Chapter Twenty-two

Wednesday, November 13, 2002 – outside the Hyperion hotel, Los Angeles; morning:

Kate Lockley made her way towards the front doors of the hotel. { Two days, } she thought to herself, { we've been looking for Angel for two whole days, and so far, we got nada. Damn it, this is taking far too long... }

"Morning," she said to Fred and Gunn, nodding at them. She noticed Connor was off to the side, sulking, and Lorne was nowhere to be seen. "Where's the resident demon?"

"Lorne? He left, bit earlier on," Gunn replied grouchily. "Said he's gonna hit some places he hasn't tried yet. Mentioned something about headin' off to Sun Valley, so I dunno if we'll be seeing him again anytime soon."

"OK, you know what? We need to change tactics," Kate decided, looking around at everyone. "Because searching the city like this is getting us nowhere."

"What do you mean?" Connor demanded, getting up and coming over towards her.

"I mean, we've been searching for Angel and Miss Chase the normal way for two days. And what have we got to show for it? Nothing. And that's exactly what we're going to continue getting, if we don't change our whole approach to tracking them down," Kate told him.

"What sort of approach did you have in mind?" Fred asked, looking confused.

Kate took a deep breath. "Magic."

"Magic?" Gunn, Fred and Connor echoed in surprise.

"Yeah. Not that I know much about it, but I'm thinking that perhaps the quickest and easiest way to track those two down is with a... a locator spell, or whatever it's called," Kate said, frowning.

"Well, I guess that sounds good in theory, but there's one vital flaw in your plan. None of us can do magic," Fred shrugged, gesturing to Gunn and Connor. "Can you?"

"No," Kate admitted freely. "But surely you people have to know someone – a witch, a wizard, a warlock or whatever? Someone you can trust to help?"

"Can't Wesley do magic?" Connor demanded, looking around at everyone present, and somehow managing not to fully glare at the Texan woman. Kate had no idea why he was so upset, but since the youth managed to conceal his emotions adequately enough, she wasn't going to pry.

"Not an option," Fred and Gunn said in unison, before looking at each other in surprise. Off Kate's look, the former physicist added, "You didn't see how pissed he was when he left here last night. Trust me; Wes needs time to calm down before we go to him for anything again. A lot of time; like days or weeks, even."

"Anyone else?" Kate sighed.

Gunn shrugged before saying, "Well, guess there's that Magnus Bryce wizard dude we ran into, couple years back – English dated his daughter for a few months. But no way in hell we could ever trust that guy not to stab us in the back!"

"Why not?" Fred asked, Kate quickly guessing how the woman hadn't heard about any of this before.

"Man tried to sacrifice his own kid on his fiftieth birthday! No frickin' wonder how, afterwards, that Virginia girl grabbed her trust fund – then she hightailed it outta that mansion, 'n never went back," Charles snorted contemptuously.

"Anyone else?" Kate asked again, suddenly feeling the mother and father of all headaches coming on.

"Uh, Madam Anita? The woman who restored our memories with that elixir?" Fred asked hesitantly.

"No way. I mean, yeah, she might be able to do the job, or tell us who could – but price that Beverly Hills madam is gonna charge for services rendered? Already know it'll be way outta our league," Gunn said pessimistically.

"Well... what about those three women who placed a protection spell on Lorne's club? What are their names, uh, the Transuding Furies?" Fred said hesitantly.

"You think they're trustworthy?" Connor finally spoke up again.

"I guess," Fred shrugged again. "Only thing is, I have no idea where to find them. I mean, I kinda doubt they'd be listed in the phone book... "

"Don't look at me – I got no clue, either. I know Angel and Cordy have been there, apartment where those three live, but that ain't exactly helpful right now," Gunn said, looking annoyed.

"Well, why don't you just call your demon friend, and ask him? If he's hired them in the past, Lorne should know how to contact them, shouldn't he?" Connor said disparagingly.

"Good point," Kate nodded, ignoring the embarrassed look on Gunn and Fred's faces. "All right, what's his phone number?"

"Uh, I dunno," Fred replied, looking embarrassed. "I mean, Lorne got himself a brand new cell phone yesterday, and – I kinda forgot to get the number off of him?"

