love and Fuck-Ups

The first love in each of our eight heroes' lives was their parents. This was their only similarity. After his parents, James had next loved the toy Quaffle his mother had bought him, ignoring her husband's teasing protests that she was trying to turn him Chaser against her (which had worked). Then his other family members, most notably Teddy Lupin, whom he still considered his first brother. Then his blood brother, Albus, as soon as he entered, a screaming wailing mess, into James' life. Next was flying, then Lily, and now his friends. The last love in James' life would be motorcycles, as they came late into his life, unexpectedly, through a friend. For now however, James tended to keep his loves close to his heart, leaving him vulnerable, but them under his protection.

No-one touched Mr Quaffle.

James wrote these things down with his battered quill as Sarah Youngs, the Hufflepuff Quidditch Captain and Prefect, instructed. Trust it to be a Hufflepuff running the session on love. Sam peeked over his shoulder and frowned, biting the end of her quill.

"What is it?" He asked, looking down at his parchment in confusion for what had upset her. Sam just gestured to her own piece of parchment, which read;

Sam Andrews

Loves, in chronological order;

· Alex

· Billy

· Hayden

· Fighting

· James

· Lee

· Lee

· Lee?

James looked back at his own list, which almost filled his whole sheet of parchment.

"So what?" Sam shrugged, looking angry at herself for caring. She caught his eye though, and thanked him with a look for not being bothered by how small her circle was. And for not crowing about how he'd made it onto the list. Love, it seemed, was one of them few things James could take seriously.

It was well known in the British Wizarding community that the Weasleys were some of the most accepting, least muggle-hating purebloods out there. Not to say all of them were, but the majority were pretty good at adapting.

Molly Weasley was not an exception.

"Hey, Sam." Scorpius called. Sam and James turned round to see the Slytherin walking to catch up with them in the corridor between lessons, followed by Albus, Molly and Lien.

"What's up?"

"We've got sexualities next. And I was just wondering how long the phases last?" Sam frowned at him.

"The 'phases'?"

"You know the bisexual phases." Sam blinked and then started in anger but before she could say anything Molly cut in.

"Oh my Merlin, Scorpius you can't just ask somebody that!" Scorpius raised an eyebrow. Molly lowered her voice, shooting Sam an apologetic look. "Think of how awkward it will be when the phase ends! One of them's going to heartbroken." She said carefully. Scorpius frowned slightly.

"Merlin Sam I didn't think of that. Please accept my apology." He said, searching Sam's gaze. Sam was so confused that she couldn't even begin to correct them on how wrong they were.

"You're both idiots." Lien said, before James could. "Sexuality is not a phase. It's more like a diagnosis. You might get it wrong the first few times you try to label yourself but it doesn't go away with time."

"Or medicine?" James said, incredulous at her fairly terrible analogy. Lien folded her hands in front of her.

"In church we're taught that through perseverance and returning to God's light, we can change for the better." Sam snarled in anger.

"They also try to teach you witches are to be burnt at the stake." She spat, fuming. She could deal with Molly and Scorpius' lack of education; it wasn't really their fault that they hadn't been exposed to enough diversity. Lien, however, should not be preaching at her about whether dating a woman would send her to hell.

"God meant for us to procreate. That is the truth. And so, surely other sexualities are going against that cause."

"There's overpopulation everywhere!" Sam spluttered, having never had to have an argument where she was required to talk it out rather than beat the sense into someone with her fists. Speaking of, they itched where they were clenched at her sides, demanding that she use them to break someone's jaw. Sam had met plenty of Christians in her life that were very accepting of the progression of society and how loving someone who wasn't "expected" wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Lien had no excuse.

"Guys you didn't tell us we were meeting up!" Lydjah called out, still grinning at whatever Jayna had last said to her as the Ravenclaws completed the group. Her smile quickly died on her face as they took in the simmering tension in the air.

"What's going on?" Jayna asked, carefully.

