Chapter Thirteen
"You could have told me, you know!"
Annie's eyes nearly fell out and rolled along the marble floor. "Are you joking, Hitch?"
Hitch stomped her foot. "I would have helped you."
"Helped me try to kill you, you mean?" Annie crossed her arms.
"Helped you get out of whatever situation made you feel like you had to kill." Hitch tossed her head. "I actually did want you be your friend when we first met, remember?"
"Not really."
"Either way," Ymir cut in. "You can be friends now." She smirked at Annie, who glowered back at her.
"If you're both titans on the same side, shouldn't you like each other?" Hitch asked after a pause.
"I wish they would," Historia said, casting her eyes towards the shining floor. "But … people are walled up in here, and we still fight even though we're against the titans. So I can't expect them to get along."
"I'm not against the titans," Ymir objected.
Annie raised an eyebrow.
"Then explain what you mean." Historia blinked.
Ymir beamed. "Well. The titans themselves aren't against us. They can't help … being strong."
She shook her head, hoping no one thought she wanted to excuse herself. She didn't. She couldn't. "It's people like Zeke and whoever wants to kidnap Bertl that manipulate and ruin everything."
Historia thought of Grisha murdering Frieda, of her father's cowardice. "But they're only acting on the hurt they feel."
"We know. I think all of us know that." Ymir closed her eyes, suddenly very tired. All she wanted was to hold Historia and sleep.
I don't think I do. Hitch had never been hurt the way Historia had, never been a titan like Ymir or Annie. She'd been a shallow girl clamoring for the attention of the only man who wouldn't give it to her.
But I really did care about him. Tears pricked her eyes. Marlowe, I can't let you go.
"What do you think they're talking about?" Jean pointed across the room. Hitch was hanging back, and he wanted to protect her. She was who he could have been without Marco.
"Hopefully cutting the feelings and deciding on a plan," Levi said, tapping his foot.
"Hmm." Jean hesitated.
"You have something to say?"
"What?"
"You."
"Nothing – I just – it's like you're afraid of feelings or something," Jean protested.
Levi's eyes widened. "Tch. Brat."
"Did something upset you?" Jean ventured, quelling his shock that Levi would show him any semblance of emotion.
"Nothing." Levi scowled. Hange had better hurry back. For a loner, he couldn't manage alone very well.
"Pass me the peroxide. We have to polymerize the serum." Hange pressed her quivering eyes against the fuming vial. "This is fascinating, Eren!"
"I can tell, Squad Leader." Eren shoved the peroxide in her direction. "But, shouldn't you be careful not to put your face so close?"
Hange scoffed. "When did you become Moblit?"
Silence collapsed around them, around the dusty shelves of chemicals, from science long since abandoned under Reiss rule.
"Oh. Hmm." Hange drew in a shuddery breath as she fell down a well again, desperate eyes replaced by bright flashes. "I'm sorry, Eren."
"You did nothing, Hange." Eren swallowed. "I wish I could have done more."
"More? You can't."
"I have the Coordinate." How do I unlock it? Do I even want to? Could I have saved Moblit, too? Eren choked back a scream. Dad, why didn't you tell me anything?
"And I have science. We're limited in understanding, all of us. No one can save the world alone. Not even you. Ah, got it." Hange held up a vial of frothing liquid. "No idea how long we let it settle, though."
"I, uh, I'm willing to try – " Eren held out his arm.
"I hope I don't take away your abilities." Hange frowned. She hadn't expected the vial to warm up so much, but she wasn't about to drop it. "Maybe it would be safer to inject me."
"I thought you wanted to inject me."
"I wasn't thinking. Even scientists fail to think sometimes. Like you just said, you have the Coordinate. We can't risk that." Hange nodded. "Ymir or Annie, though…"
"Oh fuck that!" Eren grabbed the vial. "Now cut me open!"
The vial dropped to the floor.
"EREN!" yelped Hange as the serum erupted.