"Yeah, me too," Gunn admitted, his facial expression tightening.

"Don't look at me, I don't even own one of those things," Connor said curtly, when all eyes turned towards him.

"Great," Kate groaned, feeling as if mom and pop headache had decided to breed, and a lot of little headaches were coming her way. "All right, I guess there's nothing else thing for it. My car's parked outside, everybody – looks like we're heading for Sun Valley... "


Many hours later – Valley Boulevard, Rosemead; evening:

Liam hurried away from the other pedestrians on the suburban street; he could hear their hearts beating, and their blood flowing through their veins, like red rivers full of life and tempting sweetness.

Clenching his teeth and digging his nails into the palms of his hands, he tried to concentrate on the physical pain to ignore the overwhelming hunger. Liam told himself to ignore that burning sensation in his throat and tongue, which seemed to engulf his whole being into a tight fist, covering his eyes with a red veil of bloodlust.

Liam didn't consciously realize it, but it had been three days since he'd last fed. He hurried his pace, knowing that he needed to find a solution to his problem soon – because getting drunk to ignore the need for blood wasn't going to work, not any longer.

He could feel his self-control slipping away, more and more with every passing second.

Then he smelled something, grasped the hint of something in the air, and he followed his undead nose down several side streets to the back entrance of the slaughterhouse. Thanking God or Satan or whoever had helped him guide him here, Liam broke into the abattoir and started searching for what he needed. His eyes blazing yellow, his skin pale and shiny, and his nostrils flaring with the smell of blood...

He could hear a heartbeat, several in fact. And breathing, too. Not human, not at all. Bigger hearts, bigger lungs, and with a pungent scent of animal excrement; one that was very familiar to him from life in Galway.

Cows.

Sources of blood.

Ignoring the smell, Liam hurried into the chamber where the animals were being held. Growling, with his face fully vamped out and twisted into a grimace of need, he headed towards the first cow he could see and, easily jumping over the fence that surrounded it, got into its pen.

The animal just looked at him, with those brown and incredibly sad bovine eyes. It didn't make a sound as Liam grabbed the cow by the horns and twisted savagely, snapping its thick neck.

Holding the carcass up effortlessly, Liam sank his fangs into the cow's neck, gulping down the already-cooling blood. He drank as much and as quickly as he could, feeling the strength returning to his body as his belly grew full on the animal's blood.

(He didn't know how he knew it, but Liam was nonetheless certain that human blood would taste ever so much better than this. But that led somewhere he did not want to go. Not now. Not ever.)

In the end, Liam tossed aside the drained corpse and allowed himself to fall heavily on his rear end; his back leaning on the metallic fence, while trying to recover his wits. Liam absentmindedly wiped the blood that had drenched his mouth and chin with the back of his hand, but only succeeded in smearing it all over his lips.

"Oh my God, Angel?"

Straightaway, Liam jumped to his feet, growling and cursing himself for being so distracted as not to notice that he now had company. He could hear the heartbeats and the breathing of at least five individuals, even if his eyes were blinded by the unholy light being shone into his face...

"Get that thing outta me eyes!" he shouted, turning away and holding up his arms to shield himself from the abomination assaulting his vision. Grunting with relief when the light ceased being directed at him, Liam straightened up – before recognizing his new companions. Well, two of them anyway.

"What in the name of Finnegan's Irish Myste are you two doin' here?" he growled at Fred and Gunn, before he turned to face the other three. One was a sneering lad roughly his own age, the other a woman fair of face and form with hair the color of gold, and the last one –

"Oh, shite," Liam cursed fearfully, staring at the horned, red-eyed, green-skinned creature in dismay. "Yer the Devil finally come fer me, aren't ye? Well, I'll no' be subject to Hell's tortures without a fight, y'hear me? So have at it, Satan; I'm ready fer battle!"

"Oh, Angel-cake, are you totally barking up the wrong tree," the creature replied with what sounded like sympathy in its voice, much to Liam's consternation. "I mean, look at what I'm wearing. Come on, you really think the Devil wears a suit like this? Not even on his best day!"

