Disclaimer: I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.
Summary: Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry. With talk of Harmony and Dramione.
Three is a Crowd
The next couple of weeks floated past me and I was on an extreme high from the time I spent with Draco. We hadn't done anything else really, but he kept wanting my company and I kept giving it. It was win-win for both of us. But I still wasn't secure in what he wanted from me. We'd be very affectionate without crossing lines, and I wanted so badly to just cross the line already! But Draco would always stop it and pull back the reigns like he was keeping a prized quarter horse at bay. And I was getting tired of being reeled in. But what was I supposed to do? I couldn't act before I really knew how he felt. And he wasn't giving anything away. Except for today. And it wasn't at all what I was expecting from him. It was a huge red warning flag for me to get my head out of my ass and stop dreaming of him. He asked Hermione out and she said yes. Yes! Can you fucking believe it? To say I was none too pleased with either of them would be putting it mildly. But in their defense they didn't know how I felt. To them, they were just doing whatever it was regular people did, like go on dates with people they fancied. Only I wondered when Hermione started fancying Draco. And I asked her as much.
"So how long have you wanted to shag him huh?" I asked in a snippy tone as she was getting ready to go out with my beloved.
"Harry, I'm not shagging him. It's a date. I finally got tired of him asking me and figured, what the hell? He's not so bad and frankly without the prospect of you and I getting together on the horizon, I figured why not?" she explained as she pulled on her heels and stood in front of the mirror.
"I don't want you to go," I pouted. This was a disaster.
"Why not? I thought you and Draco were like best friends these days," she sighed.
"We are. Kind of. Except he didn't tell me this," I lamented.
"I asked him not to. I wanted to tell you. But I didn't think you'd care that much."
"Well I do."
"Well please get over it because I want to have a little fun. I never do! Just let me have some fun. It's not like you want me," she tossed in with a slightly snide attitude in her voice.
"That's a low blow, Hermione," I said, addressing her comment about me not wanting her.
"It's true though. I realize it's not your fault entirely, but I waited for you for months. Years actually. And now you say you're gay or something. But part of me thinks you're just afraid of women. You always have been. And I want to be with someone who's not afraid of them," she snapped back at me.
What she was saying wasn't really fair. My mixed up lust for the male species wasn't my fault. But she did have a point that women scared me. They did. A lot. Hermione especially sometimes because she was so bold and honest and no holds barred. She never sugar coated anything with me, and she wasn't going to start doing it now.
"Fine. Go be with Draco. Just be careful okay? He's a player," I said truthfully. He played me like a fiddle and now it was Hermione's turn.
"I won't get played."
"Yeah right," I muttered under my breath.
"What?"
"Nothing. I'm going for a walk. I'll see you later," I said quickly and practically took off running out the door.
I just needed air. And I wasn't sure what I was more upset over. Hermione telling me I was afraid of women, or Draco somehow betraying me by taking out my best friend. But then I realized no one betrayed me because Draco was my friend too. That's it. They were both my fucking friends and instead of being happy for them, I was angry at them both. I wanted Draco to acknowledge we had something more going on, and I wanted Hermione to be quiet about my fear of women. I wanted to prove to her that I wasn't afraid of them, that I was really gay. It wasn't a copout. I was so upset I didn't know what to do. What if Draco and Hermione fell in love and got married? I'd throw myself off a bridge, I think. I just couldn't fathom the two of them together. All the progress I felt I'd made with Draco had just ended. If he felt anything for me at all, he wouldn't be going out with Hermione. My best friend of all people. It's like he was trying to torture me. And I wasn't going to stand for it.
I stewed over this long and hard and I knew their date was in progress the entire time I sat and turned colors over how angry I was. I knew where they'd gone and could just burst in there and ruin the date. But then I'd look like a complete moron and an asshole. So I had to wait it out and at least pray Hermione came home after and didn't go to his place. That was reserved for me. Not her. To think of them cuddling on our couch made me sick inside. But then I realized it wasn't really our couch and we weren't a couple. But we should be! At least I think so. I wasn't sure I could make it through the evening but finally Hermione and Draco both showed up at our place. I was in the kitchen so they didn't see me right away, but I was peeking through the door and listening to them talk.
