Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Academy, so usual disclaimers.
Chapter 1
Rose POV
I woke feeling groggy. All I wanted is it go back to sleep, but I knew it would be no use. It has been a week since the Strigoi attack I haven't been sleeping well. I probably get five or six hours sleep a night maybe less. The school has tried to go back its regular routine but it's difficult for everyone. There are reminders everywhere: charred grass where Christian lit Strigoi, boarded windows and workers trying to fix the damage. Worst of all are the people who are no longer with us. Some were killed and their bodies were left for proper burial and some were taken and will be forever damned. It is hard seeing the empty desks where our friend's once sat and the new faces of Guardians and teachers who are replacing those who we will never see again. It is even harder feeling the guilt for being glad that we or one we love are still here when others are not.
I changed into my track pants and sports top and headed off to the gym. For once I arrived early, I opened the door and the gym was dark. There was no note on the door this morning so I thought that maybe this would be the day that things start going back to normal. I looked around and I couldn't see Dimitri anywhere. This hasn't been the first time he has been late or even not shown up for training this week.
Dimitri had been acting distant and distracted lately but nothing I did helped. First I tried to hug him and sooth him as any girl would for the man she loved but he shrugged out of my embrace and chastised me for being indiscreet. I tried to talk to him but after what he said I haven't tried to speak with him again recently. His words did hurt me but I decided that it was his stress talking and that he would apologise as soon as he had time to destress and realize what he said. I turned on the gym lights and looked at the clock, he was five minutes late. I sat in the middle of the floor like he normally does and waited. Ten minutes later and he still hadn't turned up, so I just started warming up it looked like I was going to be training myself, again. He hadn't turned up, by the end of the session, so I just walked off toward my dorm so I could shower and get ready for class.
I would feel Lissa through the bond, she wanted me to hurry up. I was feeling a little grumpy so I carried on as normal and walked towards the cafeteria. Lissa sitting there with Christian, Adrian and Eddie. She looked happy, understatement, ecstatic would the word. I could feel though the bond that though she was feeling a bit uplifted, but most of her mood was forced. She was trying to find a reason to move on from the melancholy mood we all have been in.
"Rose, what in earth took you so long to get down here?" she asked.
"Nothing Liss, I was just getting changed from gym practice," I replied coolly so no one would ask, but I guess I gave something away.
"Little Dhampir?" Adrian asked, I looked at him and shook my head.
"Anyway what's going on Liss?" I changed the subject I saw Adrian frown from the corner of my eye.
"We are going shopping, in two days. So we can get things for a party that's coming up," she replied quickly, she didn't even ponder the subject change. I smiled mentally, knowing it was easy to sidetrack her.
"Oh, okay." I said as I walked over to get something to eat. As I lined up, I saw someone walking towards me.
"Rose, can I talk with you please?" Guardian Petrov said to me.
"Yeah okay. Just let me get something to eat and then we can talk," I replied.
I always liked Alberta; she was like a mother to me. I got some buttered toast and eat it while we walked towards the other side of the cafeteria. I glanced at Lissa, who looking at me curiously. A frown crinkled her brow.
"Are you in trouble Rose?" she asked through the bond. I shook my head, and she nodded and smiled but I could feel she wasn't quite sure what to make of Alberta talking to me. I smiled and shook head. I turned back to Alberta but she was standing there looking at me pensively.
"So Guardian Petrov, what do you want to talk about?" I asked getting bored of the silence. She snapped out of her trance and squared her shoulders.
"Um, Rose your sessions with Dimitri have been cancelled." She told me.
"What? Why? How long for?" I asked.
"I err don't know if I want to be the one to tell you this-" She started.
"Just spit it out for Christ sake," I interrupted her.
"He ... left," she whispered.
"He what?" I asked. I felt my world tumbling apart.
"He left to become Tasha's guardian." She replied. I didn't know what to say. He left me, after he told me he loved me. The cabin flash back came back to me.
The night of the Strigoi attack
I rested my head on Dimitri's bare chest, taking comfort in his warmth. He kissed my forehead and ran his fingers through my hair and down my back, caressing my skin in the most delicious way.
"I love you, Roza." He kissed me again. "I'll always be here for you. I'm not going to let anything happen to you." I've never felt so safe, loved and wanted in my entire life.
My own mother may love me on some level though I can't say I have ever felt it, she certainly never made me feel like she had ever wanted me. I know Lissa loves me like a sister but it is me who makes her feel safe. My friends and teachers all care for me and I care for them. Dimitri is… he is the part of me I didn't even know I was missing and I believe in my heart that he feels the same.
