Five hours was the perfect amount of driving time for a road trip. Five hours was just enough time to sink into the road and get comfortable, to get through a good chunk of your audiobook, if you're listening to one, or to sing your way through all of your absolute favorite albums.

Five hours was a perfect amount of time to get your head on properly and to let your excitement build.

Eight was not.

Eight was just long enough to have lost your mind entirely. Eight hours was just long enough to have gone from a sweet, peaceful driver to a raging ball of redheaded fury, slamming on the horn even though the car in front of you was just as stuck as you were.

Eight hours was long enough for your nervous excitement to morph into worry and fear: what if they don't like me anymore...what if I'm so late that I miss them...how will I spend this time with them and then just go back to my life like normal?

Eight hours was enough to drive you nuts; especially when you were not even there yet. Especially when you still had two hours according to your phone's GPS and you knew you were going to be very, very late.

'****'

"Naw, naw, naw, Bex, you don't get it, man. I don't mean like the way that Lou Bega sang it when we was chitlins but like, ghetto style, you dig?"

"I don't-" Beca was sitting at the soundboard with her face in her palms, stumbling over her words because, really? They were doing this again? Really? "How many - ugh - we've been over this, Clay. Copyright laws. You can't just - sing someone else's freaking song. Plus, it's not his image, nothing about it is original, and you're not my client! Clay! So - just go over there." Oh my god, did she really just send someone to sit in the corner? What the - what the hell was happening to her?

"Awww, come on Bex. 'A little bit'a Shanti in my life, a little bit'a baby mama by my side, a little bit'a-"

"Dude, I can't. No. I can't let him sing about his baby mama; his wife would kill me. I just - I can't - ughh!"

"We could get him the hat, you know, that pimp ass Fedora and-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa now." EZ took a deep cleansing breath that clearly everyone was supposed to copy, "You piss off House Bex and I'ma find my ass out on the street, ya hear? And that means no more parties for you, bro." He turned back to Beca with, what she knew was supposed to be, his sweetest smile, "Look, lil' mama, why don't you pull on that stog, take out that picture and have a minute, we're gonna be over here doin' our thang."

Beca knew her face was flushed with frustration, it was the unfortunate thing about being Beca Mitchell, she blushed, but upon hearing that, she knew her face dropped completely, defensively, blank, "What picture? I don't have a picture."

"Mmmm-hmm." EZ just gave her a knowing eye as he pulled out a joint to share with his crew.

"Dude, we've talked about thi - a - not in here - we need to work - album - ugh, my god, fuck it." Her forehead planted on some of the free space of the desk.

EZTeez had started out as a small hip-hop artist found in the dumps of L.A. and honestly P.J. didn't think he would make a splash. L.A. was full of aspiring rappers and R&B artists; they were a dime a dozen. You found them on street corners, in all of the clubs, hell if you weren't careful they would move into your backyard like invading locusts or termites. They were slowly but steadily taking over the population of L.A. like Night of The Living Dead.

Yet somehow EZ had surprised them all by pulling enough traction to get placed with Beca and now, EZ was probably her biggest client...and he liked her. She wasn't sure he liked her enough that if she walked and created her own label one day soon he would break his contract to join her...but he liked her. So she tried her best to keep him happy, and keeping EZ happy was, well, not difficult per se as much as it was fucking time consuming and bad for her liver. He was the main reason she was out at the club almost nightly. He wanted 'a pretty little thang' who would take him out for a good time and 'show him the sights'. She was pretty sure that 'show him the sights' meant sex, which, yeah not happening, but somehow Beca being a lesbian, someone he could check out girls with and yet could not sleep with actually made him happier with their arrangement. It helped that Hunny was willing to step in every now and then and take care of um...some of the 'sights'.

She glanced at the men giggling and passing around the joint and decided, fuck it, if they were going to smoke then so was she. She pulled out the cigarette that had been balanced behind her ear and lit it, glaring across the room. P.J. wouldn't care. He was all about 'keeping the label fun and trendy'; she would just tell him one of EZ's crew was smoking if she needed to. It was unprofessional, but P.J. didn't really command a lot of professional behavior. As a matter of fact the more 'freewheelin'' she could be while turning out amazing music, the happier he was. Every report of the 'amazing time had with House Bex' the night before just made him happier and happier. Her label was not going to be like this, one big party where music happened to be made sometimes; no, Beca Mitchell...she had something to say and she was going to say it...the second she could get out from under 'Moment One Recordings'.

You just need a Grammy, Bec, you need a Grammy and then you can walk, open your own label and you won't just be yet another small time label lost in Tinseltown.

Over the live controller she saw the clock and grumbled. She was going to be late if they didn't finish this shit soon, and yet she knew the more they smoked the less likely they were to finish any time soon.