"So it was a lovely time," Hermione said as she tossed her purse to the table and smiled at Draco.
"It was lovely. I'm so glad you decided to say yes finally," he smiled at her.
"You were persistent," she giggled. Ugh. A girlish giggle? They were so gonna kiss and I knew it.
Before it could happen I burst through the door.
"Hello guys! Good to see you again! Did you have fun?" I asked as cheerfully as I could muster.
I startled the shit out of them both and it took them a moment regain their composure.
"Harry! You're here. I thought you'd gone out," Hermione said in a slightly clipped tone.
"I did, but I got back ages ago. Figured I'd wait up for you two crazy kids," I smiled a slightly deranged looking smile.
"That's nice of you, but we're fine. You can skedaddle away now," Draco said giving me a glare and pleading with me silently to leave them alone. I wasn't having any of it.
"I have no place else I need to be. Why not tell me about the date? How was dinner?" I said plopping down on the couch and staring up at them.
"It was fine," Hermione said with a slight nod.
"Great! So I guess since it's late, Draco probably should go now huh?" I yawned and stretched and looked right at him.
"Actually I'm not tired at all. But you apparently are. So run along to bed, Harry. Leave us be. Good night," Draco said giving me the evil eye.
"You know what? I am a little tired. We should call it a night, Draco. But I really did have fun. Thanks," Hermione smiled at him as she touched his arm affectionately. That was my move. I created that move! And there she was using it on him.
"Alright. If you're sure. I thought you said we could have a nightcap?" Draco inquired.
"I didn't realize Harry would be up and here. In our faces. Maybe another time?" she offered giving me a stern look and I realized she was only getting rid of Draco so she could properly yell at me. She wasn't doing this as a favor or because I wanted their date to end. She was going to rip me a new asshole and I had it coming. I braced for impact.
"Okay. Another time. Good night Hermione," Draco said and leaned over and gave her cheek a small kiss. He gave me a death glare too and then he headed out the door. I looked at Hermione once the door shut behind him.
"So, he finally took the hint, eh?" I said, realizing I was digging myself a larger hole than I already had dug.
"What the hell is your problem Harry? Why did you do that?" she asked as she beat me over the head with a couch pillow.
I held up my hands to ward off the assault but she managed to knock my glasses off my face and mess up my already jacked up hair.
"Stop!" I cried. "I'm sorry. It's just did you see the look he gave you? Like he was going to take you to bed? I was saving you! I deserve an award! Friend of the year!" I said defensively.
"Friend of the year, my arse! Maybe I wanted him to bed me? I haven't had a good shag since Ron and I broke up almost two years ago! A girl has needs!" she shouted at me as she flung the pillow across the room.
"I didn't know you had needs like that," I admitted, thus proving I didn't understand women at all. I figured it was just men who needed sex to be happy.
"You're an idiot then! Of course I do! I thought maybe tonight I'd get some at least but you ruined it. Do you hate me that much? Why are you acting this way?" she wondered sadly.
"I'm sorry. I guess I just don't trust Draco around you, is all. I don't want you to get hurt," I said honestly, even if it wasn't my main motivation.
"I'm a big girl Harry. I can take care of myself. And Draco was honestly a gentlemen the entire night. I kind of like him," she admitted with a sigh. "I hope you didn't ruin it for me."
"I'm sure I didn't. Draco just thinks I'm a jerk probably. He'll yell at me and then it'll be fine," I sighed right back at her.
"You kind of deserve to be yelled at, you dork. Why would you try and protect me from him anyway?"
"Because he is my friend and I hear the shit he says about you. And he's kind of a pig, which you've said so yourself in the past. I guess that's why it startled me to see you two going out," I admitted.
"I know he's a pig sometimes, but I don't care right now. I'm in desperate need of some male company, Harry. And let's face it, Draco is hot," she said with a grin and a chuckle.
I chuckled right back and had to agree with her. I mean that was the whole reason for this debacle in the first place. My jealousy. But I looked up at Hermione with my best 'forgive me' look.
