Chapter 6: Cloak Of Confidence
It was their first night back at school and Rose, surrounded by a bunch of other Gryffindors, had been about to enter the Great Hall for dinner when she was stopped unexpectedly. She jumped involuntarily as she felt an arm snake around her waist and a pair of lips press against the skin behind her ear. Scorpius Malfoy whispered "shhh," into her ear and Rose cursed herself. Cursed herself for forgetting, cursed herself for thinking it would be him.
She forced a smile onto her face and turned around to face her 'boyfriend'. Knowing that everyone was watching she wrapped her own arm around his waist and kissed him softly, quickly. Knowing what it was that he was after, she turned to her friends. "Mind if we have a minute?" she asked, "I'll meet you inside."
Some of them where glaring, others smirking suggestively. The news had spread of their dating, much to Rose's delight. Less delightful was the strangely high proportion of people who'd claimed not to be surprised by the news. Like she would ever. Please, she had standards.
Ignoring her friends, Rose took Scorpius by the hand and led him away, not waiting for an answer. She only stopped once they were out of sight and earshot, dropping his hand right away.
Scorpius shoved his hands into his pocket and leant against the wall. "Right," he said, staring down at Rose. "How's this going to work?"
They'd started the act almost immediately after Scorpius had agreed to go along with it, the night before. It'd been during dessert in the silence that accompanies the eating of really good food when Rose had announced, quite casually and with a spoonful of ice-cream halfway to her mouth, "Scorpius and I are dating."
Even Scorpius had nearly choked on his pudding in shock. The uproar that erupted at this was even greater than when Scorpius had been blown from his chair earlier in the evening. They appeared to have forgotten that Scorpius was a) there, and b) actually quite accepted by them. Accepted, it appeared, as Al's best friend but not as someone to date one of them. Or maybe it was just surprising; after all it couldn't have been expected, seeing as it wasn't even real.
Scorpius, only slightly (completely and utterly) terrified of what Rose's dad was going to do, made sure to avoid all eye contact with him and instead looked away, turning his head to the left. Albus was sitting there, mouth hanging open, still holding a spoon halfway to his mouth. When he noticed Scorpius looking at him he seemed to snap back into reality and glared murderously at him. Scorpius gulped. How could he have forgotten?
Al had just told him a few hours ago that he wasn't allowed to be even interested in any of his cousins and now it appeared he was dating one. No wonder Al was mad. But Scorpius hadn't even thought about that, he hadn't even dreamt of the connection that Al could so easily make. Scorpius didn't care for Rose, like that at least. He'd agreed to go along with Rose's little act, thinking that it wasn't a big deal at all. But Al didn't know it was just that -an act-and now it appeared that Scorpius had been hiding it from him the whole time.
Al Potter was not someone you'd want to be angry at you (and he looked beyond angry) but luckily he was also not one to cause a scene, and a scarily good actor. So when he got to his feet and shot Scorpius a particularly venomous stare before slipping towards the door. Scorpius knew straight away that Al wanted him to follow him. Usually that would be reason enough for Scorpius (who was by no means scared of Al) to stay right where he was. An irritated Al was always amusing and Scorpius would usually just flash an oblivious grin his way and watch Al fume at him in return. But an angry Al was not so amusing, and as much as they liked to rile each other up, they were still best mates and Scorpius was well aware of where the line between harmless teasing and downright cruelty was (at least most of the time). He really had some explaining to do. He sighed before getting to his feet and following Albus out of the room.
He was quite aware, as he rose from the table, of a certain pair of eyes looking right at him, the only one whose attention wasn't completely preoccupied by Rose. He bit down on his lip and turned away quickly, involuntarily, and it wasn't until he'd passed through the door and out of the room that he realised that he'd forgotten to send his usual teasing (flirting, he would've called it) smile their way.
He'd shoved the thought away quickly.
"What are you playing at?" Al had spat, the moment they were alone, his bright green eyes narrowed and flashing furiously.
