Chapter Eight-
Beca's lips trembled. "Please don't be mad."
"I just need to know what is going on." Chloe said coolly glancing at Beca's hands, her eyes widening as she saw the exposed cuts on her wrist. "Start explaining. Now."
"Please. Don't." Beca begged, tears already starting to hit her cheeks. "Don't do this to me."
"Beca…" Chloe hesitated. "Please roll down your sleeve."
"I'm not going to hurt you. You aren't ready to see it." Beca said forcefully.
"Beca, I'm already terrified that you hurt yourself in any way and if I don't see the damage I'm only going to think the worst." Chloe said calmly, forcing tears back. She needed to be strong…needed to be strong for the fragile girl she saw sitting in front of her.
"No. I won't show you."
"Why not?" Chloe demanded.
"I didn't mean for it to get this far, okay?" Beca yanked her hands down from Chloe's grip. "No one else can be let in, alright? This is my nightmare, my…my…okay…fine! My problem. And I'll be damned if my girlfriend has to be included in this hellhole that is now my life. You don't deserve to feel this shit."
"You're trying to protect me?" Chloe asked.
"Yeah, I guess so."
"I'm trying to do the same thing. Now, show me." Chloe snapped. Beca curse silently under her breath as the tears started to flow freely out of her eyes. Weak, pathetic tears…
"Please don't be mad at me." Beca muttered quietly. Chloe reached over and began gently rubbing her back.
"It's okay. I won't be mad. I just need to see."
Avoding eye contact with Chloe, Beca slowly rolled up her right sleeve first, revealing the least amount of damage, and then the left sleeve. Chloe held in a gasp.
It was much worse then she had imagined. Criss-crosses of red lines, white lines, pink lines, and some deep slashes that were still dripping with blood laced across her arms, starting at her wrist and continuing up towards the top of her elbow. There was hardly any skin that hadn't been touched by Beca's blade.
"Baby…oh God…Beca…" Chloe was at a loss for words. Every sentence in her head sounded wrong for the situation. "What have you done to yourself?"
Beca looked Chloe dead in the eye. "I deserved it."
"What?" Chloe started to ask when they heard the doorknob turn.
"Shit, it's Kimmy Jin..." Beca muttered, pulling her sleeves down. "Can you-"
"I'm not leaving, if that's what you are thinking." Chloe snapped.
"No. That's not what I was thinking. I don't want you to leave." Beca assured Chloe. "Could we just like-"
"Aubrey's out. We can go to our apartment." Chloe grabbed onto Beca's hand and led her out of the dorm as Kimmy jin walked in.
Kimmy Jin looked the couple up and down. "Stay out of my bed." She nodded.
"That's actually one of the nicest things she's said to me since we started rooming." Beca told Chloe.
"Now, can we please go back to what you were saying?" Chloe asked.
"I don't know...what you're talking about." Beca forced out.
"Oh, really?" Chloe pulled down Beca's sleeve again.
"Stop doing that-" Beca snapped and Chloe paid no attention.
"Look. Look what you've done, baby. Why?" Chloe bit her lip to try to compose herself.
"I deserved it." Beca's eyes darkened into a frightening cold glare that Chloe had never seen before. "I'm a monster. A bitch. A terrible person who ruins everyone's life that she touches and doesn't deserve happiness or love or…God, Chloe, even you!" Beca subconsciously started picking at one of her scabs, blood continuing to stain her hand.
"Beca, Beca, STOP!" Chloe grabbed onto Beca's hand and pulled it away from her arm. "You are none of those things. You are a beautiful and amazing person. How can you see that?"
"Hard to see something that isn't there." Beca spat out between tears. Chloe's heart ached as she stared at the dark haired girl that had always been so strong, completely broken down with tears streaming down her face, cuts covering her arms, and a terrified look in her eyes.
"Come here, Beca." Chloe ordered gently. Without any hesitation, Beca obeyed and scooted closer to Chloe. Chloe then wrapped her arms around Beca and pulled her closer. To Chloe's surprise, Beca didn't resist, and, in fact, rested onto Chloe.
"I don't deserve you." Beca whispered as Chloe lay herself flat on the bed, cuddling Beca closer to her.