Stealthily she glanced at the men again and saw that they were thoroughly distracted discussing the possibilities of a 'ghetto Mambo No. 5' so she slipped open the bottom drawer of her desk and rummaged around for a minute. Hidden halfway down under some paperwork was the picture she swore she didn't have. Her fingers reached and softly brushed against the edge, feather light before she picked it up just an inch or so, simply to have it in her hand. Beca could say at a glance the very moment the shot was taken at the I.C.C.A.'s her freshman year, she could say exactly what she had been feeling and why. The photo was an up-close performance candid of herself standing between Aubrey and Chloe, their hands in the air as they all sang their hearts out. It was an important moment and it filled her with pride just to think about, they had kicked ass that night; but that wasn't why she pulled this picture out from time to time. The moment the photo was uncovered her eyes went right to the point, her best friend, eyes alight from the performance, hair wild as she moved.

The photo...it just made Beca feel better.

She started, feeling eyes on her and looked up. Growling, she slammed the desk drawer closed as EZ caught her eye, "I don't have a photo."

"Whateva, you say, lil' mama, whateva you say."

She opened her mouth to retort, but whatever was going to come out was cut off by a huge moan from the hallway as the door blew open and Hunny came flying in, her own spliff between her clamped teeth.

"Dude, you can't just walk around the lot with tha - ugh fuck it." Beca tried and gave up, all before she even finished her sentence. There was no getting between party-girl Hunny and her substances. That was a love affair that was a tale as old as time.

"There she is! Umm! Look at you, lookin' good!" EZ called, grinning, his hips gyrating as he sang, "'A little bit of Hunny in my life."

Hunny groaned in agitation but fell into his arms, "If you get Bex fired because you had to sing that song then I'm not going out clubbing with you anymore."

"Alright, alright, no need to make threats."

Hunny just gave him a lascivious wink and took a hit from between his fingers before puffing on her own and turning on Beca, "We're going to be late."

"Yeah, well, we gotta go through it at least one more time. EZ, I gotta go. Seriously."

"The question is, where you ladies going this fine evening and can I come?"

"It's uh, err, reunion of my college a cappella team."

He just stared at her, "For realz? That's a real thing?"

"Don't mess with her today, EZ," Hunny said, "she'll eat you alive."

"Eat me alive?"

Beca's eyes rolled, kicking her feet up so her chair spun her back to the board. She liked Hunny, they had good sex and fun with whatever their weird dating, not dating thing was, but she was also annoying sometimes.

"Alright, tell you what. I'll leave all that eatin' to the two of you and get back in there to do my thang."

"You do that, EZ, you do that."

It took another hour for the studio to empty and by then Beca was tired - and jittery. She still needed to go home and change, but though she had gathered her things to go, the large framed photo on the wall had distracted her. It was all of them, all of her Bellas, in their green robes and yellow stoles, cuddled together outside of the Bellas' house. It had been the first thing that she had put up in this second rate studio on the lot once it had officially become hers because it reminded her of the good things in life, of where she had been and of the people she loved. Usually she found it calming but tonight...the longer she stared at it the harder her heart was pounding in her chest. Why had she said yes to this? What the hell had possessed her? Oh, that's right. Hunny. Well fuck. It was true that Hunny had her - ways - of convincing Beca to do almost anything, especially given Beca's unexplainable thing for sexy showers but still. It had all come on too soon. How was it already mid-June? It was bullshit how time worked sometimes. It hadn't given her any warning. It was just suddenly here.

Beca stared at the picture, at all of their happy glowing faces and she realized that her stomach was in guilty knots. Why did she feel so guilty? For not being their leader anymore? They didn't need a leader anymore. For not, what, seeing them every day? Emily was the only one who lived close enough to visit and they hung out all of the time, she was Hunny's main drinking buddy. Or did she feel guilty for not being the person she had once been? Because she wasn't, Beca knew that. She wasn't the carefree hopeful yet jaded girl they had known a few years ago. She wasn't the girl who had cried to Fat Amy about not being good enough for her career choice. She just wasn't. She knew she could do it now. She was tired and she wanted out. She was tired of the games. She was tired of feeling like she was living in such a precarious spot. She was about to see these awesome women for the first time in a long while tonight and yet all she could think about was the fact that Synergy was dropping their first album that evening and she should be there. She was looking forward to seeing the Bellas...kind of...but Synergy needed her or rather...she needed to kiss Synergy's ass. Because she needed them…just in case she walked. Ugh. Her job sucked.

"Why do you look like you want to puke all over that photo?"

"Very fucking funny, Hun."

"Let's goooo. You're going to be happy when you see them. Watch."

"And if I'm not?"

Hunny nibbled suggestively on her ear, "I'll give you a cookie."

She watched Hunny start out the door with a scowl on her face and mumbled under her breath, "Better be a big freaking cookie."


It didn't help anything at all that the lead singer of Synergy called her on the way home mid artistic meltdown. Dave was like a child just learning how to ride a bike; he was good on his own, as long as you were very close by and though they had talked about her absence that evening, it was like he had never been informed.

Synergy had seemed, to P.J., to be the perfect addition to their eclectic label, easy to throw in between the death metal band Blackened Roses and the pop idol Kendra. However when their demo had only done, well, so-so, they had been handed off to Beca - for the most part. She had taken them happily because 90's throwback grunge was frankly not P.J.'s thing. She had worked her ass off and now their album was anticipated to make a huge splash, thank you very much.

Of course that probably meant that P.J. was going to sweep in any moment and scoop them back away from her. Which was awesome.