Confused, he stared at the demon – Liam had the oddest feeling it wasn't lying to him, this truly wasn't the Evil One incarnate – before transferring his attention back to the fishwife and the Blackamoor. Oddly, there was no trace of fear or hostility on their faces; in fact, they seemed calm and in control, and concerned about something. Him, from the looks of it...

Now even more confused, Liam looked at the woman and the boy. "And who are you two being, then?"

"My name's Kate Lockley," the woman introduced herself, staring at him carefully.

"Connor," the boy practically spat out the name. Then he smirked. "And you really don't remember who you are, do you?"

"I remember who I am perfectly well, ye sneerin' lump," Liam replied, causing the boy – Connor – to scowl at him viciously. "And 'tis odd how ye remind me of me father, may he rot in Hell for all his sins. Just not this one, o' course."

"Really? Fathers. Don't they suck?" Connor said with an evil smile, ignoring the looks the other four were sending him.

"Aye, if I take yer meaning correctly. Is your da a self-righteous bastard, then, like mine?" Liam asked curiously.

Connor chuckled. "Oh, you'd be surprised just what kind of a bastard he is."

"Connor, that's enough," the fishwife said sternly. "Look, Angel, I know you don't remember me, but my name's Fred – "

"Me name's not 'Angel', woman," Liam interrupted her, scowling. "And Fred, is it? Well, that's being as good a name as any other, I'm thinking. What about yerself?" he asked the black man.

"I'm Gunn. Charles Gunn, with two n's," he introduced himself. "And damn. You still got no idea what's goin' on, do you?"

"What do ye want with me?" Liam demanded angrily, ignoring that. "Isn't it bad enough we're all trapped in Hell, together? Do ye have to torment me with pointless questions?"

"We want to help you remember who you really are," Fred said, looking concerned.

"I already told ye, I know who – " Liam started to say.

"Liam of Galway, yes, we know," the blond lass – Kate, she'd called herself, a beautiful name for a beautiful wench he wouldn't mind bedding at the first opportunity – interrupted. "Born 1727, and died 1753, becoming the vampire known as Angelus."

"What?" Liam said numbly, staring at her.

"It's 2002 nowadays, Liam, almost 2003," Kate continued on calmly, looking him straight in the eyes. "And this isn't Hell; it's America. What was referred to as the New World, back in your day. To make a long story short, and leaving out a lot of detail, you've been walking the Earth for two and a half centuries as one of the undead. But thanks to a magic spell which unexpectedly went wrong, you lost all your memories of that time. Just like all the other participants in that particular ritual, you ended up thinking you were seventeen again; and we've spent the past three days searching for you, and Cordelia Chase."

Bothered, bewitched and bewildered, Liam grasped hold of the last name to focus upon. "Are ye talkin' about that annoying fishwife I met, right after I woke up? The wench with the healthy set o' lungs on her?"

"DON'T talk about Cordelia like that!" Connor growled at once, looking angrier than a rampaging bull fenced off from heifers in heat.

"Ah. No offense meant, laddie buck. She yer woman, then?" Liam asked, curiously.

"Yes," Connor said, at the same time Fred, Gunn and Lorne said, "No."

Liam ignored the hateful looks Connor sent those three, and returned his focus to Kate. He could tell she was the one who would most likely be able to best answer his questions. "So, yer saying this is actually the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand and Two? Don't s'pose ye can be showing me any proof o' that, by any chance?"

"Look in your wallet," Gunn shrugged. "You got I.D. in there, driver's license, credit card. Way I figure it, that ought to be proof enough for you?"

Frowning, Liam brought out his billfold and examined the strange things in there, with writing and pictures on them. He saw numbers like 2004 and 2005 on the brightly colored rectangles, and provisionally decided to accept the truth of what he'd just heard, before putting the – wallet – back in his pocket. "All right. Assumin' this isn't all a huge trick, s'posing that I believe ye. What next?"

Kate brought out a small metal bottle, one containing a glowing blue liquid. "Take a sip of this, and the spell will be undone – just like it's been undone for everyone else so far. Well, apart from Miss Chase, of course, since we haven't found her yet."

Suspiciously, Liam accepted the bottle and stared around at the group. "Aye, so ye say. But just outta interest, where's the English pig? What was his name, Wyndam-Pryce?"