"Are you still mad at me?" I asked.
"Yes. But I'll get over it. I appreciate that you were concerned though. It's just I don't need an overprotective big brother."
"But I like being that to you," I smiled at her.
"Yeah, I know. But you also know I'm perfectly capable of handling myself and weeding out the bad apples."
"But Draco is so charming that it's almost impossible to know if you're being played. Trust me."
"Maybe I wanted to be played with? Ever think of that? Sometimes a girl just wants a good shag and doesn't need a marriage proposal," she said with a smirk.
I laughed and shook my head.
"God I'm so lame. I'm the oldest living virgin and I don't know a damn thing about women or their needs. I honestly thought you could live without sex forever and be happy."
"Please! No way. I mean, I'm going for a record of having a dry spell, but it's not by choice. I was holding out for you, but that didn't work out. So now maybe I just want someone really hot to give it to me good," she said with a devious look in her eyes.
"Stop! The imagery is too much! I can't envision you doing that with Draco. Ugh. Yuck. No," I held up my hands.
"You could have given it to me, but you chose not to. So remember that," she told me as she poked my side.
"I would not have been able to give it to you the right way. Or at all. Trust me. I'm hopeless. I'm probably never going to get laid," I lamented sadly.
"Sure you will. Someday. Just maybe with a guy right? That is what you said you wanted."
"It is. I think. I'm fairly sure, yes. It's just complicated."
"How so? Dating is dating. You have to put yourself out there. And from what you told me about your gay bar experience, you totally did not put yourself out there. You were super closed off and aloof."
"I know. I was. But I kinda sorta like a specific person. I'm holding out for them," I explained.
"Yeah, Draco told me that. Who is it Harry? Tell me!" she said plopping down next to me on the couch. "We could double date or something."
"I don't think so," I shook my head.
"Why not?"
"Because it just wouldn't work out. And besides I don't want you to see Draco again," I pouted slightly.
"Well too bad. I'm gonna see him again if he wants to take me out. And next time, I won't have you ruin it!" she said shoving me playfully and leaning her head against my shoulder.
She'd obviously forgiven me but I was still upset about what was going on. But how could I explain why? I had no real claims to Draco. And he obviously didn't want to be with me if he was really taking Hermione out. But I wanted him to want me. And I didn't want her to get in the way . I felt like it was better when she wouldn't give him the time of day. But there was nothing I could do. I just had to sit back and watch them date. Yuck. I hated that plan.
Hermione kissed my cheek and announced she was going to bed. I watched her go up the stairs and I just sat on the couch and wondered what I should do since I'd already established there wasn't anything I could do. But maybe I could seduce Draco like he taught me to do? Except it probably wouldn't work and I'd end up looking like a fool. But just then there was a knock at the door. I got up to answer it and grabbed my wand. It was rather late for visitors, so I didn't want to be too careless.
"Who is it?" I called out, not wanting to get too close to the door just yet.
"It's me, you moron!" Draco called out. "Open up or I'm blasting the door open."
Fuck. I wasn't ready to see him again yet. What was he doing here? Hoping to run upstairs and lock himself in with Hermione before I could stop him? I wasn't sure, but I opened the door cautiously and looked at him.
"What do you want, Malfoy?" I said trying my hardest to be indifferent.
"What do you think I want, Potter? I want an explanation. Where's Hermione?" he asked gruffly.
"She's upstairs. Sleeping. Alone. So don't bother her."
"I'm not going to bother her. I'm going to bother you. What was the deal earlier? Why did you fuck up my shit? You know I've been dying to go out with Hermione for months and you ruined my chances at a fun night," he said unhappily as he marched past me and stood in the living room with his hands on his hips.
"I didn't trust you. You've told me so many times how you wanna fuck her brains out that I couldn't deal with you being near her," I admitted truthfully.
"So what if I want to fuck her brains out? Did it ever occur to you that maybe she wants them fucked out?" he asked with exasperation.
"No," I said in a small voice. I now realized this was the case, but I still didn't feel like telling him that.