"You gotta be there, Bex," Dave had cried over the phone.

When did everyone start calling her Bex? She wasn't sure she liked it. Was Beca not sufficient? She blamed Hunny. "I'm sorry, Dave, I've got a thing. An important thing!"

"More important than our album?"

"What? Psssh, hell no!" Beca cried, layering on the producer charm; something Sammy had taught her from day one and truthfully had been one of her most valuable lessons. "Nothing is more important than that! History is being made tonight. Buuuuut, unfortunately I did agree to this thing before I agreed to your thing because your thing was supposed to be next week, remember? You wanted to move it up so that the party could be on a full moon. Don't worry, Josie is going to take excellent care of you and if I'm done early then I'll swing by with the Dom!" This seemed to please Dave, but it only made Beca more anxious. "Okay, I'll try and come by. Alright, Sonic Youth's got nothin' on you, Davie. Have fun! Play nicely with the other kids! You're amazing! Okay! Byyyye!" Beca hung up and frowned, she so didn't trust her assistant, Josie, to handle everything. Josie was good at paperwork but shit at people.

By the time they got back to her condo, Beca was a grumbling mess, chain smoking and throwing blankly even glares at Hunny whenever she came too close.

She showered quickly, threw on a tank, her favorite jeans, and a red plaid button up; then she paused in front of the mirror to paint her eyes into their usual raccoons. She had strayed from this look a bit as she had gone through college, dressing the part as the Bellas gained success and she began her first internship, but here in L.A. dressing too conservatively was the Georgia equivalent to a split tongue and tattooed lizard scales. She had adopted this look again and found that something about it seemed to comfort the label's clients, like she was just enough of a rebel to keep their tracks 'cool' or something but not so extreme that she scared them. She had also put her 'ear monstrosities' back in and gained stud spider bites. Nothing too big, yet it changed everything.

It was all a well thought out plan, each and every part of it.

"You're going to be late!" Hunny called from downstairs.

"Hey, uh, why don't you suck it, Hun? Just sayin'. Suck it? That could be cool."

"You're still gonna be late!"

"I should be going out with Synergy!" She yelled back and then jumped when Hunny appeared beside her holding out a whiskey bottle. Beca glared for a moment and then snatched it, downing a few shots worth and hissing at the burn.

"Better?"

"Better. Thanks."

"Let's go."


The nice thing about walking into - well, anywhere with Hunny was that she always pulled focus first. Beca wasn't famous. She had been shortlisted for a Grammy nomination – not a freaking Grammy – but a freaking nomination once but she hadn't actually made the cut. She had been bumped, as a matter of fact, by P.J. - who had lost to some new blonde indie singer. Still, that was her biggest claim to fame.

It was nice to slip into the background while mobs rushed at Hunny. Of course, more often than not there was at least one person in the crowd who knew who she was because she and Hunny were open in Hollywood, but that couldn't be avoided. She had already spent enough years not telling people that she was gay, she wasn't going to do it again.

This time however, disappearing behind Hunny wasn't going to work because inside the hotel convention hall doors, Beca was the 'famous' one.

She had recreated a very old team; she had made them champions...well not her alone, of course, but still.

She wished she had paused outside for another cigarette. Maybe she should go back and do that.

"You got this, yo, don't even worry about it."

Beca gave her half a smile but didn't move, that is until suddenly a much larger body than her own was shoving her through the doors, not giving her time to breathe or to ready herself. "AWK! Let go of me! Damn it, why are you so strong? You drink too much and eat too little to be this strong, dammm it lemmie gooooooo" she whined but it was pointless because she was inside.

The first thing that let her know she was at a Bellas event was the wall of perfume. What the hell was it with the uptight Bellas from the days before her team? They had always worn the worst floral perfume, just like half of them still wore their hair in those bouffant Hairspray-wannabe beehives. This was exactly why the Bellas had needed a change of pace so badly.

Hunny gave a little cough and Beca smirked, "Don't worry, you'll get used to it."

There were so many pastels around them; ladies holding little white clutches and martini glasses in their pearls and high heels that, of course, matched their outfit; cream with cream, baby pink with baby pink. Fuck, it was as if stepping through the door had suddenly shot them back fifty years in time. Beca had forgotten about that.

"Rebeca! You made it!"

"Err, Beca."

"Of course. Sorry. I'm Phoebe Hodgkiss, we're so glad to see you." Beca wondered who the 'we' was, perhaps Phoebe and her hair... "And this is..."

"This is my friend, Hunny Brooks."

"I see! Nice to meet you, dear." Phoebe stared for just a moment longer before recognition dawned. Beca could, as always, all but see Hunny swell at the attention, "Oh, you're on that show! The one with the teenagers trying to live together under one roof and, goodness, no one can get along, can they? Oh, what's it called?" Phoebe smiled and scooted closer as though about to give away a huge secret, "That show is a guilty pleasure of mine. I watch it whenever my husband has to work late."

Hunny laughed, "That's great! I'm so glad you like the show, though, um, none of us are teenagers. You must be yay old to ride Hollywood." Hunny gave her a small nod, measuring out her own height.