"Wesley left as soon as his memories were restored, Angel. He's, uh, he's not actually part of the group, not anymore," Fred replied, looking askance at Connor; who just smirked at her for a moment. "And once you drink that, you'll remember why."

"Again, so ye say. And what guarantees will I be havin' that this stuff won't instantly kill me?" Liam asked, his Irish accent thickening slightly.

"Well, for one thing, I couldn't possibly be so lucky," Connor replied facetiously, before earning himself a smack upside the head by Kate and quickly glaring at her.

Oddly, that was enough to convince him, on top of everything else he'd heard so far; and so Liam removed the stopper, and took a quick gulp of the blue liquid.

It tasted as if a fiery sword had been shoved down his throat to skewer his guts. And then – the memories came pouring back into his brain.

The nine years before meeting Darla in the alley; that hard, crushing pain in his throat, stealing his breath and life at the same time; clawing his way up through the dirt of his own grave; his first victim, the unfortunate gravedigger who'd come to investigate the unusual noises in the cemetery –

"No... no, please... " Liam began to shake as the memories gathered force and tumbled over him in a violent, unstoppable flood, each one a tidal wave of screams, terror and gore. He grabbed his head in anguish and staggered off to the side, trying to shake off the blood-soaked visions. But they continued, relentless and merciless, ripping away at his mind until they threatened to drive him insane.

His inner Angelus, who had been silent – asleep – for the past three days, finally woke up and started pulling against the chains of his soul all over again, jeering and sneering at him.

"NOOOO!" Angel screamed, startling both his crew and the cattle in their pens; who start mooing, restless and upset.

"Angel?" Kate's voice was quiet but insistent.

"Angel? Are you OK? Gosh, are you all right? None of the rest of us reacted that way to the elixir," Fred's voice sounded concerned, and somewhat scared.

"Well, that's the thing, pixie cat. None of us had to cope with the kind of memories that the Dark Avenger here is having to deal with," Lorne's voice was oddly restrained, subdued.

"You mean like what he did to Holtz and his family, when he was Angelus," his son's voice – oh dear Lord, Connor was his son, how could he not have remembered that? – buzzed in his ear.

"I'm – all right. More or less," Angel grunted, managing to bury the bulk of the memories and forcing himself to concentrate on the here and now. "Come on, let's get out of here. Just our luck, some security guard will start making his rounds – and then arrest us all for cattle mutilation... "

No one could argue with that logic, and so they all quickly left the slaughterhouse. Piling into Kate's car and Gunn's truck, Fred gave him something to wipe the blood off his face, and then they all quickly traveled back to the Hyperion. There was an eerie silence throughout the journey; for some reason, no one wanted to discuss what had just happened in the abattoir.

(Angel couldn't help wondering why Fred was sitting with him in the back seat while Connor was up front alongside Kate, and Lorne was keeping Gunn company in the other vehicle. But he instinctively knew not to ask questions about that at this point.)

Finally, they arrived back at the hotel, and everyone got out of the two cars. Angel glanced around and said, "Guys, can you give me a few moments in private with Kate, here?"

Connor and the various members of his crew nodded and headed inside the hotel, even though his boy sent him a questioning look first. "It's OK, son. Go on inside, I won't be long," Angel told him. He then turned to Kate and said, "So – "

"What's a nice girl like me doing in a place like this?" the ex-cop interrupted, arching an eyebrow in amusement.

"Well, actually, I was gonna say something more along the lines of, why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you come looking for me? Kate, don't get me wrong, I'm grateful – more than you can possibly imagine – but still. How did you ever even get involved in all this?" Angel wanted to know.

Kate exhaled loudly, and told him everything. From her initial involvement, when the LAPD had called her in about Connor and Cordelia's makeshift home in the attic above the Natural History Museum, to spending the last few days searching for him. She even mentioned searching for Lorne in Sun Valley earlier today, along with Angel's crew; eventually finding the demon in a lowlife bar on Tuxford Street. Lorne had been talking to a skeevy-looking man wearing an old-fashioned pin-striped suit and a pair of GATs, but Kate didn't dwell on that too much.

