Lost and Found

Chapter Four: Blood is thicker than Water

Disclaimer: I only own Canan everything else belongs to JK Rowling.

Several weeks had passed since the start of the term and Canan, had by all appearances, adjusted quite well. Severus knew though, that appearances could be deceiving, and never to take a Slytherin at face value. Sometimes he thought a chameleon would have been a better symbol than a snake, but it was only a passing thought. Terrance Higgs gave regular updates on Canan, as he was a special case being here so young, and Terrance had been instructed by both him and Dumbledore to pay close attention to him. He reported that he was doing well in all his classes and his marks backed up the fifth year's statement. The older first years protected their own in joint classes, including Canan, and the older ones looked after him in the halls, as the Gryffindors could be rather intrusive about his situation. An early trip to Hogwarts only happened around every 100 years, after all. But there was one thing about Canan that Terrance had found exceptionally odd. He had reported to Severus that Canan was very secretive when changing and using the bathroom and never wore anything that exposed his arms or legs. He always took rather long showers and came out of the bathroom fully dressed. Severus suspected that Canan was still engaging in self destructive behavior which he had attempted to address during the summer, but due to ancient school policy, unless he had proof there was nothing he could do, and Dumbledore, though well meaning, said that the behavior would stop now that he had been removed from the abuse. He had already put in a request for the policy to be revised.

Any way, Snape knew better than to assume Canan would just stop and usually kept a close eye on him in potions, a class where the use of knives and flames were regularly available to him. But today, being mid October, the 16th to be precise, his mind was elsewhere. The 16th of October was the day he was going to tell James of his pregnancy. That meant it was 10 years ago to date that this mess with the pig and his precious son had began. Sure he had known of his child prior to that encounter, but it was the 10 year anniversary of his ended involvement with James that somehow made the particular date significant. The first years had been brewing a simple potion Snape thought they would have been able to handle when a hissing announced that a potion had gone awry and he quickly moved from his desk to the source of the sound. To his surprise it was Canan's potion. He had just enough time to tell everyone, "Clear away and get down!"

With that he yanked the 9 year old from his desk while extinguishing the burner with his wand and cast a spell to contain the wreckage in a small perimeter. He hadn't lost a student yet and he had no plans to. It took only nanoseconds, but the cauldron exploded violently, contained within the field and everyone unharmed, though they were shaken. "You all are dismissed. Mr. MacSwan stay behind." Snape's voice booms, echoing off the halls of the class room. As the students filed out, Severus was going through what could have happened in his head. None of the ingredients in this potion interacted with the other ingredients this way at any point in the brewing process, even when not added in the correct order or stirred improperly. Nor would it react this way with improper quantities, and again this would be regardless of order. After all, the ingredients in this potion were very stable, as he was teaching first years. It would be foolish to have them working with volatile potions ingredients. He even went as far as to set out the ingredients on a table from the front so that someone didn't accidentally retrieve the wrong ingredient from his store rooms, which could lead to disaster. The only thing he could surmise was that it was a bodily fluid that had accidentally found its way into the potion as it was the only ingredient that could be retrieved without a trip to the store rooms.

"Take a seat Mr. MacSwan, while I deduce the extra ingredient in your potion." Severus orders, muttering a cleaning spell as an after thought as he went over the list of bodily fluids that interacted with each ingredient, and stopped when he came to the eel eyes. There was one very specific substance that caused explosive reactions with eel eye, especially when the potion was brewed in salt water, as this one was. Blood. But again, this was more specific than just pricking your finger on a rose thorn blood. This interaction called for the blood of a child willingly spilled, and with that, Severus had the proof he needed to intervene in Canan's self destructive behavior.

"Ahh. So that's what happened. There's only one combination that would cause your potion to react the way it did." He says, using a tone more gentle than he usually used. "Canan, I think that it would be best if we had this talk in the hospital ward. I promise your not in trouble though. So it would be for the best if you came willingly. As your head of house, I'm here for you to talk to if you need anything, and I can see that you do. I will not judge you, nor will I discuss anything we speak of with other members of staff. It is important though, that we have your arms looked at. I've had suspicions I haven't been able to act on until now, but as unwise as your choice is, using a knife that has been used to prepare potion ingredients was even less wise." He explains calmly.