Without even needing to think about it, Scorpius knew he would tell Al the truth. And he did. That was just how it was with them. The possibility of lying to Al didn't even cross his mind. Whatever you could say about each other as friends, about their constant fighting and mocking, sometimes playful, sometimes downright offensive, they were honest and loyal. …Well, to each other at least.
Scorpius eventually managed to calm Al down enough to get the story straight (wands, threats, and threats with wands may have been involved). Al had been confused at first and still a little angry, but it wore down quickly to exasperation. "That is so typical," he had said, rolling his eyes. "Trust you two." He shook his head and sighed dramatically. "Great, just brilliant. How fucking fantastic."
Scorpius sent him his most charming smile. "You know you love us," he said, voice silky smooth, his eyes glinting wickedly.
Al whacked him swiftly over the back of the head.
It wasn't long then until he snapped into business mode, talking in what Scorpius considered to be his "Captain voice." He demanded to know the exact terms of their agreement and Scorpius had had to frown and tell him that he didn't even know.
That was why Scorpius was there the next day, demanding answers from a too flippant Rose. They worked it out eventually, though. They were to act like a couple in public and only Al knew (and could know) the truth.
There was only thing that Scorpius still wondered. He hesitated as he tried to work out how to word it. To anyone else he would've just said it straight out, with a sly smile and possibly -if he was feeling corny enough- a wink. Rose was different though. She was rather intimidating for someone so small and freckly and Scorpius was quite wary of her (she had after all, practically kidnapped him and shoved a wand into the base of his neck).
"What about," he said the next words delicately, "other people? Am I allowed to…" he trailed off, knowing she'd catch the implication.
Rose's eyes widened and she grinned mischievously. "Other people?" she repeated, and her gleeful, somewhat teasing tone confirmed that she knew exactly what he meant. "Who are these 'other people' you have in mind?" she asked innocently.
Just one person, said a voice somewhere at the back of his mind, which Scorpius pointedly ignored.
"Contrary to your apparent belief, Rosie, you are not the only attractive girl in this castle."
Rose raised an eyebrow, eyes shining. "You think I'm attractive?" she said, sounding amused, and there was something in the way she said, so casual and teasing, that had Scorpius wanting to respond defensively.
"Stop getting distracted," he said, even though he'd gotten quite distracted from that matter at hand himself.
"I'm not," replied Rose, still grinning infuriatingly.
"Then answer the question," Scorpius countered. "And stop grinning. It's irritating."
"What was the question?" she asked, eyes widening innocently.
Scorpius looked annoyed. Rose appeared to be the only person capable of drawing a noticeable emotional reaction from him, even if it was just one of irritation. He opened his mouth to snap back a retort but she interrupted.
"Just kidding, I remember. I just want to know who you're interested in."
Scorpius felt his stomach drop. "I'm not," he said, continuing in that annoyed tone, "Wait- I didn't even say anything about anyone specific." He narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
Rose laughed, and shrugged. "You didn't need to. Actually I wasn't even sure myself until you confirmed it for me just then." She grinned evilly and Scorpius narrowed his eyes, furious.
He didn't know what it was about Rose that got to him so much, but he always found himself biting back his irritation in her presence. And it just made it all the worse that she knew how easily she could bait him, that she enjoyed doing so. When he scowled she grinned, when he narrowed his eyes she laughed. Sometimes he was lucky and it'd play the other way around, but for the moment at least, Rose had the upper hand. For all their differences they were very much alike and they clashed, hard. So how was it that they ended up in this situation together? They both loved to push the boundaries, to wind other people up and neither could knock back a challenge. In each other it seemed, they met their match.
He would've retorted (if he could find the words) but Rose was speaking again. She seemed to have decided to let Scorpius off easily this time and brought the conversation back on track. "Yeah," she said, and Scorpius seemed to snap back into himself, "You can do whatever with whoever, we're not really together after all. But people need to think we are so just keep it discreet, and don't let them know the truth. You can just let them think you're cheating on me or whatever." She smirked, glancing at him sideways. "It is you after all, they won't be surprised."