"And to answer your first question, regarding the why? It wasn't all that long ago you saved my life, remember? So once I understood the situation, I had to do what I could to help you. It's that simple," Kate finished up.

"Well, like I said, I'm grateful. Doubly grateful," Angel smiled at her, before the smile suddenly turned upside down. "Uh, wait... Cordelia's still missing?"

"Yeah," Kate nodded. "That locator spell the Furies did for you? It didn't work for her. So, either she's somewhere out of range – or else she's, y'know... "

"Dead? No. No way. Cordy came back to us from the Higher Realms for a reason, even if we don't know what it is yet. So the Powers wouldn't let her die, not like this. I'm sure of it," Angel said with utter conviction.

"Well, then, good luck finding her, champ. Because this is the point where I get off the carousel ride," Kate shrugged slightly. Off his surprised look, she added, "I've done what I set out to do, pal. Besides, I have an antiquities business to run – and a life to get back to. So I'm just gonna go inside and say goodbye to everyone, and then go home to get a good night's sleep. Call me if you need anything."

Angel just stared at her in flabbergasted surprise, before the beautiful blond quickly gave him a kiss on the cheek and then strode towards the hotel to say her farewells to the others. But then Kate stopped, turned around and said, "Oh, and by the way? Congratulations on the whole fatherhood thing you've got going with that Connor kid, even though I have no idea how you managed to pull that off... "


A while earlier – Xander's apartment building, Sunnydale; early evening:

Xander made his way home, kinda tired after a long day's work.

It had been very busy at T&P Contracting Supply today, and he knew that better than just about anyone. His boss (former, thankfully!) had been in a big hurry to pack his stuff and leave the Hellmouth as soon as he could; so much so, Harris figured the guy was worried that someone else might make a play for leadership of the Glendale satellite office. Which wasn't totally impossible, granted – Xander knew something about corporate politics nowadays, it was impossible to have gotten to his level in the company without that knowledge – but still, something like that was pretty unlikely.

When Mr. Peterson and Mr. Turner made a decision, they made a decision, after all.

He sighed. At least his predecessor had told him everything he needed to know before hightailing it outta town. So Xander figured that barring any sort of major catastrophe, he should be OK in terms of making sure everything kept running smoothly, at least for the foreseeable future.

{ Oh ye gods, now what did I have to go and think that for? I bet I just jinxed myself completely! } Xander thought to himself in dismay. Who knew what sort of disaster would strike now? It could be anything – from the new Assistant Junior VP he'd appointed today getting eaten by a vampire or a demon, to the Hellmouth itself opening up and spewing Hell's legions out onto the surface of the Earth.

Shrugging, he got out his keys and opened the front door –

"XANDER! Thank the Goddess you're finally here," Willow's nearly-frantic voice shrilled out, even before he could enter his apartment. "What took you so long to come home?!"

{ Ah, right, here we go. I shoulda known – the jinxing couldn't possibly wait until tomorrow, oh no. Of course not; it has to start right now! Well, of course it does. } Xander exhaled loudly and turned to stare at his red-haired best friend, as soon as he entered the apartment. "How about the fact that I have a job and a life that doesn't revolve solely around the Slayage, Will? I mean, someone has to earn enough money for you guys to be able to pay the household bills, and Dawn tells me you're not slipping her any cash to put into Buffy's lock box the way I do."

Oops. He musta been even more tired than he thought; damn brain to mouth filter obviously wasn't working properly. And, ouch. That look on Willow's face – he hadn't seen anything like it since the night she'd caught him and Cordy kissing in the library stacks, back in their junior year of high school.

Hrmm. Maybe he could blame the outburst on his ex-girlfriend's influence lately? It might even be true.

"You, you, you-!" Willow stuttered, almost incoherent.

"What's wrong, Will?" Xander asked, before she could say anything else. "I mean, from the sounds of it, you've been waiting a while here for me to come home. So what's the dire?"

"I – it's Cordy," the witch said, now looking angry. "Earlier today, she found out something that was very upsetting to her. I've been keeping her company because of that, but now, tag – you're it." Willow abruptly turned and headed for the apartment's front door.