Beca coughed into her hand to cover her laugh.

"Oh, you know what I mean. When you get to be my age suddenly everyone seems so young. How do you all handle living in such close quarters like that?"

"Um, well," Hunny was looking at the woman as though she felt bad for her, "we don't actually live together. As a matter of fact, the show is far more scripted than you would think. We all get along great off camera...for the most part."

"Really?" Phoebe asked, eyes wide, scooting in even closer so that her stiff hair bumped Hunny's chin.

Beca rolled her eyes, playing nervously with her fingers. She felt like a sitting duck standing there just inside the door. "Okaaay, you two have fun. I'm gonna go and - yeah -" She left Hunny talking with Phoebe Hodgkiss and started toward the bar, glancing nervously around her.

A drink. She needed a drink before she -

A small grin crept onto her face the moment she saw them. Of course she should have assumed all of the people under fifty would be standing around the bar. It was exactly where she planned on planting herself, after all. They were all there, Fat Amy, Stacie, Cynthia Rose, Lilly, Jessica, Ashley, Flo and even Emily. All of her Bellas were huddled together, talking and laughing with their backs to her, as well as a number of other young girls who had to be the current or Emily's Bellas.

A flash of powerful relief start to course through her veins; why had she been nervous? Seeing them now she felt a bubble of affection rise up so strong that she wanted to run at them and throw her arms around them. Instead she planted her feet and, arms out wide, she called, "Where are my aca-bitches?"

The effect was instant. Amy made it to her first, picking her up and swinging her around, then she was in a scrum of Bellas all screaming her name and hugging, passing her back and forth like a rag doll. "Jesus Christ!"

She couldn't make out anything they were all saying, everyone talking over one another so she just smiled and smiled.

She had barely landed on her feet again when she heard, "Beca!"

She spun, excitement high in her throat and grinned at the tall blonde making her way through the crowd, "Aubrey!" Last time they had seen one another they had run into one another's arms, hugging and all but crying. They had become such good friends after, well, hating one another. But that had been just over two years ago when she had come to L.A. for a business meeting. Seeing her now, Beca realized - when was the last time she had heard from Aubrey? Beca also couldn't help, but to notice that this time she was the only one doing the running. Still, she went into Aubrey's arms willingly and noted that she received something that was more like half a hug.

Okaaaay…

"Hmmm," Aubrey said, giving her that look, that stupid fucking look she had seen all of freshman year, "You look tired, Beca." Ugh, she even said her name in that stupid slow way that Beca had hated.

She frowned, confused, "Great to see you too, Brey."

"Hells yeah it is!" Cynthia Rose grinned, throwing her arm over Beca's shoulder and leading her back to the bar. This grin Beca held was genuine as she was happily led back to the bar, but out of the corner of her eye she was looking. No! She wasn't looking. She was, err, just looking around. Perusing….taking in the scene, if you will, or - err -

Phoebe had said all her Bellas were coming, but she supposed that maybe she didn't fall into that category...even though she had been her captain for three of her seven years, maybe she could be called Alice's Bella as well – or even Aubrey's - but really, she had been with her so much longer. She had even been her number two, her co-captain.

Beca had picked up her phone to call Phoebe Hodgkiss a handful of times over the last few weeks, simply to ask for a specific list of names of people who had RSVPed; the whole 'all your Bellas' shit not cutting it. But she had lost her nerve every single time because she wasn't really sure she had wanted to know.

Beca took a seat at the bar, the Bellas lining up beside her all grinning and talking a mile a minute.

"Oh my god!" Stacie suddenly grabbed her arm, "Is that Hunny Brooks? Oh my god, what is Hunny Brooks doing at a Bellas reunion? She wasn't a Bella, was she? How did I never know she was a Bella?"

Beca opened her mouth to explain but before she could Hunny was squealing, "Oh my fucking god, it's so nice to meet you all! Fuck-a-duck, this is so great!"

All the Bellas just stared at her blankly, shocked.

"Uh guys, this is Hunny, she's uh, we're uh, she's with me."

"No shit!" Cynthia Rose bellowed, giving Beca a newly appraising eye, "I heard you came out 'nshit, but damn, girl!"

"I don't know who this person is, but you know who she looks like?" Flo asked and then there was a shuffling behind her and she went quiet, she and Ashley suddenly looking pointedly in opposite directions.

There was a beat of silence and in that moment insecurity clicked into place. Beca felt her producer charm bubble to the surface, an automatic reflex these days, "Alright, who needs some dranks!?" If she had learned anything since her first internship it was how to create a party and make someone feel important.

Catching up with the Bellas was better than Beca could have ever thought it would be. How had she forgotten how funny and cool these girls were? They really were the shit. How had she survived without them? That was just crazy.

She bought a round of drinks and a round of shots for everyone and then another a bit later while they layered story over story, calling jokes to the others and laughing, always laughing. That was the thing about college, wasn't it? It had always been so easy to laugh.

When she ordered a third round of shots, fuck it, Emily was here so she could call it a business expense, she took one specifically to Aubrey who was staying on the fringe of the group, sometimes mingling with them, other times mingling with other people in the room.