Saskia stumbled outside the prison compound, refusing to let herself feel a thing. She would go to Zeke and apologize, fit back in among the Warriors, and even if it killed her, it was worth it if she could save Erwin and the rest of the Survey Corps.
"Saskia!" Bertolt leapt out of the shadows and grabbed her arm, his eyes brimming with tears. "I didn't mean to – I'm so sorry! I just wanted to help you, I promise!"
"I know," she admitted in monotone, glancing around to see the town deserted in the darkness. "I don't blame you. It's my fault; it's all on me."
"It's not," Bertolt said angrily. "It's on all of us in this fucked up world."
"That," said Reiner. "I agree with. But we have more problems if you want to save all your friends." He laid a hand on Bertolt's shoulder.
"What do you mean?" Saskia stared at him. "Reiner, what did Zeke do?"
Of course, she was now assuming the worst of Zeke. Her husband, of sorts. Fuck her.
"He turned Armin into a shifter. I – I couldn't dissuade him."
"What?" she exclaimed, as Bertolt asked, "Who?"
"Marcel's father. The only man who started questioning our mission." Reiner wrung his hands.
Saskia's gaze bored into Reiner.
"If Armin hasn't learned control – what if Zeke tries to force him to turn into a titan?"
"Killing the Survey Corp by their own. It's ironic." Saskia closed her eyes. "And he likes ironic."
Don't give in, stay emotionless, stop caring.
"I'm going to help Armin no matter what," Reiner said. He's my only chance – my only chance to do one good thing – before I die.
"Then get him out of here." Saskia folded her hands on Reiner's. I can't be emotionless anymore, she realized with some horror and more relief.
"We have to get them all out of here, please. You two know – you know they deserve to live. Maybe more than we do."
"We can't just transform and take them. There's too many, and faster shifters will find us first." Reiner paused. He was discussing flat-out treason. No, he was a soldier again.
Maybe. Or maybe he was both, and he was giving a flying fuck you to the traitor he had been, to obedience. I was meant to be a soldier.
"Just don't let me know your plan. It's too dangerous," Saskia said sadly.
"We'll get you out, too," protested Bertolt.
"And have Zeke more unstable?" Saskia shook her head. "I have to find him."
"Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"No, but I'm doing it." Saskia turned towards her home, her former home. As she hurried away, Sarah stepped out from hiding to watch the woman who'd betrayed her son.
Zeke's fist sent splinters flying, some into his face. He didn't care. Let their home wall fall. Ironic.
The door flew open.
"Was the first betrayal not enough? You have to pretend you love me now?"
"Stop lacerating yourself." Saskia grabbed his hands, glared into his eyes. "I'm not a good person. I never have been."
"Damn right," he spat, jerking away. "Did you ever love me? Saskia?"
"Yes," she insisted, even as spiders unfolded in her stomach. She never had. She merely pitied him, appreciated his protection. Fuck me.
He had to believe her, though. For Erwin. She tried to force herself to tears.
"Oh, don't pretend." Zeke shoved her away. "You're just like my mother, like my father. You never cared. I hope you're happy."
"Of course not."
He almost wished she were uncaring, so he could hate her more. "Is this your repentance speech?"
"I think I'm past that point."
Zeke chortled. "Aren't all humans."
"Is that what you want?"
"No." Zeke cupped her cheeks, drawing her closer to him. "I want to hate you. Forever and ever. I thought I was a brilliant tactician, but you just might be better than me." He spat in her face, then backed away, his eyes roaming the dark bedroom.
Saskia sank to the floor and wrapped her arms around herself. The spit churned her stomach, but she deserved it.
She felt scared, but no more scared than when Dad raged before. But this time she felt guilty, oh, so guilty.
"I hate you," Zeke ranted as he paced. "I want to kill you. Maybe that would make me feel better. Would you like that, if I killed you? Proved myself not to be 'a good man?'"
You want me to love you. But should she say it? "You – you want me to love you."
