Chapter 3 - Beginnings of Betrayal
Emma pulled up at the curb just as Maddy and Jared stepped out the front door.
"You know you want to…" Jared said, his voice light, teasing, yet somehow not—not completely.
Maddy's heartbeat stuttered and she felt her palms go a little slick. The wolf was itching to break free and put this uber-confident human male in his place. The human side of her won out though.
"Look…you said that we'd take this at my pace, remember? My rules."
"Exactly, but do you really want your mom making you join some stupid club? If you kiss me in front of her now, she'll know you have at least one friend. One good friend." Maddy almost hated the laughter in his eyes. Almost. Her eyes darted back and forth as she bit her lip, considering. If she kissed him, maybe her mum would back off and not let her all-consuming worry keep eating away at her. She could withstand one kiss, surely, if it was for the good of the pack.
It doesn't have to mean anything Maddy told herself.
"This is just a one-off, don't even think about using it to your advantage. We are NOT dating for real."
Making her warning clear, Maddy strained on her tiptoes. Their lips touched, his enthusiasm taking her off guard as Jared cupped her face, deepening the kiss for a few memorable heartbeats. Too soon the moment vanished, and Maddy pulled away before her wolf lost control to snarl its way between them. She was panting as if she'd just run an up-hill kilometer, and her lips tingled not in the wolfblood way but from something unmistakably human—craving one more touch.
"Gotta go. Bye," she mumbled, whirled around and ran to the SUV. As she hopped in Maddy didn't miss Emma's appraising look before her mum pulled into the street as the engine purred.
For a little while there was just the sound of window wipers. A misty rain had started to pelt Swan Hill, and the mood it set would have fit Maddy's demeanor perfectly just a few hours ago. Now though…she didn't know what she felt. She still felt sad, disappointed, like half of her heart had been torn out. But she also didn't feel nearly as alone as she once had, and she felt distracted too. Who was Jared Aimsley? More importantly, what in the world had she just agreed to? Fake dating someone!?
Maddy Smith have you completely lost it? If she didn't understand it how would she put up a convincing façade in front of her mum?
Sure enough, Emma couldn't leave anything alone either. Mums…sometimes they were too predictable, wolfblood or not.
"So, how did the studying go?"
"Fine." Maddy caught herself. That answer wouldn't do. It would only invite more questions. "Actually, it was better than I expected."
Emma nodded, trying to hide the knowing look on her face. "I gathered as much. You and Jared seem to get along well." She stopped there, but her wolfblood daughter could tell that she sorely wanted to say so much more.
Ugh. I might as well get this out now rather than invite a full-scale interrogation. Maddy looked at her mum shyly until she could gather the strength to force out the words.
"Jared asked me out."
"Did he?" And…nothing.
"Well? Aren't you going to say anything?"
"Were you expecting anything in particular, sweetheart?"
Maddy rolled her eyes, tossing a raiment of hair back from her face as she wrinkled her nose. "God, Mum. You're so obvious. I know you have an opinion. You don't have to play coy. I can take it."
As the SUV engine whined struggling up the steep incline, Emma kept her eyes on the road.
"It doesn't matter what I think, Mads. What do you think?"
Maddy grudgingly shot her mum a grateful look. When she said things like that the teenage girl saw Emma as almost tolerable.
"I'm confused still." Guilt spiked through her chest, and Rhydian's face came unbidden to her mind. She felt like she'd just betrayed him. "I mean, I said yes. I think he's a good person. I could sense that much, and everyone likes him. I'm flattered that he's interested in me."
Emma cocked a withering look at her daughter. "Don't you ever think he's too good for you, Maddy Smith. Any boy would be lucky to have you on his arm, and that's a fact."
Maddy groaned. "Okay Mum! I get it. Can we talk about something else please?"
That was teenage code for 'Be quiet Mum' and silence reigned for the rest of the drive. Maddy was relieved for it. Her mind felt like a ball kicked back and forth between two players, guilt and curiosity pirouetting in a dance that left her emotionally depleted by the time they arrived home. Night had fully swooped in, the moon an impressive thumbnail of eldritch light above the clouds. As Emma pulled into the drive she patted her daughter on the knee.
"I'm proud of you, Mads, making new friends. You're stronger than you think."
The wolfblood girl didn't say a thing. Once she'd slipped inside she changed into something less constricting and told her parents she needed to go out for a run. They knew better than to try and stop her.
For at least one hour and the better part of the next Maddy's inner wolf used the forest behind their house as her own personal playground. She leapt up the boughs of the pine trees, howling at the moon in human form. She ran and darted between huge overturned rocks, scaring and scattering the nocturnal fauna in the hollows. She ran wherever instinct asked, with only the wind threading through her hair, keeping her form human even as she let the wolf taste the antidote of nature and freedom—finding that beautiful break from the mundane.
By the time Maddy returned, rain-soaked and panting in her running shorts and dark purple mesh shirt, her parents were nowhere to be seen and just one lonely light from the living room still lit the downstairs. Maddy tromped up the stairway to the spare bathroom, hurriedly threw off her clothes and started the bathwater. As the mirror began to steam up she slid into the growing pool of welcoming heat, spreading her arms out along either side of the tub as she tipped her head back and closed her eyes.