"Brey? For old time's sake?" Beca held it up, plus one for herself with her most charming smile, "I know we haven't talked much lately but-" She had to hold on to that smile tightly as Aubrey's arms crossed and she looked down at her, cutting her off completely.

"Not all of us do shots, Beca."

Beca just stared at her friend for a moment, understanding that they were - apparently - not okay, "Yeah, I guess that's an Alt girl thing, isn't it?" Aubrey was mad at her, for what, she had no idea. Okay...maybe she had some kind of idea. She felt her eyes roll as she sighed, tipped the first shot toward her former captain in a silent toast and then downed both as she headed back to her seat.

Whatever. She didn't really have time for that. In and out, Beca, in and out.

Maybe if she just ignored Aubrey for a while someone else would ply her full of alcohol and then they would talk. As a matter of fact, Beca chuckled once as she watched Hunny take a very fluffy looking drink from the bartender and start toward the statuesque blonde. Maybe it would be Hunny. Oh god, she would kill Hunny if she walked in on them in the bathroom later that night. As far as Beca knew Aubrey was straight, but so was spaghetti until you got it wet.

Uuuuhhhhh, stop thinking things like that!

"So Beca," Jessica turned to her with a toothy grin, "we were talking about it before and none of us knew. Where's Chloe? She's coming, right?"

"Yeeeah," Amy insisted, slamming another shot, "there's no way she would miss this."

Beca didn't like the way her heart jumped into her throat just then. She tried, unsuccessfully, to clear it away and signaled for another round for the group.

"Aye! These are coming faster than I can drink them!" She heard Flo whine behind her.

She supposed she should have assumed that it would come up eventually, but she had begun to hope that perhaps she really would get in, see her Bellas, make some memories and leave, all before Chloe arrived...or was even brought up.

"Awwwe," Ashley sighed before Beca could speak, "Chloe. I really miss her! What's been up with her? I swear I still miss her hugs whenever I'm sad."

Beca felt a flush beginning in her cheeks. Damn it. "I don't really know, guys." She took her shot and looked up, jumping when she saw all Bella eyes on her, "Uh, what?"

"What'd ya mean you don't really know? She's coming, right? When's she supposed to get here?"

"Why would you guys assume I would know what's up with Chloe? I mean," she let out a tense chuckle, "I'm not her keeper or anything."

"No, seriously Bec, when is she supposed to get here? These drinks are going to my head and I don't want to get too drunk before I see her," Stacie shook out her hair and gave her an eyelash fluttering grin.

"Guys! I don't know! Errr, I uh, I'm not exactly sure if she's coming. Phoebe said everyone was coming, but I don't know if she meant her too. I don't know. She and I don't - really talk anymore."

"Who, you and Phoebe?" Amy asked, licking salt from her hand.

"Chloe and - I."

The gasp that came from her friends made her jump yet again. Jesus, drama much?

"Whaaaa? I thought Bloe would be together forever. Did you have a fight? Just buy her some chocolates and it will be fine. That's what Bumper does for me when he forgets to put the kids down early so we can have a little daddy and mommy time." Amy said with a giggle, taking one of the shots in front of Flo and biting into a lime.

"What? No! Just, you know, life and stuff. So uh, yeah no, I dunno if she's coming or -"

"Oh, she's coming, Beca." Aubrey had apparently just joined their group again. Beca looked up to see her staring down at her, lips pursed around the long straw of the fruity concoction that Hunny had put in her hand, "She's just running late but I think that she's really excited to see you."

Their gazes held steady for a few beats, Aubrey giving her that stupid look of authoritative disapproval that Beca had always hated. A sudden desire to yell 'you don't have the pitch pipe anymore, Aubrey' rushed through her and Beca had to look away, wondering if she knew just how much that sentence had fucked with her head.

Was she really looking forward to seeing her? Oh shit.

It was like the air was starting to leak from her balloon. Before the reunion, Beca had almost convinced herself that she didn't care if she saw Chloe. It had taken some work but she had finally decided that it might be fine. No big deal. They would see one another, catch up for a few minutes and then spend the rest of the night with the other Bellas and move on.

She had to. If she hadn't decided that it was no big deal then there would have been no way she would be there; none at all.

Then she had arrived and she had seen the Bellas and the absence of her former best friend was such a giant, glaring elephant in the room that it was starting to make her panic. She had ignored it at first but it was becoming a highly persistent whine.

The longer the absence sat there, abscessing, the more uncomfortable Beca got and therefore the more she drank.

The awards were given out and Beca accepted hers, touched but stumbling a bit under Aubrey's fire-like glare. Beca's success with the Bellas had always been a sore spot for Aubrey, which she never understood because Beca was sure that the Bellas would never have won against Das Sound Machine without Aubrey's retreat, but whatever. Standing in front of the group like that, holding her little plaque for most influential Bella years 2012 - 2016, the elephant only grew. She could imagine her face, had nothing changed between them, glowing with pride. She could imagine the way she would have smiled, hands clasped in front of her as she bounced ever so slightly on the tips of her toes. This was just as much Chloe's win as hers.