"So what upset her?" Xander asked, despite figuring he wasn't gonna get an answer from his best friend.

"You'll find out. Sorry, but I gotta go – after all, I've got to start figuring out ways to earn my own money. Because I wouldn't want you to keep acting as my pseudo-sugar daddy, or whatever!" Willow shouted, before slamming the door shut behind her.

{ Hate it when I guess right that way. And the neighbors are definitely gonna complain to the landlord, if they haven't already, } Xander thought despondently, as he made his way to Cordelia's bedroom. { Damn. All the racket around here lately, it's a miracle I haven't been served with a 'please explain' yet. Guessin' it's just a matter of time, though. That's just the way my life seems to work, nowadays. }

At that moment, Cordelia burst out of her room and brushed past him, heading towards the kitchen. She looked... angry. And lethal. Like something you'd see on the Discovery Channel, ready to devour its prey. "Cordy?"

She didn't reply, and Xander was forced to catch up with her. He grabbed hold of her shoulder and asked, "Cordelia, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong? What's wrong?!" she turned around and screamed at him. "I'll tell you what's wrong! I learned today that I'm not human! Or at least, not completely! And if I hear even one wiseass remark that you've known that for years, I'll kick you smack dab in the nuts, Xander – do you understand me?!"

The reflex was as automatic now as it had been back when they were six or seven years old. He instantly grabbed her into a tight hug, and even though she struggled against it for a moment, Cordelia quickly crumpled into his embrace. Xander quickly and silently thanked whatever gods were listening that his former girlfriend didn't turn into a crying, screaming, thrashing, wailing mess; he honestly wasn't sure he could cope with that right now.

{ Long day. Oh yeah. Becoming even longer with every passing moment. }

"Come on," Xander said, guiding Cordelia to the couch. He was pretty sure they needed to sit down for this conversation. "Tell me what happened. Sorry, Cor, but I am sans clue on what you're talkin' about."

"Willow didn't tell you?" Cordelia sniffed, briefly looking around. "Where is she, anyway?"

Xander shrugged. "She left. And before you ask why, five words or less? Me and my big mouth."

That brought the slight smile to her face that he was hoping for. Nowhere near Cordy's normal national TV commercial smile, of course – maybe a hundred watts instead of a thousand, if that; but at least he'd brought her out of her angry funk for a moment. { Gotta take what you can get on the Hellmouth, after all. }

Then she exhaled loudly, and the light in her eyes quickly vanished. She started talking, and Xander listened as Cordelia described what had happened in the Magic Box earlier today. The revelations that she was infected by some sorta 'dark virus' that was currently inactive, that it might not be possible to restore her memories without activating the latent infection, and that she was part-demon nowadays – all of it.

"Huh," Xander said, after Cordelia finally ground to a halt. "Yeah, I can see now why you'd be upset... "

"Well, duh!" Oops. Obviously, another case of foot in mouth, from the glare on her face. Definitely not doing so hot with the ladies today, like obviously.

{ Huh. Cordy now looks really pissed – }

"Are you paying any attention to me, Doofus? Or are you just staring at my tits, like you always used to when you thought I wasn't looking?" she demanded, her patented Death Glare aimed straight at him.

"Huh? Uh, no! Sorry, sweetheart. I was just – distracted. Evil thoughts, running through my head. Nothing to do with your ta-tas," he babbled. "Not that your breasts aren't worth staring at, of course, on account of they are, they so are – I mean, your chest has got to be one of this country's national treasures. Always has been, always will be – "

"Focus, Dweeb!"

"OK, sure," Xander replied automatically, taking care to avoid staring at the odd combination of outraged annoyance and smug pride on Cordelia's face. He understood the value of surviving to see tomorrow's dawn, like almost any guy would under these circumstances.

Then he grew serious and said, "Um, so, on the amnesia front... guess we're on hiatus in trying to fix that, and getting you back to normal. Still, you probably picked up a lot over the past three days – and besides, you're Cordelia Chase. If anyone can gather up the pieces and start living her life again at this point, it's you. Right?"

She replied reluctantly, "I guess."

"And as for whatever it is you've been infected with, that 'dark virus' thing... you mentioned how Jonathan said you were physically fine right now, yeah?"