"I don't know what you're talking about," he replied in a mock haughty tone, "I am an extremely honourable person of outstanding moral fibre."
Rose snorted. "And I'm a hippogriff."
Lucy had barely stepped through the dormitory door when she was almost knocked over by a pair of arms being flung around her neck.
"Lucy!" the girl squealed.
Lucy laughed and hugged her back. "Cassie! Oh my god, how are you?"
Cassie just hugged her tighter. Lucy awkwardly patted her back in return. There was a dry laugh from the other side of the room. "Let the poor girl breathe Cassie, she's not even through the door yet." Lucy glanced over to see Norah Jones, the "sensible" one of the group, lounging back on her bed and shining her prefect badge casually. Lucy shot her a thankful grin and Norah winked back.
Cassie dropped her arms and stepped back, her eyes were shining brightly and she was practically –no, literally- jumping up and down with excitement. Lucy could tell she had news. So she shot a teasing smile at Cassie and made her way over to her own bed and flopped onto the covers. Ahh, it was good to be home.
With a manic grin that just wouldn't disappear, Cassie followed Lucy over to her bed and jumped onto it herself. Lucy glanced over at Cassie. She was staring right at her, still beaming wildly. A small smile formed on Lucy's face and she closed her eyes, purposely ignoring her friend.
"Oh, go on, Lucy," said Norah, rolling her eyes. "Ask her what it is before she explodes."
Opening her eyes Lucy grinned. She rolled onto her side and propped her head up on her hands. "Darling Cassandra," she began,"Is there something you'd like to share with me?"
Lucy hadn't thought that it would be possible for Cassie to smile any wider, but it appeared it was. "Timothypetersaskedmeout," she gushed.
"Sorry, what?"
Cassie took a deep breath. "Timothy Peters asked me out," she repeated, slower this time although her eyes were shining. "And I said yes!"
"Really?" Lucy's tone was dry, a dark eyebrow raised.
Cassie frowned. "Don't get all sarcastic on me, Lucy Weasley," she said. "Aren't you happy for me?"
"Of course!" exclaimed Lucy, trying to smile convincingly, because she was happy for Cassie. The girl had been crushing on Tim for years after all but really, another friend with a boyfriend? Lucy was sure she'd be the only single one left soon. Which as much as she wished it didn't bother her, did.
Seemingly disappointed with Lucy's response Cassie quickly turned the attention off herself to hide her embarrassment. "I'm not the only one with news," she grinned, shooting a pointed look at Norah who blushed lightly.
Norah? Blushing? This must be something. Lucy turned her now eager eyes on the prefect and raised an eyebrow in question.
Norah averted her eyes, focussing once again on cleaning the already shiny clean badge (and since when had she ever cared about wearing the badge, let alone having it polished, Lucy wondered). "I slept with Lukas," she said lightly.
Lucy's eyebrows skyrocketed to her hairline yet her heart plummeted in her chest. And she hadn't even kissed a guy. "Oh wow, err… congratulations," she managed to say eventually.
Norah rolled her eyes, shaking her head fondly. "You're so awkward, Lucy."
Lucy laughed but oh Merlin, it was so true. She was going to be alone forever.
Luckily, she was saved from having to try to summon a proper response by the arrival of more of their dorm mates bursting through the door.
"Good news," said Rorie Jenkins by way of introduction (oh no, not another), "I think Louis Weasley is finally taller than me." Part of Lucy sighed in relief and she laughed in amusement. Rorie wasn't even that tall, but she had an obsession with height. She hated it when guys were taller than her (and the guys here are all far too short –her words, not Lucy's). "I saw him in the corridor earlier and I think he's got a good inch or so on me now."
"Oh my god, Rorie, can you please refrain from stalking my cousins!"
"Lucy darling, everyone here is your cousin. If I can't stalk your cousins than who can I stalk?"