Canan, though terrified at the fact he had been caught in the act, nods his head in willingness to receive medical treatment, and Severus guides him to the fireplace where he floos to the infirmary. "Madam Pomphry I have a student in need of a private room for treatment. It would be wise if we discussed the nature of the injury inside." He informs the nurse, and she nods and points them to a room off to the left. "All right we'll go in here." She says and the three file through the door. "All right, what seems to have happened?" She asks and Canan looks up at Severus, not sure how to explain the problem. "Canan MacSwan injured himself intentionally with a potions knife. I have not seen the injury, but it was enough for a sufficient amount of blood to interact with the salt water and eel eyes in a cough potion." He says professionally, trying to maintain the child's dignity as much as he could in this situation.

"All right. Please remove anything covering the injury Canan." She says. The child removes his robe and sweater, then rolls up the bloodied sleeve of his left arm. As the wound was self inflicted, it wasn't possible to heal it fully with magic when a knife used for magical applications was used. This was because of the users' intent interacting with the magic in the blade, but Poppy spelled it clean and stopped the bleeding. Closing the flesh though, had to be done the muggle way. With a needle and thread. Once it was done and properly bandaged, Severus says, "It's time for us to talk and I think it would be best if Poppy stays with us for this conversation. I get the feeling that perhaps you may need some more assistance from her due to your motivation for this behavior and I wonder if there are any untreated injuries that haven't healed properly which may be corrected. Your parents attitudes toward you made you want to engage in this behavior, am I correct?" Asks Severus. Canan nods his head.

"Can you tell me why that is?" He asks. "They hurt me and didn't want me. Nobody ever did." He explains. "What do you mean by that?" Asks Severus as Poppy fills out the treatment chart in his file and notices a curious date of birth. "I mean neither set wanted me." He elaborated, causing Severus to raise an eyebrow. "You were adopted? I can see how dealing with the rejection of two sets of parents would cause you to feel so unloved, but your house is your family now Canan, and we won't reject you or allow harm to come to you. I know that can't replace your parents though." Snape says, trying to assure him. "The sorting hat said that my "material line" Was Slytherin. I guess it must run in the family."

Severus cocks his head at this. "The sorting hat told you your parents are magic?" He asks, and Poppy's eyes widen in surprise. "You look as though your shocked professor." Canan points out. "Canan, that's because no witch or wizard would willingly leave their child with a muggle who didn't already know of our existence because it would endanger our privacy and the child." Severus says cautiously, unsure what circumstances would have placed the child in muggle care. But seeing the date on Canan's birth certificate, the wheels in Poppy's head were turning. Especially looking between the two. "Did the hat tell you what house your father was in dear?" She asks, hardly daring to hope. She was one of the few people who knew, as both families medical history helped her to know what to watch for during Severus' pregnancy. "It said that my father was from a line of Gryffindors. Why?" He asks. "It may be nothing." She says and looks at the paperwork on his adoption. After a moment she seemed to have found what she was looking for.

"Oh my. Severus, may I talk to you outside dear?" She asks him. Severus nods stiffly, bad memories reaching the surface when he explained the information he had on his parentage. "Severus I was just looking over the paperwork, and this child was taken to a church by a muggle homeless man on the 28th of May in 1978, and the doctor who examined him said he was no more than a day old. His birthday is the 27th of May." She says, and the normally stoic professor swallows a lump in his throat. "Poppy that's an amazing coincidence but Canan is from Bettyhill." She nods as though she were expecting that. "Here's the rub. The church was in Wick. His medical records were all in Wick until he turned 5." Severus looks at the door and tries to still his beating heart and then turns to Poppy. "I think all that's left is casting a spell for confirmation, but I think we should contact Albus and the ministry. I'll cast the spell once Albus arrives and then we can contact the ministry." She says.

"Poppy, what do I even say to him? I let this happen if your conjecture is correct." He says, his composure beginning to slip. "Don't you dare say it was your fault young man. You tell him the truth. Tell him how much you loved him and how you still do. Tell him that the circumstances surrounding his disappearance were beyond your control, and you searched for him until the day you found what was supposed to have been confirmation of his passing. And that you never in a million years wanted to see him in pain." She says and sends a patronus to Albus. The headmaster floos in seconds later. "Albus I... Perhaps it would be best if we explained this with Canan." She says.