"No point asking your opinion pureblood." Sam snarled. Jayna started in surprise. James lifted his hands in a calming gesture.

"Hey Sam that's not fair. I'm a pureblood remember?"

"And the only reason you're not like her is that your dad was raised in the Muggle world, in my world, where people aren't such fucking assholes!"

"What's this about?" Lydjah asked again. Sam pointed a finger sharply at Lien.

"Someone thinks I'm going to Hell for my girlfriend." Lydjah swung her gaze to the Hufflepuff, looking disappointed.

"What in Merlin's name Lien?" Jayna gasped. "Even if Hell was real, which it isn't, why on earth would Sam be going there? She's not sinning just because she likes girls and boys. In my books, sins are like crimes, and love sure as Merlin isn't a crime." Sam felt a twinge of guilt for assuming the Ravenclaw wouldn't be on her side. She slanted a look at Lydjah.

"Oh I gave her the sexualities talk about two weeks into being friends." Lydjah grinned. To their surprise, Lien didn't back down. In fact, she exploded with an anger they had never expected from her short stature.

"You don't get to shit on my beliefs just because you don't agree with them! Fuck you! God is just as real as this fucking Merlin you're always going on about; and he's a lot more important! He said lying with someone of the same sex should be punished with stoning; you're lucky they haven't done that to you yet." She said, looking at Sam with disgust. Molly took a step away from them as the others looked at her in horror. She realised after a moment she had gone too far, but it was too late.

"Lien you had better leave right now or I am not going to stop Sam from punching your lights out." James said, voice trembling with the anger he was trying to supress in order to remain calm. She opened her mouth to apologise, closed it, and then spun on her heel and left without a word. "Sam." He started, and then couldn't find the words to continue. Sam, much as she loathed admitting it, was shaken. To think that one of her closest friends thought she deserved death for whom she was dating…

"I didn't know… I shouldn't have brought this up. I'm sorry." Scorpius said sombrely, tilting his chin to his chest. Sam couldn't think past needing to punch something. She whirled in rage and slammed her fist into the wall, hissing through her teeth at the pain. James hovered next to her, not knowing what to do. Jayna mouthed 'Hogsmeade' behind Sam's back and James nodded vigorously. His light touch on Sam's shoulder was enough to get his best friend's attention. They shared a look that was indecipherable to the others before Sam sighed and held out her hand for his inspection. A couple of her knuckles had split but nothing Hospital-Wing worthy. He tugged her fingers lightly, giving her another look, and this time she nodded and followed after him as he began to walk away. James shot the others a reassuring glance but Sam didn't deign to even turn her head, anger still palpable in the tension in her shoulders.

"Hey you lot," Lydjah started softly, the raw emotion left lingering in air too new to disturb with harsh words, "why don't you go to your lessons on this and if you have any questions at the end of the day I'll be in the dining hall for tea and you can ask me, ok? Take this opportunity to learn, and don't be put off asking questions." The Slytherins nodded and left without their usual goodbyes, Albus looking almost as blank as Scorpius usually, and Scorpius a whole new level of chilly.

Molly looked like she was going to cry. Jayna gave her a hug, knowing Lydjah wouldn't want to, and tried to push all the comfort she could give in that one squeeze. She squatted slightly, so she was eye-level with Molly, still holding onto her shoulders, and Molly was suddenly uncomfortably aware of how naïve she must seem to Jayna, who in some ways had a very similar childhood to Molly's, but so irreparably different too.

"Mol. You know her best. I didn't mean to offend her by suggesting Hell wasn't real; I honestly had no idea she was so strongly religious. That doesn't mean she had any right to say what she did." Jayna bit her lip. "And none of it matters in terms of we still have to get the Secret, and sooner rather than later. Can you get her to come to the trials?" Molly thought about it.

"Yes. But it's not going to be alright for a while."

"She won't apologise?"

"She'll apologise for going too far, but never about her beliefs."

