Chapter Six:
Finally everyone had left the cabin. It had been a long day. Michael, Dom and St. John had stayed through dinner as they hatched a plan to expose Zeus's scheme to take control of Airwolf. It was as a good plan but with some risk. As String lay in bed waiting for Cait to finish her shower he debated in his mind the risk involved and if it was worth it to keep control of Airwolf. Cait was now in his life even though he didn't know for sure if it was permanent and he had just been reunited with Sinj. On the flip side he knew that Airwolf falling into the wrong hands would be fatal. The only people he trusted Airwolf with was Dom, Cait and himself. In their hands she would only be used for the good. Having her was a big responsibility that he did not take lightly. His mind drifted to earlier this morning when he learned of the risk Cait had taken. If she had been killed he didn't know if he could have gone on anymore. That would have been one more tragedy in his life and the one that he could not live with. His thoughts were interrupted as Cait stepped out of the bathroom. He was waiting to have a talk with her about what happened but that was not going to be the case. She was totally naked as she finished drying off. Damn how he loved her.
Cait saw him looking at her as she reached for her night shirt. Before she had a chance to pull it on he was out of bed and to her. She giggled as he pulled her to him and into bed. She was relieved that they would spend time making love instead of talking about what had taken place the last few days. They needed each other's unspoken reassurance that everything was going to be fine as long as they were there together
Two hours later Cait was lying content in Strings arms as he stroked her hair. "We need to talk" she said sitting up to face him.
"I know" he said as he positioned himself sitting up placing a pillow behind his back.
"So how angry are you with me?" Cait asked as she tried to hide her nervousness. She knew that one of the reasons he never let himself fall in love with her was his belief that something would happen to her. She knew it was always in the back of his mind.
Strings eyes went wide. "Angry? Cait I was never angry, I was scared, afraid of losing you. I admit that when you told me what happened I was upset." Cait started to speak but he put a finger to her lips. "Upset that you put yourself in danger but not mad at you."
Cait suddenly felt she needed to remove herself from his proximity. Now was the time she needed to be truthful about everything. She got out of bed and paced the floor. String was beginning to feel sick to his stomach. She was about to tell him how she really felt. He also wanted to remove himself but not from the bed but from the cabin. He sucked in a breath afraid to release it.
Cait stopped pacing the floor and stood still in front of him. "String I was afraid to tell you about what happened because I'm always waiting for you to decide that loving me is too hard especially if "we" or more to the point "myself" gets into a dangerous situation. I find myself waiting for you to tell me this is not working out." Cait turned her back to him not wanting to see his reaction. String was in disbelief. How could she think he would leave her for any reason?
"Cait you think I would ever leave you? "
Cait ran down the stairs and to the book case where the photo album had been tucked away. She ran back upstairs tossing it on the bed beside him. He picked it up looking confused.
"It's a photo album of you. What does this have to do with anything?"
Cait was trying to hold back the tears. "I need to ask you something String and I want the truth."
"I always tell you the truth Cait." He said as he got up sitting on the edge of the bed.
She wiped the tears that had escaped onto her check. "When did you fall in love with me?"
String was trying to figure out in his head how this all tied together. He took a moment to answer. "That day in the Pope County jail."
He was not prepared for her reaction to his answer. Cait cried harder as she started pulling her clothes out of drawers as if she were preparing to leave.
"Cait, what's gotten into you?" He said as he stopped her from packing. "Cait look at me, tell me why you want to leave."
Cait tried to release herself from his arms but he refused to let her go. "Please Cait tell me why you're upset. At least let me know what I've done wrong."
She pushed gently on his chest and he released her, never taking his eyes off hers.
"I don't believe that is when you fell in love with me. The night I came here and told you I was in love you made it clear that you did not feel the same way."
"Cait, I…"
"No String let me finish." She walked over and picked up the album. "I think you fell in love with this woman, not me. When I left you just let me go without a fight. When you saw these photos that's when you decided you loved me. You had no feelings for me before I became a model?"
String stood in disbelief. Not saying a word. For once this exasperating woman had him at a loss for words. She took his silence as validation that what she felt was true. Then he did something totally unexpected, he began to laugh which made Cait cry even harder as she flung her things in the suitcase she had pulled out of the closet.
String tried to stop her as she slapped at him. "Cait will you just simmer down and listen to me? I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at the situation."
Cait took a tissue from the box and blew her nose. String smiled. As bad as the situation was he couldn't help notice how beautiful she looked even with her red nose and puffy eyes. Guiding her to the chair by the bed he sat her down kneeling in front of her and cupping her chin so she would look at him.
"I did fall in love with the woman in the photos. She is the same woman I fell in love with in the Pope County jail. I just never knew it until she was gone. Cait I have spent most of my life avoiding letting anyone in much less falling in love. I never meant to hurt you that night. When I came back and found you had left I was devastated. Then when you wrote Dom it sounded like you were happy."
Cait blew her nose again. "But I wasn't happy."
String reached up to push her hair out of her eyes. "Yeah but I didn't know that. So many time I wanted to call you and ask you to come back but I was convinced it was for the best. If it makes you feel any better I wasn't with anyone else after you left. I have never wanted another woman the way I want you."
Cait pondered all that he said then a sudden realization hit her. "Then why were you laughing when I told you how I felt?"
String stood up running his hand through his neatly cut brown hair. "You're not the only one that has a question and wants an honest answer."
"What is it String?" She couldn't imagine what he wanted to ask her.
"When you started getting calls from your agency I thought you wanted to go back to modeling and I was in the way. I thought that maybe you stayed with me because you felt you had to."
Caits mouth was wide open but nothing came out. She was at a loss for words. Just when he thought he wasn't going to get an answer she spoke up.
"String how could you possibly think that? I spent almost two years waiting for you and then I make a fool out of myself in front of just not you but your date as well by professing my love for you, I leave the country and almost get myself killed, then I return to help you when you needed me. If that doesn't prove I love you then I don't know what will. And as far as staying because I felt I had to, I wouldn't do that to you."
Both of them were silent for almost a full minute processing what each one had said to the other. String was the first to break the silence. "Cait I need you to know that I love you with all my heart. I don't want to live my life without you in it. I need to know that you believe me."
Cait placed her hands on his chest looking up into his eyes with as much love and sincerity that she had to give. "String I need you to know that I have never loverd nor will I ever love a man as much as I love you. I am here because I want to be not because I have to."
String placed a tender kiss on her lips. "Let's promise each other that we will never hide our feelings from one another again."
The rest of the night was spent showing just how much they did love each other.
