This chapter was weird and difficult for me to write. Sorry if it shows.


"Edward's been shot."

To hear those three words come out from Emmett's mouth made it feel like I had just taken a bullet myself. All grogginess that had been in my system from just being woken up, immediately dissolved. My body alerted to the alarm in my mind and was fully awake in seconds. I jolted up into a sitting position and cradled the phone flush against my ear.

"What?" I cried, refusing to believe the words.

My mind went into hyper drive as my world threatened to come crashing down around me. There was no way that Edward had gotten shot. No. It just wasn't possible. I hadn't allowed my thoughts to travel down that path previously, but I knew this was my worst nightmare.

I almost started to cry, without even having Emmett say more. Edward could not be hurt. There was no way that I could live through another loss of someone who I loved so deeply. Edward promised that he'd come back. He swore to me that he would not leave me.

Suddenly all of my plans for the future were in jeopardy. Edward was going to come home in June. He would be done; never going back. And then we'd figure something else out. I would go to college and he would do whatever the hell his heart desired, but we would be together. And then someday in the distant future we'd get married and we'd have an amazing life together.

But Emmett's three words sent my world spinning. All of the sudden I wasn't sure that was going to happen. I wasn't sure what was going to happen to Edward. I didn't know anything. That night was the first time I had ever allowed myself to put death and Edward in the same thought. It was fleeting moment, but I knew that it could be a very real reality.

This wasn't supposed to happen to me. I was not supposed to be the army girlfriend who lost her boyfriend without ever being able to call him my husband. My Edward was never going to be the one that got hurt. There were thousand's of soldiers in Iraq and mine was the one whose life was in danger, or already past that stage.

Tears started to flow out of my eyes as the possibilities flew into my mind. If anything bad happened to Edward it would shatter me, and he knew that. God dammit! he promised he'd be safe.

I tried to remember what our last conversation had been. Not on the phone or web cam; those weren't really talks. I couldn't remember the last thing I said to him. Or if I told him I loved him. I panicked as these thoughts began to plague my mind, freaking me out that I wouldn't be able to remember.

"Emmett!" I repeated, on the edge of hysteria, "What happened to Edward? Is he okay?"

Oh my God.

My knees came up to my chest, tangling with the blankets as tears streamed down my face. I had to absolutely stop thinking of the worst case scenario. I needed to know if the man I loved was really hurt.

Emmett had to have heard my distress. His breath was labored as he spoke into the receiver, "I don't know Bella. I will call you as soon as I know," he promised, speaking softly. He was probably trying to assure me that things would be okay. But there was even uncertainty in his voice, "Alright?"

I nodded and snapped the phone shut. It didn't occur to me that Emmett couldn't actually see my nod. I fell into my bed and buried my face in my pillow just in time to muffle my sobs.

Normally I was not the girl who cried over everything. I never cried much until Edward came into my life. And if someone would have told me I would be in this situation, I would have planned a much different reaction then how I was handling it currently.

But I didn't fucking know.

I didn't know where Edward was, or what was going on, I just knew that he was hurt. After thinking about nothing other than his painful past for the last week, this was very intense for me. How many times can one man hurt before he is completely broken?

The next hour was the worst of my life. There's no other way to describe it. I could elaborate on my pain, anxiety and fear, but to do that would mean that it was bearable enough to actually put into words. These feelings were the most intense feelings I had ever experienced. And I wouldn't wish them on the people I hate most in the world.

It's really a miracle that I managed not to wake up the entire house. I took great care to muffle my sobs as best as I could. I knew they would come into my room and each and every one of them would tell me that it was going to be alright. And I knew -however hysteric I may have been at the time- that I would end up lashing out on them. I didn't want to do that.

Minutes before my phone rang I did something I haven't done in years. I prayed. Christian's are supposed to pray; we're supposed to trust in God. But my faith was damaged after my parents died. I went to church, but I knew that my heart and soul really weren't in it.

But now with this awful sense of helplessness, praying seemed like the only thing I could do. I wasn't saying any actual prayers that I had been taught. Instead, God and I were just having little conversation. I begged to let Edward be alright.

When my cell phone rang I was exhausted. I still whipped out to grab it as fast as I could. But I was drained. I knew I wasn't going to be able to make it through anything other than Edward having a minor scratch.

"Bella?" the anxious voice asked, much calmer than the previous phone call.

