Written For:
- Day 32 of 366 Days of Writing Challenge: Fake
- Candy from the Trolly: Blood Flavoured Lollipop: (challenge) Write about a prank gone wrong.
Pairings/Characters: Walburga, Sirius, Regulus
Word Count: 586
Prank of the Century
Well, they're never gonna get me, I'm like a bullet through a flock of doves.
Regulus hung back tentatively, while Sirius sneaked into their parent's bedroom. Walburga and Orion were fast asleep, as it was well before six in the morning. Walburga would arise promptly at six as she did every morning, which was far too early for Regulus, especially during the summer holidays, but thirteen-year-old Sirius had assured his younger brother that waking up so early would be worth it.
"It's going to be hilarious," Sirius whispered. "As soon as she wakes up and grabs her wand—" he pressed a hand over his mouth to stifle his laughter, and raised the object he was holding. It was a fake wand, from Jonko's Joke Shop.
"It's just a fake wand," Regulus scoffed. "It's hardly the prank of the century."
"That's where you're wrong, little brother," Sirius assured. "This fake wand has been hexed. It will turn to custard as soon as she touches it."
Regulus looked sombre. "So how come it hasn't turned to custard already?"
Sirius revealed that he was holding the wand through the fabric of his pyjama shirt, and not making actual skin contact. Regulus shrugged.
"I don't want anything to do with it when it goes wrong." He hung back as Sirius began to creep through the threshold of their bedroom.
He proceeded to quietly take his mother's wand from the bedside table, and hide it in the drawer. He then carefully placed the fake wand on in place of the real one. Regulus was admittedly impressed - the wand was a very realistic replica, and in Walburga's sleep-hazed state, she wouldn't notice the fake wand when she was grabbing it upon waking.
Regulus looked at his watch, which read five-fifty-five. She would be waking up in five minutes. When he looked back up, Sirius was tip-toeing back towards the hallway—but there was something wrong. The space beside Orion was empty. His mother was out of bed.
Regulus shot his gaze back to Sirius, who was suddenly wide-eyed, staring at the space behind Regulus. He turned around slowly, and came face-to-face with his mother, who was standing mere inches away from him. She looked just as intimidating, even in her night cap and gown. Her arms were folded, and she was holding a wand in her hand—Regulus suspected that it was the fake wand, but for some reason, it hadn't turned into custard.
"You shouldn't sneak around this old house at night," Walburga told the pair of them sternly. "You don't know what might bite you." She extended the wand towards Sirius. "I believe this is yours?"
"Yes, Mother," Sirius admitted, hanging his head.
"So, take it."
Sirius blinked up at his mother, and Regulus gave him an encouraging nod. After all, the wand hadn't transformed—Walburga must have lifted the hex from it. His mind boggled as he tried to imagine how she had caused them both to believe that she was still laying in bed, just a couple of inches away from Sirius when he had been trading the wands.
Sirius reached out for the wand, and as soon as it touched his palm, it burst. Thick globules of bright yellow custard spurted over his hands and chest. Regulus had caught some of the back spray, but somehow, Walburga remained untouched. She sidestepped her sons and walked into her bedroom, turning to offer them both a smirk.
"You'll have to try harder than that to fool me."
