"How dare you?" Gibbs practically shrieked. His temper was well and truly unleashed the moment the conference room door slammed shut behind them. "What in the good hell was going through your skull when you decided to talk to DiNozzo and McGee that way?" He paced up and down in front of an uncharacteristically shocked looking Kate, feeling rage flood him. He'd been infuriated by Kate many times since she'd started on his team, but this was in a different league. This was beyond the pale and he was livid.

"Apparently, I hit my head on that damned plane when I hired you," he continued in a snarl, "Because if I had been in my right mind, I would never have offered a spoiled, bad tempered and downright superior little brat a place on my team. I don't care if you used to protect the damned Pope. I don't care if you personally end global warming, on my team, you do not berate your teammates. And I don't mean your usual sniping, I mean using experiences from both of those guys' pasts' and ramming it down their throats in spite. And all because you have a problem with me?"

He paced some more.

"If you have a problem with me madam, then you address it with me. Not my people. You do not use your profiling abilities to find out what would hurt them the most and throw it out there for every man and his dog to hear in the bull pen." He came to a stop in front of an ashen faced Kate and drew a staggeringly deep breath. "I've had it," he said quietly, an oddly horrifying calm overtaking him. "I'm done. I can't win with you, for the first time, I'm just stumped. This was a mistake. You don't belong here, not with me or my team."

He glanced towards the door.

"You should just consider this a learning opportunity that didn't work out and leave.

He bristled some.

"Now."

Kate Todd's world was falling apart around her as she felt her mouth fall open. Shaking her head wildly, she fought to remain calm. She was just beginning to find her feet at NCIS and the thoughts of leaving in disgrace and starting somewhere new were horrendous and abhorrent. Shock coated her as she digested Gibbs' fury. She had never, granted in a short period of time, seen him lose it like that. He was savagely sardonic and sharp tongued sure, but never had she witnessed the enraged yelling and pacing.

It made her heart beat erratically.

A part of her was already feeling thoroughly regretful about the way she had spoken to Tony and Tim. She knew enough of herself to know she was lashing out because she couldn't quite fathom the dynamics of Team Gibbs and forever felt the outsider. She recalled the deadening in their eyes as she had taunted them about their fathers and suddenly felt a bit sick. As annoying as Tony could be, she knew he was a solid agent and an even more solid partner. McGee, too. They had never done anything spiteful to her, and as her face reddened, she realised she hadn't returned the favour. As she looked up at Gibbs, she realised that if steam were to escape his nostrils, it wouldn't look out of place.

"Gibbs…"

He threw up his hands and shook his head.

"There is nothing else to say, Agent Todd," he said coldly, "Clearly this arrangement isn't going to work out. I'm not going to stand for it, and clearly you're not willing to adapt. My willingness to help you adapt is gone. No one speaks to my boys like that, no one. So…why don't you go on and clear out your desk and I wish you the best in your next job." He jerked his head towards the door. "My time is better spent elsewhere, I see that now, so let's not delay."

She felt a panic grip her, mingled in with a sense of viscous regret as she chewed her lip.

Opening her mouth, images of Tony and Tim standing mutely as her tirade lashed over them filled her mind. She closed her mouth. She had nothing to say. There was no justification. It would take time and a lot of thought to figure out why she had blown up like that. But in the moment, there was no taking it back. She felt the energy drain from her shoulders as she nodded silently. She turned to face the door before a certain sense of dignity gripped her.

"I know how you feel about apologies, but could I apologise to Tony and Tim before I go?"

Gibbs felt his mouth fall open.

"Jesus," he mumbled, "What is it with you? I can't keep up. You tear into those two for no reason not five minutes ago and now you want to go down there and say you're sorry? You think that's going to make a difference?" He shook his head in disbelief. "Kate, there are some things I will make allowances for and there are some things I won't. Deliberately hurting your teammates, with no rhyme or reason, when they would do anything for you, is something I won't make allowances for. I've put up with your attitude for a long time now, and I don't know why I have. It's done neither you nor me any favours. So no, you're not going to apologise to them. Because sometimes, sorry just doesn't cut it."

He walked across the room and opened the door.

"Out."

Kate felt her legs go slightly weak under her as she stood rooted to the spot. Her usual blustering confidence was deserting her in the face of Gibbs' raw rage. Standing mutely, she sucked in a staggering breath as she shook her head slowly. "Please," she said quietly, "I need to tell them I'm sorry. I don't know why…I don't…."

Gibbs slammed the door shut in frustration and marched to stand in front of her.

"You don't know why?" he thundered, "Well, let me help you out. I might not be as clever as you Kate, but I'll give it a solid effort. The reason you kicked off with Tony and Tim is because you couldn't reconcile the fact that the two of them are not weak or spineless. They're strong, but can accept my discipline. You couldn't reconcile the fact the two of them are grown, but can accept my discipline. You couldn't reconcile the fact that the two of them were capable of doing something that you are not."

He drew himself up to his fullest height.

"How did I do?"

She blanched as she looked at him, shock coursing through her. It seemed to strike a chord within her, his words. Her mother's voice echoed in her mind, from years past. Don't make the classic smart persons mistake of thinking there's no one smarter than you, Caitlin. She shook her head in an effort to rid herself of the disembodied voice as she bit down on her lip. Gibbs said nothing as the obvious bout of realisation thundered through the most difficult damned agent he had ever had. A trickle of his usual gruff caring was beginning to trickle through his anger and he attempted to brush it away.

Kate Todd was just an insurmountable challenge.

She needed to go.