"Not even an accurate interpretation of the Bible." Lydjah muttered, under her breath. Jayna gave her a sad smile.

"Thanks Mol." Molly nodded and, sensing the conversation was over, gave a wave as she wandered to her next lesson, bracing herself for having to deal with Lien sooner rather than later.

"Who is this can tell me what heterosexual means?" Killian Nash, the womaniser turned love-struck Prefect was running this lesson but neither Slytherin was that upset about it in light of the conversation with Lien; they could use a bit of his humour right now.

"Being solely attracted to the opposite gender?" Asher Baddock offers. Killian grins at him and taps his ringed fingers against the desk in approval.

"Correct, five points to Slytherin. Now who can tell me what any of the letters in LGBTQIA+ stand for?" Killian was met mostly with a sea of blank faces. Charlotte Ackerly shyly raises her hand. "Yep?"

"Lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans are the first four."

"Correct, five points to Ravenclaw." Killian winked at her and she blushed to the roots of her hair. Albus and Scorpius shared an unimpressed look. "Does anybody in here not know what those mean?" Thanks to their gender lesson earlier in the day, they were now well-versed in transgender, and the others even those from the most prestigious Pureblood backgrounds like Scorpius had at least heard of them. "Good, good. Right. 'Q' stands for Queer, which has become sort of a blanket-term for anybody under the banner. While the LGBT+ community has reclaimed queer from its offensive background, it still makes some people uncomfortable and its best to check with the person you're speaking to before you go throwing it around like an expert. The 'I' stands for intersex. Intersex people are people who were born with mixed genitalia."

There are a few surprised looks around the room. "Yeah your old folks' argument about 'but biologically' isn't holding up well is it?" Killian continued. His grin dampened slightly. "Lots of intersex people have operations done to them after they're born without their consent to give them the 'correct' genitalia and not a mixed set. This leads a lot of problems, not to mention that it's just morally wrong. Anyway, the A stands for Asexual. Asexual people, or Aces, don't experience sexual attraction. I should point out at this point that your sexual orientation doesn't necessarily denote your romantic orientation, though they are likely to correlate. LGBTQIA+ is not an exhaustive list of labels; there are many others like demisexual and grey-sexual that are further to the ace end of the spectrum as well as pansexual which is similar in some ways to bisexual.

"However, this lesson is not about getting you to learn all the different labels; if you want to, go ahead, if not, be supportive and understanding of people who do want to. No, this lesson is about informing you that whatever orientation you experience; it is valid. So long as everything you do is consensual by all involved parties, do whatever makes you happy. At the end of the day, we've got one life on this earth and we're better off spending it doing things we love." Scorpius raised his eyebrows at the motivational speech coming from the renowned bad-boy. "Or the people we love. You know. Alternatively." Nevermind.

"If you want to learn more about sexualities and you don't have access to technology, the librarian would apparently be happy to recommend books for you, or you can come and ask anybody who is involved in this week's activities. Anybody have any questions for me now?"

"What's the whole 'phases' myth?" Scorpius didn't realise he'd spoken till every head in the room swivelled to look at him. He was notoriously aloof in class usually, but refused to let himself look embarrassed, instead fixing his flinty silver gaze on Killian.

"People, specifically the older generation, appear to have an affixation with pretending LGBT+ wasn't a thing way back when. With sexualities becoming more and more accepted and people no longer to content to just be lumped in one of two categories, gay or straight, the older generation are apparently incapable of accepting anything outside of those two labels, and think it's a teenage phase like the year where you have a terrible haircut or the year where you think The Bent-Winged Snitches are a good band." Albus thought of Jayna and tried not to snort, "Sexuality is not a phase. While you might go through phases of experimentation, it does not make your sexuality any less valid. It's also not going to suddenly go away; there is never going to be a day when I wake up and do not love Emma Lacey because I suddenly don't like girls. It doesn't work like that. Does that help?" Scorpius realised the last question was directed at him and, ignoring the dreamy sighs of the girls around him, nodded curtly to Killian.

