Versus Undistorted, a Kingdom Hearts fanfic series by Raberba girl for Cherished Tenshi's 100 Song Theme Challenge

The Next Life: Deep Anxiety (theme 94) [rough draft]

Christmas 2014 special for sonicdisney (A-Sign-of-Insanity)

Summary: Dawn's hard work pays off when he's accepted into the most elite academy in Radiant Garden. So why is he freaking out so much when Riku asks him how his first day of high school went...?

o.o.o

Riku came home from work that day as tired as usual, though he decided to put off having a bath until later in the evening, when he could truly relax. For now, he just took a quick shower (or as quick as he could manage while dealing with a meter of hair and fighting deeply-instilled instincts to overwash it).

Afterward, he puttered around in the kitchen for a while, snacking a bit as he got things ready for dinner, then went to see if there was still enough cleaning solution left for the next time he wasn't too tired to do some of his share of the housework.

He paused when he noticed a glow coming from Dawn's room. Riku nudged open the door to peek inside. "Dawn?"

"Hi Riku," the fourteen-year-old responded dully, eyes still fixed on his tablet's screen.

"Why are you sitting in the dark?" Riku asked, snapping on the light switch beside him.

Dawn, still curled up with ear buds in and his tablet cradled close, mumbled something unintelligible.

"Have you been home all this time?"

"Mmmumblennmble."

"Stop mumbling, I can't understand a word you're saying."

"YES!" Dawn yelled.

"Can we seriously not have a real conversation unless I take your tablet away?"

Which led to more yelling and what was about to be a Keyblade battle before Riku mentioned something about expecting Dawn to still be hanging out with his friends in Radiant Garden - which was when Dawn unexpectedly shut down again. He dropped his Keyblade (which dissolved into sparkles before hitting the floor), shoved his tablet aside, climbed into bed, and curled into a tight ball beneath the covers.

"...Did something happen at school?" Riku asked warily.

"No!" Dawn yelled, his voice muffled.

"If nothing happened, you wouldn't be hiding in here and picking fights with me."

"I'm not hiding!"

"Dawn," Riku sighed, sitting down on the bed. He didn't move when Dawn complained "Ow" and struggled to shift out of the way. "You were the one who wanted to go to that school - you were looking forward to it. You worked so hard-"

"I know!" Dawn yelled, and Riku was startled to hear tears in his voice.

"...Dawn?" Riku gently shook a lump that he was pretty sure was Dawn's shoulder. "Hey. Talk to me."

"IT'S AN AWESOME SCHOOL!" Dawn screamed.

"...Okay."

"It's an AWESOME school. For AWESOME people," Dawn snarled.

"Whiiiiiich is why you made sure your grades were awesome enough for you to be accepted, right?" Riku said warily, still having no clue what the problem was.

"It's the best," Dawn choked out. "I love that school."

"Except for...?"

"I love it."

"Okay," Riku sighed. "I'm going to go make you something to eat." Back when Dawn was still little, Riku had figured out that food often improved his mood, and the same could be said even now, nine years later. Riku went to the kitchen to throw some sandwiches together, and was a little surprised when Dawn soon came to join him.

"Are you making sandwiches?" Dawn asked, almost anxiously.

"Yes."

"Can I help? Can I have one?"

"I'm making them for you, and of course you can help. Please do."

"I love that school," Dawn said as he unscrewed the lid of the peanut butter jar, still with that anxious note in his voice. "I really do. It's the best school ever."

"You're gonna do great there," Riku said. He was surprised when Dawn slammed the jar back down, pressed both fists against the countertop, and unleashed a wordless yell. "...You want ketchup on that sandwich?" he asked conversationally when Dawn's yell ended.

"Yes," Dawn mumbled.

"Even though it's a peanut butter sandwich?"

"Yes," Dawn said again impatiently, picking up a butter knife.

Riku passed over the ketchup and started layering slices of cold cuts and cheese on the pieces of bread in front of him. "Teenagers have disgusting taste buds."

"Whatever."