She felt a knot of anxiety form in her stomach as she digested his unusually insightful words. She certainly knew that she had felt a certain wave of jealously when she had unleashed her vitriol upon her teammates. But it made no sense to her. It made no sense that she would be jealous of their ability to accept something she had no intention of ever accepting. But if there was anything she had learned on her short foray into NCIS, it was that more things made less sense than those that did. She cleared her throat and steeled herself one last time.

"Please let me try," she asked quietly, looking Gibbs directly in the eye. "Please let me try and apologise to them. I know that I'm done here but please don't force me to leave without at least trying to make things right with them." Her eyes took on a deep quality that Gibbs hadn't seen from her before. "Gibbs…I've made a lot of mistakes with a lot of people in my life, can I have the chance to fix them… if I can? With DiNozzo and McGee?"

She bit back the "and you."

She knew it was pointless.

Gibbs knew what she clamped back and despite his fury, he found it curious.

"What mistakes do you think you've made with me?" he questioned quietly, "Because I've tried and tried to…show you the error of your ways, but you've essentially told me you're perfect. That I have nothing to teach you, because you know it all. You used to protect the President, so what could little old me have to offer you? Why the sudden change of heart?" He held up a sardonically apologetic hand and shook his head. "My bad, I suppose any reference to the heart in a conversation with a woman is chauvinistic etc etc?"

She flinched despite herself as she pushed away more of her mother's warning words.

"Well I suppose it doesn't matter," Gibbs continued icily, "The damage is done. Give me five minutes to get the guys out of the bull pen and then come down and empty out your desk." He looked at her and a certain sadness overtook him. He had never flat out failed with anyone before, even the most difficult of people. And Kate…she had so much potential, but she was without doubt her own worst enemy and that left very little to work with. He sighed and shook his head.

He couldn't help but feel a little disappointed nonetheless.

And it wasn't in her alone.

It was in himself, too.

He turned to leave but he didn't make it as far as the door when her voice rang out behind him.

"I've never really fit, anywhere. Never really….belonged."

He slowly turned back to face her and raised a brow. He said nothing but he didn't discourage her. She spoke almost to herself as she looked straight ahead and for the very first time in a long, long time, appraised herself honestly. It was one of the rare times when she didn't push away her mother's all knowing voice, it was one of the rare times when she used it as a guiding tool.

She felt a certain lightness in the appraisal.

"I've always found it hard to be…a team player. I always need to be the best, better than anyone because then you're indispensible you know. Competitive by nature, but I take it too far. I know that. I've never stayed in one place for too long, burned bridges and all that. I guess…when I saw Tony and Tim in the bullpen after you'd…" she glanced quickly at Gibbs and then back away again, "Uhh…punished them, and they still defended you, I couldn't understand it. I couldn't understand that loyalty, that protectiveness…"

Gibbs raised a brow.

"That's the whole point, Kate," he muttered quietly, thrown by her sudden openness. "I run a team that's more than a team. We do a dangerous job and I can't have my people being backed up by others who are there because they have to be. You need to care about the people you do this job with." He felt uncomfortable for a moment but he pushed through, gruffness entering his tone. "You think what you think about me and that's ok, but I care about those boys. I'd do anything for them, absolutely anything."

He shrugged.

"And they, me. That's the way it works. That's the way it is."

She turned to him slowly, seemingly finding it safe to look at him now and he instantly saw confusion splashed across her face.

"But you beat them? How can you care about them and beat them?"

Gibbs sighed. He walked slowly towards Kate who to her credit didn't back down, didn't move away. He stopped right in front of her and she instantly smelled his clean, woody scent. It irked her no end that that scent provided a certain comfort and calm for her. He looked down at her with an incomprehensible look in his eyes. "Do I have your permission to touch you for one second?" he asked seriously, and she knew he wasn't joking.

Her eyes widened.

But there was something intoxicating about the trust that Gibbs engendered in people.

And in that moment, she trusted him.

She nodded.

He didn't move for a moment, conscious of the risk he was taking and unsure if was even worth it. As usual, the paternal instinct took over as he reached out and gently cupped Kate's upper arm in his own. Turning her to the side slightly, he quickly landed a sizeable swat across her behind before instantly letting her go and stepping right back out of her space.

He tilted his head at her shocked expression, the slight crack ringing around the room.

"That's all I do to the boys," he explained simply, "Sometimes I use a belt, if they're really out of line. Which happens a lot, it's to be expected." He zeroed in on her facial expressions. "Do you feel like I've just beaten you? Do you feel like I was out of control, just trying to hurt you?" He shook his head. "Kate, I hate having to tear the boys up. I try and put it off until I can't. I don't do it when I'm mad, I don't do it for no good reason. I do it because sometimes they need it and I'd rather they had a sore ass than a premature casket or a pink slip. I'm a military man and these are a military ways."

He shrugged his shoulders.

"And if you think that makes me an abusive son of a bitch, well…there's nothing I can do about that."

His gaze was suddenly fierce and soft all at the same time.

"But believe me when I tell you Caitlin, my people are my priority. Above all else. Always."

Kate felt her mouth fall open as she truly saw Gibbs, perhaps for the very first time. When she eventually spoke, her words didn't carry their usual air of confidence but they did carry sincerity. She forced herself to look up and lock gazes with Gibbs as she took in a shuddering breath. There was something she needed to say and it wasn't something she was accustomed to saying. But it was important she way it, for a variety of reasons. She didn't realise and nor would she ever know the impact of her simple words on Gibbs, but she did know the impact they had on her.

They humbled her.

"I was wrong."

….

A/N: One more chapter and done.

…