"Well maybe you should have thought of it. She'd been giving me signals all night and then wham! There you were bollocksing up my entire evening. I thought we were mates!"
"We are! But so is Hermione to me. I'm looking out for her. And I don't trust you with women."
"Fuck you then. That's not friendship. Friends help friends get laid. That's what I've tried to do to you! It's not my fault you're the worst student in the world when it comes to learning how to be smooth. But friends don't fuck up each other's games," Draco said with irritation.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have meddled. If it was another girl I wouldn't have said anything." This wasn't a lie. I probably wouldn't have said anything. But I'd still be jealous. But in this case I really was worried for Hermione.
"Did it ever occur to you that I like Hermione? She's interesting and smart and funny. Sure I wanna shag her, but I really do like her," he said honestly.
"I wish you didn't," I said softly.
"Why?"
"Because."
"Because why?"
"I don't know. It just complicates stuff, that's all."
"How does it complicate anything? I thought you'd be happy actually. I mean, then the three of us could all hang out together and it would be fun," he said with a smile.
The three of us together was the last thing I wanted in actuality. I wanted Draco for myself. Sharing wasn't my strong suit right now. I wanted Draco to be mine. But sadly he wanted to be Hermione's instead. And now no one wanted me because I'd shut Hermione down. So now I was dateless and desperate and probably would die a virgin. I guess I had it coming. I just held my head in my hands and sat on the couch. Draco walked over and sat next to me.
"What's wrong?" he asked curiously, touching my shoulder.
"Nothing. It's just I don't want to be the third wheel. I'm always the third wheel. It was like that with Ron and Hermione too. I'm sick of it," I admitted.
"You're not a third wheel."
"Yes I am. For once I want someone all for me. Just for me. No one else."
"Who are you talking about? Me or Hermione?" he wondered with a raised eyebrow.
"I don't know. Either or. Both. It doesn't matter," I rambled nonsense at him.
"If you want me all to yourself, you know I'm always going to be your friend if you need one. And Hermione feels the same. If you want alone time, just tell one of us to fuck off. Only I'd say it nicer than that. But you catch my drift. Besides, I'm not marrying Hermione. I went on one date with her and I want to shag her senseless at least once. That might be all there is to it. She could kick me to the curb afterwards," he tried to reassure me.
"She'd never do that. I'm more worried of you doing that to her. But still. I don't know. I guess three just seems like a crowd," I told him with a sigh.
"We really need to find you a man. Desperately. Then you won't be this annoying and mopey about everything," he patted my back and leaned over next to me.
"Easier said than done."
"God you are so pathetic sometimes. Look tomorrow we'll hang out okay? We'll do whatever you want. But on one condition," Draco told me seriously.
"What's that?" I was intensely curious.
"You stay out of my private life with Hermione."
Ugh. Anything but that. I wasn't sure if I could do it. But the prospect of spending an entire day with him alone doing anything I wanted sort of won out. So I nodded my head.
"Okay. Deal. But I have a condition too," I piped up.
"What?"
"Break her heart, and I break your face. I don't care if we are friends. I mean it, Malfoy," I said in my most menacing voice.
"Got it. I won't break her heart. But what happens if she breaks mine?" he inquired.
"I'll give her a stern talking to. I can't really break her face because she's a girl. But I'd stick up for you!"
"Okay then. So think about what you wanna do tomorrow and I promise you'll have me all to yourself. But now, I'm tired. So I'm going back home. See you around noonish tomorrow?" he offered.
"Yeah, sounds good." I nodded.
"Good."
"Draco?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry I fucked up your night."
"Water under the bridge. See you tomorrow."
And with that, he was gone. I'd have to wait to see him and I had no idea what we'd do, but the important thing was that I'd have him all to myself for the day. I couldn't ask for more. I just had to think of something really good we could do. I went to bed that night thinking of nothing but his face and how I'd almost ruined my friendships with him and Hermione tonight. I needed to stop being such a dipshit. But it was hard. I loved them both. I just didn't want them to be together. I wanted Draco for myself. And in a perfect world, I'd get him. Too bad this wasn't a perfect world. But maybe one day it would be.
To be continued….