"Edward?" I let out a shaky breath of relief as I heard his voice. The tears began streaming slowly down my cheeks. I was so elated that I was actually crying. I had never been that relieved in my entire life.

I still didn't know anything. I just knew that he was talking which meant he was well enough to use a phone. That was all I needed to hear for the time being.

"I thought-" the words got choked in my throat, I took another broken breath, "I thought, you, you were…" I couldn't finish the thought, so horrified.

Edward no doubt heard my distress. I heard him exhale, frustrated, "I know baby. I know. I'm so fucking sorry," he assured me tenderly, "I'm fine; just a little nick in the shoulder. It's nothing to worry about."

I let my shoulders fall as I registered his words and accepted them with relief. I closed my eyes, thanking God. I fell back on to my pillows and wiped the tears away from my swollen eyes.

I imagined Edward lying on a bed in some building that was hardly up to standard with a hole in his shoulder. He had Emmett and Jasper sure, but he needed more. It broke my heart that he was 8000 miles away from me and in pain, alone.

"Edward," I exhaled, still freaked out. I wanted to tell him how thoroughly scared shitless I had been. But he hushed me.

"I know, I'm so sorry. Emmett shouldn't have called you. This isn't anything for you to worry about," he promised me.

My head turned to the side in confusion. "You just got shot. Of course that's something for me to worry about," I protested.

Edward sighed regretfully, "But it was unnecessary worry. You didn't need to know. By the sound of it, it only caused you pain. I'm sorry."

My puffy eyes narrowed in confusion as I stared up at the ceiling. Even though I was so glad to be talking to him, I found myself…growing…annoyed. "So, you weren't planning to tell me that you took a bullet?" I clarified.

"Well, I mean you would have seen the scar eventually, but I didn't want to when I wasn't there in person," he explained, like he had been thinking the most logical thing in the world.

I gave him one last shot, giving him a warning of what was about to go down. "Okay. Correct me if I'm wrong. You just got shot. But. You weren't going to tell me?"

"Well, I guess that would be an accurate summary of what we are currently discussing…" he agreed, still not getting it. That's my clueless Edward. Clearly he wasn't lying about being okay.

"Edward," I said slowly, trying not to freak out. "You know I love you, right?"

He was confused. "Um, yeah, I know that," then he added with a chuckle, "I love you too."

I was figuring out the best way to approach this. The man may have just taken a bullet but we were still going to be having words. "Since you love me, would it be up on your priority list to know I had just been, say, mugged and beat up?"

Edward seemed to have caught onto my masked irritation, but he was clearly hesitant to acknowledge that. "Yeah. Of course. You know that."

"But, because I'm the girl, I don't need to know that my big badass invincible boyfriend got shot? Because I can't handle it?"

"Hold up Bella, you're putting sexist remarks in my mouth. I never said that," he argued. I silently groaned.

"By not telling me, that's exactly what your actions said! I never called you a sexist. But don't you dare put those kind of double standards on me," I lectured, growing angrier the more I spoke.

Really? How did he think I would have taken the news if he told me when he came for prom?

What exactly would he have said? Oh yeah snicker doddle, that scar right there? Don't worry; it was just from a bullet a few months back. Let's go find the mafia trying to kill me now! Sorry it took months for me to tell you about them too

"I'm sorry I pissed you off, but I don't know why you're mad at me for trying not to freak you out."

I fought the urge to let out a string of profanities. "I'm mad at you first of all because you weren't going to tell me. But secondly, I'm mad at you for having such a dumbass plan in the first place. If you didn't want to freak me out then don't have Emmett calling me at four in the morning!"

"I was slightly incapacitated at the time!" he exclaimed, defending himself.

I went silent. That was an excellent point. I had to give him that. But I was too stubborn to admit that. So instead, I ignored the remark, and refrained from making a retort. I waited for him to say something, knowing neither of us liked silence.

"I'm going to kill Emmett," Edward muttered, probably not for my benefit.

I wasn't going to explode at him or anything. I was just going to use as much sarcasm I could possibly deal up. "So, was it Emmett's fault that I found out that men are trying to murder you too? Because you sure took your time on that too." I asked, staying deadly calm.

This probably wasn't fair to be having a conversation like this in the current circumstances. He had just gotten shot and I had been awake for the past hour convinced he was dead. I was an emotional wreck and I assumed he was on some type of pain killers. But I knew that wasn't what was affecting his judgment.