"...Are you going to get mad at me if I ask how your first day of high school went?"

"I'm not mad at you!" Dawn yelled.

"You should probably eat that sandwich."

Dawn bit into it savagely. From the noises he was making, Riku could tell that he was fighting back tears. Riku pretended not to notice. "This one's ready too, whenever you want it." He himself had already eaten and didn't want to spoil his appetite for dinner, so he started putting away things from the dish rack to kill time.

Once Dawn had gulped down a few mouthfuls and regained control, he said calmly, "School's great."

"Do you have any classes with Naminé and the others?"

"Y...Yes..."

"That's good. Makes it easier to study together."

"Yeah..."

"If you want."

"Uh huh."

"I mean, you could still study together even if your schedules were completely different."

"Yeah."

Riku gritted his teeth, trying not to let Dawn's typical teenagerness bother him. "Do you like your teachers?"

"Uh huh."

"Do your classes look interesting?"

"...Yup."

"If you're gonna make me do all the work in this entire conversation, should I just stop now?"

"..."

Riku sighed, then set a hand on Dawn's shoulder and looked him in the eyes. "Dawn, I'm proud of you for working so hard to accomplish your goal. I'm proud of you for recognizing your own value and doing what it took to get the kind of education you deserve. I already know you're going to do well, I am always here to help you if you need it, and- Why are you crying?!"

"I'm not crying!" Dawn shrieked, scrubbing at his eyes.

"Dawn, you do realize that I actually want you to be happy, right? And that it kind of bothers me that I can't seem to do anything but upset you?"

"Why do you have to be proud of me?!" Dawn cried. "Just because I did one thing right?!"

Riku stared at him. "Do you not want me to be proud of you or something?"

Dawn started to answer, didn't actually say anything, and gave him an agonized look.

"I think you just...need to calm down, Dawn. Nothing's ever nearly as big a deal as you think it is." 'Which is something I really, really, really hope you'll grow out of eventually.'

"I...I just...!"

"Do you want to go to a different school or something?"

"What?!"

"I'm just blindly throwing out suggestions here, Dawn!"

"You think I can't make it at that school?! You think I can't keep it up and I'll flunk out?!"

"I think you need to eat more of that sandwich."

Three sandwiches and a long, brooding silence later, Dawn found Riku again and hugged him and told him in a low, dull voice, "I'm your brother, Riku."

"Yeah," Riku said, patting his back and hoping this would be the end of it.

"I'm a Crescent."

"Um...that is our family name, yes."

"I can do this."

"Of course you can. Not because you're a Crescent, but bec-"

"Riku."

"What?"

"I promise I'll make you proud of me. If I don't...th-then you'll never have to see me again."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Riku snapped, alarmed.

Before Dawn had a chance to answer, there was a loud knock on the front door, and then whoever it was barged in before waiting for a response. "Hey, Dawn you loser," Kazé called, "where've you been all day?"

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, IDIOT?" Dawn shouted, rushing to fling his arms around Kazé in what would have been a friendly gesture if it wasn't so violent, "WE JUST SAW EACH OTHER HALF AN HOUR AGO." He was dividing frantic looks between Kazé and Riku.

Riku frowned as he approached. "Why did-?"

"Half an hour?" Kazé said in confusion.

"I had a really great time hanging out with you guys at McDuck's after school, huh?" Dawn said loudly to Naminé, who stared at him with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth. "I was just telling Riku all about the first day of school."

Kazé's eyes widened too. Then he said, "Riiiiight. Our first day of school. Together."

"Awesome, huh?" Dawn said quickly. "Peterson's class looks like it'll be a sinch."

"Uh, right. Yeah, and Naminé really got a kick out of you doing a face plant on the stairs at lunch," Kazé said with a grin.

"I did not-!" Dawn started to exclaim, then, with a frantic look at Riku, amended, "Not, um, where she could see...right, Naminé, you didn't see that...?"

"I didn't see that," Naminé said, in a very cautious sort of way.

Kazé, with his arm around Dawn, was now carrying on the strange conversation with relish. "And Taft really chewed you out when you said that Corona was the capital of the Land of Dragons, did you tell Riku about that yet?"

