Chapter Five
Beca didn't pull away at first. This was exactly what she had been hoping for. The feelings she had been terrified to share for so long that she was terrified Chloe would hate her for were suddenly all coming true. Beca pulled Chloe closer, and within a few seconds Chloe had pulled Beca on top of her. Chloe wrapped her arms around Beca and started giggling.
"What's so funny?" Beca asked.
"I take it you feel the same way?" Chloe asked.
"I have for a while but I've been-"
"Scared?" Chloe finished. Beca nodded.
"So, I have a question then." Chloe said.
"What?" Beca asked. Chloe kissed Beca's lips then worked her way down to her neck.
"Will you," Chloe kissed her. "Beca Mitchell," Another kiss. "Be my girlfriend?"
"Are you…are you serious?" Beca asked, dumbfounded. "After I fucked up the competition and…I thought you were mad at me. What will Aubrey think?"
"This isn't Aubrey's relationship." Chloe said coolly, giving her another kiss. "And you are successfully avoiding my question."
"Nothing would make me happier." Beca smiled and pulled Chloe closer. "I'd love to."
With a kiss Chloe left the apartment, with promises of dinner the next night. Even with these promising words, Beca couldn't help but feel upset.
Tears were falling down Beca's face before she even realized what she was doing. Why am I crying? This is what I wanted. I wanted Chloe. And now that Chloe loves me she will convince the other girl's to love me…I'll be back. I won't be a failure.
"She'll leave me though." Beca whispered into the darkness. "Everyone does."
And why not? Who could possibly love someone so fucked up like her?
"Stop fucking crying!" Beca hissed at herself. "Aren't you supposed to be strong? That's hilarious. So fucking funny."
Without any hesitation, Beca whipped out her blade. She needed to be punished. She needed to feel pain. If no one else was going to give her the pain she deserved, she would have to do it herself.
R we still on 4 dinner tonight?
Beca felt her phone vibrate towards the end of her Intro to Philosophy class and managed to sneak a quick look at her text.
Smiling she managed to reply quickly before the professor could notice.
Sounds gr8. How about u meet at my dorm at 7?
Beca smiled as she shut her phone. The professor than dismissed the class and Beca managed to gather her stuff up quickly, hurrying back to her dorm to get ready. Beca could feel spring coming and was terrified what to do once the incoming heat grew too much.
After about half an hour of refiling through her clothes, Beca settled on a maroon tank top, black sweatshirt, and a pair of grey skinny jeans. She was just finishing up her eyeliner when she heard a knock at the door.
"Coming." Beca called out in a voice she didn't recognize. This was Chloe. Why was she so nervous?
Beca pulled the door open, astonished at the red-head's beauty. She was wearing a green button-up short sleeved shirt, and skinny light jeans. Chloe beamed at Beca. "You ready?"
Beca nodded. "Let's go!"