'She's really looking forward to seeing you', the fuck? Yeah, no, this - this wasn't happening. She had to go. She couldn't just sit here and wait. She couldn't do this. She couldn't face this. No. So much no. She was outta here. She didn't really want to leave the Bellas, she wanted more time but she was not about this at all. If only they were going to be in town for a little longer, then she could see them...elsewhere...and relax.

She headed back to the bar, checking the time and searching for Hunny. It was getting late and her stress level was high. She ordered another shot, letting herself laugh with Amy despite the ball of tension in her gut. Where the hell was Hunny? Aubrey was over there so it wasn't - that.

She debated another shot but decided it wasn't a good idea. She was hitting the alcohol far harder than she normally would have done knowing she might end up at the club later for Synergy.

Synergy! That was it!

"Hey guys, have any of you heard of the band Synergy?"

Emily whipped around, guilt on her face. Apparently Beca's generous supply of drinks was doing its job because she groaned and came over to lean heavily into Beca's side, her head falling to her shoulder, "I'm so supposed to be at that party too."

"Oh yeah? P.J.'s gonna kick your hot little drunkie ass then."

"I knoooow." Emily groaned, "But Dave really wants to - you know, and I have a boyfriend. Plus, he has weird facial hair. It's gross. I really don't want to kiss something that looks like a vagina."

"Damn, Legacy, you've changed." Cynthia Rose sighed, shaking her head.

Emily seemed to realize what she had said and gave a little yelp, her hand closing over her mouth.

"Wait." Suddenly Stacie spun around on her stool, nearly toppling off. Clearly Beca had gotten all of the Bellas nice and drunk. "Did you say band? As in sexy musicians?"

"Did you miss the weird facial hair thing?" Emily asked and yelped again as Beca forcefully shoved her head back onto her shoulder.

Beca grinned at Stacie, knowing she had just won over the Bellas. She pulled out her phone and showed Stacie a picture of the band, "That one is single."

"Let's go!"

"Where are we going?"

"Finally! Where were you?"

"Smoking!" Hunny cried, alarmed by the bite in Beca's tone.

"Yeah, well now you get to do it again so I can go. We're gonna head over to the drop party."

"Sweet."

"Hey, Aubrey," Beca took a deep breath and headed over to the woman who was talking with Phoebe, "We're gonna uh, blow this joint and head to a party for a band with my label. You wanna come?" The look that Aubrey gave her would have cut her down at the neck if she weren't already so short. "I'm waiting for someone. As a matter of fact, you should be waiting for someone, Beca!"

Beca wasn't going to answer – she wasn't - she just turned to head back toward the Bellas but then, in proper Beca form she changed her mind at the last second, "You know, Aubs, whatever happened that has you so pissed off, yeah, it's none of your business. Soooo, maybe you should act like it." She gave her a little salute and she was gone, back to the Bellas. "I need to smoke and then let's get the fuck outta here."

'****'

Her legs were sore from the hours in the car and it felt so good to lean against the side and stretch for a minute, bending this way and that until her back gave a satisfying crack, popping back into alignment. Chloe was supposed to have had some time before the reunion to catch up with Aubrey, but that pile up on the 15 had really put a damper on her plans.

At least she had finally made it. She was here! The pile up was behind her and she was here.

And she was nervous.

Excited.

But nervous.

She paused just outside of the doors to run her hand over her stomach, smoothing any creases in her dress, and taking a deep breath. She let it out through her nose slowly and clicked on her best smile.

She didn't know what she had expected, but she felt a slight pang of disappointment when she saw just how thin the crowd was.

"Mrs. Cavanaugh!"

"Hi!" Chloe turned toward the woman she recognized as Phoebe Hodgkiss, "I'm sorry I'm late, there was an accident on the freeway!"

"Oh dear, nothing too serious, I hope. Well, we're glad you made it. Better late than never, I always say."

Chloe just smiled and nodded.

"There are still plenty of drinks at the bar and I think the refreshment table isn't completely picked over just yet. Why don't you grab yourself a bite and we'll chat later."

Chloe nodded again, scanning the crowd.

"Oh, they're all around here somewhere." Phoebe said, watching her gaze, "At least they were a minute ago."

Chloe gave her a slightly apologetic smile for her distraction and started around the room. She would check back in with her later.

Was she so late that she had missed everyone? Her stomach twisted; that would be terrible! Where would they all have gone? We're they staying here at the hotel? Maybe she should check the hotel bar or the restaurant.

She circled the room twice, her spirits dropping before:

"Chloe!"

She turned, a grin spreading only to fall when a handful of Bellas from her sophomore year came running up and threw their arms around her.

"How are you? Oh my god, it's so good to see you!"

"Out of my way!"

Chloe couldn't help the squeal that came out of her as she latched on to Aubrey, hugging her so tightly that she thought the blonde might pop. "Oh my god, Brey! Oh my god!" She let out a laugh and was genuinely surprised and embarrassed when her laugh hiccupped into a sob.

"What the hell, Chloe? What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" She forced out a high laugh, shaking her head against Aubrey's shoulder, holding tighter when Aubrey tried to pull away, "It's just, it's been a hard year and I'm so happy to see you."