Zeke stopped short. "Excuse me?"
"You want me to save you, to make you feel whole." Saskia fought back tears. "But I'm a broken person, and I can't do that. Dammit."
The room fell into an eerie silence. When she finally heard him moving again, she wondered if he was grabbing a knife.
Instead she felt his warm body huddle up beside her.
Eren coughed in a sea of golden smoke. A vague smell of rot burned his eyes. "H – hange?"
"Not Hange," a voice purred behind him.
A cloth dripping with a sickly sweet liquid clamped over his mouth.
Not again! I'm fed up on kidnapping plots, you fool! Holding his breath as much as he could, Eren dove forward into the smoke. You'll have to drag me outta here, bastard!
"Oh no you don't!" The man scrambled to keep a hold on him – no – Eren bit his inner cheeks to keep from screaming – he was overpowering him –
Someone barreled forward and shoved Eren back to the ground. "Let him go or I'll dump this on you."
Hange waved around a bottle of a clear liquid. "This is called nitric acid. It'll devour you slower and more painfully than the titans."
The man gasped, hesitated, his fingers still on Eren's collar.
"I don't care who's paying you; it's not worth your life," Hange snapped.
"But is it worth my family's?" the man burst out.
Eren's eyes widened. He wasn't – all evil –
The man dove towards the door – and was immediately sent flying backwards by a very short, annoyed man.
"What the fuck is going on here?" Levi strode in.
"Levi, I think we had another kidnapping attempt. On Eren, this time." With a hand on her hip, Hange scowled at the kidnapper, still motionless from Levi's kick.
"I see…why they say…you're the strongest…" mumbled the man.
Levi rolled his eyes.
"Don't talk to him unless he asks you first," Hange said, tossing the glass bottle back to the floor.
"Hange!" Eren yelped, leaping to his feet away from the splashing acid.
"Oh, that? Eren, it's water." Hange smirked.
Dense silence, the kind impossible to breathe in, had overtaken the prison cabin.
Erwin felt naked before his troops, ugly and deformed. They knew now that he was still a foolish child, that he was no one worth following, no one special – just a man who had led them and their comrades to death again.
Flocke's eyes swept him up and down. Erwin could feel them without looking up.
"Did you actually care, or were you just using her?"
"Flocke!" scolded Sasha.
"You shouldn't talk like that," Connie said uneasily.
I deserve it. "That is not information you need to know."
The door creaked open. "Your nightly guards have come."
"Reiner," gasped Armin. There was no nightly guard. No one was stupid enough to escape on foot in titan territory. You meant knightly, didn't you.
Bertolt's lanky figure stepped in front of his friend. "C-commander, I'm – I'm s-s-sorry."
"Sorry for what?" Erwin asked sharply as the colossal titan quaked in front of him.
Bertolt glanced behind him. With a subtle nod from Reiner, he slid the door shut. "I was trying to keep Saskia alive, I swear. I would never have told Zeke otherwise."
Erwin's face reddened. The eyes of all his soldiers were back on him. He felt more invaded than when the Military Police had tortured him before his execution. "So you're saying you don't want the commander of your enemies dead?"
"I believe you," Armin said at the same time. Oops. "I'm sorry, sir."
"I don't – I don't think so," Bertolt stammered.
"Think?" Connie growled.
"I'm wrong." Bertolt wrung his hands. "I've been wrong to all of you."
"Yes, you have," Flocke said with a scowl.
"Shh." Mikasa waved Bertolt on.
"I'm going to get you out. Somehow." Bertolt looked at Armin. "Better you don't know just yet."
Reiner told him about the tunnel, Armin realized. "Do you think it's at all realistic? We're far from the walls."
"Do you think it's at all realistic that I would be helping you?" Bertolt grabbed Armin's arm. "Please. I'm begging you."