"Yeah, and Willow backed him up on that," Cordelia nodded.

"OK," Xander replied, nodding himself. "Then we just gotta be real careful on that front, too. Do that spell regularly from now on, and make sure that you stay fine. Kinda like a mystical checkup, every so often."

"And the other part?" Cordelia asked, studying him closely.

"What other part?" Xander looked at her blankly.

"The demon thing, you IDIOT!" Cordelia yelled, glaring at him as he winced at the volume of her voice. "Didn't you hear me? Somehow, I've become part-demon! Did that fail to register in your idiotic little Harris-shaped brain?"

"Nuh-uh, I heard you say that," Xander did his best to calm down. He reminded himself yet again that mentally, Cordelia was only seventeen years old, and so he had to be patient with her. "It's just, after everything that's happened since you left town – something like that? Doesn't really register on the old weird-o-meter anymore. Been there, done that territory; well, pretty much."

"Huh?" Cordelia looked like she honestly couldn't believe her ears.

"Yeah. I mean, few years back, Giles got transformed into a Fyarl demon for a while. And Ahn, switchin' back and forth between human and vengeance demon? Like I said, that sort of thing doesn't really register as a problem for me any longer," he shrugged.

"You really mean that? You? Mister I Hate Demons and Vampires?" she replied, incredulity in her tone.

"Me? Cordy, you're talkin' to the guy who almost married Anya, former demon who killed unfaithful men for over eleven hundred years," Xander shook his head. "Hey, don't get me wrong, I still hate vamps with a passion; but there are demons which aren't evil in this town, I've met them. Guy named Clem, for example; he even sat down with my side of the family during the wedding that wasn't. Like I keep saying: lot of changes around here since high school."

"So, me no longer being completely human – that isn't a deal breaker as far as you're concerned, in terms of getting back together with me?" Cordy asked bluntly.

"Huh? Well, no – " Xander started to say.

Warm. Moist. Delicious. What – oh, yeah, Cordelia's lips and tongue. No, wait –

Cordy quickly made him lose that train of thought by the simple expedient of grabbing him tightly and kissing him harder, until his mind went completely blank. Kissing him senseless until he almost literally melted into her, moaning and panting with lust and desire.

Suddenly, Xander could remember why he'd wanted to carry this woman into his bedroom the previous night, and totally fuck her brains out...

"No, Cordy, wait – " he managed to splutter, after unlocking his lips from hers.

"I'm done waiting, jackass," Cordy growled, like a lioness. Or a tigress. Or one of those big honkin' cats that look at you like you're a juicy piece of meat, one they'd like to gobble up as soon as possible. "Whatever the reason or excuse or logic for us to stop, forget it. Damn it, Xander, haven't we waited long enough since I came back to Sunnydale? I know I have!"

"Well, guess you're gonna have to wait a while longer," an unfamiliar – yet not entirely so – male voice said, as both of them turned to stare at its source.

Something looking like Jesse McNally – the First Evil – was now standing there in the living room, not five feet away from where they were still wrapped up in each other's arms.

"Because now it's my turn to say something," Jesse/the First said, smiling in a lopsided manner.

"About what?" Cordelia demanded, as she and Xander got up off the couch; even though she still maintained an iron grip on Xander's right hand.

Jesse/the First shrugged. "Oh, I dunno. How about the ethics of my best friend stealing my girl, after staking me in the Bronze that night?"

TBC…


A/N: Well, this is pretty awkward, huh? A certain Zeppo just can't seem to catch a break - unlike Angel's Avengers, now that the vampire in question has finally been returned to normal. We know a lot of you had suggestions about what to do with Soul Boy - the most amusing one was him getting locked up in a North Hollywood drunk tank, and bursting into flames once the sunlight came in through the window and hit Angel's unconscious body - but the guy's got plot armor, so to speak, so no could do. And Guest, your idea about Anya mistaking that mystical shadow for the image of a demonic bunny and accidentally destroying the Magic Box in her terror was kinda amusing, but unfortunately unfeasible. Well, at this particular time, anyway. :) So, we hope that you enjoyed the latest chapter - and please don't be shy in telling us what you thought of it!