"I wasn't sure the best way to tell you. They could hurt you too Bella."

"If you're going to bleed, so am I."

Edward's voice was making it almost impossible for me to stay aggravated at him. I knew he thought that what he was saying made perfect sense. "That's what I was worried about. I don't want to see you in pain."

I stayed silent for a moment, and the finally I asked quietly, "So you hide yours from me?"

"I just wanted to keep you safe," he protested softly, making it easier for me to want to knock him upside the head again.

I exhaled, frustrated but trying not to raise my voice. "This whole knight in shining armor/martyr shit has gotta stop. I know that you are a strong man in every sense of the word. I love you because you've always treated me as an equal. But all this crap about trying to protect me is getting old real fast. I'm a big girl, and if I didn't want to deal with your shit then I wouldn't be with you. Simple as that," I ended, getting more worked up.

Strangely, the silence I was receiving from the other end of the telephone didn't make me regret what I had just said. I had been feeling like this for awhile now. This was an awful time to voice it, and I knew that. But I was seriously fed up with it.

Finally Edward spoke, his voice tired and chastised. "We both need to rest baby."

I frowned. I wasn't done. "But-"

Edward cut me off softly. I was almost surprised there was no irritation in his voice, "You made your point snicker doddle. And I'll think about what you said. I'm sorry, okay?"

Damn…why wasn't I able to stay mad at him for more than eight seconds? "I'm sorry too," I sighed, the annoyance subsiding.

And I was sorry. I was sorry that I was a bad girlfriend and decided that my feelings were more important than Edward. I could make excuses and chalk it up to horrible PMS –which wasn't really a lie- but I didn't want to. I realized I shouldn't have been arguing, and I knew I would regret it. I was already starting to regret it.

But I was only regretting my timing. It was a shitty time to bring up what I had been feeling. I was not going to regret telling him to stop protecting me. I refused adamantly to be that damsel in distress. But I wasn't going for the headstrong, total bitch approach either. I was just so fucking glad that I could still argue with him.

"Ana behibeck," Edward said softly, a foreign language rolling off his tongue beautifully. My eyebrows furrowed. That was not Spanish.

"What language is that?" I asked curiously, momentarily distracted by his sweetness.

"Arabic," he answered and I could hear a grin in his voice. I was smart enough to know that most of Iraq spoke Arabic. I smiled, impressed.

"What does that mean?"

"I love you."

o0o

Edward recovered from his injury and was well enough to be back in duty in a little over a week and a half. I didn't believe that his injury hadn't been severe until I saw him on the webcam walking around and using his right arm with little difficulty.

Since Edward had nothing to really to do except recover, and I was an excellent procrastinator, we were able to talk for those 10 days often. Out of all bad things comes something good. That's what Edward said at one point. Actually his exact words were, "I'd take a thousand bullets just to hear your voice."

Eventually he told me about the actual incident. I learned from Alice that it was very weird that Edward had been hurt by a gun, not unheard of though. I knew the Iraqi people were far less hostile than they had been when we first invaded, and aside from a few resistant's who set off roadside bombs, not many people were harmed anymore.

Edward had told me that he and Jasper were just leaving a school when he got shot in broad daylight. Best guess was that it was fired by someone through a window who then fled. But the strange thing was that only one shot was fired. Jasper thought the gunman had to have been experienced because he seemed to have been going for the neck, knowing where the bullet proof vest ended. Instead he went to the right and hit his shoulder, thankfully his right shoulder.

Apparently Edward didn't see anyone from a window, and Jasper had been too busy shielding a child that had followed them out. He said it hurt like hell, but it wasn't as awful as he had imagined.

So there was that.

Jasper had told Alice that Edward had been shot and she assured me that they had amazing medics serving overseas and that'd he be fine. Esme freaked out more than I did, even after I told her that he was going to fine. And when Carlisle found out, he asked me why I hadn't woken anyone up to stay up with me, they all would have been happy to. Rose heard from Emmett and than she freaked out more than Esme. She was convinced that Emmett was most certainly next.

I was distracted the entire week of school, which really was unfortunate because I failed like three tests. The teacher's all asked me if I was having a problem with the material. I just told them that I was having an off week. Brenner was teaching one of my classes for the week switching with my regular teacher so she could help his 9th graders prep for testing. It was my last class of the day and I was anxious to get home and see if I could talk to Edward.