"Obviously I know that Corona's the capital of Rapunzel's Tower," Dawn said through gritted teeth. "I was just tired, but I'll ace that class whenever that guy gets around to teaching us actual lessons."

"Professor Taft is a woman," Naminé said in confusion.

Both boys shot her expressive looks. "HA HA, Naminé," Kazé said, "you're so cute. But Taft is ugly enough for an idiot like Dawn to mistake her for a dude, so..."

Naminé looked like she was trying very hard to stay silent.

"Dawn," Riku said.

"I really like the Academy," Dawn said quickly. "I'm gonna have a great time there."

"Just like today," Kazé added. "We had a blast hitting on those hot rich girls in the science lab, huh?"

"Y-You were the one hitting on them!" Dawn squeaked, shooting a frantic glance at Naminé. "I wasn't interested, Naminé, I swear!"

"You were in the science lab?" Naminé said in bewilderment.

"Dawn," Riku said again.

Kazé talked over him. "Duh! You just didn't notice because you come in the period after we do."

"Yeah," Dawn agreed immediately.

"But your schedule-"

"I had my schedule changed! At the last second!"

"Dawn, you skipped school today, didn't you," Riku said.

"I didn't! Kazé saw me there, right?!"

"He was there," Kazé said confidently. "Aaaaalllll day."

"Naminé," Riku said, "are you going to stand there and lie to my face, too?"

For a moment, the girl looked completely torn. Dawn's lips were moving in silent pleas, and Kazé was staring at her so intensely that his eyes were starting to change color.

At last, Naminé fell back on her secret weapon and burst into tears.

"Naminé!"

"Naminé!"

Both boys were instantly at her side. "Naminé, don't cry!"

"It's okay, you don't have to say anything!"

"Just stop crying, okay? Please please please please stop crying, I'll do anything you want, Naminé, what do you want? Tell me, I'll do it, I swear I'll do it!"

"Let's go get some ice cream, okay?"

Supporting her tenderly between them, the boys started to escort her out.

"Dawn," Riku called, "you stay."

"Can't," Dawn said instantly, "gotta take care of Naminé."

"Kazé is perfectly capable of keeping her company on his own."

"No," Kazé insisted, "Dawn has to come with us to make sure I don't steal his girl."

"Yeah," Dawn said frantically, "I can't trust this jerk around Naminé!"

Riku rolled his eyes. "Kazé, don't even try to pretend you're not head over heels in love with Xion."

"I can be in love with Xion and still steal Dawn's girl just for the fun of it," Kazé said loftily.

"You can't steal me from Dawn if I'm not his girlfriend," Naminé said dolefully.

Dawn's face went bright red. "I...uh...Naminé, will you, uh-"

"Seriously?" Riku said. "After two years, you're finally working up the nerve to ask her out - JUST so you won't have to admit to me that you played hooky today?"

"I didn't play hooky!" Dawn cried.

"Dawn," Naminé whispered. "Please don't..." The tears shimmering in her big blue eyes were genuine this time.

Dawn, looking like a cornered animal, shot frantic glances between her and Riku - then fled.

"Coward," Kazé remarked. He turned to Riku and started explain, "He got freaked out during orientation this morning and ran off-"

Riku was already hurrying after his young replica. When Dawn realized that he was being chased, he opened a dark corridor. Riku swore and managed to leap after him in time.

When they emerged in Agrabah, Dawn immediately opened another corridor and this time was able to escape before Riku could reach it - but Riku hadn't endured a lifetime of training and adventures for nothing. Zeroing in on the Jenova cells in his replica's body, he tracked Dawn through darkness and worlds and more darkness and more worlds until, when they'd tumbled into Beast's Castle for the second time, Riku hurled his Keyblade and trapped Dawn under a crystalline dome that was usually used as a shield against magical attacks.

Dawn frantically pounded at the barrier, and was just about to swing his Keyblade at it when Riku caught up and pounced, dismissing the shield. It dissolved into harmless shards around the grappling pair, and then Riku managed to get Dawn pinned against the stone wall. "Stop running!"