"Awe, Chloe!" Aubrey hugged her tightly before pulling back and taking her hands, "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, totes!" She shook her head as if to say 'silly me' and dabbed under her eyes, "How are you?"

"Well, about the same as I was when we talked on the phone this morning! Did you stop at the hotel room and drop off your things?"

"No, they're still in the car. I didn't want to be any later."

"Okay. How's Nick?" Aubrey asked, wrapping her arm around Chloe's shoulder.

Chloe let out another small laugh and looked around again, "Where is everybody?"

"Ooh," Aubrey frowned glancing around, "I'm not sure. They were getting ready to go to some drop thing but I don't think they would have left yet since officially I was invited. Plus, I did tell them you were still coming."

"Oh! They're leaving?"

"So uh, Cynthia Rose and some blonde are making out in the bathroom like a couple of wombats in heat."

"Amy!" Chloe cried, about to throw her arms around her when, "Wait, what?"

Amy had been busy looking over her shoulder so she hadn't noticed the new addition, "GINGERRRR! I told them you wouldn't miss this!" And suddenly Chloe was wrapped in a bear hug that lifted her off the ground, making her squeal.

"Amy, what about Cynthia Rose?"

"Yeeeeah, playing tonsil hockey like a couple of horny jackrabbits. I dunno what Beca served her to drink but yeeeeah. Apparently Cynthia Rose has got cougar-fever."

"Wait, but I thought that Cynthia Rose was moving to Maine to get married. That's what she said at the retreat, right?" Aubrey asked, looking between them as if they should know.

Amy shrugged, doing a little awkward jig, "Don't ask me to explain the complexities of Sapphic love, I dunno! I've been strictly dickly all my life!"

Chloe flushed and uncomfortably laughed, "So where is everyone?"

"Well, uh, Cynthia Rose is in the bathroom…"

"Right."

"And everyone else is out back while Short Stack and Hunny smoke. You got here in the nick of time, we are hoppin' on the taxi train."

"Who's Hunny?" Chloe asked, turning to follow Amy.

"Yeah, about this tall, redhead, looks a little like you actually, ginger. She's on some TV show where bitches fight a lot. She's Short Stuff's date, I think. I dunno, she's been mackin' on this one all night so maybe not?" Aubrey looked like she had just stepped on a tack. "Oh, you know Beca is gay now, right? Tiny, angry lesbians all around. Yeeeaaah, lot of gay in this group."

"Oh." Chloe breathed, "Right. Yeah, I saw her coming out interview online. I think I know which woman you mean; I saw them at the Grammy's this year." That had been a weird moment since she had actually seen Beca with the woman before she had seen the interview.

"Right! Yeah! That one! Err, alright, I should probably go break up the lovebirds - or maybe horny birds is more like it, but, oh look, you can follow Stealthy."

Chloe turned just in time to see their beatboxing sister slipping out of the emergency exit.

"Aubrey, we have a few questions for you," Phoebe called from across the room.

"I'll catch up to you."

Chloe nodded and started toward the place where Lilly had disappeared, biting her lip ever so slightly. Her stomach was dancing; doing nervously excited jumps and splits as she pushed open the door, a smile already on her face.

It had been too long.

The small group was leaning together a few yards away passing a cigarette between them and chattering into the light summer breeze.

Her smile grew as she felt a spurt of something so Chloe that she almost laughed. She opened her mouth and cried, "Where are ma ladiez?"

"CHLOE!" They seemed to all scream her name at once, running at her and wrapping her in tight hugs.

"Oh my god, it's so good to see you guys! Look at you all! Oh my god!"

It was amazing what four years can do to a person.

"Are none of you aging? What the hell?"

"Don't be jelly of our youthful good looks!" Cynthia Rose laughed, pretending to fluff her hair.

"I am! I'm totally jelly!" She cried, hugging the two that just appeared from the door then making her way to the last Bella. "Look at you, Emily!" Even little Emily looked like a real bona fide adult now! "I listened to your album on the drive here!"

"O.M.G! Really? Yeah! That's still so weird to hear!"

Chloe happily threw her arms around the girl.

She hadn't even registered that there were more people standing behind the group of Bellas, not until she happened to glance over Emily's shoulder and found she was looking straight into those smoky blue eyes. The wind knocked from her lungs in a swoosh at the sudden surprise of - Beca. There she was! Right there, after two years! Within reaching distance!

Within smacking distance!

Within hugging distance!

She blinked quickly trying to process as her heart leapt with excitement and her stomach dropped out all at once.

Beca was five feet back, a cigarette dangling from her lips. She was standing, slightly slouched to the side with her feet planted as though she had made no effort to come and meet Chloe as the others had. Chloe's skin turned to goose bumps as she noticed- her face...it showed - absolutely nothing - no recognition at all. It was like they were total strangers. Chloe had never seen that before, even the day they met she had shown more interest.

Chloe released Emily and there was nowhere else to go, there was nowhere else she wanted to go then but to her best friend. As a matter of fact she had to force herself to remain calm. What she wanted to do was launch herself at her, wrap her in a tight hug and not come up for air for a week. But, in that moment she watched Beca pull the cigarette from her lips and let out a nonchalant plume of smoke, and she was so isolated that Chloe hesitated.