The three walk back into the room to find a very confused 9 year old and all three of them take a seat, where Poppy casts the charm "Exponere vincula tua." A charm that when translated meant, 'expose thy ties.' With this, a quill and parchment record his family tree, and Severus' heart skips a beat as Albus' eyes twinkle. When it's finished, the potions master begins an explanation. "Canan, due to the information the sorting hat gave you we were able to determine your parentage." Severus begins, taking a deep breath to steady himself. "10 years ago a 7th year student became pregnant. A decade ago, things such as the possibility of a wizard conceiving a child weren't taught in our curriculum of introduction to the wizarding world. It's because of this that the students who were born and raised in the muggle world are taught this now. To prevent an incident such as the one I'm about to describe to you from happening again. Canan, both your parents were wizards. And when your maternal father discovered he was pregnant, he was very confused at first but he loved you more than anyone in his life he had met before or after you were born. Your paternal father on the other hand loathed your other father, and wanted nothing to do with him. It's because of him you disappeared shortly after your birth. Your other father searched for you for years until some time after the death of your other father, who left what seemed to be confirmation of your passing. He never got over the loss, but he always thought of you. He always would have given anything to have you back and safe." He says, swallowing a lump and taking a deep breath.

"Sir, what happened to my "maternal" father?" Asks Canan, his brow furrowing with worry, assuming some sort of tragedy had occurred. Severus puts a hand on the side of Canan's head, running his fingers through his hair. "Canan, your father closed himself off from the world, but became a professor at this school. He never stopped thinking of you. Then one day, he was sent to look into a muggle home where a child was performing dangerous acts of accidental magic. He didn't know at the time that this child would be in the house he was the head of, and he certainly didn't know he was your father." He explains, looking at the child anxiously. He wasn't sure how Canan would react to this information. He takes a deep breath before continuing. "Canan if I could change the past, I would do it no matter what it may cost me just so you wouldn't have had to have lived the life you've lived until now. I had no greater desire than to have you safe in my arms. And finding you alive has been so bittersweet I'm not even sure how I should react. On one hand I'm over joyed to have you back. Yet on the other I'm so angry at myself I couldn't protect you the way I should have. And lastly, I'm terrified you won't want anything to do with me because I didn't save you sooner." As he finished he ran a thumb along Canan's cheek, looking deep into those hazel eyes as he felt his own starting to water.

Canan wasn't sure how to react to this, and was overwhelmed by the news that he had one parent who was not only alive, but wanted him. He was devastated by the fact that he had been taken away from him and forced to live such a dismal life to this point when there was someone who actually wanted him. He felt as though he had been robbed of his happiness and his life up till now all because his paternal father was selfish. "Who's my other father?" He asks, rage pouring off his small frame. Severus takes a deep breath. "Canan, the situation with your other father is a very delicate one. And I more than anyone, save for maybe you now that your aware of his hand in the course your life has taken thus far, hate the man. But for your safety I don't think that it's pertinent information for you to know." Severus attempts to explain. The child goes on to question him. "Why?" He had an indignant look on his face and a demanding tone. "Because though your father was a wicked man, exposing that would cause upheaval. Your one of the few it seems, who actually pay attention in history of magic. As such, you must be aware of the wizarding war that occurred in the very recent past. Your father died a hero, though I suspect his motives for the actions which lead to his death were far from honorable. The fact remains that there are those out there who still support the ideals of the losing side, and things are still very tense. There are those who chose not to take a side and there are also those who have precarious loyalty. As such, exposing a hero who played a pivotal role for the side of light as one who would commit, or at least attempt to, a crime as heinous as infanticide would not do well to preserve the delicate peace we've achieved and undo years of work to rebuild. I trust that you would keep the information of your free will, but there are ways someone can look into your mind or force you into telling the truth if you don't want to. And those are the circumstances I worry about."