She usually preferred showers to baths, but when her mind felt burdened there was something about a bath that just appealed more.
Ahhh…What have I done? If only Shannon were here I'd ask her what I should do. Shannon, her geeky, glasses-wearing friend, a walking stereotype who defied that same stereotype with her courage. She had been Maddy's friend since early grade school, and she'd also been one of the first to sense what Maddy really was. Even after discovering Maddy's wolfblood secret, Shannon had stayed loyal and kept her secret like the truest friend.
It made an uncomfortable realization intrude on Maddy's thoughts. I wonder, if I had never had friends like Shannon and Tom, good human friends—would I have grown to hate all humans? As she sat soaking in the tub she reflected grimly that hatred of humans wasn't so far-fetched. After all, it was human selfishness and insatiable greed that had driven Dr. Whitewood to uncover Maddy and her family. It was because of humans that her family had been forced to flee their ancestral home in Stoneybridge.
Why shouldn't she hate them all, especially given the threat they posed?
It was an unsettling train of thought though, and Maddy cast it aside—just as there came a knock at the bathroom door.
"Maddy, can I come in?"
Her dad's apologetic tone almost made Maddy smile. Wolfbloods didn't have the same hang-ups about modesty that humans did. It probably had a lot to do with the fact that changing into wolf form every full moon didn't exactly leave room for silliness. Wolves were au naturale—just as nature made them. There was no being ashamed of that. For a wolfblood on some deepest level it was impossible to tell where the human ended and the wolf began.
"Come in." She looked up at his equally apologetic face as he sat down on the tiled floor of the bathroom. From his angle he could see just the upper portion of her face, his daughter's nose and eyes.
"I hate to interrupt you, but this is important and I wanted to tell you while your mum was still asleep on the couch."
Forget alarm bells, this had giant emergency gongs clanging inside Maddy's head. Her parents never kept secrets from each other, even little ones. This wasn't like her dad…
"Dad, what's going on?"
"Since the next full moon is coming up next weekend I thought we could make a trip of it, drive up to Banff National Park. I know it's been hard, bottled up in this small town where everyone seems to know everyone, where we have to keep the wolf in each of us on a tight leash—no pun intended." Maddy rolled her eyes and suppressed a groan but her toes were wiggling with excitement and she tried not to give herself away. "Anyway, what I'm getting at is, see here, I know this idea is not going to go over very well with your mum. So, before I broach it with her I want you to give me your sincere feedback. Would you be up for something like that?"
It was all Maddy could do not to leap out of the tub and squeeze her dad in a wolfy hug. To run free in her true wolf form under the full moon, to fully unleash all of her senses and move as one with her pack…. She nodded eagerly.
"Yes. It would be perfect, Dad. I love the idea. You really think you can get Mum to go for it?"
Daniel shrugged. "When it involves my daughter's happiness, you might be surprised how persuasive I can be." He grinned. "Besides, Banff covers a huge area of wilderness. It won't be hard to stay off the beaten path and away from prying human eyes. If we're careful I think we'll find roaming there to be much safer than chancing an outing near Swan Hill."
Maddy nodded with understanding. They couldn't risk roaming in wolf form near the very humans they might see day in and day out.
"OK, it's settled then. I'll make the arrangements." Daniel stood up, rubbing his hands together as he turned to leave.
"Wait."
Daniel paused.
"Can I ask you something?" Maddy felt uncomfortable, and her gaze dropped to the shimmering reflection in front of her rather than meet her dad's eyes.
"Sure, honey. What is it?"
"I'm assuming Mum told you about Jared."
Daniel nodded, scratching the back of his head. This clearly wasn't the most comfortable territory for a father-daughter conversation, and another spell of awkward silence filled the space.
"Do you think I'm betraying Rhydian?" There it was, blurted out raw and unvarnished—the worry gnawing at Maddy's heart.
Daniel sighed. "I can't speak for Rhydian." He paused, waiting until his daughter met his pointed look. "And I trust that you'll be careful with Jared. He can't know what you are, Maddy. Not ever. Shannon and Tom were different. They had grown up with you since you were all little. You know that."
"Yes, I know." She nodded, but a sudden anchor seemed to solidify in her chest. She wiped at her face as the caustic thought erupted in her mind. Thanks, Dad. It's nice to know you trust me.
"Look, Maddy, I'm sorry. I know that wasn't the answer you were looking for, but it was the honest one. I think Rhydian would understand that right now you and he are living in separate worlds. For all intents and purposes we may as well be on another planet. He doesn't know where we are or even how to contact us, and for everyone's safety that's what's best…certainly until we can be sure that Dr. Whitewood is no longer a threat.
"Until then I think it's important that you live your life, Maddy. You and Rhydian are young, and I can't pretend to know what will happen between you. But you can't put your entire life on hold for Rhydian's sake. You have to live, Maddy. That's all I can tell you."
After Daniel had left Maddy brought her knees to her chest and hugged her arms around them. The water temperature had already started to plummet, and soon it would be more lukewarm than hot. She mulled over Daniel's answer, wondering what Rhydian was doing at this exact moment, a tiny painful throb inside her yearning to know.
Maddy decided that honest answers were sometimes way overrated.