"Bullshit. If anything, I don't deserve you." Chloe brushed Beca's hair out of her face and cradled her closer. The younger girl's body shook with sobs and with each sob Chloe held her closer.
"You're so beautiful, and great with singing, and have friends, good people skills…God, you are kind of perfect, Chloe." Beca said. Chloe lightly kissed the top of her head.
"You're original, you're beautiful, intelligent, hilarious, and far too amazing to be suffering with these demons."
"It's my fault. I brought it on myself."
"Don't say that." Chloe snapped. "Don't ever say that. There is some sort of problem, a demon you have to deal with. You didn't bring this on yourself. I know you. You must be really suffering."
Beca remained silent as Chloe brushed her hair back, a lot like how Beca's mom used to…when she was still around.
"We'll get throught this. Together. I won't leave you because of this. I will never leave you. Alright? We will get through this."
Chloe held onto Beca until the young girl's shaking slowly relaxed and her eyes shut. The poor girl had tired herself out from crying. Chloe shut her eyes as well, never letting go of Beca.
And that's how Aubrey found them.
"What. The. Fuck." Aubrey greeted the girl's when she walked through the door, keys falling to the floor. While Chloe was awaken by this, Beca only stirred a bit.
"Aubrey, shut up. Let her sleep." Chloe hissed at Aubrey. She could sense in Aubrey meltdown approaching and gently shook Beca off of her.
"Don't leave me." Beca murmured, her eyes staying shut.
"I'll be right back, baby. I have to…go to the bathroom."
"Okay." Beca agreed and curled into a ball, looking so young and vulnerable. Chloe dragged Aubrey to the bathroom and locked the door.
"Don't you dare yell." Chloe warned Aubrey.
"Explain. Now." Aubrey demanded.
"Well…what you saw…Beca's my girlfriend." Chloe finally admitted. Aubrey stared at her for a moment. Chloe tried to decode the expression on her face. Hate? Disgust? Anger?
"You're…you're gay?" Aubrey asked in almost a whisper.
Chloe took a deep breath. "Yes. Yes, I'm gay."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Aubrey asked.
"I…"
"I mean, I'm your best friend. Why didn't you tell me?"
"Are you mad?"
"Oh, Chloe." Aubrey grabbed onto her hands. "I'm only mad because you didn't tell me. I mean, seriously. We've been bet friends for almost four years and you couldn't trust me with that?"
"I was afraid of losing you." Chloe admitted.
Aubrey shrugged. "Yeah…I may be uptight and all of that stuff but I would never throw away and amazing friendship with someone just because they were gay. I love you, Chloe. You're my best friend and nothing will ever change that, okay?" Aubrey paused. "Now…with that being said, you couldn't have chosen anyone besides her?"
"Aubrey…" Chloe warned. Aubrey paid no attention.
"Her attitude is for shit, she ruined our chances at becoming champions …"
"Well, we're continuing anyway, aren't we?"
"She has no regard or respect for anyone but herself and I swear to God if this girl hurts you I will rip her in half."
"There's more to her then you know, okay Aubrey?"
"If she hurts you…" Aubrey shook her head.
"She's not."
"How can you be so sure?" Aubrey demanded.
"I trust her." Chloe said, proudly.
Aubrey sighed. "I just feel you deserve better."
Chloe smiled a bit. "Aubrey, I have not been this happy in a long time. Beca is exactly what I've been looking for."
"She's not getting back in the Bella's just because you're dating her." Aubrey snapped.
"So now you're the only one in charge of the Bella's? Shit Aubrey!"
"We are better without her. Please don't fight with me about this." Aubrey glanced at her watch. "We have Bella rehearsal tomorrow. If I don't go to bed now, my vocal cords will be a mess. We can finish this conversation tomorrow." Aubrey thought for a moment. "Please don't have sex with Beca tonight, you need to rest too."
"So she can stay for a while?" Chloe asked, eagerly.
"I suppose." Aubrey smiled. "If it makes you happy, I guess. Just please don't be too…loud."
"Fine, fine." Chloe grinned and practically ran back to Beca. Aubrey waited until she was gone to groan.
"It had to be her." Aubrey mumbled and headed to her bedroom. "Couldn't be anyone else…"