All the other students were out of the door the second the bell had rung. I on the other hand would be driving on ice with a bunch of other crazy people, so I took my time shoving my textbook into my bag.

"Off week huh?" Brenner asked, settling into the desk and clicking some things on his laptop. I perched on a desk in the front of the room. Evidently I was that student; the one whom all the teachers talked about in the staff room. He looked up from the screen with raised eyebrows.

Brenner was my favorite teacher in the school, and he was a great golf coach. He was probably the only person who I'd actually want to talk to. He was fun and easy going, and I needed to complain to someone who wasn't my family.

"Edward got shot," I sighed. This wasn't general news. He smirked and chuckled, continuing to look at his screen. I raised an eyebrow. Than he realized I was surprisingly not being sarcastic and his eyebrows raised high. He looked almost alarmed, and definitely concerned.

Brenner opened his mouth. And then he shut it. And then it opened one more time before he shut it and tilted his head to the side, giving me a look.

"He'll be okay."

Brenner's eyebrows went down and he nodded. Then he said the only thing I really wanted someone to say to me, just once this past week. "That sucks," he nodded. And I knew that he meant it.

"Oh yeah," I agreed, frowning. This was one of those rare times Brenner was actually being serious.

"Hey, I could talk to Kelly about retaking the test. Who else to do you have? Chris, Holly? You know they'd understand your situation," he offered, listing the rest of my teachers whose tests I failed.

I gave him a small smile. It was only English and Math. Ph. Who needed those?

I shook my head, knowing that they would all let me retake the tests. "No, it was my fault. I could have studied but I didn't. I have to get better at managing this." Especially if Edward stays in the army…I didn't say it, because I didn't even want to think it.

Brenner nodded, not questioning my choice. "When's he coming home?" He was back to looking down at his computer again.

"June 18th," I answered automatically.

"Hang in there kid," he nodded at me. I nodded and gave him a smile before standing up and slinging my back pack over my shoulder.

Yeah Brenner, I silently agreed as I walked out, it really sucks.

o0o

A few days later it was like nothing had ever happened. I still remembered of course. And now that he had actually gotten hurt, it loaded my worry even heavier. But I was learning how to deal with it. I just had to stay distracted, like I had when he left. So I started going to the Sky Dome, since there was still snow. I hit balls for up to two hours each day, just to keep busy. That and I planned on dominating at state this year.

I got home early one day after a trip to the dome. Alice had sent me a text telling me to get home. I assumed it was because she needed to figure out what color of blue she was going to paint the nursery.

But when I got home, Alice wasn't waiting at the door with samples of paint. Concerned, I started to call out her name, wondering where in the house she was. I heard a holler in response. I kicked off my shoes and ran upstairs to the room and bathroom she had. I knocked on the bathroom door.

When all I heard was silence I slowly pushed open the handle. I was about to close the door again when I saw that Alice was on the toilet. But then I saw her face. She looked downright terrified.

"Alice?" I asked tentatively. She looked slowly over at me and blinked, eyes wide. Instead of saying anything, she brought her hand up. Confused I looked over to what she was holding. In her hand was a wad of toilet paper that was heavily stained with dark red blood. My own eyes widened.

I may not have been Carlisle, but I was almost positive that it was not good to be bleeding that heavily when you were pregnant.

"We're going to the hospital," I said immediately.


Waking up without you, it doesn't feel right
To sleep with only memories, it's harder every night
Sometimes I think I can feel you breathing on my neck

Tonight I'm reaching out to the stars
It doesn't matter where you are
I'll hold you again

I wish I could hear your voice
And don't leave me alone in this bed
I wish I could touch you once more
And don't leave me alone in this bed
Not tonight, not tomorrow

Living in these pictures, it never comes with ease
I swear that if I could make this right
You'd be back by now
Alone in this Bed, Framing Hanley


-Sorry it's been so long for an update. And I'm sorry to have left you with such a cliff hanger, but as you all know, life happens.
-Disclaimer: No, Emmett wouldn't have been able to call her. They would have had a blackout. We're just going with fictional use here.
-My Harry Potter Deathly Hallows viewing count is up to 3. Yours?
-Next chapter will be entirely in Jasper's perspective.