"Don't be mad at me!" Dawn cried, a dark corridor starting to open up behind him. Riku wrapped him in a restraining hold before he could sink into it, and Dawn sobbed as the corridor faded away. "Let me go!"

"First tell me what sort of mess I have to make you help clean up."

"I didn't do anything!" Dawn yelled, failing to kick off the walls because Riku hauled him away in time.

"Then why are you freaking out?"

"Don't!"

"Don't what?"

"Riku, don't...!"

Riku decided to start with the worst and work his way down. "Did you kill someone?"

"No!" Dawn cried, shocked.

"Did you revive Xehanort?"

"What?!"

"Did you make my father angry?" To his surprise and alarm, Dawn went limp and white-faced. Riku shakily let go, his heart pounding. "Okay...okay, Dawn, don't worry, we can do this, Sora's beaten him before, and we can get Cloud to help, w-we'll, we can-"

"Riku, are you scared?" Dawn asked in amazement.

"I'm, I'm not- I- Dawn, I swear I'll protect you, that's...pretty much what I've spent the last nine years-"

"He'll be that mad at me?" Dawn whispered, horrified.

Riku set his hands on Dawn's shoulders and said firmly, "I am not going to let anything happen to you, Dawn."

"It's my fault...if you get hurt, it'll be my fault..."

"What did you even do, Dawn?" Sephiroth tended to take little notice of Dawn, and if there had been some complaint, Riku would have expected his father to have come to see him about it already.

"I...I haven't...not yet...but..."

Riku stared. "Okay. Dawn?"

"Yes?" Dawn said apprehensively.

"Can you please just tell me what in the multiverse is going on here?"

"I..."

"Start with this morning. The last time I saw you, you were heading to the Garden with Kazé and Naminé. Did it happen after that?"

For a moment, Dawn just stood staring at his feet. Finally he said, in a mutter that Riku had to lean close to hear, "It was fine until orientation. I...I thought I could-" He suddenly raised his face and said despairingly, tears shining in his eyes, "I thought I could do it, Riku!"

"Ssshh, calm down. You were at orientation. It happened then?"

"They...they said...they said if our average ever falls below 80%...we get kicked out. Expelled."

There was a long silence. Riku slowly transitioned from waiting to hear the rest of the explanation to processing the fact that there was no more. He reached up very slowly and deliberately to massage his own temples. "So. Let me get this straight," he said at last.

Dawn, for whom the silence had almost grown unbearable, cringed at the sound of his guardian's voice.

"You skipped school. Picked fights with me. Lied. Made me chase you across the multiverse. Assume Sephiroth's going to come after us. Because you think you MIGHT POSSIBLY not be able to make decent grades at school?"

"I suck at everything," Dawn sobbed. "I can't be good no matter how hard I try, I can't make good grades unless I study my butt off, you're always so busy but you help me anyway but without you and Naminé I'd fail, it was so hard to get into the Academy, how can I keep it up for FOUR MORE YEARS?!"

As he angsted, Riku ambled over to a pot, smashed it, gathered up the released HP orbs, and was now sitting on a crate, eating the orbs and closing his eyes in order to better focus on the rush of health and happiness that accompanied each bite.

"I can't do it," Dawn wailed brokenly, coming to throw himself at Riku's feet, prop his arms on Riku's knees, and bury his face in them. Riku could now catch only muffled scraps of his laments. "Mumbleumble never happens mumble, nrrghhcan't ever eembleumble!" He suddenly lifted his head to gesture angrily and yell, "Naminé's gonna do fine because she's Naminé, and the others don't care if they flunk out, but I-!" He dove back into his arms and lapsed into semi-coherency again. "Kreechm omble hard mumble...!"

Riku had run out of HP orbs. When the high from the last one died down, he took hold of Dawn's head and lifted his face free. "Shut up."

Dawn immediately went quiet.

