7 YEARS LATER
A part of me hoped he was joking. I'd lost so many people over the last years; Lily and James had passed away, Sirius was locked away in Azkaban (wrongfully I was sure), Harry had been sent to the Dursley's, Peter had apparently been killed by Sirius and Remus now wanted to leave me. It felt like I'd been shot, I hadn't even anticipated it.
"Why?" I asked, watching him pack up his things. His back was turned towards me but I knew his every little habit by now and I knew him enough to know that he was doing this against his will. "I can't watch you leave without giving me a reason, Remus."
With a sigh, he put his now fully packed suitcase on the bed and turned to look at me. "I don't –"
I levelled him a look, not bothering to hide my hurt. "And I want the truth."
"I love you," He explained and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. "Merlin, I love you too much to keep doing this to you. I see what it's like for you when I have to disappear for days before each full moon and you have to support me financially because no one's willing to hire a werewolf – I'm nothing but a burden to you."
A silence followed his words where he was determined to avoid my eyes. Closing the distance between the two of us, I stood in front of him. Looking up into his eyes I let out a sigh.
"You clearly don't think very much of me," I said softly, cutting him off when he went to disagree with my words. "If you didn't then you wouldn't even think that I thought of you as a burden Remus. I love you too much think of you as burden. And why exactly would I think of you as a burden? Because of your condition? Because the wizarding world is too prejudice to look beyond it to see what a wonderful man you are? Merlin Remus, I don't understand."
"I make your life much harder than it needs to be –"
"Without you I wouldn't have a life to live." Smiling softly up at him I tugged on the bottom of his sweater. Taking the hint he stepped closer to me and I wrapped my arms around his waist, hugging him. "How could you forget the number of times you saved me when I was being attacked by the death eaters? If it weren't for you I wouldn't be standing here."
Pressing my cheek against his chest, I relaxed when I felt him wrap his arms around me as well. His hands moved gently up and down my back.
"This isn't the life I want for you." He admitted, tightening his hold on me. "I don't want you to be embarrassed –"
"I could never be embarrassed of you." I cut in.
"I know, I know." He acknowledged softly. "But I can't marry you – you know that don't you?"
I pulled away from him at his words, looking up into his face curiously. He was serious, his eyes scanning my face for even the slightest change in expression. Letting out a sigh I ran my fingers gently across the scars on the side of his face.
"I know." His eyes flickered with surprise. "And I don't expect you too either. All I want is to live my life loving you and getting your love in return Remus, that's all. Whether I live until I'm over 100 or whether I die at a young age, that's all I want."
"We won't ever be able to have kids in case they gene gets passed onto them –"
"Why are you so determined to push me away Remus?" His words were starting to hurt me. "I know first-hand that you want children but if you're so adamant on it then it's fine by me. I'd have no regrets in living my life with you alone."
"And you wouldn't care if we did have children and they had the gene? You wouldn't blame me."
"Of course not, you stupid man."
Letting out a slight sigh, he pulled me back into his arms. He burrowed his head into the side of my neck and I wrapped my arms around his slightly shaking form.
"How can you still look past my faults and love me despite all of that?" His words were muffled against my skin.
"I don't," I muttered, rocking him slightly. "I see all of you Remus, the good and what you consider to be the bad, and I love you. I can accept all of that the same way you can accept every part of me."
We stayed like that for a while, me embracing my tall boyfriend who was clearly lost in his thoughts. When he'd finished with his thoughts, he pulled back from me and I watched him cautiously. Stepping away from me, he headed back towards his suitcase.
"I've said all I wanted to and if you still want to leave then I won't stop you," I said quietly, walking out of our bedroom and leaving him alone.
I was moving around the kitchen, trying to prepare dinner but it was difficult to keep my mind on the task. Was I supposed to cook for 1 or 2 people? What had spurred on Remus' sudden decision? What was I supposed to do when he was gone? Who would remind him to take his potion on time? Would he miss me when –
The clearing of a throat interrupted my thoughts. Looking over my shoulder I found Remus hovering awkwardly by the kitchen door, his suitcase nowhere to be found.
"Why don't I make dinner?" He offered, walking into the room and taking the knife from my hand.
"Remus –"
"I won't burn it," he said with a gentle smile. "Don't worry."