Canan takes in the information, allowing some time to process it. Severus had well founded reasons for keeping the identity of his father a secret. But his mind was still reeling from all this information. Professor Snape was his father? Or mother? What did he even call him? Canan was so confused. He gave birth to him so he was his mother. But at the same time he was a man so he was his father. But the boy wasn't sure that he could call him any sort of parental name just yet. The only parental figures in his life had done nothing but hurt him, so he had a negative feeling toward parental authority to begin with, and he couldn't very well just throw his past out the window and flounce through a field of daisies into Severus's arms and cry his past away, suddenly be fine, and walk happily into the sunset with his long lost father like in a made up story. That kind of stuff only happened in movies and he wasn't Sarah Crew from A Little Princess. Even though he was a wizard, he understood the difference between fantasy and reality. And he knew that everything wouldn't magically be perfect now that he found out the truth of his parentage.

"Well," Dumbledore begins, deciding that a change in subject was needed and that things had to be taken care of from the legal end, "I've made contact with the Ministry, as Canan is still their ward and it wouldn't do for the two of you to be separated again should they decide to find a guardian for him outside of Hogwarts. If he gets taken away again the two of you may not be able to be reunited for another 9 years when Canan is of age. Even if your not comfortable with a parent child relationship yet Canan, I don't think you want to lose Severus am I right?" He asks. Canan nods his head and says, "Knowing Professor Snape is my, um, parent, doesn't change everything right away, but I don't want to lose him either. It may take me time to get used to this." He says, fidgeting slightly. "Canan, the news you received today changes everything you've ever been told and nobody expects you to accept it all at once. It will take time to adjust. But if you give me the chance nothing would make me happier than that." Says Snape in a reassuring tone. "All right. Then what needs to happen?" The child asks as there's a soft knocking on the door.

"I think Lucius can explain that my boy." Says Dumbledore with a twinkle in his eye. "Come in Lucius." And with that the blonde walks through the door, one hand on his cane and the other holding a file. "Well what happens next is we file the paperwork to nullify the MacSwan's adoption with the muggle court system. This shouldn't be of any difficulty since they no longer have custody and the courts would find it in your best interest based on the fact that your adoptive parents actions, while in their custody, were detrimental to your welfare. In other words because their actions hurt you rather than helped. The circumstances of your adoption were unusual because of the way you were found. The courts believed that your case was one of a child being abandoned by the mother which is by default considered giving consent, which means permission for the adoption. But this wasn't the case because you were taken from Severus and because of this the adoption would have to be reversed by law because Severus didn't actually give permission. What happens when the adoption is reversed is your birth certificate will be changed to list the name of the parent who will raise and make all legal decisions with regard to your well being. This will also change your name if you wish it to." The blonde explains to the child in terms he could understand. "Okay. Change it. I don't want to have their name." He says, causing the corner of Severus' lips to turn up into a smile. "Okay. The only extra step is this Severus." He says, pulling out a piece of parchment from the stack in the file along with a self inking quill. It was the only piece of paperwork that didn't fill out automatically due to magic. "This is the birth certificate that was to be filed with the ministry 9 years ago. Canan's original birth certificate. Print Canan's full name at the top and sign your name in the space for the maternal parent. Dumbledore and I will sign as witnesses, and it appears Madam Pomphry already signed off on the birth 9 years ago. When the paperwork in the muggle court system gets processed, this will automatically be filed and you'll receive an owl telling you that everything is official.

Severus leans over and whispers something to his son, who whispers back before Severus takes the quill and fills out the paperwork with a rare smile. When Albus and Lucius see the name at the top they can't help but smile too. Printed at the top were two very different names than he had been given by the MacSwans. The meaning of the name said a lot of the parents, and Canan's original name had religious significance to them. It was misspelled though, and took on an entirely different meaning. Because of this, the two decided his first name wouldn't change. In Turkish, Canan meant beloved. His middle name was loathsome to Severus though. It was a name of English origin that meant pain. Severus abhorred the idea of any more pain shaping his identity, and it was now evident that their whispering was about a new middle name. Printed next to Canan was the name Drazin. A Croatian name that meant treasured. A name Severus had been considering giving him all those years ago. And the last difference in his name was the surname. The one he now shared with Severus. Today, Canan started on the path of the person he was always meant to be. Canan Drazin Snape.

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