"I only have four male cousins!" exclaimed Lucy, uselessly, as conversation had already moved on. She rolled her eyes and burrowed her head into the covers, as the excited conversation around her continued around her. Usually she'd be as much a part of the animated discussion as any of them but something felt different, although everyone seemed much the same, and she closed her eyes, hugged her pillow to her and just listened quietly.
Louis was interrupted on his way to his dormitory, as he passed through the Ravenclaw common room, shortly after he arrived back at school. Four of his fellow sixth years sat on the armchairs by the fire. Sammy Fawcett, a pretty, friendly girl waved to him as he passed. "Hi Louis!" she beamed. Her boyfriend, Ryan Gelding, tightened his arm around her waist possessively and glared at Louis through narrowed eyes. Alex Montgomery was pointedly avoiding any eye contact, and instead appeared to be examining the midnight blue carpet as if it was the most interesting thing he'd seen all day.
Louis stifled a laugh; a part of him would always find it funny how most guys considered him a threat. If only they knew…
Sammy's best friend, Kate Lowsley who sat on Sammy's other side, echoed her friend's smile but her's was softer, shyer. "Hey," she said.
Louis gave what was meant to be a friendly nod in their direction yet appeared, he was sure, like some sort of head spasm. Inwardly cringing at his own awkwardness he forced a smile their way and continued on towards the spiral staircase, tripping over his own feet slightly.
Upon reaching the sixth year boy's dorm, Louis pushed through the heavy wooden door and was greeted by a familiar sight. Once he would of smiled as he took the sight of his big, comfortable four poster bed, the floor to ceiling bookcases that framed the walls of the circular room and best of all, the large bay window that provide the stunning view of the Black Lake and surrounding mountain range but now the sight was too familiar, too confining; the same old.
Timothy Peters looked up from where he was rummaging through his trunk and smiled the smile that had always used to make Louis's heart race. Things were different now, though, and Louis could smile back easily. They exchanged polite greetings as Louis made his way over to his own bed. Tim was the only one of his dorm mates that Louis talked to regularly and genuinely felt comfortable around, but Tim was quite popular and had plenty of his own friends so they really didn't speak that often. Conversation was easy enough with him though, although it died down after a minute or so.
"Where's-?" Louis began a little while later, looking around, before his question was answered by a loud yowl and a furry form flying down towards him. He cried out and ducked, reaching out to cover his head with his hands. He wasn't quick enough though and it landed upon the top of his head, claws scratching his face. "Bloody cat!" he spluttered, pulling it into his arms. Pebbles nuzzled into the crook of his neck, purring affectionately.
Tim was staring at him, eyebrows raised. "That thing is mental," he stated.
Louis hummed in agreement, his attention on his cat. "He's gorgeous," he cooed, scratching the delighted cat under the chin as it purred contently.
Tim rolled his eyes with a knowing smile that Louis didn't see, as the door opened and more people filled in. Bryce Arnold was fretting about homework, already. Louis scowled at the mere reminder and fell back onto his bed with a sigh. Pebbles curled up on his chest.
Bryce started listing the classes he had the next day and Louis picked at a loose thread in the bedspread with more force than was probably necessary.
Classes, homework, sleep: the same old routine.
He was bored already.
Al reached the Slytherin table alone, after being abandoned at the doors to the Great Hall by Scorpius who disappeared after Rose.
Al knew very well that Scorpius and Rose were only pretending to be dating, but that didn't mean he was entirely happy with the situation. The two of them were trouble enough on their own and he shuddered at the thought of them together, but he knew better than to try to tell either of them what to do. In the end he was left with no real choice but to just deal with it.
He didn't like being left there alone either, not that he'd ever admit to it. He was uncomfortable and far too aware of the stares he was attracting as he took his lonely seat. He reacted to his discomfort the only way he ever seemed to be able to; coldly. He narrowed his eyes in a glare that had some nearby first years scurrying out of his way as slipped down onto the bench. He automatically felt bad but he pushed the feeling down. They shouldn't stare.
Al received enough stares as it was but it was even worse on the rare occasions when Scorpius wasn't there beside him. Or did it just feel that way? Could he not cope on his own?Scorpius lapped up the attention, whether positive or negative, while Al preferred to hide in his shadow.