"Try, Dawn. Just try. If you make it, that would be wonderful. If you fail, that's okay. It's not a big deal. I'm upset with you for causing trouble instead of just telling me the problem, but as far as the Academy goes, I won't mind if you flunk out spectacularly."

"It's so expensive," Dawn whispered. "All that munny, I saw the tuition receipts in your desk, it'll all go to waste-!"

"I don't care, Dawn!" Riku hugged his little brother tightly. After a surprised moment, Dawn slowly returned the embrace and cried for a while. "It's okay," Riku whispered.

When Dawn could finally speak again, he gulped out, "But...I'm a C-Crescent...we're supposed to be better than everyone else - you're better than everyone else, you're perfect just like them, I'm a copy of you so why am I always, always failing-?!"

"Dawn!"

Dawn seemed to shrink apprehensively.

"Have I ever told you any of that crap?! You didn't get that from me, did you?!"

"It's obvious-!"

"After all these years of insisting you're your own person, why do you suddenly want to be a Crescent so badly?! I DON'T WANT you to be perfect, Dawn!"

"But I can be, if you just-!"

"No one is perfect, Dawn! Not me, not Sephiroth, NO ONE!"

"You've never lost a fight-"

"Do you have any idea what my childhood was like? My family abused me almost every single day of my life because they were trying to make me perfect! Do you think I wanted that for you?! Why do you think I nearly killed myself trying to get free from them?! I swore that you would never have to go through what I did, that you would never have to be perfect, Dawn!"

Dawn stared at him.

"All I wanted," Riku said, trying hard to keep speaking instead of giving in to tears, "was to be happy. I just want you to be happy, Dawn. Can't you at least give me that much? I don't care about the grades, I don't care about-" He lost the fight, unable to continue without crying.

After a moment, Dawn hugged him again. "I can't even give you that much," Dawn whispered.

"Then...I'm the one who failed, not you..."

"No, Riku," Dawn said desperately. "No, I...it's my fault, I can't even..."

After a long time, Riku sighed and gently stroked a hand through Dawn's hair as if he was a little boy again. "Dawn...you don't have to be happy. I mean, don't feel pressured to be happy, that's not- I just... Just do your best. That's all I want, Dawn; just try. If you fail, it's okay, I'll still be proud of you for trying."

Dawn stared at him, too choked up to speak.

"I promise," Riku said softly.

After a moment, Dawn climbed shakily to his feet and said, "I'm going to ace all my classes."

"You're going to do your best," Riku said, rising as well and putting an arm around his shoulders. "I'm going to be proud of you because you're going to give it your best shot."

"It's okay if Naminé makes better grades than me...it's okay if, if stupid Kazé makes better grades than me..."

"I'm sure Naminé will still like you anyway."

Dawn's face colored.

"I'll still like you, anyway."

"...This is just another battle," Dawn whispered. "I'm going to fight hard, and I'm going to win."

"You're going to fight hard, and I'll be there for you no matter what happens."

"...Riku?"

"Yeah?"

"I'd rather fight a giant Heartless than go to school..."

"Well, do your best at school and someday you'll be able to get a job fighting Heartless every day."

"Just like you."

"Sure."

"Is collecting synthesis materials more fun than taking over the worlds?"

"YES, Dawn. Seriously, have you been letting my mother try to brainwash you or something?"

"It wasn't brainwashing, we were just talking...!"

o.o.o

Author's Notes: In my headcanon, Riku's gotten over his resentment about Crescent hair by now and has let his grow almost as long as his dad's, though he also tries not to obsess over it the way he was raised to. XD

Kazé and Dawn now get along much better than they did when they were little. I have a story idea for how they became better friends, I just need to fine-tune the outline and find some time to actually write it.

If you're not familiar with my work - I usually don't write stuff in order; I'm sure there will eventually be more stories in this universe where the kids are still little. This particular story just happens to take place later in the timeline. Also, I'd recommend that you check my fanfiction indexes on WordPress if you want to read my other stories about Riku's family and/or the "Next Life" stories that crossover with How to Train Your Dragon.

Complete: 13/100