"You're begging?" Armin's mind churned. That book, that holy book he'd read –
"We'll get out. Together," Armin promised. He turned around, looking at the people he knew and loved – broken Bertolt, confused Connie, wide-eyed Sasha, cynical Flocke, precious Mikasa, and a pensive Erwin. "When we are weak, then we are strong."
"That's fool's talk," Flocke said.
"I agree," Mikasa said. "Armin, if we are weak, we won't survive."
"But I have," Armin replied.
"We had better hope Armin is right," Erwin said, that dim candle of hope refusing to die yet again. The candle that had lit when his father spoke of the outside world, the candle that'd gotten him through Father's murder, Marie, Wall Maria and now Saskia. The soldiers fell silent.
"Humanity is weak, but we keep fighting. That's how we are strong. Hoover, I don't trust you or Braun or any warriors. But I'll accept your help."
"Are you mad at me for Marcel?" Ymir asked Annie. Off in a corner, Hitch was acting like a monkey to distract Jean and Historia from whatever had caught Levi's alarm.
"What?"
"I ate him. Surely Bertl told you that." Ymir made a face.
"No, he didn't actually. Bertolt is nicer than he needed to be." Annie shrugged. "I don't fault you."
"That's good, because I fault myself."
"It wasn't your fault."
"It still hurts. I don't remember his face, or anyone's. I wish I could, but there's no use wishing, is there." Ymir looked back at Historia. And yet, there was the girl who made her believe in wishes.
"No," Annie agreed.
"We're quite alike, aren't we? Though I'm far less tortured about my past." Ymir leant closer to Annie.
Annie huffed. "I suppose."
"You were a kid. If it wasn't my fault I ate Marcel, it wasn't you or Reiner or Bertolt's fault, you know. And it's not your fault you failed, either." Ymir sincerely hoped practical Annie would believe her more than Reiner and Bertolt had.
Was this being nice? Nah, she just wanted Annie to be her ally, right?
Or maybe Historia had opened a side she hadn't seen before.
"Actually, it was my fault I got caught." Annie recalled Armin. She'd seen the gleam of recognition in his terrified eyes, but she'd dismissed it because she couldn't be certain. He was good, so she'd wanted him to live.
And then he told her no one was good. The irony.
Come back, Armin.
Ymir watched Annie's lips move, as if praying for someone or something. Armin.
Of course. Whatever her thoughts, now probably was not the time to press her.
But, goodness, Levi was taking his time returning. Across the room, Historia met her eyes, and Ymir finally admitted her concern.
"This serum is fake. It shouldn't have exploded," fumed Hange.
"Well, we weren't sure how long to mix it for," Eren reminded, standing guard by the defeated kidnapper, a rather glum man with too many wrinkles for his age.
"Pah." Hange grabbed the peroxide again and sniffed it. "Would that Mike were here. Levi, smell this."
"Herbal," Levi said after inhaling. "But a kind I haven't smelt before. At least, it's not a type commonly found in teas."
"And we all know that's about as far as your expertise goes," Hange remarked, her eyes fondly caressing his face. Eren felt distinctly uncomfortable.
"So it's not peroxide. Mislabeled, or most likely, someone foiled our plans again." Hange slammed the bottle on the table. "Eren, let's help Levi carry this fool upstairs. Maybe a visit by the Queen herself will intimidate him."
"More like canoodle him," Levi grumbled, to Eren's amusement.
"I won't talk," stammered the man.
"Yes, you will," Levi said, yanking him towards the stairs.
"Captain!" Jean leapt to his feet as they entered the Great Hall. "What happened? We sent Annie down to look for you."
"Annie? Alone?" Levi shoved the kidnapper to the floor a bit more forcefully than intended.
"With Hitch," Jean said.
"We don't need to worry about her anyway," Ymir said with a roll of her eyes. Not as long as Annie cared for Armin.
"It's easy to get lost down there." Eren looked at Hange. "We should find them before someone else..."
"You're staying here, Jaeger," barked Levi. "Jean, you're one of the normal humans here. You go find our lost comrades."