Al wished he could react to these situations the way his brother James did so naturally; with a friendly grin and a confident ruffle of his messy hair. The younger students loved James and looked up to him with awed respect. Al on the other hand, along with Scorpius, was regarded with terrified fascination. While James was warm and inviting, Albus was cold and withdrawn. It was obvious who they liked more.
Al and Scorpius were a curious, yet formidable pair; the son of the saviour of the world and the son of a Death Eater. The younger students would stare and whisper about them behind their backs but would cower under a single look from either of them. Most would never dare attempt to converse with them. Al felt alienated from most of the student body, as if he was always an arms length away. It was pretty much just the two of them in their own little world but it suited Al just fine. They could say and do just about whatever they liked, not needing to worry about consequences or what people thought. They were inaccessible, untouchable. But when Scorpius was gone Al felt as if the bubble had been burst, his confidence shattered. As if he'd fallen back to Earth and his senses had been returned and he was left far too aware of the eyes and the voices, their pressure upon him. He felt pathetic and weak.
Scorpius wasn't the only person Al liked to hide behind though. Best friends were one thing, girlfriends were a whole other.
There was someone else, a cloak of confidence and acceptance that he slipped into whenever he was blessed with her presence. She could make him forget his problems as easily as she could cause them.
He scanned the long length of the table, his heart rate increasing at the mere thought of her. It only took a moment for him to find her, his green eyes fixing on her face as automatically as breathing. Jessamine Zabini. Jez. Long dark hair, brown eyes flashing bright, perfect make-up, blinding white teeth, tight uniform, loosely hung Slytherin tie; Al's breath caught in his throat.
She must have felt his eyes on her for she turned to face him. She grinned deviously when his eyes met her's and Al was able to forget the world again. He hadn't even noticed he'd done it but he'd slid down the bench across where the first years had been previously and stopped once opposite her. "Jez," he greeted, a smile unfurling from the corners of his mouth.
"Potter," she replied. Her voice was light, seductive and she was smiling too. She learned towards him in an action he mirrored. Her slim, pale hands reached for the hair at the nape of his neck, her fingers tangling into his thick, dark hair and she pulled him towards her, greeting him with a kiss far too inappropriate for a school dinner.
Rose entered the doors of the Great Hall very conscious of the arm around her waist and the hundreds of eyes upon her, upon them.
She felt uncomfortable being so close to him. Acting in this affectionate manner, his arm around her, their bodies touching; it just wasn't right. As must as she'd been trying to maintain this friendly, flirty manner, it was still just an act and she was finding it hard to breathe, each breathe feeling like her last; dry, painful. She faked a laugh even though Scorpius hadn't spoken and they stopped in between the two middle tables; Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, a few feet from the back wall. Rose made sure her eyes didn't meet Scorpius's even as she stood facing him, too scared of what she'd see in them. She could almost feel him judging her. Her stomach clenched and she felt pathetic, oh so pathetic. And then she did the one thing she'd told herself not to do. She looked -not at Scorpius- at him.
He was staring right at the two of them, his brow furrowed slightly but his expression unreadable. She felt like she was going to cry. This was so pathetic, so stupid. He'd see right through their act, she knew he would. Or even worse, he wouldn't even care enough to give it a second thought. Rose wanted nothing more than to run from the room, from the school even. But she was a Gryffindor. She was brave. Or at least she needed to be.
She could go with Scorpius she knew, join him and her cousin Al at the Slytherin table, even if technically that wasn't allowed (not the first night back at least). She could cower under Scorpius's arm, let them be her distraction and at all costs avoid any eye contact with him.
But she was sick of acting cowardly, appearing pathetic. She was sick of regretting every choice she made, sick of always running away. So she did what she knew she should; parted with Scorpius, and walked alone to her own table with her head held high, back to where she belonged. She could face the disapproving and taunting housemates, laugh with her friends and let him see that she was just fine.