At lunch, Lydjah and Jayna had decided to go for a mostly silent walk around the castle, hoping the chilly air would rid them of the last bad feeling clinging to them from their disastrous conversation with Lien. Their last lesson had been on consent, and Jayna knew it had put Lydjah more on edge than usual. To watch their classmates learn about consent to prevent anything happening to them the way it had already happened to Lydjah… It was as difficult to watch as it was relieving.

Even Lydjah hadn't known all the ways Wizarding folk could take your consent away from you. Love potions, regarded as a bit of a laugh, were more disgusting the longer you thought about them. Especially as anyone could slip you a love potion; for anyone else. If, for example, Jayna slipped Lydjah a love potion for Scorpius and Scorpius didn't know and went along with it, he couldn't be persecuted despite it being him who would be assaulting the drugged Lydjah. Their consent talk had included how to recognise the symptoms of love potions as well as the Imperius curse (Jayna had received some apprehensive looks for knowing all of those) and spells you could perform discreetly on your friends to see if any other mind-altering spells had been placed on them. Even spells such as the cheering charm could change someone's inhibitions.

Jayna was increasingly glad that she kept her wand on her at all times.

They stopped on the hill overlooking Hagrid's hut in the distance, shivering even in their heavy cloaks. It was a grey day, in looks and demeanour, and they felt, in that moment, utterly insignificant. Jayna's free hand absentmindedly played with her necklace, curling her fingers around her parents' wedding rings. Lydjah watched her hand for a second before looking back out at the grounds.

"Don't you think we're a little too young to be this fucked up?" Lydjah offered to the silence between them. Jayna's light laugh greeted her efforts and Lydjah felt the beginnings of a rueful smile curl her own lips. "Truth for truth?" She asked, after a time and Jayna tilted her head in agreement. Lydjah breathed in some of the cold air as she decided what to ask of her friend. "Do you think your grandfather raped you in the memories you haven't recovered yet?" She said, finally, needing to know.

Jayna kept her eyes on the trail of smoke leaving Hagrid's chimney as she answered, and shivered not entirely from the cold. "No." She clutched her rings tighter. "No. I was scared about it for a while, especially as each memory seems to get worse in how he tortured me… But it wasn't like that. The mind-controlling potion he made me take and burn myself… It was more of an experiment for use elsewhere than anything else. Big into making potions, the darker the better in his eyes. And though he had no qualms about torturing me and used it for punishment too, it was mostly to make the memories painful to recall, so I wouldn't want to. Sadistic but effective. Anyway; rape would have served no larger purpose so I don't think he did."

Lydjah nodded, and blew the breath she'd been holding into a visible cloud of steam. There was a long, quiet pause while Jayna mused over which truth to demand.

"Why don't you like people touching your neck?" Lydjah stiffened and relaxed all in one movement, shifting her weight onto the foot furthest from Jayna because of half-refined instincts she'd forced herself to develop in order to avoid her triggers. Apathy dripped into her voice the same way sadness often coated Jayna's, and mischief James'.

"The man that I killed." Lydjah began. Even with the mask of apathy, it was difficult to say. "He choked me while he raped me, to stop me from calling out for help. People touching the back of my neck, from behind when I can't see them-" She coughed lightly, but even that betrayed the lump in her throat. "It's triggering."

"I'm glad you killed him." Jayna replied eventually. The look Lydjah shot her was bleak.

"On my worst days, so am I."

AN: So the other thing was that I am not in any way trying to say with this chapter that I think all Christians are homophobic or abuse the Bible like Lien inadvertedly does. Lien's family is a little bit more messed up in a 'normal' way, as opposed to Jayna who has got some pretty unbelieveable backstory crap going on. Lien, as a character, is representative of the Muggle world, and I think we can all agree the Muggle world right now isn't great. Therefore; neither is Lien. Hope this makes sense.