"I'm impressed; that's the first time you've called me normal," Hange remarked.
"I take it back."
"The queen heard it," Ymir called. Don't think I haven't heard how you manhandled my Historia, short stuff.
Historia smirked at Levi.
Was it possible? wondered the kidnapper. Had he planned this all along? Was I bait?
By mid-afternoon, Connie was thirsty and exhausted and excessively grumpy. Not that he expected captivity to be fun, but just when he felt miserable enough, three warriors had visited and bound them all. He doubted Reiner and Bertolt had accounted for this in whatever escape they had schemed.
That was why Connie was nearly done untying his ropes. There were benefits to being small, and Connie now knew that wiggling free of knots was one of them. He was nearly done, and this bastard would pay for what he'd done to Mom and Marlowe and Erwin – it hurt, seeing the commander.
Reiner's sudden appearance halted his ambitions. Connie still didn't trust him, and that hurt.
"It's time. You've got to come with me." Reiner grabbed Armin.
"What?" Mikasa erupted.
"Shh," Sasha snapped.
"You shh," Mikasa retorted. "No one's taking Armin from me again."
Behind her, she felt someone's hands begin working on her restraints. Just a few more seconds, Armored Titan.
"Just what is happening here?"
Reiner whirled around. "War Chief."
Zeke stood there, Saskia a few paces behind him. Come and see what I've done, he'd told her. If he tried to make Armin transform, she would die to stop him.
"Reiner, what are you doing with our newest recruit?"
"Trying to actually recruit him," Reiner said, his face pink.
"Really." Zeke tilted his head. "Like you tried to actually lock Armin inside the library?"
"W-what?"
"Reiner wouldn't," Bertolt said, materializing besides Saskia. She exchanged a look with him; at least two of them shared terror.
"Oh, but he did."
"I locked myself in," Armin said angrily.
"You're a terrible liar."
"He's telling the truth, sir," Reiner said.
"Oh really? How's this for truth? I've had it with you and your whiny, scheming ways!"
Zeke threw Reiner outside the cabin and pinned him down. He jammed his fingers down his throat so far he gagged. His head smacked against the earth, and Reiner felt certain he was trying to rip his tongue out. His scream was muffled and broken, but horrible to hear.
"Zeke," Saskia said urgently, grabbing Bertolt's sleeve to hold him back.
Erwin started. She was here, hiding behind Hoover. Did she want him to offer his life for Braun? If only he could afford to give his life away so easily – he'd have done it over and over again.
"I can't take this." Mikasa tossed her rope to the side, dove forward and tackled Zeke. They might not escape today, but this monster was torturing a defenseless man, a man she'd once befriended.
"You bastard." As Mikasa wrestled to restrain him, Zeke bit his lip. Hard. Mikasa's eyes widened.
"No!" shrieked Bertolt.
As Erwin, Saskia and the rest watched in horror, the three brawlers disappeared in a fiery explosion.
"I suspect the lab is in the lowest level. You agree, don't you?"
"Stop chattering so much. It's unnatural. Even for you." Annie pushed past Hitch.
"But it's just like old days! Well, we only had a month or so. But still." Hitch didn't know what to do except talk.
"Levi should have found them already. We should just wait." Annie leant against the wall.
"Admit it. You're happy to see me and the Military Police doing work."
Annie rolled her eyes.
"I'm happy to see a titan doing good, too," Hitch added.
Annie's face burned as she turned her back. I'm not a titan. She bit her lip, lest she kick Hitch's pretty painted mouth.
Hitch shrieked.
Annie whirled around to see a long knife etching Hitch's throat. "You want me."
"And we'll have you," growled a heavily scarred woman. "Or we'll slice up your friend."
Hitch squeaked.
"She's not my friend."
"Very well."
"That wasn't an answer. Idiot." Annie held out her hands. She could get to the bottom of this. Better Hitch not follow.