I snuggled closer to him trying to forget that as soon as we leave this cabin we will have to go back to our duty filled lives where a relationship like ours is completely forbidden I don't know how I will survive once we leave.
"I wish we weren't Dhampir. I don't want to leave here. I want to stay here with you in this moment forever. I know it supposed to be wrong to feel this way but…"
"Shh, Roza," he held me tighter. "I promise you that we will find a way. You are my other half I and will never give you up."
End of flashback
I didn't need to look at Alberta to know she was worried about me, and how I would take the news.
"Rose?" I didn't reply. "Rose, are you okay?" she asked, I shook my head.
I always wondered if Alberta knew about our relationship. It took everything in me not to scream out. Instead I walked away, I could hear Lissa shouting at me through the bond, but I just blocked her out. I ended up running, I ran through the quad at top speed. A few people stared as I ran back to my dorm building instead of walking in the direction I came from. My intention was to go to my room but when I got to the stairs, I took them two at time, running up passed my floor. At the end of the staircase I came to a grey door marked roof. I felt as if the world was crashing down around me as I choked on the debris. I needed fresh air. The door was locked so I kicked it open, and ran outside into the cold night. There was a five gallon bucket filled with sand that I could only assume was meant to prop the door open. I closed the door and moved the bucket in front of it to hold it closed. I moved to go and sit, in front of one the vents to stay warm.
I replayed everything since the first session, Dimitri had missed.
Flashback
I wondering around the gym waiting for Dimitri to turn up, he was twenty minutes late, and I was starting to worry. I walked out of the gym, after finally deciding to look for him. I walked out into the night, towards the guardian dorm.
Alberta was there, guarding the reception area. She looked up when she heard the door open.
"Rose what are you doing here? You should be in training with Guardian Belikov," she asked her guardian mask slipped and she smirked slightly when she called him Guardian Belikov. She knew I never called him that.
"Yeah I know I'm meant to be but he didn't show up. See he's thirty minutes late and I was going to see what was keeping him so long." I replied.
"I know that he has gone through a great ordeal but I am not happy to see him shirk his responsibilities. I will talk with him about it later but for now you may check his room. It's #125 by the way." She said smiling. I already knew his room number from when I had gone to see Dimitri after Victor had kidnapped Lissa.
"Thanks Guardian Petrov," I called back as walked up the stairs. When I got to his room I paused a moment before knocking. Yesterday had been the first time I had seen him since he left my hospital room and he had shrugged off my embrace and told me not to touch him like that where anyone could see. The rest of training he had me running and weight lifting, no sparring. When our hour was up he just said I was done and he left the gym. Judging by his mood lately I wasn't sure how he was going to receive me. I heard shuffling around and then footsteps. Dimitri opened the door, and looked at me impassively.
"Rose, what are you doing here?" he said coolly.
"I, err, wanted to know why you're late for practice," I teased, trying to lighten his mood but it seemed to make him angry instead.
"Rosemarie, I'm sorry if I missed our session, but I have other things on my mind," he replied sarcastically, and then growled. I flinched back, at his behaviour. I know that it must have really affected him to have come so close to death or the un-death that might have happened to him if I hadn't gotten to him in time.
"Dimitri, talk to me. I'll listen." I said while looking into his eyes.
"Rose, just leave." He said bluntly. I stammered back.
"What?" I asked dumbfounded.
"Just go away." He said again in the same tone.
"Dimitri what has gotten into you? We are together now and we are supposed to be there for each other. If something is bothering you then let's talk it out." I shouted at him as I reached for his hands.
"Nothing, just leave me alone, it's nothing a child would understand," he replied harshly and jerked his hands even further from mine. I looked at him, his pain filled eyes held no love. I ran from the dorm with tears running down my face.
The next few days I found a note on the gym door telling me to start without him. The first day he showed up in time to tell me that my session was done and after that he came in over half an hour late, told me to lift weights and spar against one of the dummies. He didn't talk to me or touch me in any way.
If I was honest with myself it hurt me very much that he was being so distant. I really needed him to hold me and reassure me that things would get better. I needed him and I felt like he didn't want or need me.
End of flashback.
By the time I stopped the replaying the memories, tears were running down my face again, and I was shivering form the cold. I knew I needed to go indoors but I couldn't face Lissa, in fact I couldn't face anyone. I closed my eyes, and shut off just thinking about Dimitri. Eventually I fell asleep.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
So there is chapter 1 re-done. Can you spot the extras?
Like it the new improved chapter 1 ?
Let me know
Vickie-Louise.