Uncertainty washed over her as she glanced at the woman next to Beca. She was...pretty; definitely the same woman she had seen her with before. She at least looked excited but...the uncertainty only grew as Beca's blank face never changed. There was nothing else to do, though. So she clicked on a smile and started forward.

'****'

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

This wasn't panic, no; this was fight or fucking flight.

She hadn't made it. Of course, she hadn't. It didn't matter when she had decided she didn't want to - couldn't handle - seeing Chloe, whenever she had decided that would have of course been exactly when Chloe would have shown up. She could have decided next week and Chloe wouldn't have shown up until then, or she could have decided as she was getting into her car and Chloe would have appeared like magic beside her.

NOPE, NOPE, NOPE, NOPE, her mind was screaming as she watched the woman begin to loosen her grip on Emily, the last Bella...besides her. She knew she was next. She took the second that Chloe's eyes left hers to pull in a huge fast puff of her cigarette and tried not to turn purple as the smoke burned her throat.

God damn it! She turned and let out a small hacking cloud, annoyed and embarrassed that her I-swear-I'm-cool blank cover had been broken. But Chloe was giving Emily a post hug smile and didn't seem to notice.

Beca watched those freakishly gorgeous blue eyes flash from Emily to Ashley as she started to move around them and she felt one of her knees weaken, threatening to buckle.

It was Chloe.

Damn it, it was Chloe!

Removing her from her life had been like surgically removing her arm without anesthesia and here she was, right in front of her.

Those two pictures she had kept handy didn't do her justice. How had she forgotten that pictures couldn't do her justice? She was, god, she was so beautiful. It wasn't fair. It made her dizzy. Or maybe it was just the fact that Chloe had taken a step toward her that was making her head spin.

She was coming.

Ugh, and she was smiling that 'just for Beca' smile that she had always loved, that had made her feel stupid special like if she tried jumping off a building to fly, she would simply soar through the trees because Chlo had willed it.

She felt like an animal in a snare. There was nowhere to go. There was nowhere to go, oh god stop smiling at me like that, I'm stuck, it's been too long for this, holy crap, I can't breathe.

And then Chloe was in front of her, fingers laced before her as she tentatively smiled, leaning a little trying to recapture Beca's gaze as one of her eyes dipped into a wink, "Hi Bec. Remember me?"

Smile, you're supposed to smile.

Beca clicked on a small, half-assed smile and then she's there, all around her. Curly red hair was in her face, strong but soft arms wrapped around her and for just a moment she heard the tiniest of happy little giggles. It was all so familiar, so comforting that Beca couldn't stand it. The arms gave a tighter squeeze and she felt her face accidentally shoved into Chloe's neck. She still smelled the same, even after all of these years. She still smelled the same so Beca let out an awkward laugh and pulled away, far too quickly for Chloe, she knew it. Chloe was a strong believer in long hugs.

"Hi! You must be Chloe! It's so great to finally meet you!" Hunny cried and the women hugged as though they were old friends.

Which was...really annoying.

And then...it was just quiet.

Down the street a man yelled for a taxi, a few blocks away a dog barked and suddenly there was a car horn blast from nearby; and each and every Bella heard it all because the tension, the awkward silent tension, just went through the roof as the tiny brunette and the redhead stood there staring at one another.

"They had a fight." Amy leaned over and loudly whispered to Stacie.

"Amy! No we – uuuugh, whatever!" Beca stomped out her cigarette and shoved her hand through her hair, "Are we going or what?"

"Where are you guys going? I just got here; can we please all at least have a drink?" Beca could hear the small hurt in Chloe's voice and felt herself react primally for just a second, ready to hurt the thing that was making Chloe hurt, even if it was herself. But she couldn't seem to look up at her so she just let Stacie explain about the band and the party.

"Oh yeah, you can totally come too, Chloe, if you want" she told the wall.

Good job, Bec, total nonchalance. Crushed it. You got this.

She was so proud of herself that she even found the courage to glance sideways out of the corner of her eye at Chloe. It was a bad plan, however, and her stomach dropped away instantly. She could see that face; that quick little eye dart as if she couldn't believe whatever it was she had just heard, the ever so slight part of her lips, the way her head pulled back just a bit. It's the face that only happened when Chloe had been truly and unexpectedly hurt.

Shit.

'****'

She knew she needed to close her mouth and unfold her arms which had automatically crossed before her to shield from the burn, but the comment - the tone that said you're not really welcome - it had come as such a surprise that it had stunned Chloe into simply watching Beca step around her and head back inside.

She had expected awkward or even weird but that...

She cleared her throat.

Okay.

Yes, that had hurt.

But…

Whatever it was that had made Beca mad enough to end their friendship two years ago, she was clearly still mad about. Chloe could handle mad Beca. It used to be a specialty of hers. She had this.

"Come on, Chlo!" Stacie called, giving her a large smile.

Okay. She could do this. She just had to suck it up. No big deal. They would get through this.

She swallowed hard and followed the rest of the girls inside.