She didn't pity Hitch or want her alive. She just wanted to solve this mystery. Obviously.
You're as much a liar as Ymir.
"Tie her up," ordered the woman. Two more thugs appeared.
"You can't let them – Annie!" Hitch wanted to fight, but she liked her neck intact too much.
"It's about time someone learned the truth, isn't it. Might as well be me. I deserve it." Annie made no attempt to fight back as the woman gagged her. You poor, pathetic cripple. You're as bad as me.
"Stop faking! You're tired and you want to die, don't you?" screamed Hitch. "Well, I don't want you to die! I have no one else! Annie!"
The scarred woman's punch sent Hitch hurtling into the granite wall.
Mikasa's limp body plummeted right next to the carbin doorway. Blood gushed from a gaping hole in her thigh.
Armin strained against the rope, trying to inch closer, closer, just enough to put pressure on it so his friend didn't die before his eyes.
A charred but functional Reiner coughed and crawled closer. Mikasa is hurt.
Mikasa struggled to sit upright. Her leg…pulsing arteries and muscle, down to the chalky white bone, all was exposed.
I'm going to die, she realized in disbelief. Eren.
"No!" Bertolt ran forward, shoved his hands against the wound, though she certainly wasn't able to stem the bleeding in any considerable way.
Connie tried to stand, but Sasha yanked him back. Don't you dare give yourelf away.
But, Mikasa. Sasha cringed. She wasn't sure she believed in any god, but one had better hear her now. Help her.
"So you're both traitors, too," the Ape titan said.
"We had to be friends!" Bertolt cried. "Why were we expected to fake it? To just switch it off? How can anyone do that? Why is that unacceptable to you? Why did you make us do this?"
The ape titan swung at Bertolt, who narrowly dove out of the way.
Saskia shouldn't try anything if she wanted Erwin to live.
But she had to. For these sweet, broken people, she threw herself into the fray.
"Zeke!" she screamed at the titan, pressing down on Mikasa's leg with all her might. "Listen to me, Zeke! She needs medicine!"
"I think not," said the titan with a forced smile. This was messier than he intended for Reiner's outing, but he didn't mind a little blood.
"She does!" Her hands were slick. Mikasa's face grew paler by the second.
"If you help her, I'll do whatever you want," Saskia pled.
No, Erwin wanted to scream. But this was Mikasa. Levi's relative.
"Help him," Saskia commanded, as rivulets of his blood dribbled over her fingers. "Please, Zeke. I need you to let her live. B-because I need you."
The titan glowered in response.
"You're good!" she howled. "You are good! Now act good! Come on, I know you can do it!"
The titan's expression never changed. "Very well."
Saskia gasped with relief as Zeke grabbed Mikasa and pressed his enormous hands over the wound. Mikasa gasped with pain.
"Saskia, free Armin. Let's see him save her."
"Me – me?" Armin stuttered.
"How do you think you can?" The ape smirked.
Armin felt like sobbing. All along, they were playing into his hands. There was no choice. "Free me."
"I – " Saskia swallowed and began pulling out the knots. "You can do this. Remember who you are, who you love." She put a hand on Armin's shoulder, not giving a fuck if Zeke saw that as more treason. "Remember who you love."
Armin bit his palm as she scurried back, and with another burst of light, a steaming titan, straw-haired and gaunt, emerged.
"What?!" shouted Flocke.
He felt tired, so tired.
Angry. More angry than tired, even. The anger pounded through his ears.
There was a bleeding girl held out to him. By an ape.
None of this makes any sense.
Armin looked at his hands. They seem normal.
No, steam. There was steam.
Mikasa!
He reached out and clenched her leg. The heat seared into her, and Humanity's Second Strongest screamed from the cauterization.
"We'll have to cut him out, Zeke," Saskia was shouting. "He won't be able to switch back without us."
And then the ape had a knife, and it was swinging towards Armin –
His eyes closed. He had never felt emptier.
